Starting a 36 hour shift on the Whambulance right now so...I should have some time to write among all that!
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Whinny eagerly watched the horizon, bouncing on her tip toes and snapping her fingers to a rhythm only she could hear. Sasha leaned against the railing of the front porch and kept her eyes trained on the farthest point of the road she could see.
"Ugh, shouldn't they be back by now?" Whinny asked as she started to chew on her thumbnail.
"They'll be back, don't worry," Sasha commented, her voice dull but her eyes bright as she watched for Connie.
"Well they sure are taking their sweet time..." Whinny kicked at the dirt of the walkway.
"THERE!" Sasha's sudden screech made Whinny miss her kick at the ground and she almost fell over. She caught herself and ran up to the porch to stand beside Sasha and get a good look. Sure enough, four horses and their riders appeared down the road, heading in their direction at an easy walk.
"Let's go meet up with them!" Whinny suggested gleefully and, without waiting for Sasha, she ran to the stables and reappeared moments later with their horses in tow. She led them up to the porch so she could jump on barebacked and Sasha followed suit. They took off at a gallop, kicking up dust in their wake as they charged down the road to meet their returning squad mates.
"Hey, Sasha!" Connie's excited yell sounded across the divide and he kicked his horse into a canter to meet them early. He leaned over as he came up to Sasha's side and gave her a quick kiss before glancing over his shoulder to make sure it remained a secret...except for Whinny who was just smiling at them with a glint in her eye.
"You two are freaking precious," she said with a shake of her head, "Hey, Squad Leader, how did the meeting go? Are we getting this party started or what?"
Jean grinned, happy to be back with his entire squad...he felt better to be able to see them all in one place. He hated to have to split up like this because how could he protect them if they were all over the map? He couldn't imagine a world without Whinny's giant grin, Sasha's crumb speckled smile, Connie's mischievous laugh, Armin's wise eyes taking in the antics of his team, Phillip's bored expression even though his eyes held a glint of interest...this was his squad, this was his family.
"The Garrison has agreed to the plans," Armin announced since Jean was too busy happily observing everyone, "We're free to start as soon as Erwin gives the go-ahead."
"That's great!" Sasha commented, "Jean, do you think it's going to be a relatively safe mission?"
"No."
Jean's simple and grim reply made them all drop their smiles and look at their leader with concern.
"What?" Jean asked with a serious look that he sent around the entire group, "When is dealing with Titans EVER safe? People are probably going to die over this."
"Geez, man," Connie mumbled, picking nervously at the leather of his reigns, "We...we know it's dangerous but...we aren't supposed to engage the Titans unless we have to, right?"
"Wrong," Jean looked at Connie in disbelief, "Did none of you pay attention in the strategy meetings?"
Armin looked extremely nervous, he had been in charge of explaining the plans and he felt like he'd failed miserably to do so.
"I paid attention," Sasha assured him, "But it didn't sound that dangerous to me. We guard the workers, right."
"Yes, but the wall won't be enclosed," Phillip's quiet, glum voice made everyone turn their heads to look at him, "Titans could come from any direction and the Scouts are responsible for keeping them away from the new Walls. Basically it's like being outside the Walls on a mission...only the mission is to fight Titans, not avoid them and gather info."
"So we face them head on? No diversion tactics?" Connie looked shocked.
"Exactly," Armin stated simply, "There will be a lot of workers in one place, Titans will be swarming to them like flies to a carcass."
"What a lovely image, Armin," Whinny scrunched her nose.
"Sorry," Armin apologized with a blush, "But the thing is...we have to face them long before they reach the new Walls. The Garrison soldiers will be positioned closer to the workers and along Wall Rose as our backup...but we are the front line of defense."
This revelation sobered the entire mood of the regrouping and they began the ride back to the base in silence...but Whinny would have none of it.
"Come on, guys, buck up!" she said with as much cheer as she could muster, "We're Squad 78! We're going to do this together and we'll kick those Titans in the asses! Right, sir?"
She looked expectantly at Jean, her eyes begging him silently to back her up.
"Right," he said with as much enthusiasm as he could manage, "Whinny's right. We can do this, guys...we've been through worse together and we've always come out on top."
Sasha, Connie and Armin nodded resolutely, a spark of hope alighting in their eyes again at his words. Phillip just looked around at them all and he remained silent and thoughtful.
When they reached their base, Jean was surprised to see a figure waiting for them on the porch. He recognized her as he got closer, it was Sigrid!
"Connie, please take Buschwald to the stable with you?" he asked as he quickly dismounted and handed his horse's reins to his short comrade. Connie nodded and led both of their horses away. "Sigrid, good to see you again. How are you doing on the farm?"
"Everything's going very well," Sigrid said graciously, "Thank you for asking...but that's not why I'm here."
Jean nodded for her to follow him inside and he gallantly pulled a chair away from the table for her to take a seat and then he sat down next to her and turned his chair to face hers.
"Is there a problem?" he asked seriously, seeing the troubled look in her cornflower colored eyes...very pretty eyes...the opposite end of the spectrum from Mikasa's dark, almost black, eyes.
Sigrid took a deep breath and looked down at the floor.
"It's...it's really foolish...but I wanted to talk to someone who knows first-hand about this stuff," she said sadly, sounding resigned, "My best friend, basically my sister, she is joining the Cadets in a few weeks."
"And you don't want her to?" Jean guessed from her downcast demeanor that he was right in assuming this.
"I just...I just want to know what she's going to have to go through," Sigrid admitted quietly, "What's it going to be like for her? She's so determined to join the Garrison regiment."
"At least she isn't looking to join the Scouts," Jean offered with a wry laugh, Sigrid looked at him with a pained expression.
"You've seen Titans, right?" she whispered, her eyes getting wider.
"Yeah," Jean glanced over at the table, avoiding her eyes, "I've seen a lot of them."
"But you're so young," Sigrid pointed out, "How have you seen so much already?"
Jean chuckled nervously and ran his hand along the back of his neck.
"Let's just say the 104th was an unlucky year to be a Cadet," he said grimly, "The day we graduated was the day Trost was attacked and we were stationed there on cannon duty for our final assignment before the closing ceremony. And...I was a member of the Scouts Special Operations Squad under Captain Levi...do you know who I mean?"
"Of course," Sigrid nodded, "Everyone knows of him."
"Well, we took the lead in the uprising against the King," Jean found himself admitting for some reason, "Suffice it to say, yes, I've seen plenty. So...you want to know what the training is like?"
"I just want to know what she's getting herself into," Sigrid sighed.
Jean sat back and began recounting the steps of training as a Cadet to the best of his memory. Shardis' breakdown of the troops, the balancing tests, the long runs in all types of weather to build stamina, the ODM lectures and the actual ODM training, the classes on the knowledge of Titans...
"Sounds like a hard life," Sigrid commented when he finished his recollections, "I would never be able to do it. I'm too weak."
Jean eyed her quietly for a moment, taking in the strength that was obvious in her arms.
"You don't look weak," he commented and then he looked away with a blush, "I mean, you look like you're not shy of hard work."
"I'm not," Sigrid assured him, "I can plow a field, hoe rows, pick vegetables and pull weeds all day long...but I don't think I could ever swing through the air like you guys do, like it's nothing different than walking. I could never face a Titan."
"I'd say it takes a different kind of strength to do what you do," Jean said honestly, "Just because you can't swing a sword doesn't make you less than a soldier who doesn't know the first thing to do with a plow."
Sigrid raised her eyes from where they had been focused on a knot in the wood of the table and they were filled with something akin to hope.
"Do...do you really think so?" she whispered.
"Y...yeah, I do," Jean assured her, realizing he'd somehow struck the correct chord.
"I...when Kasia said she was leaving and joining the Cadets...I started to think maybe I was being selfish because I don't want to be in the military," she admitted quietly, "Kasia seems to think it's the most important thing in the world and that staying on the farm is pointless for her...but to me the farm is everything. My farm means dozens of children will be able to eat this winter who wouldn't if it didn't exist."
"Exactly," Jean reached out before he even thought through what he was doing and laid a hand on her arm in comfort, "There are different kinds of strength...different types of bravery. Some of us fight...some of us provide...some of us keep the peace...we all have parts to play, yeah?"
"Life can't run on one type of person," Sigrid agreed, nodding gently, "I'm just afraid for her...what if she...get's..."
"Stop it," Jean didn't mean for his voice to be so harsh, but he had to make her stop and put it in perspective, "She wants to do this, right? It's her goal? Well then you should know there is nothing you can do to stop her."
"I know...and that's what makes this so hard," Sigrid's voice was strained and so quiet that it made Jean's heart squeeze uncomfortably...memories of his mother's face with just this same expression flooded over his mind, the day he'd told her he was joining the Cadets. "I don't want to lose her."
Jean nodded in understanding, remembering how he'd felt when he saw his squad all together...the need to protect them and keep them close.
"Sometimes all we can do is trust that our friends can take care of themselves when we can't be there with them," he told her honestly, "I feel the same way every time we go out on a Recon mission. I can't keep my eyes on them at all times...I have to trust their own strength and their own willpower. Kasia sounds like she knows herself well. The Garrison will be lucky to gain her as a member."
"I'm...sorry for whining to you about this," Sigrid sighed, "I just...didn't know who to talk to."
"Hey, we're in this together as far as I'm concerned," Jean assured her, "You're the brains behind this idea, after all."
Sigrid seemed to brighten at his words and she smiled slightly.
"You're something special, Jean Kirschstein," she said, "I knew as soon as I saw you, you were different than the rest."
"The rest?" Jean asked, his eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"Yeah...you took the time to listen to a poor farm girl and thought that maybe she isn't worthless," Sigrid explained, "You were the only one who saw the truth of what I had to offer. Now it's about to happen...we're going to take back this land!"
Jean smiled at her, a genuine smile.
"Yeah," he agreed quietly, "Yeah, we will."
"JEAN!" Sasha came barreling dramatically through the door and collapsed onto his lap, looking up at him pitifully, "Can we please have dinner now? Whinny made me wait until you guys got back and I'm STARVING!"
The serious tension in the room was broken and Sigrid began to laugh, Whinny and Connie came flying into the building together and they almost got caught in the doorway together in their haste. Phillip and Armin followed a little more slowly, talking to eachother like old friends.
"I beat you, Springer! Fair and square!" Whinny exclaimed, pumping her fist in the air.
"Like hell you did, Godfrey!" Connie demanded, "I beat you and you know it! Sasha, who reached the door first?"
Sasha groaned and slid off of Jean and onto the floor. At this point, Sigrid was laughing so hard that the whole room rang with the sound of her amusement...and Jean realized he very much liked the sound of it.
"Hello? Who is this?" Armin asked when he and Phillip came inside.
"This is Sigrid, the girl who presented the idea for expansion," Jean introduced the two strategy geniuses, "This is Armin, my second in command and a brilliant tactician."
"Are you in charge of the plans then?" Sigrid asked, her eyes lit up with excitement and when Armin nodded she grabbed his arm and squealed. "Oh, please, Armin, tell me all about it!"
Armin gladly sat down and the two of them dove headlong into a conversation about the length and width of the wall and the land the plan encompassed with the first section and all the other logistical stuff. Jean shook his head with a smile.
Sasha, Connie and Whinny were already chopping peppers and filleting fish and boiling water for potatoes. Phillip sat in a chair across the table from Jean and kicked his legs out in front him, crossing his arms over his chest as his face took on his default bored expression.
"Phillip, how about you get off your moping ass and help us cook?" Whinny called over her shoulder, her hazel eyes fixing him in a teasing glare.
Phillip sighed and stood up without any sort of complaint and joined the others at the stove.
"What the hell do I do?" he asked.
"Skin these!" Sasha thrust a potato into his hand and then a knife. Phillip scowled at the tuber in his hand but he started peeling in silence much to Jean's surprise...and then to his even bigger surprise, the cranky brown haired boy smiled slightly at Whinny's back.
Jean scrunched his eyebrows together as he studied the situation for a moment...sure enough, Whinny was sneaking glances at Phillip and he was sneaking them right back. Oh, hell.
If Phillip dragged Whinny down, Jean was going to beat the shit out of him.
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Gah, my back is killing me so I am going to stop writing now and get some sleep. Because it's 1 AM and I have a whole 28 hours of work left...ugh.