A/N: Okay I give! I'll let you read the next chapter.

And now presenting….Edward Cullen!!!!

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/ YESTERDAY/ THE DAY ALICE JUMPED THE GIRL/THE DAY WHEN EMMETT NOTICED THAT ROSALIE'S HAIR WAS BLONDE/ THE DAY ROSALIE THREW A LAMP AT HIS HEAD/ THE DAY JASPER MASTERED THE CHICKEN DANCE/ THE DAY ALICE NEARLY PUT A RESTRAINING ON HIM

I stared at Mike as he paced back and forth thinking about Bella. Naturally.

His thoughts were furious from me winning, but I kept asking myself…when were we in a competition? He thinks it's a game? Oh, its on!

I pushed off of my Volvo and walked over to Mike while slyly slipping on some aviator sunglasses. I know what your thinking, there's sun out because I'm putting them on, and there fore I shouldn't be out here in the first place. RUN EDWARD RUN! But no, actually it's a grey gloomy and dreary day, no sun. I just like to put on sunglasses because I'm the type that wear sunglasses at night.

He was pacing back and forth like he was busy bee. His hands were behind his back and his head was low.

I slung a leather jacket over my shoulder and stuck a thumb in my pocket. Oh yeah, no competition.

Mike didn't noticed I was standing in front of him till he tripped over a rock and looked up from his trance.

I laughed threw my nose.

Mike suddenly straightened up and crossed his arms tightly over his chest to the point were he was flexing, "Cullen." he sneered.

I smiled a dazzling smile, "Newton dear friend, how is your day?"

Mike raised an eyebrow and his jaw opened slightly. I zoomed into his thoughts.

Wait, is he speaking to me? Oh my god! Edward Cullen just talked to me! ME! Oh my god! This is the best day of my LIFE! Wait wait, I have to be cool. Be cool man.

Mike straightened up again since he slouched over a bit and kept his eyebrows furrowed.

"What's gotten into you? And why aren't you busy pestering Bella?" He said raising an eyebrow.

Because its your job you moron, "We are on a break." I lied.

Mike straightened up some more, like he couldn't BE anymore straighter!

"You and Bella? Like, a relationship break?" he said.

Naw! Like a Kit Kat break! I sighed, "I'm afraid so. I hear she has the hots for someone other than me. I heard it was you." I said looking at him intentionally.

Mike laughed, "Your joking!"

I swung my foot around to show the gesture of stalling, "I wish. But I don't know, she's been like, looking at you a lot. And every time I'm with her its Mike this and Mike that." I said looking from side to side as I said his name.

Wow, I must be a good liar if he believed THAT! The only reason she would be talking about him is if she was trying to get away from him. And she never looks at him…but me, that's another story.

Mike had the hugest grin on his face, "Get outta here!"

"I don't really think you would want me to right now. I was…going to give you some tips on how to win her heart." I lied threw my razor sharp teeth coated with venom.

Mike looked like he was shocked. I zoomed in his thoughts.

No way! This cant be happening. He's giving up just like that! I wonder…if me and Bella don't work out…maybe Rosalie and I?

My eyes widened and I tried to focus on something other than that.

Mike unfolded his arms and shoved them in his pockets, "Well then, what do you say?"

I lowered my sunglasses and looked him in the eye, "You ready?" I said in a deep voice.

Mike looked like he was going to pee in his pants with joy, "Uh huh!"

I took off my glasses and placed them on top if my head.

I looked him straight into the eye and he leaned in closer, "I heard she has a thing for Elvis."

Mike's eyebrows furrowed, "Wait? And this tells me what?"

I leaned back and looked up in the sky, "Simple," then back down at him, "You dress up as Elvis, and win her heart. She's a sucker for those kind of guys." I said angling towards my Volvo.

Mike smiled so hard it looked like it was gonna be permanent, "Perfect! And I know a great costume place."

I laughed mentally, then took off towards the car.

Just then, "Wait!" he called.

I turned around halfway to look at him.

"What did you do to get her heart?" he asked.

I studied his eye sight for a moment, and thought REAL hard. I would have said Count Dracula, but is he a real player?

"I was Michael Jackson…of course." I said a slide my sunglasses back on, then strutted towards my Volvo with a John Travolta walk. Trust me, I could do that walk. While Emmett walks it out, I found my own style.

I got in my car and drove off. In the mirror I saw him practice a Elvis move were he rolled his leg.

I laughed.

This would be interesting to see.

Wherever he does it at.

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THE DAY EDWARD FOUND OUT HE WAS GOING TO HAVE A JOB

Murder would be to kind, strangling would be to simple. What should I do?

"Knock it off Edward!" Jasper said.

I pointed at Alice, "Your wife is going down!" I said pointing down towards the floor.

"AAAGGGGHHHH!!!!" Emmett screamed.

Everyone stopped covering they're ears and looked at him with confused and angered eyes.

"What is it?" Esme asked.

"EDWARD HAS BRONZE HAIR!" he screamed.

"Naw dip Sherlock!" Rosalie said.

"Its scary, nobody but mental people have that hair color!" Emmett said hugging a pillow.

"That's not true, because if it was then you'd have bronze hair!" I said pointing to my hair.

He threw the pillow at me while yelling, "POWER RANGER GO!"

I dodged the pillow but stared at him with wide and scared eyes.

"Awe not again! Emmett I'm sorry! But your not a power ranger!" Esme said.

"WHY?! EVERYONE HAS THE COOL JOBS EXEPT FOR ME!" he screamed.

Esme uncovered her ears, "You have a nice job."

"Pssh! Right, and my name is Emmett." he said rolling his eyes.

"Your name IS Emmett." Rosalie said.

"And I'm the queen of England!" Carlisle said walking down in Esme's old dresses with a plastic crown.

Everyone stared at him in horror.

"My eyes! They're blind!" Jasper screams.

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EDWARD AT WORK

I LOVE ALICE CULLEN!!!!!!!!!!!

Thank god she jumped that McDonald girl!

My punishment you ask? To work at the Newton's Outdoor job thingy.

Oh the joy! And the better part, Bella's working today!!!!

I slid on my green vest and tapped the counter top swiftly.

Bella doesn't know, but for some reason it spreaded across the whole school. Not that Mrs. Newton is complaining, the stores is getting richer as we speak.

"I WANT THESE!" Jessica said throwing a pair of $100 dollar binoculars at me.

I looked at her, "Haven't you just been here?"

Its true, this is her fourth time here. I peered out the window and saw her truck filled with our stuck threw the roof! LITERALLY!

She laughed a high pitched laughter and bounced as if she just drank five monsters. Her eyes were wide, "SILLY EDWARD! DID I NOT JUST TELL YOU? MY NEW FAVORITE STORE IS THIS PLACE!" she said pointing here.

I uncovered my ears, "Calm down!" were is Jasper when you need him?

She grabbed my collar and pulled me close, "Do you understand how many people will be here today? HUH?! Do you know how long it will take me to stand in this line just to buy all of this stuff!? Outdoors are just so important to me these days! I cant live without all of these great supplies! IM NOT LEAVING TILL I BUY EVERYTHING IN THIS STORE!" she said in a low voice till she screamed.

I pried her fingers off of me, "Okay then."

She breathed so fast she was wheezing.

I tallied up her stuff on the register, "$100."
She threw her wallet at me, literally.

I undid some buttons till I found her money. She only had $50.

I looked up at her, "you know there is only $50 right?"

"I don't care! I'll spend all of my college money if I have to!" she said slamming her palms on the counter.

I looked at her with wide eyes, "That wont be necessary."

"I HAVE TO BUY THESE!" she screamed.

I ducked behind the counter like I was getting something thrown a me…again.

"WERE DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING?!" she said once she saw me crawl away.

I stood up with a cheesy smile, "Uh, no where. Just uh, going to see if they were on sale!" I said.

"DARN RIGHT YOU ARE!" she said and pushed me towards the aisle.

She shoved my face into the glass that protected the binoculars. I screeched.

"WHAT DOES IT SAY?!" she said.
I pushed away without effort, "Lucky day! It's half off!" I lied.

She looked at me like I spoke Spanish, "Half of a hundred is fifty right?"

I kept my smile on even thought it was slipping to a look, "Yes! So you can have them!"

She threw the money at me and took the binoculars. She ran out to her car and stuck them in the trunk.

She was fixing to run back in till I locked the doors and shut the blinds.

I heard a bang on the door, "EDWARD! EDWARD IM NOT DONE YET!"

I could have called the police, but then Mrs. Newton walked in from the back door, note to self, lock back door, "Oh! Good morning Edward." she said smiling at me.

Then she looked at the door were Jessica was banging on, "Is that Miss Stanley?"

"I NEED MORE! MORE I TELL YOU! MOOOOORE!" Jessica screamed.

I sighed, "Afraid so."

She covered her heart with her hand, "Dear lord, she's possessed."

I chuckled, "Just a fan…a quite huge one."

Mrs. Newton nodded, "I see that. Is Bella not here?"

I perked up when she said her name, "Not yet, when is she suppose to be here?"

She shrugged, "Soon, till then we need Jessica to get away."

I smiled, "And when is Mike going to be here?" I said oblivious to what she said.

"He went to run an errand. Not sure what it was, but he was in a rush." she said sliding her purse underneath the cabinet.

"WONDERFUL!" I said rubbing my hands together.

She gave me an odd look and I just smiled, "Oh, I um…just haven't seen him in so long. Need to catch up with the past and all."

She relaxed her face, but had cautious eyes, "Alright then."

"OOH EDWARD! GUESS WHO IT IS!? ILL GIVE YOU A HINT…JESSICA!" she shouted behind the door.

Bella suddenly walked in with her purse over her shoulder, "Is that Jessica?" she asked with her eyebrows furrowed.

"Yes it is…she very fond of-" Mrs. Newton was saying.

"BELLA!" I said and scooped her up into my arms. I gave her a soft kiss till she became dizzy. I set her down and felt a wack on the back of my head.

I turned around and saw Mrs. Newton tapping her toe, "Mr. Cullen, I see you have disobeyed a rule here. I will be writing this up." she said.

I raised an eyebrow, "What did I do."

Bella was smiling and walking funny on her way towards the counter with her vest.

"PDA, we do NOT except such an act in this store." she said.

She pulled out a book and marked it down. Great.

I watched Bella and made sure she didn't trip or anything. She seemed fine. When Mrs. Newton was out of hearing range I walked over to Bella.

She looked at me with a smile, then she turned mad, "What are you doing here?" she asked madly.

I frowned, "I work here now, is there a problem?"

"yes there's a problem! My boyfriend works with me now!" she said pointing to me.

My eyes tightened, "You make that sound bad."

"It is! Now I cant focus." she said blushing.

I smiled, "Don't worry, I'll be sure to not be a distraction." I said and glided off.

I felt her eyes on my back.

"EDWARD! BELLA! NEWTON LADY! CUSTOMER SHUT OUTSIDE OF DOOR! WANTING ASSISTANCE!" Jessica shouted.

I looked at the door with pained eyes.

Mrs. Newton sighed, "Mike will take care of it."

And boy did he.

Suddenly the back door swung open and out popped a guy in a shiny white suite, with it unbuttoned to reveal his chest. A black wig with side burns, thick sunglasses, white shoes, and a cape connected to the jacket.

"Hey momma." he said to Mrs. Newton.

"What the--" she started to say.

But then, "You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

cryin' all the time.

You ain't nothin' but a hound dog

cryin' all the time.

Well, you ain't never caught a rabbit

and you ain't no friend of mine.

When they said you was high classed,

well, that was just a lie.

When they said you was high classed,

well, that was just a lie.

You ain't never caught a rabbit

and you ain't no friend of mine.

She looked at him like he was a terrorist.

"Thank you, thank you very much." he said.

There was a sound of silence till, "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!" Jessica went.

I doubled over and fell down on my knees nearly crying. Though I couldn't.
Bella looked at me with horror filled eyes, like she thought Mike just went mental.

"MIKE NEWTON!" Mrs. Newton screamed.

"Whoooa Nelly! Watch the cape!" he said once she grabbed it.

"You can forget the cape! And the suite! YOUR MOPPING THE FLOORS WITH IT!" she said.

Suddenly he looked outraged, "NEVER!"

He said screaming then ran out of the doors, bad idea.

Just then Jessica popped in, "OH EDWARD!"