A/N – Whee! Reviews! O how I lurve thee, reviewers! And, as a note, if you haven't seen/read past volume 4 or episode 21, then this might just be a large spoiler. Just so ya know. And oh, if you're wondering HOW Haku and Tsunade can be in the same chapter, feel free to ask. According to Faith, Naruto's time sequence is disrupted because she showed up. What, did you actually believe that there was no plot to this?! NAAAAAAH. I just love surprising you guys. That's all. :)

By now we all KNOW I don't own Naruto or anything other than Faith, Sadie, Bob, other OCs, and my squirrels. Anything else, well . . . We all know ain't mine.

Replies: Dancer of the Wind – I just can't resist replying to this! When I read your review, I considered the story thus far, and I suppose you have a very good point . . . XD

KKCoolGirl – You flatter me! Thanks! I'm glad you like it.

BleedingSaro – It's great to hear from you again, too! I know, I agree, it's been eras since I last updated . . . -- I am such a lazy procrastinator. And this is your new username, eh? I hope I spelt it right! .

Cyh Scaevola – Mwahahahahahaha . . . It pleases me greatly that you like this . . . fanfic.

Quote of the Day – "Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined." – Samuel Goldwyn. (Oh so true. Especially if FAITH'S the psychiatrist/therapist . . .)

Session 10 (We're in the double digits now!! –Sob – Time flies!)

"AH! This is a nice spot! Quickly Sadie, pitch the tent!"

"Our tent kinda blew up, remember ma'am?"

". . . Oh yeah . . . Well, I guess you better set up a shack or something while I kidnap a specimen!!"

XxXxXxXxX – In Tsunade-sama's Office (she is the Hokage, she deserves an office)

"SHIZUNE! Why the heck are there reports of a lunatic who is supposedly giving therapy but is really terrorizing my ninjas?!" Tsunade yelled, slamming a fist down onto her desk. (Surprisingly, said desk didn't crack or break)

Shizune looked very uncomfortable before her Hokage's wrath. "It's true, ma'am. The Anbu Black Ops report that this girl is now in the Land of Waves."

Tsunade collapsed back into her chair. She rubbed her chin thoughtfully as she replied, "Send a Genin team to stop this menace."

"Are you sure, Tsunade-sama?"

"Yes. It's just two girls who have no ninja skills at all. What harm can be done? Oh, and more specifically, send out Team 10."

XxXxXxXxX – With Team 10 – (Shika-kun is magically here! Yay!) XxXxXxXxX

"No way!"

"Yeah, Ino. We're going to the Land of Waves tomorrow."

"No way!"

"Please control your enthusiasm."

"NO WAY!!!"

"SHUT UP, ALREADY!"

"Sorry, Shikamaru," Ino looked over at her wounded teammate sympathetically. "Do the bites still hurt?"

Shikamaru scowled. "It was as if those pests were trying to eat me."

"I thought (crunch) that squirrels didn't (several crunches and smacking) eat meat," Chouji said through a huge mouthful of his classic BBQ chips.

"You're right, squirrels aren't carnivorous," Shikamaru grumbled. He was covered in Band-Aids and bandages. He also had to get rabies shots. "But those were evil mammals from down below (if you get my drift), and for satanic rodents, anything is possible."

Asuma ignored the weird conversation between his pupils (not the part of his eyes!) and took a drag on his cigarette. Kids these days, he thought disdainfully. They're so freaky.

XxXxXxXxX – The Next Morning – XxXxXxXxX

Faith walked back into the clearing. All around her was a sparse forest. She sighed.

"Where are all the Homo sapiens? All I found in this stupid forest is crickets! Crickets, crickets, crickets! The land here is made of crickets!"

Suddenly, a person wearing a blue-green kimono type-thing (I know, I'm just so good at describing things) who was also wearing a Hidden Mist Village hunter-nin mask raced by. He/she/it bumped into Faith and knocked her over onto her caboose.

"Whoa there, person, watch where you run." Faith looked up at the thing that stood before her.

"I apologize," the person said before starting to run again. But before he/she/it (gender has yet to be confirmed – it's wearing a mask, for buggie's sake!) could slink back into the woods, Faith grabbed the collar of his/hers/its kimono.

"HEY!! Do you want therapy??"

"Th . . . Therapy . . .?"

"Yeah, man, it's totally free since you're like, the first customer of my new establishment."

Before the person could even open their mouth (which we wouldn't have seen, anyway), Faith dragged him/her/it off into the woods.

XxXxXxXxX

Sadie had made a shack hut thing out of twigs and sticks and stuff. It would only house one person comfortably, but comfort (or lack of) wouldn't stop Faith from cramming her specimen into the itty-bitty living space.

"Seat your butt, now." Faith crawled into the back of her hut and sat staring at her patient who was awkwardly squatting on the ground before her.

An uncomfortable silence settled as thickly as flies on a cow.

"So . . ." Faith began, her eyes wide in the dark of the hut. "What are you?"

"What do you mean, what am I?"

"What is with you people?! Sheesh . . . Are you a boy or a girl? Talk about déjà vu . . ."

The thing before her took of his/her/its mask to reveal a smooth, gentle face and dark brown eyes, and two locks of dark brown hair hanging down in front of the face while the rest was held in a bun-looking thing.

Faith squealed like the pathetic fangirl that she is. "OH MY PASTA, IT'S HAKU!!! AND ALL THIS TIME I'VE BEEN CALLING YOU A HE/SHE/IT IN THE NARRATIVE!!!!!"

Haku sweatdropped. "No, no," he chuckled, "it's okay, really."

"No it's not!" She snapped. She flew at him and wrapped her arms around him. "Never die again!" She sobbed pathetically.

Haku was puzzled. Sure, he was often mistaken for a girl. It was kinda annoying to him, but it's not like it bothered him that much anymore. He had gotten used to it. He had accustomed himself. Adapted. Evolved into a being that could handle the gender-confusion. But the knowledge that he had fangirls was staggering. And what did she mean by "die"?

"Err . . . I haven't died, as far as I know."

Faith looked up at him. Her eyes narrowed. "Everything's whacko. Ever since I graced you all with my presence, your order of events had an ulcer, did a back-flip, and bam, here we are today."

Haku blinked.

Faith released him and shrugged. "Did you actually believe that there wasn't a plot to this thing?" She suddenly cackled in an Indian accent, "Oh ho, ho, ho, ho! No, there's a BIT of a storyline. I shudder to imagine what a total anarchy would be like with ME smack in the middle of it."

"Umm . . . Isn't this therapy?"

"NO! I kidnapped you! If you stay with Zabuza, you'll die. NO, no, no, Faithie-Poo isn't about to let her precious kick the ol' buckaroo just yet. Instead, you'll come with me! And serve me in all my psychological splendor."

Haku gaped at her. "W-what do you mean?! Are you going to try and take me away from Zabuza?!"

"Yes. Precisely. You, from this moment forward, are no longer his pet. You are no longer his puppy. You are no longer his loyal and faithful schnauzer. You are now MY schnauzer, MINE!!!! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!"

XxXxXxXxX – With Shika-kun (and the rest) – XxXxXxXxX

"Ugh . . . Do we have to travel through these woods? They're so troublesome."

"Yeah, well . . . Camouflage and stealth are important, y'know."

Ino sighed loudly. "When are we going to get there?! It's so gross in these woods!" She wrinkled her nose as a cricket scurried past. "The Land of Waves has a serious roach problem!"

Suddenly, Chouji screamed and fell to his knees. Asuma, Shikamaru, and Ino whirled around and raced to his side.

"What's wrong?!" Ino practically shouted at him.

"I RAN OUT OF CHIPS!!!!"

Silence . . .

The Forest of Crickets came to life with a chorus of awkward chirping.

"SO troublesome . . ."

XxXxXxXxX

A/N- Woooooo, this was long. O.O But I am very muchly guilty for procrastinating it so much. -" Err . . . Faith hearts Haku . . . HEART!!!! girly giggle

ANYWAY, enjoy. YES! There is a PLOT! sob I PROMISED MYSELF I WOULDN'T DO IT!!!! FAITH LOATHES PLOTS!!!!

Peace. Good day. Bye-bye. TTFN, Ta-Ta For Now.