I was disappointed the next morning when I woke up and Loki was already gone. I went about my usual routine of reading, drawing and snacking on mystery fruit. When evening came, Loki was still nowhere to be found. He's usually home by now, where is he? I tried staying up to wait for him, but the pull of sleep was much too strong and I wound up waking in the middle of the night with a kink in my neck from sleeping on my chair and decided to just go to bed and see him in the morning. This went on for the next week, with no contact from Loki. I would have thought he wasn't coming home except his light was sometimes on, shining through the bottom of his door when I would go to the kitchen for a midnight snack.
After eight days of radio silence, I was plucking my courage to confront him when a bright orange envelope slipped under the entrance door. Picking it up, I noticed the letter was kind of addressed to me. Inside was a very elaborate and formal invitation to a party in the Grand Master's suite with an added folded slip of paper addressed to Loki.
Now he has to talk to me! Standing in front of his bedroom door, I took a deep breath to calm my nerves; I knocked twice and waited. He answered the door quickly dressed in a pair of silk pajamas, the top half buttoned as if I had interrupted him.
"Yes?" Ok, that was curt.
"This was just slid under our door." I handed him the two pieces of paper.
"Why did you open this?" Is he mad? Really?
"The envelope had my name on it. Well it had 'female human' written on it so I rightly assumed I was to open it. That had your name, so I didn't read it."
He unfolded his letter and, after a few moments of reading, clenched it in his fist.
"What is it this time?"
"We have been invited to an exclusive party in the Grand Master's suite."
"Yeah, I gathered that. It went fine last time, why are you so angry?"
"He's intrigued by you." The muscles in his jaw tightened.
"Intrigued? By me?"
"It's not surprising. I should have expected this after you were so charming. And then there was the—" he stopped suddenly as if he didn't want to continue his thought.
"The what?"
He looked away from me, "The kiss."
"Oh. That." We stood there awkwardly for a while, neither saying anything until I had to break the silence, "Is that all?"
"He also said I am to dress you this time to my own personal liking."
I blushed. What does that mean? Ignoring that I pressed on, "I read it a little fast, when is the party?"
"Tomorrow night. I think its best we both retire to our own rooms and get some rest." With that he shut his door, kind of in my face. That was rude! What the hell is going on with him?
I did as he said and went to my room, crawling into the bed, but just laid there for what felt like hours overanalyzing everything that had just happened and everything that might happen the next day. When sleep did come, it was still restless and I woke feeling groggy and puffy. Loki was gone, as was the new usual so I tried my best to relax as I knew the party was going to be anything but relaxing.
A garment box arrived midday, but being addressed to Loki and not me I left it on the coffee table unopened. I wonder what his preference is: Sexy? Modest? Classy? Slutty? Does he even care what I look like? Does he even care about me at all? It was hard to fight the negative thoughts swimming through my mind.
When Loki finally did come home, he didn't say much to me. He went straight into his room and shut the door. Again? What the hell man?! I was ready to give up on any conversation when he emerged from the room wearing a fitted dark green suit, with a black skinny tie and pocket square. He looked incredible. Untouchable.
"Are you not planning on getting dressed?"
"The box was addressed to you; I didn't want to overstep my bounds." I kept my voice void of any emotion. If your gonna ice me out, so am I. How do you like it Mr. Frosty? I can be passive aggressive too.
He seemed a bit taken aback by my attitude, but brushed it off swiftly "Well it is for you, please get ready quickly. There is an alteration tool in there as well for your makeup, I trust you can figure that out. We don't have much time so do be hasty."
Trying to keep my face neutral, I picked up the box and took it to the bathroom. What a jerk! Telling me what to do and treating me like some type of burden. Well here's some news for you pal: I can carry my own weight. I don't need you or any other man to help me, I got this. Hear me fucking roar. I continued thinking of other comebacks while trying to figure out the magic wand tool. Mimicking what the golden girls had done, I managed to create an exaggerated cat eye with dark dramatic lashes. I made lips a deep red that gave me a bit of a vampy vibe.
The dress was perfect, which really pissed me off. Asshole is fucking perfect at everything, even picking dresses. What a dick! It was an off the shoulder, black 1950's style tea length dress with dark green crinolines. It made me look like a movie star and I hated him for that. The only thing off was my hair, but I had no way to fix that so I just left it hanging naturally. I slipped on the black kitten heels and exited the bathroom feeling both incredible and unsure.
Looking up, I caught Loki staring, speechless at me. A casual wave of his hand and my hair shaped itself into elegant wave like those of old movie starlets.
That's right asshole, I'm phenomenal and you are a jerk for ignoring me. Mess with him! Mess with him! My mind commanded me and I was all too willing to oblige, "Would you mind helping me with the zipper?" I turned around, revealing the open zipper that exposed my entire back.
He stood and walked toward me, taking the zipper and pulling it closed, slowly. Mayday! Mayday! Its backfiring! He's too fucking sexy! After he had finished zipping it up all the way, his hand lingered on my shoulder blades, tracing them lightly. When he backed away suddenly, I felt a twinge in my heart at the loss of contact.
"We should get going, we wouldn't want to be late."
"Yes. Of course."
We left and walked in silence, staying at least six inches apart at any given time. There was no fanfare when we arrived this time, the atmosphere in the massive suite darker and more sultry than the last event. Topaz spotted us and guided us to the bar, ordering us drinks.
I looked questioningly up at Loki, forgetting my petty attitude I had adopted in place of the fear of how the alcohol would affect me. He slipped his arm around my waist comfortably and commented, "The Lady doesn't drink, I will take mine as a double."
"If that's what you want." Topaz reordered the drink, and I was saved.
Why does he have to be a goddamn knight in shining armor when I'm mad at him?
We walked around the party, and I was grateful for the low heels. For once I didn't need his help standing in public, though he kept his arm around me all the same. I missed his touch, I didn't realize how much until just then. He had cut himself off from me and my body was craving him. Calm down girl, you're not a cat in heat!
After quite a while of mingling, Topaz found us again and directed us to a floor-to-ceiling curtain that hid a room lined with a lime green couch that surrounded a low table. It looked like one of those VIP areas of a fancy night club. In the room was the Grand Master, who stood to greet us.
"My dears, my dears, come in, come in! I'm so excited you're finally here! This'll just be fantastic." he gestured for us to sit and we complied, Loki sitting between the Grand Master and I.
"How kind it was that you invited us again to one of your incredible parties." Loki had his fake smile plastered on once again. It was eerie how dissimilar it was from his natural smile.
"Yes, yes. Well of course I couldn't leave my pet project out of the festivities." On that note, one of the golden girls, blanche probably, entered with a tray of fantastical looking drinks. They all had pink flames flickering a couple inches above the top of the glasses, the liquid swirling on its own with what looked like flakes of different metals floating amongst the turquoise liquor.
"Wonderful timing Teil. Let's celebrate!"
Loki put on his most convincing smile yet, "Grand Master, if it's not too bold of me to say, I would prefer if the Lady didn't drink. She doesn't hold her alcohol well and I can't have her embarrassing me in public."
"Nonsense! We'll keep a good eye on her." He winked at me when he said 'eye'. Cringing this early in the conversation, not a good sign. He lifted a drink and handed it to me. He stared at me intently; I took a sip as was expected of me and felt the warmth of the alcohol spread from my throat outward. "Perfect!"
Loki took a sip from his own drink, keeping his arm around my waist. The Grand Master and Loki talked for quite a while, discussing business and gossip while I tuned in and out. Every once in a while the Grand Master would make a comment about my drink and I would take an appeasing sip before he returned his attention to Loki.
After about thirty minutes of this routine, I started to feel odd. My skin was much warmer than usual, and more sensitive. I could feel the slightest change in air circulation, causing goosebumps to form on my exposed arms. On my back, Loki's fingers started to draw circles absentmindedly. I looked up at him and he took no notice of me, instead maintaining conversation with the Grand Master. Does he know he's even doing it? Is it just me or is his breathing heavier than usual?
My thoughts were cut off by the Grand Master, who chose just then to bring me into the conversation, "And, My Dear. How are you finding you accommodations?"
Words were hard to muster, leaving me with a simple, "Good."
"And the young prince is satisfactory?" he raised his eyebrows suggestively.
Loki's hand on my back ceased its circles and tensed.
Mustering all the focus I had I replied, "Oh, yes Grand Master. Just perfect."
"Well the doctor here, in my opinion a total quack but Topaz won't let me melt him, has taken me out of commission and I am feeling the needs rise in me as the days go on."
"I'm sorry your excellency, 'needs'?"
"Yes, apparently I contracted an unfortunate virus from a Tekarian and am unable to host any of my orgies for two weeks."
I nearly spit the sip I had taken of my drink out, swallowing it with great pains at the image of the Grand Master in an orgy.
"As such I have to rely on living vicariously through others such as yourselves."
"I'm sorry, I don't understand Grand Master." His hand was still tense against my back.
"To put it plainly: I want to see you two kiss again. I know manufactured lust isn't as palpable as the natural stuff so I laced your drinks with a little helper."
"You drugged us?" For the first time I had experienced, Loki sounded angry in conversation with the Grand Master
"Only a bit, darling. A little nudge if you will. Now, let's get to kissing." He had never looked so unnervingly creepy before, leaning toward us over the low table.
After taking a deep breath, Loki leaned his head down and connected his lips to mine. Just as before, I melted into him. He kept it reigned in, his mouth closed and moving lightly against mine.
"No, no, no. I need real fire from you!" Loki pulled away and closed his eyes, like he was trying to maintain control, "My dear, why not straddle the man. Take control, and all that."
Loki's eyes shot open and I saw them darken with desire. I did as the Grand Master asked, trying to keep my body back from Loki's as well as I could. Placing my hands on either side of his face, I went in for the kiss. Loki kept his hand spread on the back of the couch, grasping the fabric as if it was the only thing keeping him on alive.
"That's no good, hold her prince. Hold her to you. Accept her."
As if that was the permission he was waiting for, Loki's arms circled around my waist, pulling me flush against him. I placed my elbows on either side of his head hugging him closer to me.
"Yes, yes. That's it!"
I barely heard him, my body tuning out anything that wasn't Loki. He broke our kiss, trailing wet kissing along my jaw line and up to my ear. He sucked in my ear lobe, causing me to gasp audibly. Through the fog of lust, I heard myself whisper, "Loki, what are we doing?" Shut up me! This is incredible, don't ruin it!
He stopped his attentions on my ear and tensed. "We need to get out of here, now." he whispered back, nearly inaudibly.
Without warning, Loki stood with my legs now wrapped around his waist. Speaking to the grandmaster he announced, "I apologize for the abruptness, we need to go back to our quarters. I hope we have satisfied enough of your voyeuristic nature to allow our departure."
Even high as fuck he can still maintain a masterful control over language. How fucking hot is that?
"Oh please do, please do."
Loki gracefully moved towards the curtain and beyond, me still held in his arms.
"Loki—"
"Not now." he cut me off, strain evident in his voice. I know I must weigh a ton, if he would just put me down I could walk. But could I, really? In this state?
We made it back to the flat in record time, Loki slamming the door behind us and then me against the closed door. We stood like that for a few minutes, his breathing heavy.
"You can put be down if you'd like." I breathed weakly.
"Not yet. Give me a moment." He laid his head in the crook of my neck, his breath tickling my collarbone deliciously. "This isn't good," he spoke into my neck, "it really isn't good. I don't know if I have the strength."
Strength? "Strength to what"
He lifted his head, connecting to my eyes and said, "The strength to stop myself." A pleasant fire began to burn in my lower abdomen. "I need you to tell me 'no'. I need you to tell me 'not to go any farther'. I don't want to do this to you again."
"What if I don't what you to stop?" I couldn't believe the words came out of my mouth. You go you little vixen you!
"You are not in your right mind. This is a terrible idea." He made to put me down so I grabbed his head and pulled him in for a kiss.
"No. We might have some crazy drug coursing through our veins, but I wanted this before tonight. I understand that I repulse you, but just for tonight. Please, just for tonight."
"How could you ever repulse me? You are the goddess I have been waiting for."
With that his lips descended on mine with a furious speed. He pressed his body hard against mine, and I could feel his muscles rippling under the suit. I desperately wanted to feel those muscles under my fingers, to dig my fingers in them and prove that this was real, that this was the man I had been craving.
A sudden change in position made me gasp into his mouth; he had adjusted me so that he could carry me towards his bed room. You take me wherever you want to go as long as I can keep touching you.
Along the short walk, his hands slid up my back before dragging the zipper of my dress back down with them. He abruptly released me, causing a moment of panic before a soft landing on his bed. He stood above me still, slowly removing his jacket, and shirt. Once divested of the offending clothes he reached forward and dragged the dress off of me.
We stayed like that, taking each other in. I didn't prepare myself for this. Sure I had imagined him shirtless before, but this was a completely different level. His lithe build was perfectly suited to his frame, each muscle clearly defined. Is a person allowed to be this attractive? Staring at his perfection, my flaws seemed to glow in my mind and I made to cover myself but his hands were on mine, pinning them on either side of my head.
"Don't you dare." A playful grin played on his face as he dipped down to lick languorously up my neck, stopping at my ear to continue, "I plan to see all of you tonight, there will be nowhere to hide." He accented this thought by slipping in between my legs, forcing them apart. I decided in that moment to give myself over to him entirely; if there was one person in the galaxy I trusted, it was him.
His mouth's ministrations on my neck were sending me into fever, burning where he touched. His skin remained cool, an unexpected sensation that only enhanced the pleasure he was giving me. Once he was sure that I wouldn't make to cover myself again, he released my hands, placing his hands back on my body where they belonged. He made short work of my bra and panties, leaving me completely naked and at his mercy.
"Unfair." I croaked out.
His attentions still on my neck, he murmured in between kisses, "What was that, love?"
"It's unfair."
"What's unfair?"
"You're still wearing clothes."
I felt him smirk against my neck before he raised his head and pierced his eyes into mine, "How right you are. Ever so thoughtless of me."
He backed off the bed, and I inwardly cursed myself for being the reason he was no longer touching me. That inner tirade was quashed when he undid the belt and his trousers slipped to the floor. Damn, son! A Goddamn gift to womankind is what that is. His expression turned roguish as he descended once again.
Biting playfully on my ear, he teased "Like what you see?"
Surprising both of us, I flipped us so I was now straddling him, pinning his hands above his head, "Let me show you how much." When did you turn into such a sexual beast? I love it!
I kissed my way slowly down his chest while I relished in the obvious force of will it was taking Loki to remain still. I had read the naughty sections of magazines, scoffing at the ridiculous advice that was printed, but it couldn't all be wrong right? Let's test one. As I was traveling south, I shot my eyes up at him through my eyelashes and caught his gaze. A twitch against my belly indicated that it was successful. Ok, score one to Cosmo. When I finally arrived at my destination I was less confident as to what to do next, but I didn't want to let him know.
His member was at full attention, and when I say full I mean it. A goddamn gift. I wrapped my hands around the base and tentatively ran my tongue along the prominent vein running along the underside.
"Oh, good god," Loki moaned while balling his fists into the sheets.
I continued my attentions, taking my time and enjoying the quiet groans I was eliciting. After few moments, another tip popped into my mind and I took as much of him into my mouth as I could and then hummed. Loki's hips jerked unexpectedly, forcing more of him into my mouth than I was ready to take making me gag with a hissed "fuck!" from Loki.
I sat up and he followed, asking if I was alright. I grimaced and replied, "It was my fault for trying something so stupid, I'm sorry."
He placed his hand under my chin and lifted it, forcing me to meet his eyes, "it was incredible. Where did you lean that?"
I bit my lip and smiled seductively, grateful that I hadn't ruined everything, "A girl has her secrets." Another point to Cosmo, who would've guessed?
"My turn then." Without warning, he tossed me onto the pillows of the bed and positioned myself between my legs.
"Wait, no, you don't have t—" he cut off my words with a flick of his tongue.
The drug in my system mixed with the skill of his tongue and fingers made me see stars in what felt like seconds. The muscles in my legs continued with minute spasms while he slid back up, pulling me to his chest. He kissed along my neck as he waited for my body to settle. I could still feel his member hard against my hip, but he remained gentle until the spasms dissipated.
I spun in his arms, gazing up at this incredible god that I had all to myself. For now, at least. The thought must have caused me to frown because Loki asked if everything was alright.
"Oh, yes. Of course."
He didn't seem completely happy with my answer but he didn't push it. I decided the best way to change the subject was to move the night forward.
I slid my hand up his stomach, feeling the muscles react to my touch. I kept my touch light, teasing him. It did the trick; he pushed me back onto my back and covered my body in his. His kiss was insistent and fierce. He pulled back and the unspoken question hung as I felt him near my entrance. A small nod was all he needed and he pushed forward.
It had been a while since I had been with anyone so the sudden invasion was shocking. It was like every aspect of myself was filled by him; any sense that I had drowned in the very thought of him. After allowing my body to adjust to him, he began to move.
We found a rhythm together, a painful sweetness building between us. I could feel myself getting close to the edge when he whispered hoarsely in my ear, "Say my name."
My eyes were past the point of seeing anything but stars, but I moaned out, "Loki."
"Again."
"Loki. I'm—I'm…"
"Yes, my love?"
"I'm almost—"
"Wren!"
"Loki!"
We collapsed together, a tangle of limbs. The drug must have been sweated out of us because the all-consuming desire was dissipating, instead being replaced with exhaustion. I allowed myself to drift off and sleep to take hold of me.
I awoke what must have been only a couple hours later because the view outside his window was still dark. I was trying to figure out what had woken me when I noticed the distinct lack of warmth; Loki wasn't lying next to me, instead sitting with his feet off the bed and his head in his hands. I sat up and reached a cautious hand out to meet his back. He started at the touch and stood, still not facing me.
"Is everything ok?"
"No. I did exactly what I said I wouldn't do. This should never have happened."
It felt like searing daggers had just pierced my chest. He regrets everything. What a fucking fool am I, thinking this meant something.
"I'm sorry. It's my fault that last night happened. I pushed you into doing something you clearly didn't want to do. I'll go." I made to get up when he finally turned to face me, a weird fire in his eyes.
"You pushed me? I was the one who took advantage of you, hopped up on some powerful drug that rendered you unable to make any clear decisions I—"
"I wasn't some innocent and helpless faun at the mercy of the jaguar, Loki. I was a willing participant and if you can't come to terms with that then I should just go."
I angrily slid off the bed and started stomping towards the door when he caught my hand.
"Willing? You wanted this?"
"Yes I did. Even after you ignored me for a fucking week like a jackass." The anger started to bubble over inside me, "You kissed me then left me hanging in the freezing wind, not even showing your face like the thought of being around me was so goddamn—"
He cut me off, pulling me into a kiss. Why does he have to be such a good kisser?
After a moment he pulled back and looked me in the eyes, "I'm sorry. My actions this week have been appalling."
"They really were. Why did you act like that?"
"I was ashamed. I allowed my desire for you to cloud my judgement and I took advantage of you."
"The Grand Master forced us to kiss, you didn't."
"There was no one watching when I kissed you in the shuttle bay. My body craved you and I gave in, and lied."
"Well that was sneaky, but nothing to become a massive dick about." I smacked him on his bare chest, eliciting a small hiss. "So, how about we go back to bed. I can honestly barely stand right now."
"If that is what the lady wants." He lifted me princess style and carried me back to the bed, putting me down gently before sliding in after.
The second time I awoke was infinitely more pleasant than the last, this time caged by Loki's strong arms. He was still sound asleep, but nature was calling and I tried to slip as smoothly out of his embrace as was possible in my state.
Loki's bathroom was connected to his bedroom, just the the right of his closet from which I found one of his long tunics to pull on. The image reflected in the bathroom mirror was not as bad as I had imagined; the make up the the magic wand put on my face had stayed in place and not smudged at all, but my hair on the other hand was a wild tangle. I started to work on it when I heard Loki's panicked voice calling my name from what seemed to be the living room.
I walked out there as quickly as my weak legs could muster to see a still very naked Loki frantically searching the room. When his eyes found me, he collapsed onto the nearest chair and ran a hand through his mop of raven tresses.
"What's the problem pal?"
"I thought you had left; I couldn't find you anywhere."
"Didn't think to check the bathroom?"
His face scrunched in embarrassment, "That would have been an excellent first place to look."
"You went with?"
He paused and looked away blushing slightly, "Under the bed."
I walked over and sat on his knee, "I can promise you that I will never hide from you under the bed."
"I couldn't find you and then I started thinking, 'what if he came and took you what would I do? What could I do?'"
"You think he might do that?" Fear started to bubble in my chest.
"I wouldn't put anything past him." His face became deadly serious and he grasped my hands in his saying, "I need to get you off this planet."