Title: Battle Tactics
Author: landofthekwt
Rating PG-13
Genre: Butt Rubbing
Word Count: 655
Prompt: Touch / Miroku and Sango Fiction
Universe: Canon
Warning: Spoiler for Chapter 105
Summary: Miroku prepares for battle
As he slowly regained consciousness, he could hear the voices of those around him: Lady Kagome, the young girl from the future; Sango, the slayer from the taijiya village; Shippou, the young fox demon. They were all hovering around him anxiously. Mentally, he evaluated his own body. Mushin had finished his stitching; the tear would not spread if he allowed it to heal. He had just been through a fight which he had thought would end in his death. Since he obviously had survived, it was time for a little fun.
Time to put the principals that Mushin had him when preparing for battle into action!
1. SURVEY THE SITUATION: The girls were leaning over him anxiously; they were obviously under the impression that he was still near death. Both were heedless of their own well being as they leaned over his "helpless" body. Prime targets…
2. CHOOSE YOUR TARGET CAREFULLY: They were both young healthy girls; both of them virgins. They were both sympathetic to him because of the injury to his wind tunnel. Kagome would normally be his target of choice – she was young, nubile, and hopelessly naive about men, the first blossom of spring just begging to be picked. The problem was Inuyasha. Although he denied he was in love with her and called her a shard detector, Miroku knew otherwise. He had seen Inuyasha risk his life for her, and send her home just to ensure her safety. Inuyasha had made it abundantly clear that any further assault on her person would not be tolerated. Thus, he turned his attention to Sango. When she had noticed him rubbing her legs as he talked to her, she had not resisted him, instead merely acknowledged his advances. She seemed interested in his well being. Somewhere underneath that rough exterior beat the heart of a woman longing to be tamed by the right man. He was always prepared for a little rough and tumble – why not with her? After all, she had no protector who would tear his arm off.
3. CREATE A DIVERSION: Miroku sat up suddenly and stared at his right hand. Both of them gasped and hovered over him. He gasped something about his hand killing him. Somehow he knew that they were on edge over his near death experience; they would do almost anything to save him. They gaped at him in fear. Could his wind tunnel be about to kill him? The diversion had worked. They were both so hypnotized by his hand and his words of concern that they failed to notice what his other hand was doing.
SWIFTLY AND WITHOUT MERCY: As Sango leaned over to hear what might be Miroku's final words, she was startled to discover that his left hand was behind her, rubbing her butt. How had he done that? Usually no man was able to get past her guard. Although the touch was not unpleasant, it was uninvited and – at the moment – unwanted. She was momentarily taken aback, but she was a warrior. A warrior never allowed an attack to go unpunished. The monk was friskier than he appeared.
She clobbered him over the head. He would live, but he would remember the consequences of his assault.
FOR THE INEVITABLE COUNTERATTACK: Did not see that one coming! As he slipped into unconsciousness, he heard the snide comments of all those around him; even Kagome and Inuyasha commented on his romantic interlude with the slayer. They might call him a lecher and slander his character, but he knew that somewhere out there was a woman willing to bear his child. In his brief contact with Sango's butt, he had made a connection with her. She was a woman whom he would like to get to know more intimately. He knew one thing: rubbing her butt was definitely worth the pain she had caused. He looked forward to his next battle with her.