status on hiatus
prompt my conscience bugging me for not updating
warnings SMUTT (although non-graphic)
notice Hello, everyone! It's been a while, huh? I had this chapter half-finished for six months, and I thought it was finally time I gave you something to read. I must warn you, though. This is not a great chapter by any chance. I think Minato seems a little out of character and Kushina's confession's a little too rushed, but that's how I had imagined it in my mind. I mean, they're pretty messed up, after all. As for me, I have a little over a month until my exams and I'm absolutely vivid, and highly optimistic, might I add. Wish me luck, will ya? Next update will definitely be in the beginning of summer, so take care, okay? Chapter ten, here we go!

10. Some Sex, No Drugs & A Little Rock N' Roll

"When life gives you lemons, sometimes you just have to shut up and eat the fucking lemons."

Minato drummed his fingers on his guitar's neck impatiently. His eyes were focused on the red-haired woman sitting across from him, who kept toying with her fingernails. He frowned at the sight—Kushina wasn't the one to regularly paint her nails, and black was a color he despised on her. Of course, she always did things to spite him, but this was simply ridiculous.

He would never understand women.

First she came here, with determination flashing in her bright eyes, and now she had fallen into complete silence, like someone died and she didn't know how to break it to him. Minato frowned inwardly. He really hoped nobody had died.

Kushina carefully avoided Minato's penetrating blue eyes by looking at everything in the room but him. Sure, she had gone there in order to open up to him, but it was so much easier said than done. She trusted him, she knew that now, but still, it was really hard for her to talk about her life before moving to New York. The only people who knew the whole story were Mikoto, Fugaku and Inoichi, and they had sort of lived it through, so she never actually had to explain anything to them. But now Minato was in her life for good, and it was only fair that he got to know as well.

Oh, God. This is absolutely stupid, Kushina cursed at her own cowardice. She was really losing her touch.

Minato, who had had enough waiting by now—he could be patient when he wanted to, but now was simply not the time for that—let out a impatient sigh. "Will you look at me?"

Kushina's head snapped at his direction and she raised an eyebrow. "Huh?"

"You've been sitting there for ten minutes, staring at the dust on my coffee table like it's the most interesting thing in the world."

There was the beginning of a smirk on her lips. "Well, I always did find your obsession with cleanliness astounding. And seeing that you obviously haven't cleaned in a while made me think—"

"Stop beating around the bush!" Minato exclaimed, stunning her. In all the time she'd known him, she had never heard Minato yell. Sometimes she wasn't even sure if the man was human with all the patience he possessed. "You took two weeks to yourself to think things out—have you?"

Kushina started. "Yeah, I—"

"Then, talk! Look me in the eye and tell me what you've come here to say! What you're doing is good for neither of us. You need to get it off your chest and I need to hear it." His eyes softened. "Don't torment yourself, Kushina."

Kushina's eyes fell on the floor. "I'm sorry," she said, after taking a deep breath. Under other circumstances, she would have yelled at him for daring to raise his voice, but now was one of the rare times when he was right and she accepted it. "I don't want us to fight on the first day we've seen each other in two weeks."

Minato pouted. She had that knack for making him feel bad so that he wouldn't stay mad at her for long that drove him absolutely livid. But, truth was, he couldn't stay mad at her for long. He loved her way too much to give her the cold shoulder. But it had been two rough weeks, and his patience had worn out. He was an emotional wreck, and even though he wanted to help her feel better, he was in no place to do so.

"Can you play a song?" Kushina whispered, breaking him out of his thoughts.

He was about to protest—because this really wasn't the time to be playing songs—when she locked her eyes with his, and all his qualms vanished. Without further delays, he grabbed his guitar and got in position. "Which one?"

Kushina gave him a weak smile. "Carry You Home."

Minato was taken aback from her choice of song—it was an extremely melancholy song that he had written in the past two weeks and played live only once in the radio station—but complied nevertheless. After all, she had always told him that his songs helped her calm down and relax, and that was exactly what she needed at the moment.

He took a deep breath and let his fingertips stroke the strings of his guitar lovingly. The strings bent to his maneuvers as if they were puppets and he was their master. As soon as the instrumental part was over, his lips parted and the lyrics fell out, in perfect sync with the melody. As he sat there, playing his guitar, everything vanished around him. The music consumed him, travelled him to higher places—places where nobody who hasn't felt the harmony of the world around him can ever go.

Kushina stood there paralyzed, listening to his melodic voice, and watching the muscles on his arms flex as he hit the chords again and again, never missing a tune. She couldn't help but feel jealous of the blond musician. He was perfect. His extraordinary gift of composing poetic lyrics and performing them just as amazingly was truly astounding. His eyes were closed, and Kushina contemplated letting her tears fall. She had done a lot of crying during the past couple of weeks, to a point where she thought there weren't any more to shed, but it seemed like they were about to overflow once again.

She hummed quietly the lyrics of the song under her breath, hoping that it would give her the boost she needed. Before she knew it, her voice had been raised to match Minato's tone, and they were both perfectly synchronized with each other as they sang. Minato didn't make any move to interrupt the song when Kushina's voice joined his own. He knew it was some sort of release for her to be singing, but he didn't know why exactly she was so tense. He sincerely hoped she would open up soon, though.

"As strong as you were, tender you go. I'm watching you breathing for the last time. A song for your heart, and when it is quiet—I know what it means and I'll carry you home."He paused, and then played a G chord. "I'll carry you home."

The sound echoed in the otherwise silent apartment for a moment, until it finally died down and silence settled among the couple once again. Minato wavered for a moment before opening his blue eyes and, when he did, he could barely register what he was seeing.

Kushina was once again crying, but the sight was quite the opposite of the last time he had witnessed such an act from her. She was not yelling nor making a sound at all. Her face was buried in the palms of her hands and she was sobbing quietly, her shoulders shaking with every sob.

Now, Minato was not a bad person by any means. The worst thing he may have ever done was pull his sister's ponytail, and only after she had been tormenting him for hours. There was no person alive who could characterize him as wicked, not even remotely unkind—Kushina's parents excluded because, well, they hated him. But still, he couldn't help but feel like a rotten bastard who had committed thousands of crimes as he stared silently at Kushina's crying form. Because he knew that those tears were for him.

Against his better judgement, he stood up and, after hastily discarding his guitar, he kneeled before her and tentatively pried her hands away from her face. He immediately regretted doing so though, because Kushina's cheeks were stained with tears and her usually sparkling eyes were red. Not for the first time that night, he felt his heart shatter in a million pieces.

"Kushina," he whispered, grasping her wrists tightly. "Look at me."

The red-haired woman hiccupped, but did not comply. Instead, she pressed her eyelids shut and bowed her head.

Minato would have rolled his eyes, were he not scared out of his mind. Ever since he was a small child, exploring the world through his blue eyes and small hands, he had always wanted the people around him to be smiling. And when they didn't, he took it up to himself to make them forget whatever it was that was troubling them and smile brightly. It was a habit that carried on as years passed and he would not give it up now. With newfound determination, he leaned into her and pressed his lips against Kushina's closed eyelids.

"Please."

The little motion jerked Kushina out of her trance and she opened her hazel eyes to find that there was barely an inch separating them anymore. Maybe that was fate's way of telling them that they hadn't completely screwed up, that there was still something there for them. As the tears started to dry on her porcelain cheeks, Kushina leaned forward and closed her mouth over Minato's in a desperate and hungry kiss.

Minato's lips parted in their own accord. Two weeks of heartache and celibacy had taken their toll on him and his body seemed to react faster than his mind. Before he knew it, his tongue was battling Kushina's and her hands were unfastening his pants. Neither of them realized how they managed to get rid of all their clothing without breaking or tearing anything.

His mind started to cooperate when he had straddled Kushina against the couch and was pushing his way inside her body. He had always been a gentle lover, tending to her needs and putting her pleasure above his, but at that moment, every fiber of his being was screaming for release. Perhaps for the first time in his life, he cared only for his satisfaction.

Kushina cherished that new, unexpected, animalistic side of Minato. She enjoyed their tender lovemaking of course, but there was something else about being ravished so hard and fast. The man groaning above her was definitely full of surprises. He pushed in, only to pull out before she could relish the feeling of his shaft inside her, and then he repeated the pattern.

It was all over before they had time to think back and stop themselves. Minato remained inside her, unmoving and panting heavily as he braced himself on his elbows so that he wouldn't crash her with his weight. Kushina allowed herself to take in his post-coital expression. His face looked calm, but his brow was slightly ceased, as if something was troubling him. Of course, he would have felt odd about fucking her when their relationship was still uncertain.

Well, damn him and his self-righteousness.

They lay there, in the post-coital silence, with their breaths mingling together in the dim lighting of the room. Minato's breathing had slowed down way before hers, but he didn't make any move to remove himself. Although he despised himself for jumping Kushina all of a sudden, he would be lying if he said that he didn't need it. It was a strange thing, really. He had never been addicted to sex or relying on it when in a relationship, but this woman was making other sides of himself—ones that he wasn't even aware that existed—surface. She was changing him, and he couldn't quite place whether it was for better or worse.

"I was born on July 10th, in Boston," Kushina spoke out of the blue, startling him, but he didn't move an inch. "I have an older sister, Kaori. She is a doctor and she lives in Washington with her fiancé. My family originates from an old aristocratic family of Japan, who moved to America ages ago. We are closely associated with the Yamanaka and Uchiha clans. I grew up with Mikoto and Fugaku and Inoichi; I've known them since I can remember myself."

Minato raised an eyebrow at the sudden confession, but kept silent. He absently realized that he had finally succeeded—she was opening up to him.

"My family is comprised of doctors of any kind; surgeons, dentists, veterinarians, nurses. It is a family tradition that has been passed on for generations through the years, and the genes that are passed down to us by our parents are carrying that passion for medicine as well. No one in the history of our clan has ever reclined from that choice of career, besides me."

Kushina halted and shut her eyes. She felt Minato reach down and plant a kiss on each of her tear-stained cheeks, and her lips tugged slightly upwards. "Go on," he whispered against her soft skin, running his arms down her sides and finally resting them around her waist. Abruptly, she was pulled into a sitting position chest-to-chest with Minato, and her chin was resting on his shoulder.

"Go on," he repeated.

Kushina wrapped her arms around his torso. "I was four when I first expressed my artistic talent. My father was proud at first, gloating over how gifted his daughter was, so he signed me up for painting classes. I was so excited when he told me, and I vowed to prove myself worthy of the chance I was given."

"As years passed, I turned to art more and more. I took photos, I played the piano, but I mainly painted. I used to have a shitload of portraits and paintings and all kinds of stuff you can imagine. When I entered high school, they realized that I wasn't gonna follow in their footsteps.

That was the first time we came to a rupture. My father told me that I would become a doctor whether I wanted to or not, so I should give up arts and all that crap before it was too late to get out." A bitter chuckle escaped her lips. "Get out, you hear? Like I was getting into something that would lead me to my doom."

"What did you do?" Minato prompted, giving her incentive to go on. He felt proud of himself for finally making her come out of her shell, but he had a feeling that she needed to be constantly reminded that he wanted this — wanted to know about her life before him.

"I rebelled," Kushina murmured against his shoulder, making it sound almost a natural thing to do. "I titled my head high and told him that I wasn't gonna give up everything I loved to condemn myself to a life of misery."

"Did he buy it?"

"Psh, no," she said with a snort. "If they were that easy, we wouldn't be having this conversation right now."

"Then, what happened?" he asked, rubbing smooth circles on her back. It seemed surreal that they were sitting on his couch in a mess of tangled bodies, and Kushina was narrating her life story. In his mind, this wasn't exactly how he'd expected this meeting to go.

"I ran away." She laughed softly at the memory. She really had been a basketcase back in her teens. "I sneaked out in the middle of the night, while they were asleep, and sought refuge at Inoichi's. I knew Mikoto was out of the question — Uchihas are as much of a pain as my own folks. But Inoichi would never give me in, 'cause Yamanakas are cool like that." Kushina halted when her words sunk in. She grimaced. Did I just praise Inoichi? "Anyway, I was a goner for, like, two days, before they went nuts and I made an appearance. My mom was freaked out — said that if I ever pulled something like that again, she'd strap me to the bed. But, in the end, it was worth it. I got it my way."

Minato smiled despite himself. He hadn't doubted it for a second. "How'd you do it?"

He felt her shrug. "I sort of blackmailed them, I guess. Told them that if I didn't get to study art, I'd ran away for good. Guess even the most emotionally retarded people can be moved by their feelings. So, my father didn't mention med school again and, when I graduated, he enrolled me into Black & White."

A long sigh escaped her lips and she pulled back enough to face him. "And that's the story of Kushina Uzumaki." Her hands tentatively reached up to cup his cheeks and Minato smiled. "Are we okay?"

The slowly materializing grin on Minato's thin lips was answer enough. "I think we will be, Kushina."

And they both felt obliged to seal that deal as well.

Later that night, when the pair was lying at Minato's bed, entangled in the soft sheets and wrapped around each other, Kushina felt finally at peace. In the two weeks of separation from her blond manchild, she had come to realize quite a few things; about herself and their relationship as well.

First of all, Minato was much more of an idiot than what she thought at first. It took a great deal of courage to face Kushina's parents and not be affected by them, but a great deal more to stand back and actually wait for her to fight her demons and find her way back to him. Kushina was not an easy person to get along with, by any chance. That was one of her personality traits that she'd let show from the very first time they'd met. Plus, she wasn't the kindest or subtlest person alive. But Minato—he overcame those obstacles as if they didn't even exist, and still took her back after all she'd put him through.

She allowed herself to quietly admit that he was, indeed, a special person. The kinds of which you may search for an entire lifetime, and still not manage to find them. It made her feel nice, somewhere deep inside her chest, that she'd found him without even remotely trying.

Secondly, Kushina had decided that desperate times called for desperate measures; and weren't these some desperate times. Her separation from Minato had given her time to think about all the occasions where her parents had been almost manhandling her, pointing her to the direction they thought was the right one. She was a rebel by nature, and she'd come to realize that rebellions always have high prices to pay. Hers would be her dependence on them. Kushina may have liked to gloat about being an independent woman who didn't give a fuck about others, but, truth was, she was a far cry from being wholly independent. Thus, independence had to be her main priority, and the means to it were going to be a pain in the ass. It was going to be a long road, but she was determined to get to it, sooner or later.

And, last but not least, Kushina Uzumaki had finally come to terms with the fact that she was completely, irrevocably and inadvertently in love with Minato Namikaze, the upcoming musician of the decade. It was a shocking revelation for the young woman, one that she was not prepared to entrust to anyone yet, but it still was there. And, for some weird reason, it calmed her. Minato was a nice kid—that's what he was, no point in denying it—and she had fallen for him, hard. Like she had never fallen for anyone before in her life. She could not ask for a better person to share her time with, and it was heartwarming to know that Minato felt the same way towards her. Though it would take a long time for her to actually mouth those three little words to the childish musician, Kushina was fairly certain that Minato had a clue already.

And so, the pair stood in their coil for a long spell, listening to the rush of the rain hitting the window panes fiercely. Together they relished what they had come so close to losing and quietly vowed to never let it happen again.

It was a promise that neither of them proved to be able to keep but, for the moment, all they could do was hope and believe in the power of their dreams.