Acceptance
Chapter nine: Losing Control
Harry had been horrified by what he'd seen; Voldemort had killed his only living family because of HIM. Voldemort had been looking for HIM! Three more deaths because of HIM!
Even though he knew it wouldn't work, he'd still thrown himself in front of a cruciatus aimed at his aunt. Just like before, it did nothing to help her; it only caused him more pain. All he could do was watch. Watch Voldemort cold-bloodedly murder his only remaining family.
When the vision was over, he realized he was being held by Sn-Severus. The safe feeling was back.
And that was when he completely lost control of his emotions and broke down sobbing. The arm around his chest tightened and pulled him closer. He gripped the fabric and held on to it for dear life.
"He killed…He … He killed them, the three of them. Because of me." He pushed himself up and looked into Sn-Severus' black eyes. "They died because of ME!!" And he dissolved into tears. Severus pulled him close. "Everyone dies because of ME! My parents, Cedric, the rest of my 'family.' All…all of those muggles…because of me!"
Severus pulled Harry up and made him look him in the eyes. "You DID NOT cause those deaths," he said with a quiet authority. Harry only cried harder and tried to bury himself into Severus' robes again, but Severus made him look him in the eye. "No, Harry, it's not. It's the Dark Lord's. HE is the one who killed your parents, Cedric, and your 'family.' Not you, HIM. If you hadn't stopped him that night, the war would have continued. Many, many more would have died."
"But…But I …I let Wormtail live…it was me…He's the one that brought him back. He used my blood. It was MY idea that Cedric and I tie."
"The Dark Lord would have found a way. If it hadn't been Wormtail, he would have found someone else. He didn't have to use your blood; he could have used someone else's. He's a smart man. It has NOTHING to do with you."
Harry couldn't stop himself from crying. This time, he succeeded in burying himself in Severus' robes and balling. Severus just held him and let him cry. Harry felt a hand on his back. It helped to comfort and calm him, but didn't stop the tears from falling.
When Uncle Sev left, Harry went to go change in the bedroom Draco and Harry shared. Draco sat on the couch, tense, listening. After what felt like and eternity, he heard a horrible scream coming from the bedroom. He ran in. Harry was screaming his lungs out on the bed. He sat on it and shook Harry to try and wake him up, but it didn't work.
Very soon, Uncle Sev came storming in. He sat on the bed and said to Draco: "Go get all of the nerve-healing potions, a dreamless sleep potion, and some water."
With out pausing to think, he did as he was told.
When he came back, the sight that greeted stunned him. Harry was screaming and thrashing and trying to escape Uncle Sev, but he just held Harry tightly to him.
The first thing Draco felt was jealousy. He'd never been held: not by his mom, and certainly never by Lucius or Uncle Sev. But here was Harry, a boy neither knew very well, and Uncle Sev was holding him.
But then he came to his senses and the rational part of his mind kicked in. Maybe there was something else going on here that he didn't know about. Harry was obviously having some sort of…dream…and was obviously in pain. He set down the phials and sat behind Harry.
The yelling stopped, but Harry still sat rigidly; he was apparently still having a dream. After a long while he relaxed and broke down sobbing. As he listened to Harry and Uncle Sev talk, he sat stunned. The things Harry blamed himself for! And Uncle Sev was right- none of it was his fault.
He looked at Harry in a new light. Maybe, he wasn't the spoiled brat he thought he was. He's apparently been through a lot and was carrying around a lot of guilt. What he needed right now was support, like what Draco had wished for so many times. Now, he could do for someone else what had never been done for him-offer strength, support, and comfort. He tentatively stretched out his hand and put it on Harry's back.
Any jealousy he might have felt had vanished.
But he was still very confused, so he asked Uncle Sev, "I don't get it. What the heck just happened?"
"Maybe Harry should be the one to tell you." But Harry just shook his head and burrowed deeper in to Uncle Sev's robes. Uncle Sev sighed. "All right. Harry gets…visions of the Dark Lord, meetings, and …other things, through his link with the Dark Lord. It was forged when he got the scar, and after the third task, he could see the meetings. He can also feel the cruciatus as though it is placed directly on him. He also feels the after effects. That was why I asked you to get the nerve- healing potion."
Draco swallowed. "Does he see…you know…sport?" Harry cried harder.
Uncle Sev seemed to know what he was thinking, and answered, "Yes, he does, and…yes…he did. But don't worry. He won't say anything."
A/N: This is a couple of days late, I know. Disk trouble. I wanted to post while I was in North Dakota and Minnesota, but we were staying in these time-shares, and I don't have a laptop. Anyway, here it is for your enjoyment. Please, don't forget to review! I would like to thank my bff, my 'sis' my 'sam' and my beta for helping me with this fic!
Thanks to all of those of you who reviewed: Jen(),nickole(),Alina11, leggylover03, Awen, Trunks()
Replies to reviewers:
scythe21: I've read up to chapter 11 of your story, and it's incredible! I'll probably finish reading it tonight, (fingers crossed), and review, and email you, if you want me to.
Sky(): I think you're right, he is acting more like a mum! But don't worry, father/son bonding to be coming soon.
Catti: I'm sorry for torturing you. That wasn't my intention. Please see A/N for the rest of your concerns.
starangel2106: I don't like shopping either, which is why I didn't go into too much detail.
Anora: Yes, it is out. Dundundun!
Moni(): The order has very little timing, it's true.
Hecate Aiwe: I'm glad you like the pace I'm going. If you think I'm going too fast, please, let me know!!! And thank you for reading my story, even if it's not as long as you're used to. That means a lot. I also have a bad habit of not reviewing, but I've been reviewing a lot more lately, due somewhat to the large amount I got from you. Thank you again for all of those.
Nation El-Diablo: I'm sure we're not the only ones who do. I'm sure there are a lot of other people who kill the Dursley's. Come to think of it, I haven't read too many….
jennifer(): I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks that. I'm glad I didn't offend you. But we actually spent most of our time in this tiny, tiny, tiny, tiny little town on the boarder of Minnesota and North Dakota. I didn't even know I was in Minnesota until a couple days after I arrived! Lol
GoddessMoonLady: Adding flavor and complicating things is why I brought Draco into the story. I'm glad you picked up on that!
Foureyedsnail: I'm glad you like the OOC.