Rogue's day was proving to be one of the most grueling. She was trying to teach the mechanics of the Blackbird to a group of bored students when Bobby came in and needed to take the plane on a mission. If Rogue had not been hung over she would have been more alert. In fact, she would have noticed that Bobby was going on a mission without a team. Instead, Rogue was oblivious. She dismissed her class and headed outside for some much needed peace and quiet.
She sat further away in the courtyard under a tree, trying to play over last night's events in her mind. She'd had a lot of fun with Remy and despite all her efforts, found herself falling for him. And that couldn't happen. She remembered letting him dance a little too close with her and hoped he wouldn't get the wrong idea and think anything of it. They were friends, she would go as far as to say best friends, and Rogue intended to keep it that way.
The end of the evening was a haze. She had drunk way too much last night. The drinks Remy had been buying her went down really easy, like they had no alcohol at all. She didn't even remember getting back to the mansion. How had she ended up in her pajamas this morning? Her eyes widened. Remy better not have… I'm gonna kill that guy!
"That's not the tune you were singing last night," Emma said, sitting down beside her. Rogue smiled and moved over for her friend.
"Remind me again. What tune was I singing last night?"
"I believe you declared that, 'Remy LeBeau was the greatest thing ta ev'a happen in your life!'" Emma announced in her best 'Drunk Rogue' voice.
"Oh God, I didn't!" Rogue moaned, covering her face in mortification.
"Yup, wrapped your arms around his neck and said it right to his face."
"Oh GOD!" Rogue wailed, burying her head in her arms.
"Then you kissed him," Emma finished wickedly.
"WHAT!" Rogue screamed, popping her head up and causing a few wandering mutants to stop and stare.
"Oh, no worries, he's fine. He kissed you back."
"Ughhhhhh, I have to train with him after lunch today! How could this have happened?" Rogue moaned. Remy was going to be in his element today. Visions of 'Pepe Le Pew' cartoons ran through her head.
Emma shrugged. "All girls like drinking and dancing. I don't see what the big deal is."
"The big deal is; He's my BEST FRIEND. Now he's going to get all weird-possessive-lovey-dovey on me!" Rogue wailed in despair.
"I thought he already was," Emma answered under her breath.
"Yes! But now everything is completely different!"
Emma sighed. She let Rogue rant on. There was no talking her off this ledge. Emma really couldn't see what the big deal was. Boy likes girl. Girl likes boy. Boy and Girl get together, it's not like it was quantum physics. It should've been the easiest thing in the world. But with Remy as the boy, and Rogue as the girl, it seemed like it was quantum physics.
Emma had visited Rogue's mind on many occasions and knew she harboured feelings for Remy. And Remy, well, whether he knew it or not, he wore his heart on his sleeve. Emma was sure that the only person who didn't know he was crazy about Rogue, was Rogue. The whole thing was a complete mess. She couldn't figure out why Rogue kept resisting. Emma had tried and tried to find out, but Rogue having had so much practice locking away other people's thoughts had become very good at locking away her own.
Kitty came jogging up to the two women when she saw them under the tree. She had a tube of lipstick in her hand.
"Hey, guys," she panted, trying to catch her breath. She handed Rogue the lipstick. "I thought you might like your own tube. It worked well last night so-"
"Even Kitty knows I kissed him!" Rogue cried, throwing her hands up. "This whole thing is a disaster!"
Kitty gave Emma a worried look. Emma mouthed out 'don't worry about it.' Kitty nodded, taking a seat beside Rogue, who had now begun her rant of impending doom all over again.
Remy had taken to shuffling his deck of cards over and over as he waited for Rogue to show up. He was anxious, scared and excited to see her all at the same time. He was a mess, not sure how to smoothly take the next step with her. All he had to do was just tell her the truth about how he felt. It was a lot harder to do than he thought. He should have told her last night, but he'd lost his confidence and backed down.
He saw her in the doorway, and lost control of the deck he was shuffling. Playing cards flew up haphazardly around his face.
"Hi," she said.
"Hi," he answered, looking disheveled amongst the spilt cards. Awkward silence filled the air. Rogue bit her lip.
"Look, Remy, about last night when we… when we, um…"
"Kissed?" He offered up.
"Yeah. About that. I-I um, think it would be best if we both, uh, pretended it didn't happen."
Remy's heart sank.
"But it did happen," Remy answered weakly, bracing himself for what he knew was coming next.
"We were both drunk. It doesn't count," Rogue said quietly.
"Right," he replied bitterly, looking away. Here it comes.
He had uttered the next phrase so many times in his life he knew it by heart. Today was the first day anyone had ever said it to him. It was so surreal hearing the words but not his voice saying them.
"Remy, you're great, really," Rogue started gently, "but I think we should just be friends."
"But I don't want to be jus' friends." Did he just say that out loud? The look on her face said yes.
"C'mon, Remy," she said painfully. "You know we wouldn't work. I know right now it's all sexy and dangerous not being able to touch, but that novelty wears off. You can't tell me you'd be happy holding hands through gloves leading a life of celibacy a year from now. You're a guy. You deserve a girl who you can touch and who can touch you back. With me, we both just get hurt." Tears began sliding down her cheeks.
So that was what this was about.
"I don't want another girl!" he cried angrily. "I'm not him, Chere, I'm not Bobby!"
It was as if he'd slapped her in the face. His words stung only because he'd hit the mark perfectly. She had loved Bobby and he had loved her in the beginning, but Rogue knew first hand that love didn't last very long without touch. She hated the idea of her and Remy ending up the same way. Better to end it now with good memories of him. No infidelities. No lonely nights.
"I'm sorry, Remy," she said between sobs. "I never meant to lead you on."
Having nothing more to say that could make this situation any better, Rogue turned and left, crying.
"But I love you," he said too late to an empty room.
For the next week Remy lived a lie. He was all smiles and laughter as if nothing in the world was wrong. He flirted obnoxiously with Dazzler and Jubilee, who fawned over him shamelessly. Dazzler went as far as to offer to 'dazzle him' any time, which he uncomfortably declined.
Remy had never felt so vulnerable before and he hated it. He couldn't bear to be around Rogue. She had rejected and humiliated him. After all the time he'd spent with her trying to prove how unlike Bobby he was, she still didn't see it. So, he pretended that he didn't care. Perhaps if he pretended long enough, he'd believe his lie too.
Emma wanted to smack him. He wasn't helping his cause at all with all his tomcat antics. But, she couldn't really blame him; he'd had his heart broken and was living in a sad little world of denial, coping the only way he knew how. But still. He went out drinking every night, surprisingly back by curfew with God only knew who. Emma had purposely brushed past Dazzler one day and was thankful to find that despite his grand performance for everyone else, Remy was sleeping alone.
Rogue had become withdrawn and quiet again, dutifully pushing people away. She still hung out with Emma, and for some strange reason, Kitty. It was ironic to see the two become friends.
Rogue looked on the verge of tears most of the time and Emma was pretty sure she'd gone to cry in the bathroom when Dazzler hung onto Remy, running her fingers through his hair. Vexed, Emma gave Dazzler nightmares that night. Emma was pleased her Cuckoos still followed Remy around at break. Through the quints she could keep an eye on him most of the time. When he did see Rogue around the mansion, Remy's world would stop and he'd pine for her at safe distance. Making him now a tragic romantic hero to his ever diligent fan club.
By next Monday things had changed. Emma caught Kitty in the hallway chasing quickly behind Rogue.
"I'm sure she didn't mean it, and if she did, she's cow." Kitty huffed.
Emma joined the two, ending up in Rogue's room as Rogue crackled with anger, not saying a word. Emma looked quizzically to Kitty.
"Rogue over heard Dazzler talking about her," Kitty explained angrily. "Called her 'a backwoods hick' and didn't know what Remy had ever seen 'in a rat like her'."
"Two can play this game," Rogue muttered. She was well aware that what happened between herself and Remy was her own fault. She had told him to find another girl, but to find one so quickly and Dazzler? Come on. Everyone knew she got around.
Rogue was angry. Remy had practically yelled at her, saying he didn't want anyone else and now here he was a week later, a week! Making time with whomever he could. Rogue couldn't deny she was jealous.
The last week had been hell for her. Her training sessions with Remy had become a nightmare. There were no more smiles, clever flirting, and he didn't even call her 'Chere' anymore. The Remy she once knew was replaced by a serious, professional, cold robot.
All Rogue wanted was to go back to the way they were. She realized too late that she hated being without Remy. She hated seeing Remy with other girls even more. She often found herself thinking if it really was better this way; to be heartbroken now or pursue a relationship with him and be heartbroken later down the road. The latter proved to be the answer she liked most. It was then that Rogue resolved to jump on the band wagon and chase the Cajun herself.