I know I'm behind on this story. For those readers looking for something more extensive than poor Liv's thoughts in that cell, you've come to the right place!

This chapter reflects events from episode 2.12, entitled, 'Johari Window.' And if you haven't Googled 'Johari Window' yet I suggest you do. Quite interesting stuff

that may pertain to Season 3.

Unbetaed. Please take a moment to review if you like. It might get the next chapter up faster. :)

I own nothing to do with 'Fringe' except the infinite story ideas in my head. This chapter is dedicated to my friend, Observer101. You're gonna be fine. :

Activated-Chapter 10

Olivia's POV:

He looked so lonely standing there in the middle of the road in his pea coat, silhouetted by the moonlight. I walked up and stood next to him, taking some relaxing breaths. I could feel multiple emotions rolling off him. Doubt, anger, frustration, and a little self-loathing all mixed together.

I wanted to touch him, hug him, and tell him everything would be all right, but it wasn't the time or place for that. Instead, I opted for a different approach, choosing my words carefully.

"There was no ID on the guy, so we're gonna run some prints." I looked at him and decided to keep going. "You had no choice. The first time I killed someone, he was a trained killer. " Peter looked up at my face and I knew I had his attention. "If I hadn't pulled the trigger, I'd be dead. I still didn't sleep that night. Or the next." He looked a little restless, like there was something he wanted to say, but he kept quiet. "I'm just saying the first time's rough." We stood there a few more moments, an owl hooting in the distance while Peter swallowed, which I knew meant he was upset. Then he touched my arm with his hand, summoning us to rejoin the others.

Peter's POV:

I just wanted to turn back time so that the man who shot at me could just run away and not die from the bullet fired by my hand. It was the third time I'd taken a life and each time was worse than the one before. I was amazed 'Livia couldn't read this from me, that I'd killed before. It just reminded me yet again how ashamed I am of my past and how now matter how far you try to run from things they always come back. The first time it was a fatal blow to the head of one of Big Eddie's thugs. It was either him or me. I was sick for hours afterwards. I don't know why 'Livia isn't taking into account Donald Long, the man who shot our second Observer friend. That whole event flashes before my eyes again, and regardless what she thinks it was my two shots from the Observer's gun that killed him.

'Livia has come to stand next to me and I can feel emotions rolling off her. Concern, a little fear, and an emotion I can't put a name to, but it is strong.

"There was no ID on the guy, so we're gonna run some prints. You had no choice. The first time I killed someone, he was a trained killer." I look up at her. She's telling me about her first kill, but this wasn't mine, and I want to shout it to her, but I am too ashamed. I know what she saw and heard about me in Iraq scared her, probably even disgusted her, and I didn't want to see that look on her face ever again.

"If I hadn't pulled the trigger, I'd be dead.." O, 'Livia, I say to myself, I am so glad you're right here, Sweetheart.

"I still didn't sleep that night. Or the next." You have no idea, 'Livia. I'm surprised you can't feel it.

"I'm just saying the first time's rough." Someday. Someday I will tell you about my first time killing, if you want to hear about it. I wish it had never happened. Any of them.

I want to just take her away somewhere private and hold her in my arms-after I beat the shit out of some poor inanimate object. The tears threaten to spill and I try my hardest to hold them back so she can't see. I swallow hard and touch her arm with my hand, gesturing for us to join the others.

Sadly, I know this is neither the time nor the place.