The Devil's Innocent Soul: 10
Joseph being the touchy feely person that he was didn't find anything wrong with standing there and hugging me, but I soon felt heat rising in my face and I stepped away. He let his arms fall to his sides and motioned me towards the table.
"The Finders left you clothes, I can step out for a moment and you can change." He said spinning around me and out the door. I watched as he closed the door and I creeped towards the table wearily. I take the cloths resting on the table in my hands and run it across my fingers. It's a white cotton shirt, basic and form fitting by the look of it, and softer then cotton normally is. I let the blankets fall to my feet and untie the inane hospital dress from around my neck. Naked, I stand there and absentmindedly dressing while thinking about what I was going to tell Joseph. After a moment I decided to just tell him everything, a small act of petty defiance to the over secretive Order.
Once dressed in the white shirt and some type of thermal pants, I open the door to allow Joseph back in.
"So what job did they talk you into getting." I asked taking a seat by his at the conference table.
"I actually talked them into giving it to me. At first they were very insistent on keeping me ignorant on everything that was going on and they have a very heated discussion about how I was to be dealt with. Emmet, believe it or not, was the one that convinced them they couldn't just kick me out of the Order right then and there. Once he managed that I stepped in and asked if I could work here. I thought I'd be able to both learn more about all of this and I could meet back up with you later."
"How did you know I wasn't just going to come back and leave?" I wonder out loud.
"They made it very clear that wasn't exactly a option for you." He said darkly, a frightening expression pealing on his face. But as fast as it appeared, it was gone and his face relaxed, "Anyway, I discussed it with Emmet for awhile and landed a job as a Finder."
"You're going to be a Finder? Like Roxanna and Emmet?"
"Essentially." He confirmed.
"Oh." I murmured and wondered what I thought about that. "What do Finders do other then stalk Accommodators?"
"All sorts of dog work for the Order. Search, protect, and find Innocence." He shrugged, "Which might be easier if I knew what Innocence was."
I keep silent for a moment, not sure if I wanted to start explaining things now. Joseph opened his mouth again, "They told me I'd be told everything once I was officially made a Finder. I didn't have time to drive the information out of them because they all sort of dispersed and went to their different jobs leaving me here to wait for you." He turned to me and raised his eyes. "Which leaves your story which I'm certain is just a wealth of information."
"Hardly. I don't think I understood half of what they told me." I pressed my palm into my forehead. "You'd have been a better choice to go and hear it all." We sat there for a good hour as I recounted all the events that had transpired since we split up. I told him of the tour I had of the Order, Lenalee, the Science Division, Apollo, Fey, Komui, the Order, Innocence, Noah, the Millennium Earl, and Hevlaska. I hesitated before I started to explain my Innocence because something in my chest tried to hold me back. The feeling that if I said it out loud, I was accepting it.
"Once we made it back to Komui's office, it was pretty much explained to me that I didn't have any say in the matter. I sort of just gave in and told him I'd be a Exorcist." And I hear my voice quiver at the last word and I cough to dispel it. Sadly, Joseph is too good at picking up subtle thing like that.
"I can see why you needed the hug." He said, sympathy leaking out from his mouth. For some reason, it irritates me and I turn to glare at him.
"I was just fine thank you." He holds up his hand in surrender and I sigh and apologize. "Sorry, I didn't mean…"
"It's alright." His face turns thoughtful as he studies the tabletop, "So this Earl guy wants to destroy the world using his soul sucking Akuma?"
"Seems so." I murmur, picking at my nail. Something about the idea makes creases form between his eyes. At first I think it's because it's so horrible, like when I had sit down when Komui told me. "It's terrible…"
"Indeed." He says but his expression doesn't change at all, like he didn't even register my comment.
"What's wrong?" I asked but he just shakes his head.
"Nothing important at the moment. Tell me more about your Innocence."
"I don't know more. I have Innocence but Hevlaska and Komui said it exists in a different dimension or something. It's what makes me heal. That's all." I shift a bit awkwardly, thinking about how the same thing that makes Lenalee's blood come to life is inside me. I shiver in my warm clothes.
"Which reminds me." He said sitting up straighter, "I never got to thank you."
This confused me, "Thank me? What did I do that needs thanks?"
"You," he began, "saved my life."
Oh. "Joseph, I didn't save your life I gave you that scar." I say shrinking into my seat.
"I distinctly remember the lion giving me the scar." Was it just me or did he sound self conscious?
"You would have never even met that forsaken lion had I not ran to it like a careless child." I retorted.
"I chose to follow you. If it's anyone's fault, it's my own."
"But it was me that you followed and you trusted me not to get you hurt."
"You're wrong Sara, it's not your fault." He reasons and I shake my head in disagreement. "How could you have possibly known about the lion?" He asked, thinking he had me on this one.
"It was a Akuma, I should have known he was there." Which was true and Joseph had to think about his next response.
"But you didn't and you couldn't control that. It was just an unfortunate turn of events. I was just unlucky." He says in a final sort of way. Then he takes a breath, "Had you not been there I would have gotten a lot worse than a simple scar, I may have had injuries like yours." His eyes glance at my stomach and then back to my face, "So thank you, for keeping me alive."
I neither denied nor accepted his thanks because I knew I didn't deserve it but I also knew I wasn't going to win that argument.
"A Exorcist and a Finder." I murmur, "Funny, a few days ago my only concern was that my journal was stolen."
We left the conference room when a Finder came to claim use. The Finder didn't say much to either of us but instead quickly rushed us forward and down various halls until we reached a door. The Finder stopped and introduced Joseph to his room. He told Joseph where the cafeteria is and how to get there from where we stood. He then weaved me through more hall ways, so many that at this point I was sure this Order consisted of only hallways, and stopped in front of yet another door. My room.
"The cafeteria is right down this path and to the right. You should get something to eat, tomorrow is your physical."
"What happens at the physical?"
He looks at me for a moment and attempts a smile, "Basic physical tests, not to worry. Nothing painful." Then he rushes away.
Once I open the door an extreme exhaustion dawns on me and I feel all the effects of my near death experience yesterday and the various traumatic things this Order was pilling on top of me. I stumble in and collapse on the white sheet bed and I sink into it. The feeling was bliss and I rolled onto my back to survey the room. Through lazy eyes I see a room deck out with metal furniture, the bed frame a maze of metal bars and the desk against the wall matching the design. Across pure white wall generic pictures hang, most depicting some sort of spiritual symbol like moons and angels. Other than that the room was empty, waiting for its recipient to occupy it. I wondered if I'd ever fill it. I had no possessions and no real desire to decorate.
Across the room the wall held three doors, two being what I could only assume were a bathroom and a closet, but the third was a mystery. Not that my mind was all the caring at that moment. I was mentally having a war with myself to decide whether going to the cafeteria to gorge on food was worth getting out of this masterpiece of a bed. I sigh and buried my face into a fluffy pillow and breath and large deep breath. I closed my eyes and burrowed under the blankets. Maybe this Order wouldn't be all that bad anyway. Free bed. Free food.
I stopped myself there and chiding myself for getting my hopes up. I fell to sleep.
I woke up when the sky view from the window over my bed was pitch black. A clock over the door told me it was three AM. I rubbed my eyes and wondered what woke me up. The answer came in a monstrous noise coming from my stomach. I frowned, knowing a cafeteria would never be open this late at night. None the less, I roll out of bed and get to my feet, curling my toes in the carpet and yawning. I walked from my room bare foot and head in the direction the Finder pointed out to me.
I turned out that the cafeteria was open, and a few people were actually eating. The cafeteria was a large open room of neatly floored tiles and long black tables all in position on the floor. A large chandelier, consisting of crystals and glittering lights, was hung up close to the ceiling that towered more the three stories above me. Across the room from the entrance an opening in the wall revealed the interior of a kitchen and a man moving around inside. Only two scientists with extremely dark circles around there eyes and a twitchy looking girl ate now.
I pause for a second and then make my way across the cold tile to the opening in the wall. The man behind the window had rich olive colored skin and dreadlocks running down the back of his head and neck. His ear held a large purple ring and black cuffs circled his forearms. He was wearing a chef's apron tied around his waist and dark sunglasses shielding his eyes. I wondered why he'd need sunglasses when we're inside in the middle of the night but it was none of my business.
"Uh…" I cleared my throat and the man saw that I was there, "Is this where I can get something to eat?"
"Oh Honey! You must be the new Exorcist Roxanna was talking about! Such lovely eyes!" the eccentric man merrily chattered. My face flushed brightly from both surprise, my heart skipping a beat from his powerful voice, and the compliment. "So you're hungry? Well, just tell me what you'd like and I whip it right up for you!"
"Oh, um… anything?" I asked, finding the conversation strangely familiar.
"That's right Honey!" he gave a goofy smile which looked strange on this mountain of a man. Still, he seemed kind enough.
"Then, can you make Coq au Vin?" I asked and the man smiles.
"Are you from France or just a fan of French cuisine? Of course I can make it for you!"
"Yea, I'm French." I said, considering it was easier then explaining that I didn't know, "Also could you…" I felt my face get a dark red color, "make 15 or 16 servings?"
His grin freezes and he raises his eyebrows at me, "You sure a skinny little thing like you can handle that much?" he asks and I nod reassuringly. He thinks for a moment and then smiles, "Reminds me of Allen…"
"Allen?" I ask.
He gave a small smile, "An Exorcist like you. He's got quite the appetite and he's as thin as a bean sprout. Anyway, I'll get your Coq au Vin out to you in no time flat." He spun around and started working. I hesitate at the counter for a moment and then turn and scan for a place to sit. I begin walking toward a empty table in the corner of the room, but my eye caught the twitchy looking girl again and I slow down.
She's a mousy girl, thin features and shrunken in cheeks. Fiery red hair was pulled up in a louse bun that only managed to hold half of her chaotic mess. In thin hands she was attempting to hold a teacup, a small intricate thing, but every time she reached for it her hand would shake violently and miss their mark. I watched her feeble attempts for a few moments and then made my way over to her.
She didn't acknowledge me as I approached, just focused on her task at hand. I reached over toward her lifting her teacup and resting it in her fingers. She twisted her fingers around it and shakily pressed it against her lips taking a drink. She placed it down and turned she head to me.
"Rings in your ears. Gold. Aurum 79." She sputtered.
"What?" I blinked.
"Rings! Your ears!" She muttered.
"Oh." I said reaching at the rings looping through my ears, "Yes, rings."
"Pretty." She murmured and her bright green eyes sparked, "Michael liked Aurum. I like Aurum. Ego similis aurum."
"…what language is that?" I asked, not recognizing what she was saying.
"Latin. Latin is an Italic language originally spoken in Latium and Ancient Rome. Rome. Italy. Italy a democratic republic-"
"What's your name." I interrupted, seeing as she would probably keep speaking like that if I didn't stop her. Her thoughts seemed to be scattered, and it sounded as if she was simply blurting out everything she was thinking.
"Elizabeth Isabella Liard. Daughter of Marybeth and Gerald Liard. Sister to Michael and Jared Liard. Age 19. Place of origin Switzerland. Date of birth-"
"Take it easy Lizzy." I said soothingly offering her the teacup. She took it.
"Your name? Friendly girl. Rings in ears."
"Sara. I have no last name." I told her, watching her face contort in strange ways.
"Sara. Communication Access code for Sara and Joseph XCDD3T authorization accepted detail listed 555674. Roxanna and Emmet finders. Nice finders. They tell me nice things."
The access code stuff sounded something like what Roxanna had said when we had first arrived at the order. "You know Roxanna and Emmet?"
"Yes. Roxanna Harold and Emmet Night. Finder team 301. Nice team. Tell me nice things."
"What do you so here, at the Order?" I asked the girl wondering why they would have someone in her mental state working here.
"Elizabeth Liard. Finder team 73. Funeral. Cremation. Mother doesn't know yet. Mother won't know. Rest in peace Michael." She blurted out, tears running down her cheeks.
"Your brother?" I asked and then regretted it when I saw her tears, "Was he a Finder too?"
"Finder team 73. Six Exorcists dead, including finders, one hundred and forty eight confirmed deaths. Michael loved his finder friends. I loved Michael."
"One hundred and forty eight deaths?" I asked incredulously, "What happened?"
"I was there. Michael and I were there. Akuma were overwhelming. Go back Elizabeth! Go back! We're fine, no need for you to come. Michael said. Michael didn't want me to follow. I stayed behind. One hundred and forty eight deaths. Michael died."
"That's horrible." I murmured, and my chest hurt as I looked at the shaky girl. "Lizzy, what are you doing here? You've lost your brother. They should let you go back to your mother."
"I know things. I know many things. I've read nearly every file in the science department. I know many secrets. I can't leave. I know things."
"They aren't letting you go because you know about the Order and Innocence?"
"There are worse things then you know about. Terrible things. I've sworn myself to a Finder's loyalty and life. I live for the Order. I die for the Order. I keep secrets. I stay here."
"Elizabeth knows what she's doing." A voice from behind frightens me, but it's only Jerry with a cart holding a large cooking pot. "She has been like this since her brother died. Frightened out of her mind, poor thing. Smartest person I know though. She was aspiring to join the science division and read some of the off limits files in the library, then her brother died. Too much tragedy for her heart. The order can't even let her return home, the way she says everything she thinks of. Those files can't be told to every other person on the street." He mumbled and reached under his cart pulling up a teapot.
"More rose tea Elizabeth?" he asked Lizzy softly.
"Rose is the best." She said holding up here tea cup, "A Herbal tea made from real rose buds, plucked when they are young and then dried."
"Indeed." Jerry said smiling, "Do you like the new Exorcist Sara?"
"Sara, nice. Sara is very nice, helps me with tea. Pretty rings."
"Lovely eyes too." Jerry agreed and then turned towards me, "I haven't made Coq au Vin in awhile so I hope I did alright." He smiled and moved the giant pot to the table and handed me a bowl, silverware, and a ladle, and then he took his cart a wheeled it back to the kitchen.
I spoke to Lizzy some more as I began to work my way through my meal. The more we talked I saw how her hands didn't shack quite as much and her speech began to stay more on track and less fleetly. She told me about people. She seemed to be very fond of people. She talked about Michael, Emmet, Roxanna, Komui, Lenalee, Jerry, Komui, a boy named Lavi, and a lot of Finders of various names.
"So Lizzy." I said , finishing off my tenth bowl of Coq au Vin, "What do you know about innocence?"
"Many things. I've learned many things from years of being a Finder and I've read some things, Lots of things about Innocence."
"What about innocence that exists in a different dimension?" I ask with a vague hope she would know something.
"Innocence that exists in a different dimensional plane of existent connects with the soul of its Accommodator. Eris inter lucem et tenebras. Black bird. Black bird. Ravens are one of the more intelligent of bird species."
"Wait…slow down." I stopped her and put down my bowl. "Connected to my soul?"
"The Innocence residing in you is your soul. Is the foundation. The Essence. It's what makes up your soul." She frowned like those weren't the right words. "You are the Innocence."
"That doesn't make sense. I'm human, not some freaky cube thing."
"Innocence takes many forms." She sneezed and took a sip of her tea.
I shook my head and dispelled it from my mind. "What about that bit with the Raven. What did you mean by that?"
"…I don't think I deserve it… selflessness… find your way into my heart... All stars could be brighter... All hearts could be warmer…" she sang. A piercing pain shot through my body. A flame burned in my shoulder and stomach and my chest ache in some sort of yearning.
"Lizzy…" I mumbled, eyes wide staring at this redheaded girl, "Where did you hear that?"
"Mother used to sing to me. She can't sing now though. Mother can't sing to me ever again."
"What song is that?"
"No name. No name. Only words. Only song. Mothers sing it everywhere." She said, spinning a spoon through her tea. I looked at her for a long time, no longer wishing to speak. Had my mother sung that to me? Is it my memory of her that hurts my chest so much? Maybe, it seemed important. Not the song but the singer. The voice was important. Something…
"Where's your room Lizzy?" I asked, "I'd like to talk with you again sometime and I don't expect to be coming her at three AM ever again."
"I'll find you." She said shaking her head. "I like you. Nice girl. Pretty rings."
"I like you too." I told her and stood. "Be careful not to get yourself hurt."
"To late Sara." She said, "Too late for that."