It's been a while since the last update, hasn't it? I hope you guys enjoy this one, and please tell me what you think of it. I personally feel this might be the best chapter so far, but I would like to hear your thoughts.
There is a surprise in this chapter after all.
Most people would consider loneliness to be deadly, something that could tear you apart if you let it consume you long enough.
Chariot Du Nord knew that too well, and she knew how scary silence can be, how terrifying it would be to be left alone with her own thoughts. She spent years alone with them with no outside noise to push them away.
And now that she was on her own in the house, with all the noise outside?
She was just as terrified as the first year she spent on her own.
People talking, cars passing by, all the other noises that would seem normal to anyone who has lived among other people… It was all too overwhelming, too loud, horrifying.
She was still standing where Croix left her, staring at the door.
"Do you have more exciting magic for us?"
She blinked, and the house was no more. Everything around her was blinding, and she was on stage again. She couldn't see anyone's faces from the audience, just white blank eyes in the distance.
"Please stop…" She whispered, as her hair started to turn white.
Her lips quivered, and her eyes looked around in panic, trying to find an exit. She took a step back, then bumped into something. That 'something' started tugging at her clothes, and she slowly turned to look at it.
There stood a girl, with a blank face. No eyes, no mouth, not even a nose. There was nothing. A void.
Chariot couldn't even scream as tears started to build up in her eyes.
"Shiny Chariot…" The kid started. "Why did you-" The girl continued talking but the redhead could no longer hear the rest as a loud static noise took over.
She grasped her head in pain, feeling like her eardrums were about to explode.
She started running and running, pushing people away, not daring to look at their faces. No matter how long or how far she ran she was stuck in the same place, like a loop she would find herself back to that stage.
"How could you?" She turned, and gasped when this time she saw Croix standing behind her, looking at her with nothing but fear and disappointment. "Monster."
-Colors-
Croix flew through the leylines at a slow pace, still not ready to interact with anyone at Luna Nova. It wasn't that she hated people there, and they were a lot better than the pricks at the magic department.
The professors can be a little too much for her at times, and especially now since she has been exhausted the past few weeks.
She hoped that Chariot didn't notice how tired she was. Normally, Croix would take the opportunity to sleep in at morning, but she was excited about showing her friend around.
Perhaps she could take a few days off, take it easy now that her job of getting her out the tower is done and it would be easier to 'watch over' her if they're both at home.
She decided she would think about this later, after she meets up with the headmistress.
Was it about Chariot? Was she going to drop a hint on what happened years ago with the ex-performer?
She had no idea, so she prepared herself to whatever unexpected thing the strange woman could throw at her.
"I want you to teach at Luna Nova."
Well, anything except for this.
The lilac haired witch walked through the school, but at a fast pace so that the students won't notice her and make the connection between her and that ugly photo the school took years ago when she won the broom relay. She made it to Holbrooke's office in no time, and took a seat as she greeted her with her motherly smile.
However, now that she told her what she was here for, Croix noticed the playful spark in her eyes, and she felt like a fool for whatever reason.
"Headmistress, this isn't one of your pranks again is it?" Croix asked, unimpressed, while the woman giggled.
If it were anyone but Miranda, she would have taken them seriously. No offense to her, she was and still is a powerful witch. The problem was that she was rather childish at times, still clinging to her youth whenever she could.
It was admirable, really… If it weren't for the fact that younger witch was dying to catch up on sleep and felt like this was the worst prank anyone could pull on her at the moment.
"I am serious!" Miranda chuckled, much to Croix's dismay and confusion. "I was thinking that the school needs to move on. We can't live with tradition forever, so why not introduce your modern magic to the students? I'm sure that with this generation, they will find magic more entertaining."
"Oh my God, you're actually serious." Croix's eyes went wide and she ran a hand through her hair.
This was an opportunity for her to spread the knowledge she had, the ideals and view on magic that most witches did not share with her. She could help create a new generation of magic, but… She was exhausted.
She already had a lot of stuff on her plate, and it was hard balancing her life.
She wasn't even sure if she would be cut out to be a professor.
"Take your time and think about it. I know you're already busy, and with Chariot living with you now, I believe you have a lot more on your plate." She said, then smiled softly. "Thank you for taking care of her. I can't express how grateful I am for what you've done."
"Chariot is my friend. I'm glad to be of help." She said. "Why me though? There are other people who studied modern magic as well."
"Yes but they are rare, and did not go as far as you did." Holbrooke said, smiling. "I trust you the most, besides, there is someone you might want to meet." She said, and the younger witch raised an eyebrow at her.
The two walked outside and stared at two girls sitting together. One of them had striking blue eyes, and looked a bit uptight, while the other, who was sleeping against her shoulder, was a brunette who looked rather peacefully.
Croix recognized the first one as the heiress to the Cavendish family. They all had the same hair somehow…
She looked down at the headmistress, who gave her a somber look.
"These two are childhood friends. I was told they met at a Shiny Chariot show." She said, surprising the other witch. "The last Shiny Chariot show. They've never spoken of it, in fact, Miss Cavendish looks rather angry whenever Miss Kagari brings it up."
"Do you think they know?" Croix asked, forgetting about all of her exhaustion from earlier, and now thinking of all the possibilities this seemed to create. "Wouldn't their memories of the event be erased?"
"It is possible that they could have overlooked the children… Or perhaps, they didn't want to mess with a descendant of a Nine Olde Witch." Miranda explained with a heavy sigh. "They are not fair, you know. There are a lot of flaws in the whole system. You can tell by how they treated poor Chariot, and how they would hide the truth from everyone, but not dare to mess with an important family."
"I'll take the job." Croix said immediately, and she didn't leave time for the headmistress to process her words. "If I can find out from them what happened, then I'll take the job."
"You… you are very determinant about helping my daughter, aren't you?" The old woman smiled. She wondered how things would have been if they had been friends before this, if they had met back when none of them had to experience loneliness. She didn't wait for an answer. "All preparations are ready. You can contact me once you have enough time to teach."
Croix nodded with a smile, then remembered something.
"Oh, headmistress? I think I have a way for you to contact Chariot without having to meet her." She said, and the headmistress could only stare in surprise.
-Colors-
The lilac haired witch yawned as she flew on her broom. She was too busy talking about preparations and other stuff that she forgot to check her phone.
She received a couple of messages from Marjolaine. She groaned, before checking them. She was in need of a nap and the last thing she needed was a headache.
Marjo: Hello hot stuff!
Croix almost gave up the will to live, reading that, but then she read some of the other messages, and one of them made her face go pale.
Marjo: Croix, I can't reach Chariot, and I can't go to your house at the moment. Please tell me she's okay, it's been hours.
Her heart started racing, and so did her mind, going through hundreds of possibilities as she ignored how tired she was and flew at full speed towards her apartment.
She shouldn't have left her alone, at least not so soon.
Anything could have happened to her, and it would be all because the lilac haired witch couldn't think of a better alternative.
For the first time in her life, Croix was terrified for someone.
She rushed through the building, and looked around. Chariot was nowhere to be seen. She hesitated, not knowing if she should search each room like crazy, or try to be slow and careful so she wouldn't alarm her.
"Chariot? Where are you?" She tried calling her, but she received no response.
Croix made her way through some of the rooms, starting with the bathroom. People lock themselves there when they are upset, right?
She wouldn't know, but she heard that some do.
She then moved to the redhead's room, and found nothing. She looked through every other room, rushing due to fear and anxiety, until she finally reached her own. It was more of an office than a room since she only used it to work and not rest, but fortunately, it seemed like the place worked as a safe room to someone else.
She looked puzzled, and slightly alarmed at the sight of a white haired woman sitting on her bed with her arms around her legs to keep them close to her chest. Her face was buried, making it hard for her to figure out who this stranger is.
After a moment of confusion, it clicked.
She has seen Chariot's hair turn white once, but not to this extent.
White was the color that her hair would change to when under an overwhelming pressure caused by anxiety.
Feeling her heart sink, she walked slowly towards her friend but wasn't sure how to approach her. Should she call her name? No, she didn't respond earlier. Should she touch her? That could startle her, no?
She decided to go with the latter, because at least that could get her a response.
She gently put her hand on her shoulder, shaking it. The white haired woman looked up at her, with empty eyes, devoid of the light that usually resided there. She looked at Croix in surprise, but it seemed like her mind was somewhere else.
"You're not real." She simply said, and the emerald eyed witch felt slightly hurt, but she couldn't blame her.
It looks like Chariot was stuck in her own head, so much that she couldn't tell the difference between what's real and what's not.
"It's me, Chariot. I'm real." She said, softly, but she couldn't stop her worry from slipping into her tone. She moved closer, but the younger witch only pulled away, not daring to look at her. "I'm Croix, your friend. You don't have to be scared of me."
She hesitated, but then placed a hand on Chariot's cheek, slowly turning her head towards her. The light in her eyes slowly came back, as the older witch smiled softly at her.
"Croix?" She whispered.
Croix's smile turned pained, and she leaned down, pulling her into her arms. She felt the tense witch start to relax at the familiar warmth, and hug back, clutching into the fabric of her clothes as if her life depended on it.
"I'm sorry I left you on your own." The lilac haired witch apologized, and the two remained like that for what felt like hours.
A while later, Croix leaned against the bathroom door, not wanting to leave her friend for even a minute, which Chariot appreciated but thought was silly nonetheless.
"I am fine Croix! You can stop leaning against the door." Chariot said, as she ran a hand through her hair, letting the water clean her both physically and emotionally.
Once she snapped out of it, she felt gross, and wanted to shower.
She never got this bad, at least not after her first year of isolation. She leaned against the wall, before slowly slipping down and closing her eyes.
She was trapped either way, wasn't she?
"If I call for you and you don't answer I'm coming in, okay?" Croix said from behind the door, and Chariot rolled her eyes.
"I'm fine! I can't shower if you keep standing there!"
"But…!" Croix started, then sighed in defeat. "I'm still walking in if something happens, okay?" She said, then moved away from the door.
Chariot smiled slightly, before going back to her own thoughts, finding comfort in the pitter pattering of the water, and the feeling of it against her skin.
She felt the sounds coming back, the voices calling back for her, and she hugged herself, gripping her arms tightly. Her vision was still clear, she was still in the shower, but she just couldn't focus on anything.
It took her a few times to hear Croix's voice, and fortunately, she responded before the lilac haired witch would barge in.
She wrapped a towel around herself and opened the door, only to be met with Croix, about to knock again. The lilac haired witch was staring at her with intensity. Chariot gripped the towel tighter, holding into place.
"Are you okay?" Croix asked, oblivious to her friend's slight discomfort and embarrassment.
"Can I get dressed first?" Chariot asked, and only then did Croix become aware of the lack of clothing on the other woman.
"Oh…" She took a step back and looked away.
She walked to the kitchen, while the younger witch left to her room. She poured two cups, one of tea, the other of coffee. She placed them on the small table in the living room, and sat on the couch thinking of what happened today.
She picked her phone and decided to text the rockstar.
Croix: Hey, she's okay, I think.
Marjo: Oh thank God…
Marjo: Wait, what do you mean you think?
Croix: Well, she has white hair.
Croix was typing her next text, but before she could finish it, the other woman was already calling her. She answered, only to have her yell into her ear.
"WHAT ON EARTH HAPPENED MERIDIES?!" Croix winced, literally feeling pain in her ear. She touched it to check if her ear drum was gone and if she was bleeding.
"I don't know. She was like that when I came home." She said, rubbing her ear and switching the phone to the other one. "And can you not yell? I need these ears."
"I can't come over today, but please take care of her. Keep me updated." Marjolaine said with concern, and the lilac haired witch wished she had any words to comfort her, but right now she couldn't even comfort herself.
"I will." She said, and the call ended.
She turned and saw Chariot heading towards her, before sitting next to her.
"I made you some tea." The lilac haired witch said, and frowned at how unresponsive her friend was. She placed a hand on her shoulder, but felt hurt when it resulted in her flinching. "I'm sorry."
Chariot who has been distracted the whole time, realized what just happened, and her eyes widened as guilt took over.
"I didn't mean to! I'm sorry!" She said, biting her lip. She took the cup in her hands, and managed to give her a small smile. "Thank you."
The two sat in uncomfortable silence for the first time ever, and it kept them both at edge. Chariot was too tired, and too distracted to say anything, while Croix was too worried and confused to know how to act.
"How are you feeling?" She asked, but Chariot could only sigh.
"I don't think I have a good answer to that." She admitted, and took a sip from her cup. She however, smiled after that. "Thank you, for always looking out for me." Croix smiled back, but she couldn't hide the worry and guilt in her eyes.
"What else are friends for?" She looked down, and wondered if she should show her what she had for her or not.
Before she could though, Chariot spoke again.
"Can I stay in your room while you work? I feel more comfortable there." She asked, and there was finally more color to her face, and the tips of her hair reddened a bit, but were still outpowered by white.
Croix was surprised. She wasn't sure she would be comfortable with someone else in her room while she worked and messed around with circuits, but… perhaps she could make an exception for Chariot, especially when she was feeling this way.
Chariot didn't want to say it out loud, but when she was out of it, she must have subconsciously went to that room because it had Croix's smell.
...How embarrassing, but it's not like there was someone else she was comfortable with on that level. After all, she was the only person she's had any kind of close contact with since forever, and she certainly spent more time with her than with her best friend for the past few years.
"Sure. You can sit on my bed while I work on the desk, okay?"
"Okay." Chariot smiled.
That was how they found themselves hanging out in a messy room with cables everywhere and a few cup of ramens that they ate for dinner.
They both needed to learn how to cook…
Chariot had earphones on that Croix gave to her, and she listened to the music she downloaded for her, telling her that it could help her relax.
She was right, it did.
Her hair started to regain color, slowly. She kept thinking about what she saw, and about the nightmares she has always had.
Would it really be worth it to remember everything? To find out what she has done?
"I don't know if remembering what happen is for the best." She blurted out her thought process.
Croix has been working on some blueprints for the past half hour, and turned to her in surprise, taking a few more seconds to register what she just heard.
"I mean… I want to remember, but the nightmares I have and the things I see… If my brain is repressing those memories to protect me, should I really dig into them?" She continued, and hugged herself.
The lilac haired witch studied her for a moment. They haven't exchanged many words since they came to this room, and now they were talking about this. She felt helpless, not knowing what she could do to help.
Chariot wasn't some equation with a simple solution that she could get to after a lot of thinking.
She was like a maze that she finds herself lost in, unable to find the exit, unable to find the answer to the question or the puzzle…
Chariot was human, and humans were complicated.
There are no easy fixes, or quick solutions, only thousands of steps and a non linear path to heal.
So Croix found herself at a loss of words, unable to give her an answer.
"I'm sorry, I don't know." She admitted in defeat, then gave her a determined look. "Whatever you decide, I'll be there for you though."
The red eyed witch stared at her, with a warm look that could make ice thaw.
"You're amazing, you know that?" She said, then realization sank in and she yelped and turned away blushing. "These… these songs a-are amazing, where did you get them from?" She said, trying to escape the situation, but instead let out another yelp when she felt the lilac haired witch sit next to her on the bed.
Her hair was shining red again.
"You're the amazing one, you dork." Croix said with a straight face, but if Chariot were to look at her, she would find a blush that could match with her own hair.
Thanks to that, the awkwardness between them was gone.
"Headmistress Holbrooke offered me to work at Luna Nova today." She said, and the redhead looked at her in surprise. "I think I'll take the job."
"Really?" Chariot said, then gave her shoulder a small nudge. "I think you would make a great professor."
"Yeah, right." Croix rolled her eyes, then pulled up her own phone, handing it to Chariot. "Click on this video." She said with a smile, and while a little suspicious, the redhead did click on it.
The video was a recording of Miranda Holbrooke, her mother, and seeing her face for the first time in years put her into tears faster than anything could ever do.
She looked the same, nothing has changed. Her eyes and smile still radiated warmth and love.
"Headmistress, it's recording." She heard Croix's voice, who was recording the video at the time.
"Oh! Hello my dear Chariot!" She waved at the camera, then looked at the person behind it, as if not sure if she was doing it right. She then looked back at 'her'. "It's been so long, I am happy that you are near now. I wish I could come and see you, but I'm forbidden from doing so, however, I know that we will see each other again soon. I am always proud of you, and I love you. You and Croix take care of each other, okay?" She looked like she wanted to say more, much more, but it seemed like her feelings could not be conveyed through words alone. Her smile and voice turned a bit somber near the end, and she waved at her again.
The video ended.
Chariot was sobbing.
She looked at Croix-tears in her eyes, but a smile on her face- then rested her head on her shoulder, whispering a 'thank you'.
Croix finally felt at ease now that the red was back to her hair, and now that her friend was feeling a lot better. She was hesitant at first, but then moved her arm to hold her by the waist, and rested her head on hers.
At some point, she put the other earphone in her ear, listening to the music with her, and then hours later-she wasn't sure if it was her or Chariot who pulled the blanket over them- they slept in that position, too exhausted from the day, but at least had each other's company.