Gravity

by myoathkeeper

At that moment, I remember myself thinking, that there was no one else in the whole world that mattered more to me. I could never again live without him – I would rather die. A fanfic that takes place right where New Moon left off...

10. Without You

Author's Note: Hey guys. Yes, I'm sorry I haven't updated in quite awhile. I've been having a long debate with myself on whether or not I was going to continue the story after Eclipse came out. Yes, I have read the book (and it has become my favorite of the series so far – oh my goodness. Ms. Meyer has definitely outdone herself!) but it pretty much negates everything I have written so far and I wasn't sure how many people would be interested in this fan-fiction afterwards. It was initially written just to pass the time before Eclipse came out. Yet, I realized that I started this story for myself and not for others – it's for fun, not profit! So, I've decided I shall go through with my intended storyline with no changes. I hope everyone will appreciate it still and enjoy it. Thank you guys so much for your uplifting comments and all the favorites. It's really been quite a treat. (Yes – this is an updated chapter – more comments at the end of the chapter – enjoy!)

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, and now Eclipse to any degree whatsoever. The rights are the property of Stephenie Meyer only. (I haven't done this in awhile and I felt like I needed too).

Without You

I felt like I was standing in one of those old, black and white movies from the 1930s or 1940s. Before me was a long aisle lined on either side with long benches facing a podium at the front of an enormous room. Several people sat on these benches, most of them I've never seen before in my life. Their faces were rigid, emotionless, placid. They stared, without really seeing, at the front of the room where the podium stood.

The room itself resembled a huge cathedral. Perhaps it was, I wasn't quite sure – the picture flickered and had small lines where it looked like film was weakening to distort the whole image somehow. Behind the podium in the front was a tall, glorious window. It looked like it was made out of stained glass. I glanced down at my feet – I was wearing what appeared to be white high heels, and even though I was walking towards the podium, like a moth drawn to the flame, my feet were not making a single sound on the elegantly tiled floor.

The room was eerie; I did not understand why I was here. But, for some reason, I knew I had to walk up towards the podium – there was something that needed to be done there. Everything seemed to be mysteriously silent except strange, organ music in the background. The tune was faintly familiar, but it was almost as if instinct was telling me not to listen to it too closely. I shut it out, focusing only on the empty podium.

Why was everything so dark? Was it raining outside? Or was it because everything was black and white?

As I approached the podium at the end of the room, I noticed somebody in a black suit standing over to the side, with his back to me. Immediately, I felt elated, like a weight was lifted from my chest. This must not be so bad if he was here.

It was strange though, even though he was here, my heart didn't accelerate because of his presence like it usually did. For a moment, I wondered why that was, but I pushed it aside. I tried to focus on him instead of the podium that somehow hinted at impending doom.

As I approached him, I noticed the room was more opulent that I originally gave it credit for. In every crevice and every corner, carvings of angels and strange demons lavished the walls. There were windows on either side of the room, but outside them everything was dark. No light seemed to escape into the room except that above the podium.

The faces remained apathetic and shadowed, staring forward as I walked pass the rows. Even though they looked forward, it felt like the ones behind me were staring at my back, piercing me with there gaze. I tensed – it was a different kind of tenseness than I've ever had before – more like I was preparing for a battle than anything else. How strange.

I extended my arm out to grab his hand. He took it, without looking at me, and squeezed it tenderly – reassuring me. My lips were trembling, as I looked back to the podium expecting, I did not know.

I tried not to gasp. Behind the podium stood a tall figure whose face was shrouded by a long, white robe. He had a book open in his hands and it looked like he was reading out of it, but I could not hear a word he said. Hesitantly, I turned to the people behind me. They were all still stone faced – except two people in the front row that I was surprised to see. My eyes widened – but my heart did not leap like it usually did.

My parents, Charlie and Renee, sat smiling at me in the front row over to the left. Charlie's crinkly grin made me smile back unsure. Renee looked enthusiastic, so happy that it almost looked as if she was crying.

But then everything became a horror-film.

As I stared at Charlie and Renee, gleeful and smiling, they deteriorated like time was fast-forwarding around us. Their skin sagged and the wrinkles became more pronounced on each of them. They began to hunch forward, withered with age – their hair turning gray, and then bleach white. My mouth dropped at the sight, eyes widening even farther in panic.

And then, before I could do anything, Charlie and Renee slumped forward in each other's laps, still grinning, their eyes closed. I knew they were both dead.

I couldn't do anything. I was frozen to the spot, unable to move, unable to make sense of what was happening. My lips were trembling, and I was letting out cracked, barely recognizable gasps out through my mouth. I knew I was sobbing, but I couldn't hear myself cry – I couldn't even feel any tears on my cheeks.

There was a light sound down at the end of the room where I must have entered. I noticed two huge double doors at the end; the right pulled open slightly where a dark figure entered. He shut the doors and began to walk up the aisle, as I had, and I realized who it was.

Tall and powerful looking, Jacob strolled passed the people in the rows toward where I stood motionless. His skin was darker than the others – but instead of the dark calming brown color I've gotten so used to, it was a dark gray – like everything else in the room.

As he got closer, he didn't seem to want to look directly at me. His hair was long again, and tied back in the ponytail that gave me a ping of nostalgia in the pit of my stomach. Although Jacob constantly appeared to get older every time I laid eyes on him, it was usually not as dramatic as now. He wasn't taller, but aged, like he had seen too much. His eyes looked dull and unfocused and his lips were tight. His features were hard, not like the sun that used to brighten my days that now seemed eons and eons ago. And then I grasped at what he looked like now. Jacob had every characteristic belonging to Sam – the pack leader – showing no emotion, rigid, and old. Why did Jacob look like he was thirty? Why was he here?

Despite the tragedy of moments before, I had the strongest urge to comfort Jacob – I wanted to hold him and talk like we used to. I wanted him to be the sun that wiped away all the clouds of my past life. I didn't want him to be sad – and, with a twinge of hysteria on my part, I did not want him to die like my parents had.

But despite the urge to walk forward and embrace him, it was like I had been plastered to the ground – my legs could not move. I tried to plead to Jake with my eyes, but when he finally chanced to look at me, he stared at me with nothing but hatred in his eyes – and, deep down within them – a pain that I had never been able to fathom before. So deep, I cringed like I had been physically slapped and tortured.

I wanted to scream, but no sound came out.

I wanted to cry, but no tears fell.

I wanted to run, but I was rooted to the ground.

Jacob turned away from me, perhaps disgusted, perhaps trying to hide some other emotion from me. He moved into an aisle – sitting down to dissolve into the crowd of marble faces.

My head twisted back to the person behind the podium, still reading, but I did not know what. I could hear the organ music in the background get louder, but I tried harder to push it away when I noticed a stone basin to the right of the podium. I dropped his hand, like carved ice, and moved like a ghost over to the basin. As soon as I reached it, something clicked in my head – and even though I tried to repress it, it came back to me like an angry fly, demanding attention.

The basin was full of water – used for baptism.

We were in a church.

I stared at the reflection in the water – everything black and white – except the eyes – an alarming color of red. My eyes showed ruby in the water, and my mouth dropped in fright. I could feel my arms shaking, and I noticed how unbelievably pale I looked – almost glowing from it. I was wearing a dress – white and elegant – like something from another century. I clutched at the basin for support and the white gold ring on my left finger glittered in the basin. But I barely noticed it – my eyes showed so vividly back at me.

Without a sound, another reflection appeared in the water. A set of bright, gold eyes joined my blood colored ones in the water. He was smiling at me, I could feel it, but for some reason I could not ignore the image of myself in the water.

I finally understood why my heart remained still.

Time had no effect on me – forever I would be the stone relic of my eighteen year-old self.

The organ music screamed the wedding march in the background.

The urge to yell became uncontrollable. I opened my mouth to shout, but something else escaped my lips entirely.

"I don't know what to do," I murmured quietly.

"You may now kiss the bride," a low voice behind me said.

And he, with his amber eyes, leaned into me, smiling gently to kiss my throat. His lips made the smallest of pressure against my skin.

Something sharp stung me then. There was a slight burning sensation – an old memory tugging at the edges of my mind – and I wanted to scream in fright from whatever it was but I was being clutched in his arms, motionless as marble. His lips parted from me to reveal a crescent shape indentation on my neck – and a droplet of blood that trickled like something forgotten down my throat –

Exactly the same color as my eyes.

I gasped – I wanted to disappear behind a comforting cloud of darkness behind my eyes – but they were open –

And will always be open.

I lifted my right hand and stared at the crescent shaped scar…

"I don't know what to do," he echoed in the distance.

-

There were voices in the distance – soft, quiet, and familiar. The frightening image behind my eyes dissipated – broken up into strange blocks of color and swirls – only to be replaced by the blackness behind my eyelids. My heart was racing still and I tried to calm it as I briefly sprung my eyes open and closed them again.

One glance was all I needed to discover who the voices were coming from. Sitting cross-legged in front of me on the floor was Edward and Alice – talking in low, subdued voices. I knew I had about two seconds until they realized I was awake – but, as long as they didn't notice I was up – I stayed silent and unmoving, biding my time. I knew it was wrong to eavesdrop on conversations, but at the moment I did not want to return to the horror of my dreams – too real in more ways then one…

Did I really ever think about what a wedding implied? Did it ever cross my mind how I would be when I was – like the Cullen's? Could I live without my family? My friends?

Jake?

I gritted my teeth and ignored the thoughts I knew I was going to have to force myself to confront sooner or later… and focused my attention on the two Cullen's who still had not realized I was very much awake on the couch. I wanted to know why Edward was not laying with me anymore.

"I don't know how to keep her safe anymore," I heard Edward say. I realized that it was his voice that snapped me out of my dream at the end. "I don't know what is out there – waiting for us – and I'm scared… No, more than that. I'm terrified."

I tried very hard not gulp or gasp in shock. I was not used to Edward being so utterly open about his inner feelings – in fact, what blew me away, was that I've never really understood what went on in his mind. It was the first time I've heard him so defenseless – since he confessed what he was in the meadow more than a year ago.

There was a knot in my stomach now.

Why could he talk to Alice like this – but not me?

I listened now with a new kind of fervor.

"Edward – all of us are. You have to understand this," Alice responded softly.

There was a moments pause where I sensed either they realized I was awake or they were both reflecting on their thoughts. I tried with all my might not to tense my body because I felt like two pairs of eyes were now staring at it on the couch.

"It's sad really," Edward said slowly with a tinge of his own sadness in his voice. "She thinks I'm perfect… And, although I can't read her mind, I know she comes to this conclusion a lot. But, what she doesn't understand is… that I make more mistakes than she'll ever know of."

"Edward," Alice cooed. "You know what you are? Extremely insecure about yourself – and a tad arrogant – and a bit of a show off at times. Because of the fact that you read minds -," and Alice cut short there – silence. For some reason, I could sense that the rest of her sentence was being communicated to Edward through other means.

"I don't judge people," Edward sighed. "At least – I try not to. I just get to know them in – indirect ways."

"But don't you see Edward? That's it!" Alice said with a harsher tone to her voice, even though they were talking so unbelievably low that I had to strain my ears to hear them properly. "You love Bella because you know her through the way she acts and the way she responds to you and your feelings for her Edward – you love how you can be human with her," Alice deduced on a triumphant note. "Because you are closed to her mind, you can't be prejudice against her – you don't know her through her thoughts, like everyone else – but through her actions. The fact that you can't read her mind puts you in the same situation as everyone else in a relationship – the two of you have confidence in the other's love for one another – faith, if you will. This uncertainty each of you have for the other brings you two closer."

There was a long silence afterwards – both seemed to be processing the words that Alice said.

"Come to think of it," Alice began uncertainly. "It's almost as if she was… made… just for you, Edward. If she didn't have a closed mind – would you still have -?" she seemed reluctant to go on.

Another long pause – I knew that Edward could understand the rest of the question in Alice's head. There was a weird rushing noise coming from somewhere close by. It was raspy and annoying – it made it hard to focus on Edward and Alice's conversation. I wished it would shut up. With a sudden jolt, I realized that it was my own breathing.

Take a deep breath and calm down, I told myself. Try not to blow your cover!

The pause continued. I tried not to count my still frantic heartbeats.

"Yes…" Edward said awkwardly. "The fact that her mind is closed to me is a mystery, indeed – but have you ever thought that it might be closed to me for a different reason? Her thoughts are different than other people – I can feel it. If her mind was not closed to me – she would still be Bella – and her thoughts would still have been different from the rest of the norm. I'm sure they would have intrigued me from the very first day at school – eventually, my curiosity would have gotten the best of me – and I think I would have done exactly the same thing… I don't think there is a day that goes by where I'm not interested in the thoughts of Bella Swan," he finished, full of conviction.

"But you just proved my point, Edward," Alice said. I can hear the frown in her voice. "Still – if Bella's mind was not closed to you – and her thoughts were not different from everyone else – would you still have fallen in love with her?"

"Alice – if her thoughts were not different from everyone else, she wouldn't be Bella. And, it's not just her thoughts – it's her actions too. She is constantly throwing me off guard – and… I'm humbled by that," Edward responded defensively.

"Mmm," was Alice's simple reply. She obviously didn't want to continue this conversation further.

But Icouldn't believe what I was hearing.

What I was hearing didn't seem to correspond correctly with the way I've always perceived Edward to be. Alice considered Edward "insecure" – since when had he acted insecure about himself? He always seemed so certain about everything – was it a mask? How many mistakes does Edward truly make, that I never catch?

My heart throbbed painfully – I realized that the profound love I had for Edward was shrouding the character traits that he loathed about himself. Perhaps the bias I held for Edward was the same kind of bias he held for me.

And the way Alice talked about the kind of relationship Edward and I had – was it truly based off of the fact that my mind was a mystery to Edward and nothing else? Edward was overconfident that he would still have fallen in love with me if my mind was an open book… but I knew that that wasn't true. If he knew my thoughts – wouldn't I just be classified into the whole lot of humans whose lives and thoughts were pointless and meaningless on the grander scale of things?

The knot twisted nauseatingly in my stomach. I knew I had just come to the sickening conclusion, yet again, that Edward was too far out of my league. I'm an idiot and a monster for not only falling in love with someone so beyond me, but for turning away from my family – my friends – just to be with him. I deserved to die in that ballet room in Phoenix so long ago – that way, nothing would have gotten so out of hand – so out of hand, that, I knew I couldn't change my mind. My course was set.

Perhaps that little incident a year ago was a sign.

Alice did see my die in that room… Only the decisions of the people around me that day changed the course of time. If the decisions had not changed, was it fate that I was supposed to die in order to stop this madness from escalating?

I saw Jacob's face. For one wild moment, I pictured him smiling. Would he have liked it better if I died then? So I wouldn't have caused him so much pain and suffering in the future? Liked it because – he knew I would have been spared the kind of future that lied before me now?

His face dissolved before me – with the same tortured expression of my dream.

Why was my heart pounding so fast? I could feel the pressure up to my jaw line – like it was going to collapse. The silence in the room was deafening – my heart seemed way too loud.

"Bella?" Edward said softly. I bit my tongue in response – I was so busted – I don't know why I still wanted to hide the fact that I was awake. Why wouldn't my stupid heart shut up?

"I think she's awake," Alice said dully, although the word "think" in the sentence meant little. If Alice thought I was awake, then she knew I was awake.

I remained still; keeping my eyes closed in what I hoped was a relaxed position, and trying futilely to look like I was still far off in Neverland.

A cold touch on my face almost completely broke my concentration however.

"Bella – are you awake?" Edward breathed in my ear. Suddenly, I felt his entire body squeezed next to mine on the couch, cuddling me like before I fell asleep. I felt his arms wrap around my stomach to pull me closer.

Oh damn. My cover was going to broken in about two seconds unless I came up with something fast. My mind working in overtime, I thought of what Edward and Alice must have heard me mutter in my sleep tonight. Then, with a strange sort of high, I wondered what Edward and Alice would hear now, if I was still asleep.

If my idea did not work, I would be up for teasing and being laughed at now. If it did work, I was going to be laughed and teased at in the morning anyway. Either way, I had to do something. For a brief moment, I wished I wasn't so unbelievably curious about what Edward and Alice were discussing. I mentally kicked myself and then focused on the first word that came to my mind.

"Cheesecake…" I drawled out in what I hoped I sounded like when I was asleep.

I felt a pressure; a humming that evolved into suppressed chuckles coming somewhere close to my neck. Edward was laughing.

I knew it was coming.

Don't blush – don't blush! I yelled at myself.

I knew they would start laughing – but only Edward seemed to be enjoying it. To me the silence from Alice was a little unnerving.

"I don't get it," Alice said slowly, confused. "Is this something the two of you do when she wakes up? And what does 'cheesecake' have to do with it?"

I felt Edward shake his head beside me, still chortling, but more quietly now. "No – Alice, she's not awake."

I could almost hear the puzzlement in Alice's voice. "Yes she is."

Oh! Don't blow it Alice! I shouted in my head, but I knew Alice couldn't hear.

"No – it was a dream she had awhile ago, about making Charlie a cheesecake – which, eventually turned into making him a fishcake. She must be revisiting it again," Edward explained with more muffled laughter.

Alice was silent for a second while Edward tried to compose himself next to me.

"Oh – you had to be there Alice," Edward said, exasperated.

"I'm sure it must have been some dream…" Alice replied finally. She switched the subject abruptly, "So, are you happy about getting married?"

My heart did an aerial flip inside my chest – after what seemed like good fortune on my part for not getting caught, this wasn't exactly the conversation I was looking forward too.

"Alice – you already know the answer to that question – why ask?" Edward said playfully.

"Just want to hear your thoughts for a change," Alice confessed, laughing sweetly.

"Yes, I'm exceptionally happy." And there was no doubt in his voice – Edward's arms held me tighter to his chest as he said so. "Even more so because she actually accepted."

"You're welcome," Alice trilled merrily.

"Yes, thank you Alice – without you, I don't think I'd ever have worked up the courage – I was too afraid I wouldn't like her answer," Edward mused aloud.

"And of course – you'll let me do the wedding," Alice said unabashed.

"Alice – I know for certain Bella does not want a fanfare. It's completely up to her to decide on what she wants to do."

"Oh – that's easy. Bella would love me to do her wedding! I'm sure of it!"

"Don't force her to do anything she doesn't want to," Edward warned.

"Oh, yes of course. But I'm sure Bella would love what I have in mind…"

I tried not to gulp. Whatever Alice was planning, I'm sure it was going to make this whole wedding business ten times more horrible.

"And there's that other part of the deal – what you promised her in return for marriage," Alice contemplated aloud. "Are you really going to do it Edward?" Alice asked, serious now.

"As much as I don't want to… yes, I will. That's part of the deal, after all…" Edward sighed sorrowfully at the end. "I've been trying not to think about that little detail however – at least, not tonight."

"I know, Edward. But, you have to see there is no other way. What are you concerned about?"

Silence. Eventually it was broken when Edward answered in his quick, train-of-thought way of his.

"Not only am I concerned about the people that Bella is connected to – her family and her friends…" he shuddered slightly at the last part, "But, most of all, Alice, I'm concerned that I'm being too selfish for allowing this to happen to her. For me, I know this is what I want, more than the whole world over – more than the entire universe. Without her with me, I don't know what I'd do. But for her -," there was a pause, where he said miserably, "- I want so much more. She could do so much better than me."

Another long silence between the two of them. I resisted the urge to scream out loud. The conversation was beginning to be too much for me. I didn't know if I could stand anymore of it. Maybe I should stop acting like I'm asleep and actually go back to sleep.

"I know Alice," Edward's voice eventually broke the stillness. "I know that all too well – the vision you had so long ago. You think it is fate – because that is how you perceive the world around you – how decisions affect the outcome – and how you found Jasper. But Alice," his tone became silky as he said, "Perhaps it is just love."

It was quiet for a long time – not the awkward, tense quiet of previous times before – it was a calming quiet – a peaceful one. It seemed that they were both digesting Edward's words. The atmosphere was relaxed – and, without knowing it, I felt my heart beat return to a steady rhythm and my body unwind slowly.

It was Alice that broke the silence this time.

"I'm thinking that a peach theme would be good – and having it outside somewhere…"

"Oh Alice – don't start that again!" Edward hissed. I could tell he was rolling his eyes.

"Don't you see the possibilities? Or, do you want to go more traditional? Black and white, I suppose?"

Edward sighed. "Talk to Bella about it."

"Well, what's your opinion?" Alice edged.

I didn't want to listen to them argue anymore. In the morning, however, I desperately needed to talk to Edward alone. There were things I needed to discuss with him.

Like his part of the deal for one.

And marriage… ew.

And finally – why couldn't he be as open with me as he is with Alice?

Their voices were too soft and musical to sound harsh and annoyed anymore, so I pretended that they were some sort of background music – turned on to help me fall asleep.

"Honestly, I'll do anything Bella is willing too. If that means driving to Vegas…"

"Oh no you don't! You'll never forgive yourself if you do that!"

"Watch me."

The bickering continued, but it was so distant, so beautiful that I felt myself slipping away into an actual slumber. Before I fell completely under, I hoped fruitlessly that I slept dream free.

-

Just as I expected, I woke up feeling groggy and unkempt. I could feel the wild tangles in my hair before I even opened my eyes. As soon as I had fallen back to sleep that night, I was continually visited by dreams – some just as vibrant as my nightmare before – others flashes of images that didn't seem to make much sense to me. I did not know if these flashes were either happy or sad – nightmares or not. But I knew I was going to be terrified to go back to sleep tonight – afraid to find out for sure.

I blinked my eyes opened, only to shut them quickly again. The light radiating from the southern window of Edward's bedroom was not only startling, but blinding. I couldn't believe it was a sunny day, despite all the drama of the previous night. I rolled over, searching for the cool hands that had to be somewhere. When I couldn't find them, I rolled back over on my side again only to – PLOP!

"Ow!" I shouted a bit too loudly.

I was lying on Edward's golden carpet; I had fallen off the couch. Sitting up, I rubbed the back of my head, which received most of the impact. Despite the brightness of the room, I forced my eyes open so that they would adjust to it. Looking around, I noticed everything in the room was just as I had remembered it from last night. Except that neither Alice nor Edward was in the room with me – I frowned, a little heartbroken that both seemed to have left me.

They must be downstairs, I thought.

As soon as that thought crossed my mind, the door to Edward's room slammed open. With a jolt of adrenaline, I jumped to my feet in surprise.

"Well – it's about time sleepyhead!"

I exhaled and slumped back onto the couch behind me as Alice crossed the room to sit next to me. For some reason, she seemed positively euphoric about something. She was dressed in clothes that reflected her perky-ness.

"Alice, you nearly gave me a heart attack," I said, dazed.

"You've got to have a little more confidence in me than that, Bella," Alice intoned, rolling her eyes. "Trust me; I would have seen if you had a heart attack."

"It's a figure of speech," I mumbled, rubbing my eyes.

Alice snorted.

"Where's Edward?" I asked eventually. I needed to talk to him – now.

Alice ignored that. "Sleep well last night?" she asked, a hint of sarcasm to her voice.

My eyes bolted open, alarmed. She did seem skeptical last night, after Edward reassured her that I was asleep… Better play the dumb, innocent type.

"Yeah – I guess – I just fell off the couch this morning. I probably look a tad deranged," I added the last line playfully. The nervous laugh afterwards blew my cover however.

"Liar," Alice grinned, raising an eyebrow.

"Excuse me?" I blinked.

"You may have been able to fool Edward, but you certainly didn't fool me."

I gave her a confused look.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh stop it Bella. You don't have to pretend anymore."

"Oh darn it!" I muttered, aggravated. "But – how could you have know – and Edward not have?"

"Edward doesn't understand half of the visions I have – sure, he can see them all with me and hear the kind of things I have to say about them in my head – but it's still my head and my thoughts. He might not even understand where my thoughts originated from. Furthermore -," and Alice turned to me, grinning, "I've had plenty of time to learn how to repress the thoughts I do not want him to hear. As soon as we sensed you were awake, and after I had acknowledged the fact aloud and you did not respond, I decided to play along and shrug off the vision I had of you returning to consciousness."

She beamed at me, feeling proud of herself for reading my intentions correctly. "So – I let you eavesdrop. But really, Bella, I'm extremely curious as to why you did." She gazed at me with her amber eyes brimming with anticipation.

I swallowed, not sure how to respond.

"Oh come on Bella! I won't tell him, if that's what you're worried about."

"It's not like you have a choice in that matter. He's going to find out sooner or later," I snorted.

Alice sighed. "Yes – well, don't you want to tell Edward himself that you eavesdropped, instead of him learning about it indirectly from me?"

"Yes – I wanted to talk to him alone about it this morning actually," I confessed.

"About what part?"

"All of it… Like, for one, why can he talk with you so freely and not me?" I asked, a bit bitter at the end.

Alice's eyebrows creased as she thought about that. Then she said, "Although Edward and I aren't actually related, in a lot of ways, we act like siblings to each other. So, for example, what a person cannot say or express to his or her parents, girlfriend or boyfriend, or friends – they find it easier to talk about with their brother or sister. That's exactly what Edward did last night – talked with me in confidence about his inner feelings."

"Then, why did you allow me to listen with you?" I questioned.

"Because I thought you, like me, had a right to know for once what was going on in his mind," she replied mischievously. Then she sighed. "Also, Bella, although he would never tell you this…" she paused, and clamped her mouth shut, afraid she had said too much.

"What?" I pried, my heart pounding.

Her eyes flicked towards me, a hard edge to them. She sighed again, relenting. "He's terrified of losing you."

I rolled my eyes. "I already know that – that's why he made me stay here last night instead of letting me go home to Charlie and –"

I stopped short. Alice was shaking her head vigorously.

"No – not like that Bella – although, he is equally afraid of that as well…" Alice allowed, nodding solemnly.

My eyebrows creased. "Then – what do you mean?"

"I mean, that Edward is afraid that you will leave him," Alice explained anxiously.

I stared at Alice for a long time – I didn't know my mouth was hanging open until Alice put her index finger under my jaw and closed it for me. As soon as she did so I seemed to regain some sense.

"But – why – would he even – think that? Of all the preposterous ideas-! I mean, he should know how much I need him after seeing how I was like when we came back from Italy!" I blurted out, suddenly furious.

Alice frowned. "But, you see Bella, that's why he is afraid. After seeing what he did to you, leaving you alone for so long, he feels absolutely guilty and ashamed about it. He feels like after that episode, he owes more to you then he would ever be able to repay back – and that you have more than one reason to leave him because of what he did…

"Furthermore, he feels that it makes more sense if you leaved him because you have so much more going for you if he wasn't apart of it… For example, the new… friend… you made while we were away," Alice grimaced.

"Jake?" I said, raising an eyebrow at Alice. Obviously, she was still annoyed at the little fact that she could not determine his future – or the rest of the packs for that matter. That or she was extremely prejudiced against the werewolves.

Based on the expression on her face, I'd say it was both.

She glared at me and opened her mouth to say something, before closing it again. She nodded tightly.

"Although I hate to admit it – he is a bit more human than us…"

It was silent for a second – to me, Jacob was just as different from a human as the Cullen's were. I saw the giant russet wolf staring at me in the field – the red creature that sprung to life in mid-air in order to ward off the gray wolf coming towards me – I acknowledged his brute strength, his silent walk, and his hard expression…

"Anyway," Alice said. "Yes, Edward is doubtful of his hold on you. You see, Bella, it's very hard for vampires to experience a change of heart. When he met you, it changed him permanently. There is no going back. But, he knows that, since you are human, you still have a chance to change your mind… And, because he can't read your mind like everyone else, his doubts are amplified considerably. Bella – he needs you more than you know," Alice concluded.

"I'm his," I said sheepishly, looking at the floor now.

"I know," Alice smiled. "I've known for a long time – probably even longer than you knew yourself." She laughed and continued. "I also think Edward's afraid of scaring you with his thoughts – that they would push you farther away from him."

"Huh? Why would his thoughts scare me?" I asked, puzzled.

"Because he hears the thoughts of others, he's able to focus on more than one thing at a time, and I believe it makes his own thoughts a bit more complex than others – more like a vampire than anything else. He doesn't want to frighten you with what he truly is."

"I'm not afraid," I said defiantly to Alice.

"I know, Bella. Trust me, I know," Alice said, chuckling slightly. "But, you're going to have to tell that to Edward – he never believes it from me, no matter how many times I've told him the truth. He's convinced that, at least, any normal human being -," she rolled her eyes at me and continued, "- has to find something about us absolutely horrifying."

"I don't. You guys are like family to me," I said, kicking the other more emotionally stringed thoughts in my head away before they could form sentences through my mouth.

"To me Bella, you are already my family," and then she pulled me into a stony embrace. I hugged back, relishing in the fragrance that floated off her shoulder. Then I felt her hand slide down my left arm and grab onto my wrist. Before I knew it, the embrace was over and she was examining my left hand – more importantly, observing with quiet interest the small white gold ring on my finger.

"Ha – I knew it," she said, a supercilious grin forming on her lips as she stared at my hand.

I groaned and pulled my hand away from her. I had forgotten the hideous thing was still on there. "That's another reason why I want to talk to Edward." And, with more deliberateness than was totally necessary, I pulled the ring from off my finger. Alice stared at me, wide-eyed. I could tell she suppressed a gasp.

"Bella – what are you doing?"

"Alice – I already accepted the proposal, calm down. Where's Edward?" I asked as I looked around the room for a place to put the ring – I didn't want to keep it on my finger or have it anywhere close to my house where Charlie could come across it. Or worse – Charlie question me about it. "I just want to keep it safe here. I don't want to lose it."

Alice groaned and held out her hand. "Just give it to me Bella – he's not going to be happy about this when he finds out." The edges of her mouth turned downwards when she thought of that. "Don't worry though – I'll keep it safe."

I plopped the ring into her open hand and she closed her fingers around it.

"You still haven't answered my previous question," I prodded.

"All the guys have gone hunting big game for the day – Edward wanted to stay with you, but it's such a nice day today. Nobody wanted to miss the opportunity." Alice's once placid expression suddenly became unbelievably animated. "It's just you and me Bella -," she made a gesture that suggested that the whole world was open to us.

"What about Esme and Rosalie?"

"Oh, yes, they're here too," Alice frowned and made a face. I was obviously missing something important.

"Darn – I wanted to talk to him…" I muttered instead.

"Oh come on Bella!" Alice nearly shouted at me, exasperated. "Who wants to talk to Mr. Crabby-pants anyway? Won't you please come shopping with me?" Then she was winking at me. "You know, you could get something for Edward while we're out."

My mouth dropped open again. She was absolutely right – I had never considered the fact that I truly needed to get Edward something in return for what he gave me – even though it wasn't what I really wanted. However, the money left in my college fund was starting to look more like a kid's savings account. But the tone of her voice made it sound like I had already accepted the invite to go shopping and it set me off in my stubborn mode.

"Alice – I don't think I accepted going shopping with you," I hissed. "Besides, what would Charlie think? I need to go home. He's probably worried sick about me."

"Oh silly! I already called Charlie this morning!" Alice flashed me an angelic smile.

"I don't – wait – you – what?!" I shouted.

"I called Charlie for you!" She said again, grinning wider.

"But – wait…," I shook my head, confused. "I thought he wanted me home as soon as possible this morning!"

"Well, I asked him very politely what time he wanted you home today and he said no later than four or five tonight."

"Alice," I tried to keep my voice controlled. "Please don't tell me you begged him or anything?"

"No – I just said that I desperately needed someone to shop for graduation clothes with me today, that's all…"

I frowned – I wasn't buying it.

"I also told him Edward and all the boys were going to be gone the whole day and that Esme was going to be with us too," she confessed. She gazed at my expression and said, "Which is true!"

"Yes – but now I know why Charlie allowed me to go," I sighed. "I'm surprised he's being as lenient as he is."

"I think it's because he knows that you're a pretty good kid, compared to the rest of the teenage population."

"I'm not so sure about that," I murmured quietly to myself.

"So – are you coming? Please?" Alice stuck her bottom lip out in a pout.

I stared at her, shell-shocked that she was able to carry out the whole "sleep-over" charade with Charlie this long already. Inside my head, I knew the real reason why I was still stuck at the Cullen's – my whole body was shaking with the effort of trying to repress it, but it was there in my head, begging to be set free.

They're holding me captive – trying to keep me safe.

With that realization, I no longer wanted to be here at the Cullen's, being babysat like a troublesome kid. I wanted to be liberated – I wanted my rights that allowed me to go my own route. And that meant checking up on Charlie.

My mouth opened in preparation for protest, when Alice intervened.

"Of course, Charlie said that before you do anything, you have to call him first. He has something important to tell you." Her expression became blank after she told me this – for a brief moment, she looked almost irritated – but the look was removed from her face only to be replaced by a huge encouraging smile.

I blinked. My objection to her invite to the mall was merely based on the fact that I didn't know for sure Charlie was safe and because she seemed to be holding me hostage. Maybe I was overanalyzing the situation – maybe it was just Alice being Alice and wanting to go shopping just like any other day.

Instead of accepting or accusing Alice, I just narrowed my eyes at her. "Hand me the phone then," I said.

In faster than I thought possible, Alice shot like a bullet out of the room and back in again with a small, black, cordless phone. I took the phone out of her hand and dialed my home number. With a quick glance at Alice, I mouthed the words with mild interest, "What time is it?"

She responded in a soft voice, "Almost eleven."

My eyes widened – I had slept longer than I expected. Just then, there was a click on the other end of the line.

"Hello?" Charlie said.

"Hey dad, it's me."

"Bells! Hun – I'm so glad you called, I was beginning to worry. Are you already at the mall?"

"Uh – no, I just woke up," I mumbled.

"Oh – wow, you must have had some night last night. Alice sounded really excited about taking you out today on the phone this morning. She told me you were still asleep this morning when she called around eight to ask me permission herself."

"Yeah – she's very excited," I gave Alice a look and sighed softly. "We'll be leaving for the mall soon."

Alice looked like she was going to start bouncing in her seat from happiness. I ignored her. "I'm very surprised you're allowing me to go. Aren't you taking this 'one day to herself' thing a little far? Don't I still owe you?"

"Yeah – you still owe me," Charlie grunted. I could tell he was putting a lot of effort into trying to sound strict. "But enjoy the day while you can. You have exams to study for tomorrow and chores to do okay?"

I tried to suppress a groan but failed. Charlie chuckled on the other end.

"So, what is it you need to tell me? Alice said there was something important -?"

"Yes – Jacob called earlier."

My mouth dropped open at his name – and my heart clung to it like a lifeline. It felt like a millennium since I last talked to Jacob or seen him. It surprised me that, in truth, it had only been two days. Why did it seem so much longer than that?

"Ja-Jacob?" I stuttered, still stunned.

Alice scowled at the name.

"He called? Did something happen? Is he okay?" I spluttered out – trying to sound calm. Suddenly, the memory of the pale-girl on the road made me almost lose my grip on the phone.

Jacob can't be hurt – he can't be!

"Yeah Bella, he's fine," Charlie said, shocked at my tone. "Is there something I should know about?" he asked, suddenly curious.

"Uh – no, I was just – amazed he called. I've been trying to get a hold of him for so long and he hasn't been returning my calls. I just assumed something must have been seriously wrong for him to respond…" I lied quickly.

"No – actually, he seemed to be extremely worried about you Bella – for some reason. I tried to ask him what was bugging him – but he just said that it was important that he got a chance to talk to you soon. I told him not to worry. Bella – is something wrong?"

I had not noticed my breathing was rougher than normal. I tried to control myself and assume the reassuring mode that suddenly seemed to be running my life.

"Yeah – nothings wrong. I'm going to call Jacob and see what's up okay?"

"Okay Bella. Call me if you need anything – otherwise I'll see you later tonight."

"Okay – thanks. I love you so much Dad," I said strongly at the end, my thoughts suddenly zooming in on the disturbing nightmare I had last night.

Charlie seemed temporarily taken aback at my show of emotion, but said smoothly. "I love you too Bells. Bye hun."

"Bye," I said and hung up.

I could feel myself shaking as my thoughts whizzed past me at a mile a minute.

Is Jake okay?

Did something happen in La Push that he suddenly decided to call me?

If Jake's okay, is one of the others hurt?

Did they figure out the identity of the mysterious vampires after me?

Alice was watching me with a concerned expression on the couch.

"Bella – are you okay?" she asked.

"Me? Oh – yeah. I'm – I'm going to call Jake okay?" I watched Alice's face change immediately from concern to annoyance. I jumped up from the couch and stumbled to Edward's door, with the phone in one hand. When I reached the door, I put my other hand on the doorknob and turned to Alice. "And there's no way you're going to stop me calling him Alice, so quit it with the expression. I'm not going to run away either – I'm just going to the bathroom so I could have a little privacy – are you okay with that?" I added, trying to sound tough.

Alice's eyes narrowed, but she nodded tightly. With that, I twisted the doorknob and made my way to the closest bathroom on the third level.

Although the Cullen's did not need bathrooms in the house, it's not like they could get rid of them. And, like Alice's bathroom, the one on the upper level was just as elaborate. It was elegantly decorated – the walls painted a dark burgundy, with the floor and cabinets in a dark cherry-wood color. I locked the door behind me and sat myself on the toilet seat, staring at the phone. My hand was shaking as I dialed Jacob's number.

After one ring, he answered.

"Hello?" I heard Jake say on the other end. He sounded like he was out of breath.

"Jake?"

"Bella – oh God – you're okay!" he sounded genuinely relieved. Immediately a shot of adrenaline ran through my veins.

"Yes – of course I'm okay! Oh man – what happened Jacob?"

There was some panting, and then he said, "Sorry – I'm a bit tired – give me a sec."

I gave him the second to rest – but it felt like a year. I was biting my nails, impatient as I was.

"Okay – Bella – we need to talk – face to face," he said, an edge to his voice.

"What? Oh Jacob – are you okay?" It felt like my head was going to explode.

"Yeah, I'm fine Bella!" he snapped impatiently. "Quit worrying about me."

I felt my mouth drop open and I struggled to regain some composure.

"I'm sorry. I just thought – well, Charlie said it was an emergency. I was worried something happened to you," I said finally.

He sighed. "Yeah well…" he paused, trying to figure out where to start. "Look – Bella. We need to talk – as soon as possible."

"Okay – we'll talk now!" I said, annoyed.

"I mean face to face," Jacob replied, almost snidely.

"I – I don't think that's possible – not today," I bit my lip.

"Oh – I get it – they're holding you captive now, right?" Jacob said, bitterly sarcastic at the end.

"How do you know where I am?" I demanded.

"I called Charlie – remember?"

"Oh yeah. Well – if you call going to the mall being held captive, be my guest," I said, miffed. I remembered when I thought that previously – but I didn't want him to be right about it. I didn't want to believe it.

"They're taking you – to the mall? The one in Port Angeles?" he sounded stunned.

"No – the one in Seattle. Of course the one in Port Angeles!" I snorted. Then I realized I was taking my uneasiness out on Jacob, when I should be happy I was having this opportunity to talk to him. The nightmare came into sharp focus once again.

"Wait – sorry – that was rude. I'm actually really glad to be talking to you right now Jacob. I've missed you. And – a lot has been going on," I said softly to him on the phone.

It was silent for a second on the other end of the phone. Then, he said slowly, a bit unnerved, "It's okay Bella… It's not like I don't deserve at least some of it. And you're right – a lot has been going on. That's why I need to talk to you – not on the phone however. I don't want any of your leeches listening in."

"A-hem," I coughed, irritated.

"Okay – whatever – the Cullen's. Are they in the room with you now?"

"No… I… I locked myself in the bathroom actually."

Suddenly, there was a boom of laughter on the other end. I felt my cheeks go hot as Jacob fought to control his hysterics.

"What?" I challenged.

"It's just – man – Bella. You locked yourself in a bathroom? You mean they actually have one of those?"

"Yeah well – what would you tell your real estate agent when you want an eight bedroom house but with no bathrooms? Jeez Jake!" I said, exasperated.

"It's not that Bella," he said, gaining some control back. "It's just – well – you know that a lock on a bathroom door is not going to stop them from getting in, right?"

"Yeah – well – the least they could do is show a little decency and not bother me while I'm in here."

"Sure, sure," Jacob said. "'Course they'd do that, because they're decent and everything…"

"I'm rolling my eyes Jacob – just so you know," I muttered as I rolled my eyes.

"Thanks for the update," Jacob said. He suddenly seemed much lighter now. "But, seriously now – we need to talk – just because you think they're decent, doesn't mean they are. They could be eavesdropping for all I know."

"Jake!"

"Anyway – have fun at the mall. Still can't believe they're taking you there – stupid bloodsuckers…"

"Hey – Jacob – come on," I gritted my teeth, trying desperately not to get mad at him. But then there was a click on the other end and the line went dead.

"Wait a second!" I shouted into the already dead phone. Angry, and wanting to know what the hell was going on, I stomped to the bathroom door, jerked it open and marched back to Edward's room.

Alice was still sitting on his couch, her posture rigid, just like it was before I left her. She eyed me without emotion.

"How'd it go?" she asked flatly.

"Wonderful," I nearly barked at her. I threw the phone back to Alice who caught it with ease. I walked once around the room looking for a knapsack or something that I figured I must have brought over with my clothes. Then I remembered (with a sickening twist of my stomach) what I was wearing when I fell asleep last night. I gulped and looked down. Yep – I was still wearing Alice's "pajamas."

"Argh!" I yelled and flung my hands down to pull the lingerie back over my head.

"Hey – hey!" Alice said, catching my hand before I ripped the white, skimpy dress off. "Watch it – this is still mine you know. I would appreciate it very much if you didn't rip it." She was silent for a second as she absorbed my expression. She opened her mouth to say something, thought against it, and closed her mouth. The next time she opened her mouth she said, "Would you like to borrow some clothes, Bella?"

I just nodded slightly, staring straight ahead into the Cullen's backyard.

"Okay – don't worry. I know exactly what to give you," Alice said, walking fluidly out of the room.

Yes, of course you know what I want, I thought darkly. At least you're certain about everything – it's so easy for you.

I wish I could be so sure about what's going on in my life now.

-

I was staring distractedly at a huge zit on my forehead. I couldn't remember the last time I had one this huge since I was a least sixteen – maybe when I was seventeen. But here was this big red blotch on my forehead that was annoying the heck out of me. What was worse was that I pretty much knew what it was the product of – stress, stress, stress, and even more stress. It was times like these where I usually questioned myself. So while I picked and prodded at the zit on my forehead in the front seat mirror of Rosalie's car – I thought about my life.

What I discovered was that my life was determined by two factors. And the two factors – didn't get along so well. These factors I've been trying to push together for so long, but every time I try, every time I take that one extra step, I'm always blown off course again and again. I knew I just had to think and focus harder, find a way around the opposition the two factors had for one another, but it seemed like my opportunities continued to thin and thin – while a huge unknown, danger loomed in the distance…

I was looking too much into Jacob's conversation on the phone, I realized. I was so caught up – trying to figure out what was wrong, why he called, that I was picking at the zit was a strange sort of vigor. I noticed Esme chance a side glance at me from the driver's seat. I could tell she was troubled but she was trying not to express it. Alice sat in the back seat – she was upbeat, glad to finally get to shop with her life-sized doll.

Rosalie wanted to stay at home. Even when I got up the courage to ask her if she wanted to join us, she said she wanted to watch the house and wait for the boys to come back. She seemed almost nervous for some reason – which made me feel ten times worse than I already felt. To top off all my strains of the day, I was wearing one of Alice's slightly too-tight jeans and deep blue spaghetti-strap shirt. If I could choose to go anywhere today, I'd want to go home, check on Charlie, and change into some of my own clothes.

"Bella – if you squeeze that anymore it's going to-," Alice began.

Splat!

The zit popped to my utter amazement. I was so focused on my own thoughts that I had not realized I was still attacking the zit absent-mindedly.

"Oh," I said, as the zit began to ooze blood.

Suddenly the car lurched forward as it screeched to a halt. Esme was over the steering wheel, taking deep breaths – Alice's white hand popped out of nowhere with a band-aid.

"Oh how in the world did I know that I would need to bring the first aide kit with me?" Alice said with false concern.

"I'm so sorry Bella dear," Esme said, struggling to smile reassuringly. "I – I didn't mean to slam on the brakes."

"I know. I'm the one who should be apologizing. I honestly didn't realize that I was… well…" I hesitated to go on. "Obviously, I have a lot on my mind, that's all."

I took the band-aid from Alice, ripped it open, and put it over the popped zit. It made a nice little addition to the other bandage on my head from the events of last night. I grimaced at my image in the mirror and slammed it back up onto the ceiling. I was so bandaged up and bruised – like damaged goods almost. Perhaps it meant something was wrong with my head – or perhaps it was just a good representation of my own heart.

Esme's hand patted my knee. "I know – we all have a lot on our mind. But I'm sure your friend is okay. You should only be worrying about you."

Better said than done, I thought, narrowing my eyes at the road as Esme cautiously continued on her way to Port Angeles in Rosalie's car.

-

Today I learned that I can be extremely claustrophobic.

Take the amount of people at the Port Angeles mall yesterday, double it, then add another hundred, and I swear you would have the amount of people here today.

Everyone was here to make the most of the weekend. After the sunshine of the morning, low clouds began to move into view from the north – they looked like nothing at first glance – but if you stared at the sky long enough, you would swear that more and more clouds kept coming.

I grimly tolerated Alice's enthusiasm as she dragged me to every "hip" clothing and accessory store she could find. Whenever she handed me something to try on or ask my opinion on, I would just smile, nod, and do what I thought was appropriate. If she wanted me to try on a shirt, I would do it. If she asked if a shirt looked good on her, I would say it did.

"Bella, this is a yellow-green shirt with holes around the breasts," Alice said, appalled, after she asked for my input on yet another shirt.

"Huh – what? It does?" I finally forced myself to focus on the shirt. Sure enough, there were circular rips around the boobs that followed in two vertical lines down both sides of the shirt. Apparently, you either needed an undershirt for this ensemble, or if you wore it without anything underneath you would be showing quite a lot. Doing a quick glance at my surroundings, it appeared that we were in some sort of urban designer store – many of the items had extremely vibrant coloring to them.

"Oh," I said dumbly at my realization.

Alice closed her eyes and shook her head. She hung the strange shirt back on its rack. "I knew you weren't paying attention! Could you at least pretend that you're having fun? For me?"

"I thought I was," I replied honestly.

"No – it was strange. I've never seen you like this – it was like you were somewhere else entirely. Yes, you were here physically, but…" she frowned at me, not finishing her sentence.

I tried not to look horror-struck at what Alice said, but I realized that, as soon as we got to the mall, I had lapsed into my numb state that had kept me functioning for about seven months of my life.

"Okay – we need to get you engaged somehow," Alice mused aloud looking around. I noticed Esme by a rack of ostentatious looking pink leather pants; I tried not to gasp when she actually appeared slightly interested in buying a pair. Suddenly, Alice poked me in the shoulder.

"What?" I asked, alarmed.

"You need to shop!" she replied seriously.

"I thought that was what we were doing!"

"Not for you – but for Edward," she corrected.

I blinked. She was right. I needed to start looking for things in this mall somewhere that, one, I could afford, and two, that he might like.

I had no idea where to even start.

I looked at Alice with a blank expression – which I hope she interpreted as "help me."

"Come on – I think I know where we could start." She took my hand and started to drag me out of the store. Esme saw us pass and followed.

Forty-five minutes later, we were exiting yet another clothing store that was way beyond my price range. It was the same at every store – even the music stores we visited. I was so frustrated that I wanted to punch something. In the beginning, Alice said she would be happy to have bought his gift for me – or that she would pay half and I would pay the other half. Esme agreed too that she would be willing to offer anything to help. However, this just made me even more annoyed. I refused their offers, saying over and over again that if I was going to get something for Edward, I wanted to pay for it myself.

It was inching toward one-thirty when my stomach growled mercilessly. My eyes widened – I did not feel hungry at all today and the fact that my stomach was moaning in complaint shocked me. Clutching my stomach quickly, I hoped that Alice and Esme didn't notice. Just as quickly, I discovered that was a stupid hope.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Bella!" Esme said sympathetically. "I forgot – you need to eat. Do you want to stop at the food court now?"

"No – that's okay. It's not that bad really…"

Another loud groan from my stomach was interrupted when Alice suddenly stopped outside a store. She was looking inside with interest.

"Can your stomach wait a little longer Bella?" Alice asked serenely. "Real quickly, I want to peek inside here."

My eyes appraised the store. The windows were adorned with pink lace, pink stuffed dogs, bikini underwear, corsets entwined with black ribbon, and fluffy looking pink slippers. I gaped at the site. There was only one store that I knew had all this stuff in it.

"Oh yes – Victoria's Secret," Esme said smiling. She began to walk to where Alice was standing outside the door. I, on the other hand, remained rooted to the spot, staring after them.

"Are you coming Bella?" Alice asked, staring at me.

"Uh – you know what – I'm just going to sit outside. I'll wait for you guys out here when you're done, okay?" I said, trying not to grimace. In truth, I didn't want them to know how horror-struck I was that both of them were going to go inside. I knew there were other things in Victoria's Secret besides promiscuous merchandise, but after all the times my mother had dragged me into that store on many of her own little expeditions, I didn't want to relive some of those "remarkable" memories.

Alice looked between the store and back at me a couple of times – obviously determining whether it was okay to leave me alone or not. She gave me a hard glare.

"Don't move from that bench there. It'll be both of our heads if anything happens to you. We'll be watching from inside."

With that, Alice disappeared into the store, while Esme said, "Yes Bella – do be careful – none of us want anything to happen to you." Then she stepped inside too.

I sighed – the way they talked to me made me feel like I was five years old and being left for the first time on my own.

I sat on the brown bench directly outside of the store. I thought bitterly of the many disappointments I had trying to find Edward a gift. What was something I could afford that he could really love? Something worthy – something so fantastic that it could compensate for my inadequate self?

Think Bella. What is something he would really enjoy? What would he love to get from you?

My thoughts drifted to my eighteenth birthday where I had asked for nothing and ended up getting more than I deserved. Then I remembered Edward's gift – a CD of his own compositions that he had made just for me…

And it didn't cost him a thing.

A stroke of inspiration hit me then.

I grabbed one of the several bags Alice had me carrying and rummaged around inside of them. I pushed back several articles of clothing until I found it – a short, thin, white slip of paper – the receipt. It was flimsy and would probably tear easily, but it was the best I could do considering the circumstances. I examined the items on it briefly and suppressed a scowl when I realized exactly how much Alice had indulged me on. With that, I flipped the paper over to the blank side and began to grope through the purse that Alice let me borrow and contained the remnants of my purse from last night.

Oh come on – come on! There has to be a pen in here somewhere!

After a minute of fumbling through the bag, sure enough, there was a small, sleek, shiny black pen at the bottom. I smiled, popped off its cap, and began to write smoothly on the back of the receipt…

You've stolen my heart,

Right from the start,

Now I'm yours to keep,

Locked in your gravity…

I was not one for poetry. I barely wrote any poetry in my life, except for school projects or something like that. But the sudden inspiration to write something poetic caught me off guard. After about two stanzas of writing and scratching out lines, I felt a tap on my shoulder. Looking up, I expected to see Alice or Esme telling me they were ready to leave. Instead, I saw nobody in front of me. Nervously, I glanced around. Before I could look on the bench sitting behind me, I received another jab on my left shoulder. Frightened, I was about to get up and actually go into Victoria's Secret with the rest of the crew, until I heard a "psssst" behind me.

My heart rate accelerated dramatically. Whoever uttered the "pssst" behind me could be either friend or foe. But the instinct part of my brain decided not to take any chances. Opening my mouth I was about to yell, when –

"Bella – don't yell! It's Jake!" he hissed from behind me.

My eyes widened in relief as well as in surprise. I was about to turn around when he said, "No! Bella – don't turn your head – I'm trying to look inconspicuous. I don't want your friends to know I'm here."

I took a second to process that and then said softly, "Then, how do I know you really are Jacob?"

"Because – dang – Bella, you stink," Jake said. Even though he was whispering, I could still hear the disgust in his voice.

"Thanks Jake," and I couldn't stop from smiling then. Trying to look casual, I picked up Alice's purse and shoved the pen and the receipt with the poem on it inside. Then, when I was placing the purse inside a bag next to me on the bench, I turned my head slightly to see Jacob sitting there, shrinking low in the bench behind me in order not to look so tall. He wasn't doing a good job, no matter how low he was in the seat, his legs jutted far off the bench to make up for it. I noticed he was wearing all black, which surprised me some. I lounged back on the bench, and turned to face Victoria's Secret again.

"Jacob – what are you doing here?" I asked quietly, trying not to move my lips too much.

"Well, I thought it was kind of stupid of them to bring you here when you have more than nine vampires trying to get you."

I tried to hide my panic at this news. "What do you mean – more than nine vampires?"

"Bella," he said, serious now. "After you told me where you were going to be today on the phone, I followed you. We really need to talk."

"Okay, then talk!" I said, trying not to look too irritated.

"Not here though."

"Well Jake," I said, excruciatingly sarcastic now. "I'm on a really tight schedule – you're going to have to give me a time and place and I'll see if I can squeeze you in."

"Bella – look – if we talk here I'll look suspicious!" Jacob said, annoyed.

He wasn't the only one annoyed.

"It's not like I can do this some other time. I'm being watched all the time," I said ruefully.

"I just need you for ten minutes. Can you get away from them for at least ten minutes?"

"That's really stretching it," I replied bitterly.

"Five minutes then?"

I stared at my folded hands on my knees and was revisited by the time I got away from Alice and Jasper at the Phoenix airport. It wasn't like I was in a much different situation – the mall on a Saturday was crowded and filled with nooks and crannies one could hide in. However, the last time I ran away from my protectors, the whole scenario did not turn out exactly as I planned. What if this wasn't any different?

"I'll… try. But, I'm honestly not guaranteeing anything. I don't know this mall as well as I know the airport," I said dreamily.

"The airport? What are you talking about?" Jake asked, puzzled.

"Oh – sorry. I guess I was thinking out loud." My eyebrows furrowed in concentration as I ran through possible "escape for five minutes" scenarios. After an awkward minute of silence, it hit me.

"Jacob," I said quietly.

"Yeah?"

"She can't see you!" I said jubilantly.

"Okay – you've lost me."

"Alice! She can't see you! In her visions!"

"What do you mean 'she can't see me'?"

"Alice – when she sees the future. She can't see the future of you or your entire pack for that matter. We don't know why exactly – but werewolves seem to be immune to her gift!" I muttered to him quickly, feeling pleased with myself.

"Are you serious?" Jacob said ecstatically. "Why didn't you tell me this before?"

"I guess I forgot," I said honestly. Truly, I had not thought about that little piece of information at all. "Alice will know if I decide to escape -," I realized suddenly and continued, "- but, if you…"

"Oh yes! I've got an idea – we'll work on snap decisions here then. I just need to get you to La Push and – oh shi –"

"What is it? Jake?" I whispered urgently, but when there was no reply, I looked up to see Esme and Alice walking towards me out of Victoria's Secret.

Trying to look innocent, I grabbed the bags off of the bench and stood up when they got closer – hopefully appearing like I was ready to go anywhere they wanted to.

Instead of the happy smile I thought I would get from Alice, I received a dry glare – Esme's eyebrows were furrowed in concern.

"What?" I asked Alice, trying to sound alarmed.

"Your future just disappeared," she replied brusquely.

"What do you mean it disappeared?"

She didn't answer – instead she looked around smoothly and murmured softly, "Smells like dog. One of them is here. Let's go grab something at the food court and leave."

"Oh – Alice…" I thought quickly. I needed to stall for more time in case Jacob was planning something. "You sure you don't want to shop anymore? I know you really wanted to hit a few stores up ahead…" At least, last time I remembered, she wanted to hit a few stores up ahead…

Alice rolled her eyes. "It's not like you were really paying attention anyway – I'm fine with going home now. Besides, you have to be hungry. Have you eaten anything today?"

I would not deny that I was hungry.

Without warning, Alice took my hand and the bags, and, with Esme on my other side, the two of them led me to the food court. I mentally kicked myself the entire way.

-

Fast food smells wafted from the outlet ahead of us. My stomach made a noise that was a mix between a gargle and a moan as we approached – I hated myself for it. I glanced around at the food selections, but before I could come to a reasonable decision, Alice was pulling me by the arm.

"You're going to want Subway – might as well speed things up," she said in an almost detached voice. Horror-struck, I realized Alice's visions were going to make this food excursion go much faster than what I was planning for. Furthermore, I concluded that her tone hinted she was mad at me, probably because I talked to a "dog" behind her back.

All around us people were lining up in jumbled, disorganized lines in front of the food counters. Being a Saturday, there was already pandemonium in the mall as it was. Glimpsing around, I noticed that there were only three actual restaurants in the food court, coupled with a Starbucks and a Mrs. Field's. Alice and Esme stood in front of me in the chaotic mess of people, both staring at the menu. I wondered vaguely whether they did this because they were interested in the food choices, or if they were just distracting themselves from the crowd. In any case, I stood behind them, losing myself to thought while staring at a metal awning that jutted out over the Subway stand ahead of us. It was a dull steely color and was situated at such an angle so that the reflections of those in front of us appeared as a foggy blur of colors on the metal. I tried not to laugh when I thought about a time in my life when I believed vampires, if they actually existed, wouldn't have reflections. I watched it as we moved up in line – a baby in a stroller being pushed closer to the stand, a group of girls talking excitingly to the side about one thing or another, a tall, limp looking man shouting orders into a cell phone, a small girl swinging off her mom's hand, a flash of red-brown skin…

I held my breath in surprise. It was only an instant, but, I could have sworn…

A hand clasped over my mouth to silence the scream. Suddenly I was being lifted into the air and jostled about like a rag doll. Air was moving passed my cheeks and my eyes watered with all the movement. From what I could tell, I was moving through crowds and even slamming into some people. Some of them would turn back around and deliver crude remarks that I could barely comprehend or focus on. I could tell my captor was human – his hands were warm and he did not move in the almost smooth, gliding way that I've come to associate vampires with. But I could not deny he was fast – much faster than a normal human for that matter. At present, I tried squirming, twisting, and turning hopelessly in the arms of my kidnapper – but it was no use. The arms that held me were iron bars and despite my feeble attempts to break them, the bars did not so much as crack. Fighting back tears, I continued my struggle for freedom.

As I was pondering actually biting the fingers that held my mouth shut, and wondering distantly whether Alice or Esme caught sight of my disappearance, a rough, desperate voice made me stop everything I was doing.

"Bella! Jeez, quit moving! It's hard enough trying to dodge two vampires without you making it ten times worse!"

"Jaaub?" I spluttered into Jacob's hand, which was still clasped over my mouth.

Despite the muffled sound of my voice, he was able to understand me.

"Yes its Jacob! Who else would it be?" he rasped.

I could think of some other people who it could be… I thought, irritated that he caught me so off guard when I was expecting something to happen. I muttered a string of angry responses into his hand which he interpreted as something entirely different.

"Well, when you said that the little one couldn't see what was going on in my head, I sort of acted on a whim. I tried to act quickly, without leaving any time for you to think about it," he said proudly.

"Waaare uuu taaaing sss?" I said into his hand, then added, "Tae uuur 'and ufff eee!"

"Oh, sorry," Jacob muttered and hastily dropped his hand from my mouth while repositioning me in his arms. "And to answer your previous question – were going to La Push."

Jacob continued to stride forward into a gathering of girls who barely got out of his line of fire in time.

"Jeez Jacob! You could at least be a little less aggressive!" I shouted at him.

"This is the only way to distract them. Hopefully, they haven't noticed yet – damnit, they already do," Jacob swore.

He bounded forward with a new sort of vigor, sidestepping and leaping into as many people as he could, supposedly to get Alice and Esme off of our trail. Suddenly, he made a tight right turn into a bathroom hallway between two stores. With his speed and agility, going down the hallway and through the double door exit out of the mall made me fell like I was going through a tunnel – similar to the cliché tunnel people travel through before death.

The sky was a bizarre dark gray color – the clouds were threatening to pour forth their liquid viscera upon the earth. I shivered when a wind swept passed me after Jacob placed me on the blacktop behind the mall. I squinted up at the sky and cursed that it had to recede back into its ever-present stony self of Forks after the brief sunshine of the morning. Although the clouds were common in Forks, the sudden chill outside was not and I wrapped my hands around myself. I looked back over at Jacob who was pacing and throwing continual furtive glances my way.

"So what now?" I asked, throwing up my hands. "Knowing them, they'll be here in two seconds."

"I know, I know!" Jacob said, agitated. "Listen, Bella – there's only one way to get out of here in time…" he paused, appraising me. Then he said, smiling sweetly, "You like dogs – right?"

I gapped at him. "No way – there is no way I'm going to do that!"

"We'll go through the forest – it's not like anyone will see you!"

"No!"

Jacob squinted at me, and then said – "Fine – I'm going over there to think of another plan while, in the meantime, your bloodsuckers get closer and closer!"

And with that, Jacob strode angrily into the trees surrounding the back lot of the mall. I watched him in cold silence, crossing my arms and shouting – "Fine Jake! Think up another plan. I'm going to sit right here and wait for Alice and Esme to come back and get me. Whatever happened to you last night can wait I guess!"

But before I could even cross my legs and sit on the asphalt, out of the darkness, tall and muscular in his russet-colored wolf form, Jacob charged directly towards me. I didn't have time to move – I didn't even have time to scream. I was frozen as Jacob ran right up to me and, in one fluid motion, caught me with his mammoth head and tossed me over his back. I landed with a plop on my stomach, desperately trying to regain my balance on his giant body. He stopped while I strung my arms around his neck and grabbed onto his long fur – but before I could even say, "No – listen Jacob –" and try to disembark, Jacob pounded forward, twisting himself around a full 180 degrees and heading back into the forest. Out of the corner of my eye, I could have sworn I saw the backdoors of the mall open…

The experience of riding on Jacob's back was quite unlike anything I've done before. I gritted my teeth and held tighter onto his hair. The whole thing could be described as trying to stay onto one of those mechanical bulls at a rodeo show or country bar. Despite my difficulty in getting a good hold on Jacob, it would be a stretch to say that it wasn't exhilarating – because, in an odd way, it was extremely exciting. It was a rough sort of riding – the wind whipping against my hair (most of my head being buried into Jacob's shoulder blades) and my whole body seeming to move along with Jacob as he moved. I could tell Jacob was trying very hard to keep me on top of him – but I knew he was enjoying the speed and the freeing sensation of it all. Perhaps that was the reason why I wasn't panicking so much.

I don't know how long we were running for – perhaps just a few minutes – perhaps a few hours. Being with Jacob was like being in a dream. I felt as if I wasn't there – my body was, but my spirit was somewhere else entirely – the whole event was just so surreal. Time didn't seem to matter to me anymore – in fact, nothing seemed to matter anymore. Perhaps that is why, the next thing I knew, I was standing numbly outside of Jacob's house.

There was a tap on my shoulder and I jolted to the side. Jacob was standing there, looking at me with a concerned look on his face. His touch seemed to have woken me from my trance.

"Are you okay?" Jacob asked, worried.

"Yeah," I said, trying to shake myself into lucidness.

"You sure? Cause, man, you look paler than usual. Did I really scare you that much?" Jake asked, getting playful at the end and bumping me on the shoulder.

"Actually – in an odd way – I guess that was sort of peaceful," I answered sincerely. "It was a very out of body experience… I liked it." I nodded, smiling.

Jacob did not seem to find my words peculiar – in fact, he nodded himself. "It's like that for me every time…" Then, for a second, Jacob's eyes sort of glazed and he looked like he was in another place entirely. Eventually, he said seriously, "I better do this quick – the guys already know I brought you here and they're not going to be happy with me."

"Why's that?"

"Well, because I'm pretty sure I'm not supposed to be telling you this. But, I think you have a right to know – since I'm almost positive that it concerns you."

"And that's why you went on this huge quest to get me here?" I pried.

"Yep."

"Hum, must be good then," I concluded.

Jacob grinned and took my hand. "Let's walk," he said.

The shadows were getting longer as the sun began to set. The two of us were walking along the edge of the road in the general direction of the La Push boundary line. I could smell the grass. It was a sweet smell, one that hinted at the prospect of more rain. Great – that was just what I needed. Jacob continued to hold onto my hand, but I didn't mind. It was comforting – his hand was big and warm – a cushion that kept me from the chilliness of outside. In fact, the whole scenario was like something ripped from my memory of an earlier time – when it was just Jacob and I together. The two of us were silent – just walking. The whole thing was serene and I realized how much I really missed Jacob.

I wasn't sure if Jacob was enjoying the walk as much as I was – or perhaps he was enjoying it more than me. Eventually, I ended up being the one who broke the silence. "So – what is this thing you have to tell me?"

Jacob sighed. For the first time, I realized how tired he was. There were deep, dark circles under his eyes, his hair was more ruffled than usual, and, with a pang in my stomach, I noticed that he looked much older. His sigh added to the whole effect – it was heavy and pained.

"Jake – when was the last time you slept?" I asked.

He yawned. "You've noticed."

"Jake – you look like hell," I said – using the same words Alice so kindly used to describe me more than a month ago.

"Thanks – I'm kind of going for the dead look. I heard you're going for that look too," he said, cruelly sarcastic.

I dropped his hand and stared at him. "Is this why you brought me here?" I asked scathingly.

Immediately, Jacob was apologetic. "No, no – it's not. Sorry – that sort of slipped out. I don't want to fight today. I'm sorry." He reached for my hand again, but I crossed my arms.

"Then tell me what's going on," I said curtly.

He exhaled and said, "Okay – I've been up all last night and this entire morning running. At about twelve last night one of them crossed into the La Push territory."

"Define them," I said frowning, heart starting to race.

"Do I have to spell it out for you?" Jacob asked, irritated. "It was a bloodsucker – not a scent I recognized."

I nearly choked on my own spit – if that's possible. "What?"

"Yeah I know. This was the first we've seen of them in awhile. Of course, the pack of us followed the scent – for hours. We even caught a glimpse of the one we were pursuing."

If I bit my lip any harder, it was going to start bleeding.

"It was a female – shorter, like the annoying one you are so fond of," he said, scowling. "She also had really blond hair – almost white I guess. And, man, I gotta say, I thought I was fast, but I'm nothing compared to this one. She bolted out of there as soon as she realized we were following her.

"So anyway, that's why I wanted to talk to you… because I know you are somehow involved in this one way or another. And right now Bella, you are going to tell me how." Jacob stared at me fiercely, waiting for an answer that, for some reason, I couldn't seem to give. My mouth wouldn't move and I had no idea what to tell him. Jacob rolled his eyes. "It's not like I'm asking you your feelings about me or anything Bella – come on! This is serious – this is about your safety and I think that you owe me a little more than you're giving back."

I gulped and trained my eyes to the ground. "You're right Jacob – I owe you way more than I could ever repay back… But I honestly don't know how to tell you any of this."

"Bella – quit it with that. Whatever you have to tell me, tell me. I can take it, whatever it is." He crossed his arms and waited.

My eyes drifted until I was looking now at my feet. After I arranged my thoughts, I said slowly, "Do you remember, more than a month ago, when I told you about that Victoria character?"

"This is still about her? I thought she'd left – and I'm pretty positive that wasn't her scent the pack and I got."

"It isn't… let me explain."

We stood there, the two of us, as I told Jacob everything – well, almost everything. I told him of Alice's vision, Victoria's call, the people tracking us, how frightened I was… I poured it all out to Jacob in a huge deluge. It was like I was getting an enormous boulder off my shoulders, and the freedom of not having the weight anymore very nearly sent me into hysterics right in front of Jacob. It was nice to talk freely to Jake like this – he didn't even interrupt. He nodded, or sighed, or grunted when I mentioned the others. Sometimes he quivered angrily, but the self-control he learned since last I remembered him was amazing. Despite this, I couldn't bring myself to tell him all of the details of last night – only that the Cullen's chased the blonde vampire into the woods after the crash. It seemed so recent; I myself couldn't seem to process everything that had happened the night before (especially the marriage part). Plus, I didn't want to test Jacob's self-control. If he knew everything… I had a sickening feeling that he might explode. At least what I told him explained the band-aids on my forehead.

Near the end of my speech, Jacob wrapped his huge arm around my shoulder and pulled me to him. I placed my head on his warm chest and I realized that I had been crying. Hastily, I wiped the tears from my eyes and wondered how stupid I must have looked. Suddenly, Jacob was wiping my cheek as well and pulling the hair out of my face. I knew I should have stopped him, but I didn't care. It was comforting and I closed my eyes. Jacob's arms pulled me closer to him and I sighed. Being crushed to him seemed to stop my heart from pounding so chaotically – for some reason… There was a little movement and I thought that Jacob had let go of me. Then something moist kissed my cheek…

My eyes flashed open only to see Jacob staring back at me, bent down to my level. His eyes were intense and his features unusually soft. For the wildest moment, I felt like I wanted to wrap my arms around his neck and pull him closer to me, so as to get better access to his lips. Then my brain seemed to catch up with my body.

"What was that?" I asked, backing up from Jacob's reach.

Then Jacob was grinning, a glistening toothy smile, suddenly glorious. "Don't tell me you didn't like that."

"I didn't like it," I said, but my voice was flat and didn't carry with it the anger it should have.

"I saw your eyes Bella," Jacob said. "I know you want more – and I would be happy to give you what you want."

I scowled at him. "Don't presume you know what I was thinking!"

Jacob took a step closer to me, doing some strange gestures with his eyebrows.

"Don't come any closer," I growled, taking a step backwards. "I'm warning you."

"Or you'll what? Start throwing punches?" Jacob mused, enjoying himself, continuing to come closer.

"I'll – I'll scream," I threatened uselessly – knowing that if I punched Jacob I'd likely lose the use of my wrist.

Jacob rolled his eyes. "Come on Bella – can't you at least admit to yourself that you may hold some feelings for me?"

"I told you! I love you Jake – as a friend and nothing more! Quit getting ideas!"

"I'm not getting any ideas. But you seem to be."

Jacob took a more forceful stride forward making me have to take a longer step back. This time though, my feet did not make contact with the solid concrete. Instead, my heel hit the edge of the road where the ground started to roll downhill. I lost my balance and my arms went flailing.

"Ah!" I exclaimed, preparing for the fall.

I was about to drop backwards, into the mud and grass and leaves of the forest, when a hand caught me and pulled me up. Then I was drawn into something hard.

"Boy – you sure can't go two seconds without doing something stupid, can you?" Jacob said, hugging me closer to him.

"Let me go Jake," I grunted.

"Look, I just want to let you know something Bella," Jacob said. "Can you stop moving? Man, all you've been doing is squirming today."

I relaxed a bit, but I was still tenser than a board.

"Thank you," Jacob breathed in my ear. "Look, Bella, I just want to tell you that – that I love you – more than you can possibly imagine – more than just friends. I can't live without you."

I gulped.

"Because of this, I'm not going to stand in the side lines anymore. I can't stand being passive and depressed 24/7 – it's not only killing me, but it's killing the guys too," he said, laughing slightly. "But, I can't listen to Sam anymore. This has gone on long enough – Bella… I'm going to protect you, I promise."

My lips were quivering. What was I supposed to say?

"Hum," Jacob dropped his hands off of me. "It feels so much better finally saying that."

"J-Jake, I-"

"Don't say anything now Bella, please."

"But Jake! You have to listen! You've got it all wrong!"

"I don't think I do," he said smoothly. "If only you could wrap around the idea that it is possible to be in love with two people at once, I think you'd feel much better about all this."

"No Jacob! Would you get it in your thick skull that I love Edward?! That I love him only?!"

"What? You don't think Mister Huge Ego can take a little competition?" Jacob grinned.

"Stop it Jacob! Stop it!" I said, stomping my foot on the ground.

"In any case, I finished what I set out to do. Thanks to you, the pack won't be so much in the dark anymore and we can finally finish off those leeches following you the right way."

I blanched. "What?"

"We think we have a probable location of where they are hiding out. We can take them out, no problem."

"No – no, Jake, you can't!" Seeing Jacob facing those monsters – someone so much more vulnerable than the Cullen's – made me sick to my stomach.

"Quit it with that. I'm not as easy to break as you may think. The pack heals fast."

"I want to go home," I said between clenched teeth.

"Oh come on Bella…"

"Now."

Jacob sighed and said, "Let me at least walk you home."

"Whatever," I said and marched forward ahead of him.

We walked forward in total silence. I had no idea what Jacob was thinking – he seemed to be content and half entertained at the same time from what I could tell. I, on the other hand, was extremely confused.

What if Jacob was right? Is it possible to love two people at once? What I was feeling before – wanting to pull Jacob closer – was that just an "out-of-body" experience? Or, was it something more? Either way, even if I did love Jacob, I knew in my heart of hearts, it was nowhere near the affection that I held for Edward. Although I couldn't stop thinking about Jacob everyday, I was still living just fine without him – wasn't I? When Edward was gone, wasn't I a complete wreck? Wasn't I an empty shell? I was – wasn't I? Suddenly, I was beginning to doubt that when I remembered what light Jacob brought into my life when Edward disappeared.

I was so absorbed in my thoughts I wobbled on the road a bit. I noticed Jacob throwing me quick glances, making sure that I didn't lose my balance again.

Then, it appeared in the distance. It was small and blurry at first, but as the two of us walked closer, it became larger and more focused. It was a silver Volvo, sitting just on the other side of the boundary line. My heart sped up and I wondered how long he had been sitting there.

I was still walking forward when I realized that Jacob wasn't beside me. Turning around, I noticed Jacob had stopped several feet behind me.

"What's wrong?" I asked. Abruptly, I felt like this was the best time to taunt Jacob. "What – are you afraid of 'Mister Huge Ego' now?"

He shook his head. He was staring forward, his expression creepily Sam-like.

"I think it's time for me to head back," he said finally. He looked confused and seemed to be concentrating on something.

"Jacob – are you okay?" I asked, immediately concerned.

"Sure, sure – I'm fine." His expression changed into something playful. "I promise that I'll see you soon Bella. Screw the treaty."

Although I knew I shouldn't have, I laughed at the last part.

"Bye Bells."

There was a honk and I knew it was time to leave.

"Bye Jake," I said, waving sadly. I turned and walked forward. It felt so awkward walking between the two of them. I felt like a toy being shared between two brothers.

As I got closer to the car, I noticed that it wasn't Edward in the front seat. Instead, it was Alice, looking positively livid. I sighed. After what happened at the mall, I guess I could understand.

Only a few yards away from the car, I decided to turn around again. Jacob was gone. I wondered how he was. Was he distraught? Happy? He couldn't possibly be as confused as I was. I wasn't sure how much more drama my heart could take.

There was another honk.

"All right, all right already! I get it Alice!" I said, annoyed. Who knew how mad she was?

I stalked around into the passenger seat and yanked the door open. As soon as I sat down and closed the door, the car whipped around and began to head home. Once we were a little ways away from La Push and careening down the road, I finally worked up the courage to look Alice in the eye.

"Look, Alice, I'm sorry. But I wasn't hurt or anything. And, I think I was getting a little too much confinement. Jacob would never hurt me," I said, going on through my planned spiel, until I noticed something was off with Alice. I stopped then and stared at her.

She was still angry as she stared at the road ahead. She still had her spiky black hair. She was still small, pale, and delicate looking. She was still wearing what she was at the mall. For a second, I thought my strange feeling about Alice was ill-founded, until I looked at her eyes.

They still looked sunken, with the purple hues around them… But her eyes were red – a deep, eerie, ominous, blood red…

Suddenly it became hard to breath as the corners of her mouth lifted up into a triumphant smile.

"I didn't realize this was going to be so unbelievably easy, Bella sweet," the women behind the wheel said pleasantly.

This wasn't Alice.

I gaped at her, terrified beyond belief. In my head, I was going through all the escape strategies that my father taught me when I was little. But, unfortunately, there wasn't a single strategy about how to get away from a bloodthirsty vampire. I remained frozen to the spot, unable to blink.

"Of all days -" the women continued, her voice high-pitched and seductive, "- the dog's foolish capture of you was the perfect time to intervene! You even fell for the car – a perfect replication of the one totaled yesterday. I thought you might have been more observant than that. But, ah, I guess not."

Oh god – I did forget about the car. Was that why Jacob was confused? Her gaze appraised me rooted to the seat.

"I'm still trying to figure out why he's so interested in you. You're pretty lanky and unattractive, no offense sweet. And apparently, you don't have much in the brain department. Hum, I guess I'll find out sooner or later then." She shrugged and turned her attention back to the road.

I tried to move my mouth but no sound came out. Perhaps the reason I couldn't argue with her was because I agreed with her assessment of me.

The girl removed a black, spiky wig to reveal a set of white-blond strands that belonged to the female from yesterday. I gasped, panic taking control of my body, the adrenaline coursing through my veins. But I couldn't do anything.

"Ah – that was getting annoying," the girl said after taking the wig off. "Now – Victoria wants you alive, but I don't want you to start screaming or anything. It'll attract attention – I'm sure you understand. Plus, I'm sure the one with the black hair will figure out where you've gone and where you are going sooner or later so we have to do this quick." She paused and stared at me, contemplating. "I don't want to completely mutilate you trying to render you unconscious or anything, so this'll have to do."

She reached over swiftly into the glove compartment in front of me. She pulled something out so fast that I only caught a glimpse of what it was before she shut the glove compartment closed again. It was red and in the general shape of a gun with what looked like two metal prongs at one end of it.

"I've never used one of these before, but it looks effective."

All of a sudden, I felt two pieces of cold metal touch the soft skin of my arm. Before I could even pull my arm away, there was a buzzing sound in my head and the world blackened around my eyes. The last thing the thought was: Oh crap.

-----

AN: Holy crap finally!! This took me forever to work on. I won't even tell you guys how busy I've been (what with this huge project at the beginning of the year that kept turning into even more projects, traveling, and crap). School has been hectic this year so far – and even this holiday season! I just finished my finals last week – as soon as they were done with, however, I had to travel some more. Again, I apologize guys for the long wait. Hopefully, this makes up for it – the incredible length of this chapter! In all honesty, I'm not sure when the next chapter will be up, but it's going to be fun to write! Hopefully, that means it'll be up sooner. It's going to be shorter as well (sorry). I promise everything from now on is going to be more fast-paced.

Now, if you noticed, I was very analytical in this chapter. Sorry if this bothered you guys, but I wanted to see if I could better understand Stephenie's characters and make it clearer for your guys how I perceive them to be. Perhaps this chapter was as enlightening to you guys as it was to me writing it. Plus, if you noticed, I was very much influenced by Eclipse in this chapter (especially Jacob's new attitude!).

And now, I leave you guys with this. Enjoy – I'll try to keep you guys entertained until Breaking Dawn and the Twilight movie come out. ;D