A/N Liz tries to arrange a new life for herself but Tom has other ideas... Usual angst plus some difficult home truths for Liz. Enjoy!

Across the stratosphere

A final message, "Give my wife my love"
Then nothing more
Far beneath the ship, the world is mourning
They don't realize, he's alive
No one understands

but Major Tom sees

(Major Tom, by Peter Schilling)

Tom's eyes narrowed as he regarded his former wife through the crack in the door. Observing her travel bag he met her eyes momentarily before nodding. "Come in Liz". She entered without a word, throwing her bags down in the corner before sinking into a seat at the large wooden table in front of her. She squinted slightly; the lighting the warehouse was harsh, a naked, fluorescent bulb hung down above her head, illuminating a basic kitchen area. She noted a portable gas stove and, with a wry smile, a bottle of instant pancake mix on the sideboard.

She nodded towards it "I guess Jacob Phelps is really into pancakes – I figured you only made them because it's what you thought the perfect husband would do."

He sighed. "Why are you here Liz? What's happened?"

"Straight to business then" she said, eyeing him from her seat at the table. "Here are the cliff notes. I've left the FBI. I need to disappear for a bit – I've managed to get passports, but I don't really have anything I need to get set up properly. I guess what I'm saying is, I don't know how to reinvent myself, and that's kind of your specialty. So… I'm back to where I started. I need your help."

Tom looked at her incredulously, before breaking into laughter. "What the hell happened anyway? Tell me, how did you end up at my door with a go-bag tonight?"

"That's none of your business." she said matter-of-factly.

Tom smiled humorlessly, rubbing his finger across his top lip for a second, a gesture Liz recalled from their time together. "I think it is. Forgetting the fact that you kept me prisoner on some rusty old barge, if I'm going to stick my neck out for you I should at least know what I'm getting myself into."

Liz looked down at her hands, worrying her scar with her thumb. Tom continued, his voice wary. "What is it Liz? It must be pretty bad. Has it got something to do with Reddington?"He saw her stiffen slightly. "Jesus, Liz. What have you gotten yourself into? Trust me, neither of us can afford to take him on. I told you he's not who you think he is. He's playing you."

Liz shifted uncomfortably in her seat. "Will you help me or not?" Tom ran his hand over his shaved head, and got up from the table. Retrieving two glasses he poured a slug of neat vodka into one. Before he could fill the other, he heard Liz say "not for me thanks."

He frowned slightly. "What happened to my wife who was always desperate for a drink after a tough day?" She just shrugged, so he sat back down at the table, emptying his glass in one go. "How about I make an alternative suggestion? I get that boat, and you come away with me. We could do it together Liz, no lies. Just us." He was looking at her earnestly now, a tiny flicker of hope in his eyes. "To be honest, you're not the only one who needs to start over. There's a target on my back while I stay here."

"Then why are you still here? You could have disappeared any time."

Tom looked across the table at her, his expression softening. "This is why I stayed, Liz. For the day you knocked on my door. I still love you. Let's start over."

Liz rolled her eyes. "We don't even know each other, not really."

"Then get to know me." Tom's voice was pleading. "So Tom Keen was a bastard. What about Jacob? Maybe you can give him a shot? Come with me Liz. Reddington is dangerous and he will destroy you. I can't protect you from him here but we can get away from him, from all of it."

Liz 's heart was starting to pound. "Who says I need protecting from him?" she shot back. "You don't know anything." As she spoke she got up from the table, distancing herself from him.

Tom's jaw clenched. As she moved he saw her wobble on her feet, catching the sideboard to steady herself. She swallowed hard. He regarded her for a moment, before standing abruptly, scraping his chair back with a sickening screech on the floor. He advanced on her quickly and raised his hand, testing a theory. He was vindicated when her hand flew instinctively to her stomach as he approached. He stopped dead in his tracks. "So that's why you're not drinking" he said quietly.

"I don't know what you're talking about." She tried to keep her voice even but her secret was out and they both knew it. Tom's face was ashen.

"I don't understand" he said slowly. "You always wanted to adopt. Or did you just not want my child?" his tone was bitter. "Has this got something to do with why you're leaving?"

Liz sighed. "It wasn't exactly planned Tom. Just take my word for it, I need to get out."

Tom's expression softened. He approached her and took her hand gently - "I'm happy for you Liz, I really am. And my offer still stands. Think about it, you can't stay here in hiding if you've got a kid to worry about."

Liz laughed hollowly. "Are you serious? You want me to come away with you when you know I'm carrying another man's child?"

Tom shrugged. "We were going to adopt – it's basically the same isn't it? Even after everything we've been through I still want that life with you. I know you don't believe me but I've always wanted it." His voice had taken on a desperate tone. Liz shook her head in resignation, and watched his face harden.

"Whose is it anyway? You get knocked up by some FBI big shot? Or did some criminal charm his way into your pants?" he said spitefully.

She didn't answer but it was too late – the pieces were falling to place and she saw Tom's face grow dark. "It's Reddington's isn't it?" he said, his tone dangerously quiet. "That's why you need to escape. Oh my God Liz."

Liz's face crumpled with the effort of holding back sobs. She hadn't cried, not this whole time. She had no-one in the world to share this with, the weight of her secret pressing down on her like a stone. "I… I'm just worried for my child. I need to protect this baby."

Tom was pacing back and forth in front of her, his expression alternating between hurt and angry. "You've got more to worry about than that, Liz" he spat. "Reddington's dangerous. Does he know about the baby? Fuck Liz, he's always been using you, and when he's done he's going to kill you."

As much as Liz had tried to be strong, Tom's harsh words struck fear into her heart. What had she done? How had she gotten into this mess? She lashed out defiantly. "He would never hurt me or our child! And he doesn't know anyway. God Tom, you don't know what you're talking about."

A flash of anger crossed Tom's face then. "I know a lot more than you think" he snarled. "I'm amazed his people aren't at the door right now, he'd never let you out of his sight, baby or not. It's only a matter of time before he finds you."

Liz was becoming increasingly uneasy. "I know he had me followed but that was because of what happened to Agent Malik -"

Tom laughed, cutting her off. "You're so naive Liz. Reddington doesn't leave anything to chance. How do you think I ended up in your life? How do you think you ended up with a spy for hire?"

Liz turned white, and gripped the sideboard behind her. "You're lying" she whispered.

"It's true" Tom said triumphantly. "The passports you found came from Reddington. He hired me to come into your life."

"No…" Liz moaned, tears now slipping freely down her cheeks. "He wouldn't. He would have told me…. He wouldn't do that to me."

Tom's face grew thunderous. "You're in love with him! I can't believe I didn't see this coming. You know, I thought I had you, at least while we were married. But you were never really mine, were you? You were always his" Tom said bitterly.

"I don't understand" Liz whispered, holding back sobs. "I hadn't even met him then."

"I'm amazed he didn't have me castrated when I got together with you-" Tom cut himself off abruptly.

Liz's head shot up to look at him. "So he didn't hire you to marry me? He didn't put you in my bed?"

Tom crossed his arms defiantly. "No, I did that all by myself. He hired me to protect you from a distance Liz, but I fell in love with you. I couldn't help that. I love you."

"You love me?! You don't know the meaning of the word!" She yelled. "You're a total fake who lied to me for years!" Liz's head was spinning - it made a horrible kind of sense, of course Red was behind Tom. He'd shown so much interest in her marriage since day one, always trying to warn her off him. Tom had betrayed her and Red. Why hadn't he just told her the truth? she thought desolately. Even now her heart cried out with every fiber to be in his arms, to have him tell her it wasn't true, that he hadn't kept this from her. She had never felt more alone than she did in that moment.

She grabbed her bag and made for the door. "What was I thinking coming to you for help?" She shot at Tom. "I'm sorry I came!"

Tom seethed as the door banged shut behind her. Existing there like a miserable shadow in the warehouse, even after everything, he had clung to the desperate hope that they might be able to start again. That he could live happily ever after with his wife. But now his last hope had left, slamming the door in his face. Reddington. She had chosen Reddington. A man who was so much more corrupt than him, a man who had hung like a specter over his life ever since he married her. You're not sorry Liz, but you will be, he thought, his features dark and mouth set in a cruel line. He grabbed his phone and started dialing. "I have information I think you're interested in. Elizabeth Keen just left my place."

TBC