Author's Note: Hey all- so I have two things to apologize for. First off, this chapter is going to be a short little interlude because it was meant to be a part of the last chapter. I honestly thought about scrapping it entirely, but I really love the Nalah/Butler characters, so I decided to keep it anyway- even if it kinda doesn't fit...
ALSO I'm so sorry for everyone that read the first rendition of the chapter. My friend got a new puppy today, and admittedly, I was so excited to meet the pupper that I didn't bother to check to see if the upload was successful. But thank you to ShiftingShadows963, InuGuardian1984, Orihime-San for letting me know! Look up respicefinemm on insta if you wanna see me get mowed down by a 40 lb pup
The metallic doors of Nalah's apartment slid open, her husband striding through the doorway with enough energy radiating off of him to fill the room. Upon entering their living room, he toed off his boots in the front entrance and gave Nalah a toothy smile, "Lucy, I'm home!"
Nalah, who had been occupied prior to his arrival, shoved her project beneath the mud-brown cloth cushion of their sofa. With his attention devoted solely on removing his work gear on a table near the door, she focused on obscuring the deadly metal as best as she could before leaning forward and nabbing a sunset-pink candle off their maple coffee table. She twisted on the cushion, extending the candle out towards Butler with wide, doe eyes blinking innocently at her husband. Deep in her belly, her child gave an anxious kick at the deception.
"Hey honey, want to smell my latest creation?" She asked. Butler ambled casually towards her and perched his elbows on the spine of the sofa, leaning over her shoulder to give the rose-shaped wax an appreciative sniff.
"Smells great, baby." He pressed an enthusiastic kiss to her cheek and pushed away from the couch, "Did you get dinner?"
"I ordered some takeout out from that new seafood restaurant around the corner, "Frying Nemo." She answered passively, placing the candle back down on the coffee table amongst the others. To keep up the farce, she picked up her knife and yet another work in progress. She had been attempting to carve an elephant out of the wax, but her efforts were… not looking promising, to say the least.
"Did you get me anythin'?" his tone was hopeful as he made a beeline for the kitchen.
"No," she responded incredulously, "Why would I do that?"
"Cause you're supposed to love me!" He exclaimed, mock indignation lacing the words. She waited, listening for his response when he opened their fridge. There was a soft chuckle and the sound of crinkling plastic as he withdrew the Styrofoam from its hiding place. "Ya little lyin' hoe!"
"I don't know what on Earth you are talking about." Nalah replied, pressing the blade of the knife to the wax. She felt something pelt the back of her head, knocking it forward slightly. She belted out a burst of giggles as she reached behind her head to find the stale fortune cookie that Geoff had launched at her. She twisted as best as she could, aiming her counterattack at her husband, who of course, managed to duck gracefully out of its trajectory, leaving it to skid across the white tile.
"I'm sorry, did you learn to shoot at the Imperial Stormtrooper Marksman Academy? 'Cause that was sad." Geoff teased, popping his food into the microwave. He gave a little hop ad perched himself up on their black kitchen counter.
"Oh, shut up!" Nalah groused, a sore loser. Geoff laughed, his feet kicking playfully as he waited for the food to finish cooking.
"Don't worry, I love ya' anyway…" He paused thoughtfully, "Has our kid been treating ya' any nicer today?"
As though on cue, the baby gave another frightful kick to Nalah, creating yet another crater in her organs. She rubbed her belly, "No, your child has not been any nicer. In fact, your kid kicks my bladder one more time, we're going to start needing to buy diapers for me." She groaned.
"Why is this only my child now?"
She twisted slightly, leveling the carving knife at him in an accusatory manner, "Because only a pain in my ass this big could belong to you. We both know that my child would be a perfect angel."
Butler wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, "If ya' give me about twenty minutes and a bottle of lube, I can be an entirely different type of pain in your ass."
"Geoff!" Nalah chastised with a squeal, launching the lump of wax at her husband. Her 'wrath' apparently giving her the ability to land a shot at this knee. When she twisted to face him, cheeks ablaze with a furious blush, she found her husband watching her with the most adorable smile plastered to his face. The sparkle in his expression had her breathless- the way her eyes found his as he drank in the beauty of her reaction, she felt the warmth of their combined love fill her. They stayed that way for what felt like an eternity… until the microwave interrupted the moment.
Geoff pulled out the food from the microwave, grabbed a fork and resumed his perch on the counter, shoveling the food down his gullet.
With a sigh, Nalah shook her head. Geoff had many attractive qualities… the way he scarfed down food like he thought someone was going to take it away—yeah, that was not one of them.
For a while, there was silence and she took a small pleasure from the domestic bliss while her husband ate. After a bit, Geoff broke the quiet and pointed his fork at the entrance where two, thin, plain candles sat, "I see ya' set out candles for Emma and Garrus. I know that Garrus's black candle means protection, but what does Emma's mean?"
Without looking up, she answered, "Green is for emotional healing and acceptance. I prayed for new beginnings." She glanced up at the candles in question. The thin green piece sat on a clean candleholder alongside a long black strip. The paper she had laid down on the antique brass with Garrus and Emma's names was now smothered under the combined mixture of the melted wax- a prayer her grandmother had taught her long ago.
Speaking around the food in his mouth, Geoff whined playfully, "Where's mine? What am I, now? Chopped liver? I see how it is."
Nalah pointed at the other side of the room where a single candle was perched on their windowsill. The brass candleholder here was significantly different from the clean, yet clearly worn holders that she used for her friends. The metal on this one was caked in several layers of different colored wax, denoting the different types of prayers she had placed for him over the many years of their love. The older layers of pinks and reds yielded to silver (victory), deep violet (to drive away evil) and black (protection).
"Ah, there I am!" He quipped brightly. He dumped his finished meal in the trash and washed off the fork. "Actually, speaking of candles…"
"Hmm…?" Nalah hummed.
"Are we both gonna to continue to pretendin' that I didn't see you hiding somethin' in the cushion? I ain't no Yankee Candle, but I know for damn sure you don't need a detonator to make Pecan Surprise scented candles." He tsked.
"Ah, fuck." Nalah bit out with mild irritation. She put down the carving she had feigned interest in.
"Nalah," He began, his tone soft.
"I know, I know." She conceded. He walked behind her and began massaging her shoulders. She leaned back, staring up.
"We talked about this. Ya' can't just be doin' that kinda thing here anymore. We gotta start thinkin' about more than just you and me—"
He was right. She knew he was right. But, "I know, we agreed no more explosives or weapons in the house… but… I'm bored. This" She gestured to the candles, "this isn't me. I want to be back in the field. We made a great team."
Her husband's face was sympathetic, "I thought for sure you would like this candle makin' crap—figured you would like settin' things on fire." He announced, realizing now that she only had the supplies out to make her actions seem less suspicious for when he arrived home.
"For a little bit I did… but right now, the apartment smells like a eucalyptus tree's butthole and it doesn't give me the same thrill like when I make a 'toy'. I feel so useless. This mother goose thing isn't me. Meanwhile, you're out with Garrus and Emma's saving Omega from itself…" Her confession trailed off.
Butler made his way around the couch and flopped down, pulling Nalah tight to his chest and giving her a good squeeze. She curled as much as her belly would allow and pouted, enjoying the sensation of his fingers trailing through her hair.
After a few breaths, he relented, "Alright then. Well, I guess we don't gotta worry about grabby hands at this point in the game. Lemme get a good look at this bad boy." Nalah pulled back suddenly, her eyes alight.
"Really?" She asked, an ecstatic undercurrent lacing her words.
"Ya' better blow me away…" He thought about what he said for a second, before adding, "ah… figuratively, of course."
Nalah let out a high-pitched squeal and began fishing between the cushions for the metal contraption she had hidden. She surprised Butler by getting to her knees and pulling even more out from under the couch. When she returned to his side, she had several crude prototypes on display. All of them were constructed in the same bone shape with disconnected wires haphazardly sticking this way and that. She placed them in his lap for his analysis. He made a big show of inspecting the constructs, though deep down they both knew he hadn't the faintest idea of what he was looking at.
When she grew bored of this, she yanked the unfinished bomb out of his hands and shook it excited (an action that had Butler attempting to not shit his pants).
"Geoff, this might be my finest work yet! I'm going to talk to Garrus about this, but if you guys are ever against Eclipse or someone tech-savvy, this will be your golden ticket. It'll work somewhat like an EMP—completely fry out any sensors while leaving yours," She dropped low into a dramatic whisper, "completely intact. Slap this bad boy on a grid, and we're talking about killing power for half a district… Of course, it will also blow anything within a 10 meter radius to kingdom come… but," She scoffed haughtily, pretending to buff her nails on her shirt, "I could make something like that in my sleep. Only problem is that I can't get the omni-gel/nitroglycerin mixture to hold."
Geoff had nearly zero idea what she was talking about, but the way his wife's intelligence worked brought a smile to his face. He pressed a kiss to the top of her head, "I love when ya' talk tech with me. You really outdid yourself on this one, I can't wait to see what the finished product looks like. Garrus will lose his mind." She beamed, placing the incomplete project on their table.
"Speaking of Garrus, Emma told me everything. Did he tell you? He finally made a move!" Nalah gossiped.
Geoff's response was distant and he pretended to brush the dust from an imaginary medal on his chest, "Yeah, I guess ya' could say that I was the one to convince him to go through with it."
Nalah smacked the offending hand playfully, "Liar!"
"What're ya' talkin' about! Of course, I did! That shit went on so long even I was startin' to get blue balls!"
"Bunch of dummies," She commented, her affection apparent.
"Ain't ya' glad we don't act that dumb?"
"We? What's this 'we'? No, it's me. I am the only that's not dumb out of the four of us."
Geoff looked pensive for a moment, which worried Nalah. Nothing intelligent ever came out when Geoff had been deep in thought.
"A turian and a human. My pa' would be rolling in his grave if he knew. Ya' think Emma always had a thing for 'em or Garrus is just like, an exception?" Butler asked, his hand stroking Nalah's long mane absentmindedly.
"I think she said she had a crush on Xal'Metor on The Enkindlers, so I guess we know for sure that she likes quarians."
"I guess Ems just got a dextro kink."
Nalah cleared her throat, "I don't think kinks work that way, honey."
Butler's head jerked to Nalah and he had a confused expression, "You think… I mean, do you ever wonder what it looks like?"
"What what looks like?" Nalah asked, her brows furrowed.
"You know… it… their thing…. The bauble."
Nalah shook her head, "What are you talking about?"
"A turian's… schmeckle. His baloney pony."
Nalah held up her hand, "Okay, stop. I get what you mean—"
"—His pied piper—"
"Geoff"
"His purple-headed yogurt flinger—well, I mean, I dunno if theirs is purple, per se… But—"
"EW!"
"Well, have you?" He asked.
Nalah shook her head once again, hair slapping the sides of her face furiously, "No, I haven't! I've never looked a turian and thought, 'hey, I would like to see his penis!' And before you ask, I haven't seen any other alien penises either. I don't know, and I don't want to know."
"But, aren't you a little curious. I mean, you and Emma watch all those shows…"
"That's not the same! They always cut away from the action! Everyone knows that the elcor actor isn't having sex with the volus in Heartwarming: I Love You!" The blush was rising up her neck and into her cheeks once again.
"Do you think… Do you think Emma's seen one?"
"She's a doctor, Geoff. She has to know their anatomy."
"Yeah, but it's usually locked away behind their plates. I mean, who here hasn't seen a turian without their clothes on? After moving to Omega, it's almost weird not to see at least one naked species on the way home from work. Everyone knows that it only comes out of their plates when they're aroused… Okay, now I just can't get my mind off it. I need to know!"
She watched as Geoff pulled out his omni-tool and began searching the internet.
"Oh my God. Geoff, Geoff what are you doing?" Nalah exclaimed, burying her face into his shoulder.
"I'm just logging onto Fornax." Geoff answered, scrolling through a series of videos. When he found one that seemed to sate his curiosity (Sandy Turian B!T(H with THiN Waist Gets PLOWED! !), he pressed the button and began the video.
Immediately after pressing the link, their apartment was filled with the ridiculously horrifying sounds of turian plates colliding loudly in a rhythmic pattern. The only noises punctuating the "crack, crack, crack" of pounding hips was the shrilly hissing noise that the turian female seemed to be emitting. This noise appeared to produce a desired, erotic effect on the turian male in the video—much to the dismay of Nalah and Butler. Allowing her curiosity to get the better of her, Nalah found herself sneaking a peak of the vid from behind her fingers, only to emit a loud gasp of horror as her eyes grew impossibly wide.
"Oh dear lord! Turn it off!"
Much to Nalah's chagrin, Butler was laughing maniacally, "Holy shit! Look at that thing!"
"NO!" Nalah groaned loudly, burying her face back into the safety of his shoulder.
The video reached a climax (or rather, the turian's reached his climax) and it was… traumatizing. The video concluded, ending with several links that the site seemed to think that Nalah and Butler would also 'appreciate"
The two sat in stunned silence for a single breath before Nalah grabbed the front of her husband's civvies and aggressively yanked him forward.
"Do you think Emma knows?"
"I—" Geoff began.
"I SAID DO YOU THINK EMMA KNOWS?!" Nalah screamed.
"I—I was kidding about before. I'm sure she does! Jesus, Nalah, you're scaring me!" He exclaimed, looking down at the tiny fist that had managed to yank him from his comfortable position.
"I need to warn her! I need to protect Emma! She needs to know!" Nalah began, now activating her omni-tool. Butler grabbed her arm in an attempt to get her to stop.
"Nalah, no."
"I need to!" Nalah scooched further down the couching, leaning her body away so that Geoff's grabbing hands wouldn't deactivate her omni-tool.
"Nalah! No, no, no, no, no, no, no! Please don't cockblock my boss, I'll never hear the end of it!" Butler was now attempting to crawl over Nalah's body (all while being very careful of the precious cargo in her abdomen).
At that moment, both of their omni-tools turning red and emitting the tell-tale SOS alert. They stopped their fighting and Nalah watched as Butler reactivated his omni-tool and paled.
"What is it?" She asked, her chest tight.
Butler looked up at Nalah, his face strained, "It's Garrus… Emma's… been kidnapped."