Chapter Ten

New Times, Same Old Ares

"Well, I see the gang's all here," Ares said as he looked around at everyone. "All here, plus two. And I have to say, as a god I'm a bit embarrassed to admit I'm somewhat puzzled about what's going on."

"You can thank Alti for that," Annie replied. "She cloned these two from hair samples she got from somewhere."

"Alti. That name's vaguely familiar."

"She's the shamaness who's been trying to kill me since -- forever, it seems like," Xena told him.

"Oh yeah, I remember her. Thought she was so great and powerful."

"Powerful enough," Gabrielle said.

"You know," Ares said to Annie, "if you had stayed with me, this Alti wouldn't have been so much as a pimple on your butt."

"But I'M here now," Xena said to him, keeping an arm around his neck and her body pressed tightly against him. "I'm ready to go whenever you are."

"Well, I don't know. Like, uh -- one of them said," he said indicating either Mattie and Gabrielle, "this isn't Greece anymore. Things have changed."

"So? You've always wanted a warrior queen, and here I am."

"It's not that I don't appreciate the offer, but the people I'm working with aren't exactly partial to women running things."

"So, make me a general."

"It doesn't work that way. They believe a woman's place is out of sight and completely obedient. There's no place for you."

Xena pulled away from him, anger starting to show on her face.

"You always wanted an heir," she said, sounding slightly desperate. "I'll give you one, more than one, as many as you want, but I want to be at your side, fighting the wars, just like you always wanted me to."

"An heir sounds good, and we certainly could have fun in the process, but as far as making war goes, I really can't use you."

"What the hell are you saying?" Xena asked, now angry.

"He's saying he wants you to be his whore," Annie answered.

Without warning, Xena punched Ares as hard as she could in the face. Not expecting it, his head was snapped to one side.

"Hey!" he said, momentarily angered. Then he grinned. "I see the fire's still there."

"You son of a bitch!" she yelled out at him and hit him again, but this time her fist bounced off his face, hurting her hand.

Before she could say or do anything else, Annie interrupted her. "Ares, tell me something -- how could you align yourself with people who use suicide bombs to murder innocent women and children? That's not like you," Annie said.

"Not everything my soldiers do is to my liking, but these men are true warriors -- loyal, determined, fearless, driven, and dedicated. They remind me of the Spartans. Now THOSE were some fine warriors."

"I don't understand," Mattie said. "They don't worship you. They probably don't even know who you are."

"Ah, but they DO. I'm the God of War, and they like to make war. And whether they know my name or not, they DO worship the things I stand for."

"You know, I'm glad you showed up," Annie spat out. "Just to remind me again of why you disgust me!"

Ares shrugged indifferently.

"So, just how -- why are you here?" Mattie asked.

"Well, a couple of days ago I heard this irritating gnat-like buzzing in my ear. And then today one of the opposition - I like to keep tabs on both sides, was listenineg to an internet news report from home about some woman using a flying disk, so I just had to check it out. And lo and behold -- two Xenas and two Gabrielles . . . and one Joxer."

"The name's Harry, if you don't mind."

"That buzzing must have been Xena calling for you," Annie explained.

Just then there was pounding on the front door.

"Police! We have a warrant to seach the premises. Open the door."

"Are you happy now?" Annie exclaimed to Xena. "You're going to jail! You and probably Gabrielle."

"Ares," Xena pleaded to him. "You can't let me be arrested. We've got too much history together. You know you don't want me locked up."

"Never mind about Gabrielle," Mattie said, becoming as angry at Xena as Annie was.

Ares took a deep breath. "Okay, I'll take care of it, but that deal about giving me an heir is still on the table."

Ares went to the front door and opened it. There was a plains-clothed detective with two uniformed policemen standing there.

"I have a warrant to search the premises for two women suspects."

He started to push past Ares, but he put a hand on the detective's chest and took the warrant.

"Not so fast. I want to read this first."

The detective took a step backward, intimidated, but not knowing why. Ares looked at the paper then handed it back to the policeman.

"You've already searched the house. They're not here. It was all a big mistake."

"You're right," the detective said. "Let's go men. They're not here. Sorry for the imposition. Just doing my job."

Ares closed the door and turned around to face them, and smiling and cupping his hand behind his ear, he leaned slightly toward them.

"Was that a 'thank you' I heard?" he asked in a sarcastic tone of voice.

"Thank you," Annie said, swallowing her anger. "And now I think it's time you were leaving."

"Yeah, you're right. There are a few things in north Africa I need to stir up."

"You're not going to leave me here!" Xena was sounding frantic. "Come on. Take me with you. We can work something out."

"I'll be back. And then we can see about creating me an heir."

And with his usual blue flash, Ares disappeared.