Chapter 10: Frozen Emotions
It's been two days since Saitou left… and for two days that Akira finishes her chores early and waits in the gate. The snow gently fell on Akira's hands and she blew into them to try to keep them warm.
"Akira-chan, are you still standing there?"
Akira turned to see Shinpachi looking at her with a worried expression.
"I'm sorry Shinpachi-san. I was spacing out a bit," she gave him a comfortable smile.
He knew she was lying to him but he smiled back none the less. He patted her head.
"Don't worry he'll be fine," he assured her. For some odd reason Shinpachi never felt the shock or if he did, he never let Akira know.
She seemed confused for a bit, but she quickly realized who he was talking about – Saitou. He knew she was worried about Saitou, but he got something wrong. She wasn't worried about his safety. Saitou is a master's swordsman, doubting him would be insulting; she was worried about something else.
"I know," she said, her smile still on her face. She didn't have to worry him more than she had already. "I'm going to make dinner now do you want to join me?" she asked returning to her usual demeanor.
His smile widened and he agreed.
After dinner she washed the plates and claimed that she was going to bed, but only stayed in her room until she knew every one of the captains was fast asleep. She ran to wait for Saitou at the gates again, hidden from the soldiers. She stayed there until midnight. She sighed, he won't be back tonight. As she prepared to leave she saw the figure of a man walking towards into the headquarters. Saitou was back. He was wearing his usual black kimono, so one couldn't see the stains of blood from where she was, but she knew they were there. There was a small smudge of it on his cheek. He probably didn't know it was still visible.
Her face hardened, so it was an 'errand.' She didn't know why those errands always bothered her so much. There were times when the captains went on other secret missions, but those never bothered her. It was only those specific 'errands' that made her uneasy, mostly because she knew it was connected to something. But what?
She let it go because even if she didn't like it, she also didn't want to find out what it was. Instead she smiled and ran to wait for him in the garden near his room. She wanted it to seem casual; she did need to apologize after all.
She waited for a long time and so she was enjoying her view. The place looked like a winter wonderland or a snow castle. The thought of a snow castle reminded her of her favorite story – The Snow Queen. She giggled. The Queen herself was the antagonist of the story but she always felt like she can relate to her in some way. As she heard Saitou's footsteps approaching she thought, perhaps we aren't so different after all – the Snow Queen and I. Saitou came into view and she stood up to greet him.
"How was your trip Saitou-san?" she asked kindly.
His eyes narrowed and he visibly tensed. Why did she want to know? His years in the Shinsengumi taught him to never say anything related to a secret mission no matter how small the detail; those details might be hints to their enemies.
She was confused at his reaction. She didn't know whether he was disturbed by the question or because she was waiting for him. If it was the question she tried to quickly fix her mistake.
"Oh, I – I'm sorry. I didn't mean to ask such a question. Y- You don't have to answer if you don't want to," her voice became lower and lower the more she spoke. She was worried that she might have made Saitou angrier at her.
Saitou visible relaxed and swiftly walked past her. He knew the reason she was there was because she wanted to tell him something, perhaps related to Okita, but he didn't want to see her at this moment. He didn't know why, but her presence slightly irritated him. Whatever she wanted to say it could wait.
His silence was maddening. Yes, he was always quiet and yes, it usually made one uncomfortable but this was different. She could feel the anger and she knew he was being quiet to keep her away from him.
"Are you angry, Saitou-san?" she asked.
She didn't mean to ask. It honestly just came out, but now she was anxious to hear his response. He ignored her and just entered his room closing the door behind him. Akira felt heartbroken at that moment, but she wasn't planning to give up. She sat at his door.
"Saitou-san, I really want to talk to you so I'll stay here until you feel like talking okay?" she said.
And she did. She sat there until her eye lids began to get heavy. A few more minutes, she always said to herself until she finally fell asleep outside his door, not noticing the snow falling gently beside her.
When Saitou heard that she would stay, he felt a bit childish. He twisted and turned until he realized that he was being childish. He knew what Okita was like and yet Saitou chose to blame Akira for it. He sighed. He was going to talk to her, but stopped at the door. She probably already went to bed, he thought and he went back to bed planning to talk to her first thing in the morning, not knowing she was sleeping quietly outside his door with the cold snow.
Author's Note:
I know I said I would only be distracted for a few chapters but I can't help myself, I like writing moments just for those two. I'll be distracted for another two or three chapters, but after I will get to the main plot because the main character has to go through winter first. After winter, she's going to start acting like a mischeavous devil and get on people's nerves in a cute way. :)
Anyways please review because critics are an essential part of story building :)