Got Me Coming Undone

Part Two

2010

She sort of fell apart when Kevin Lynch broke up with her. It was right after he offered her a ring and she stuttered out "Can I...um....would it be okay if....uh....I think about it and get back to you?"

His male pride was wounded and more than that he saw in her eyes that even if she married him she didn't love him, even after all their time together, in the way he wanted her to. Like a love sick fool.

So he walked away. He told her she would never make a relationship work the way she was.

His parting words included "You're just too damaged."

For months she kept hearing those words in her head. Her bubbly personality faltered some but she tired to keep herself as cheery as she could at work. It was hard to hide how hurt she was around a bunch of profilers though. To their credit they all rallied around her- no one more so than Derek.

The winter drifted into the spring and she started to feel stronger. But she had decided she would never get into a serious relationship again. She wrote off the idea of marriage and kids. If she couldn't make it work with Kevin, someone just like her, then it was obvious she couldn't make it work with anyone.

Now she was reconsidering all that, as she sat at her computer in the BAU, and remembered what happened the night before with Derek.

They whole team went out for drinks. They were having a great time- laughing, joking and blowing off steam when a stranger walked over to their table. "Excuse me, I hate to interrupt, and believe me I rarely do anything like this...but would you like to dance?"

Everyone fell quiet.

Finally JJ said to Penelope "He's talking to you, Garcia," as she smirked.

"Me?" Penelope asked "You want to dance with me? I'm sorry but...no....I....well...I...um..."

How to say she felt uncomfortable in public places with people staring at her but she was sure he was a very nice man and if she wasn't planning to be celibate for life and didn't have a phobia of being mocked she would love to?

Derek, who had tensed up as soon as the guy walked over and focused on Penelope, moved closer and wrapped his arm around her back. "She's taken, man. Kindly back the hell off."

"Sorry. I didn't realize you two were together," the guy said and left.

"Aw," JJ said "he seemed sweet."

Derek said "He looked psychotic."

Emily asked "Is that your professional opinion?"

Rossi wasn't even bothering to try and hide his smirk. "He seemed all right to me. You sure you're not interested, Garcia?"

Penelope wondered "Was I too harsh? Maybe I should go apologize and dance with him? What could one dance hurt?"

Derek told her "He's fine. Leave it be. If you're dancing with anybody, baby, its gonna be me."

The possessive tone in his voice always sent shivers through her and she couldn't find the words to argue with him so she let him drag her out to the dance floor. After they had been dancing for a minute, and she was intoxicated on the smell of his cologne and the feel off his body against hers, he looked down into her eyes and murmured "We fit just right," before capturing her lips in their first real, passionate, romantic kiss.

He left her breathless and her head spinning. "What was that?"

His eyes searched hers. "Lets get out of here." Taking her hand he led her back to the table and they said good night to their friends, who were all smiling at them, having seen everything.

When they were in the parking lot, with Derek's arm around her waist, she looked at him and asked "Seriously, what's going on? Why did you kiss me? To make that guy back off? I think the look you gave him, handsome, did the job. The kiss was overkill."

"You think the first time I kissed you I would let be about anyone but us? That kiss happened because you looked damn good and I wanted to see if you tasted as good. If I was out of line...." Pain clouded his features as he moved away from her.

"Did I taste good, sweetness?"she flirted, pushing back all her own fears and doubts to give him what he needed in that moment.

He smiled. "Delicious, baby girl. I could get addicted to that mouth of yours."

They shared a pair of giddy smiles before she got in Esther and rolled down the window.

He asked "You okay to drive?"

"Do you think your kiss made me that off balance?" she teased. "I do feel a little dizzy but I can manage a motor vehicle. Besides I have a feeling I'm going to be buzzed for days so I'll have to learn to do many things under your spell."

He chuckled. "I know you can handle it, Goddess......Hey" his tone was turned soft and questioning "we're okay, right?"

"Sure!" She started the car and drove off. She had no idea what to think about what just happened and if it meant anything. Maybe they would never talk about it again.

Kissing him had heated her to her core. Her skin tingled. She would never forget this feeling. He was unlike any other man she had ever known. He was everything all rolled up in one.

And maybe....he wanted her? After all these wild years they spent as friends and all the ups and down, the almosts and the missed chances, the wrong turns and mistakes, the other people in their beds, could he really still look at her like he did on the day they met?

Like she was the best woman who ever walked into his world.

How could he see past all that happened and still want her? After he had let their time pass and after she had pushed him away and been with Lynch- something she thought Derek would never get over- and after the horrible round two fight over Tamara Barnes that happened during the first weeks after Lynch dumped Penelope. Her and Derek had been to hell and back together.

So why wasn't he past seeing her as a lover? She thought he bored quickly of women. That she was just his buddy now. That he didn't dream of her like she dreamt of him.

Was she wrong? The kiss he gave her felt like it was years in the making. And she really wanted another, even if she was nervous about what this all meant.

She was jarred out of her memory by the ringing phone. "Office of the Oracle of All Knowing."

"Baby girl, I need you to run a name for me: Jeff Harris, bounty hunter, last known address in Devil's Hole, Nevada."

"Got it," she sprouted off his life story.

When she was done Derek said "Thanks, sweetheart, keep digging for more. Especially on his ex-wife and the people in their social circle."

"On it."

"Hey......" his voice dropped "are you as preoccupied today as I am?"

"I can multi task, sugar. Don't doubt my skills. You know nobody does it better than I do."

He chuckled. "After last night I know that counts for more than just what you can do on that computer of yours. Talk to you later, babe. Keep those lips warm for me. I can't get them out of my mind for nothing."

Her mouth made an O shape. "Then you better catch your unsub fast so you can get back in the same zip code as your sexy mama's lips, don't you think?"

"Yeah," she could tell he was smiling widely "that is exactly what I was thinking." He hung up.

She sat there remembering the night before some more, as she typed away on her computer, and all the years leading up to that, off the charts, good first kiss that only made her crave another, off the charts, good second kiss.

(I remember every look upon your face.

The way you roll your eyes,

the way you taste.

-

You make it hard for breathing.

-

Cause when I close my eyes

and drift away

I think of you and everything's okay.

I'm finally now believing.

-

That maybe its true.

I can't live without you.

And maybe two

is better than one.

-

There's so much time

to figure out the rest of my life.

And you've already got me coming undone.) (Taylor Swift and Boys Like Girls)