Title: Story Time With Donut: The Three Little Soldiers
Characters: Donut, Simmons, Grif, Church, Caboose, Tucker, O'Malley, Doc, Tex
Prompt: #83 And
Summary: It's story time with Donut....run!
Disclaimer- I don't own Red vs Blue
--Story Time--
"Once upon a time....in a land far far away."
"Donut! What the hell are you doing?" Donut turned out of the chair. the book still in his hand. "Um....hi Grif, Simmons! What are you doing here."
"Um..I think the better question is why are you reading..." Simmons looked at the front of the book. "...fairy tales?"
"Oh, too easy..." Grif muttered to himself, while Simmons rolled his eyes.
"No really, what are you doing?"
"I'm telling a story!"
"And why are you telling a story?"
"Because it's story time silly! What else would I be doing" Donut grinned and opened his book some more. "And now, this is the story of the three little soldiers..."
"What?"
–
Three little soldiers...the littlest solider had blue armor and was really dumb. The middle sized solider had turquoise armor...and was really annoying. The biggest of the three soldiers wore light blue armor and was really mean.
One day they were kicked out of the base by their commanding officer.
"And don't come back ya lazy good for nothings!" The Sargent yelled out as the three little soldiers were thrown on out of the base.
"Well this sucks." The light blue solider said as he got off the ground.
"Well now what?" The turquoise soldier complained. "Were are we going to go?"
"We? Yeah, right. We're going off on our own, as in...separate!"
"You're leaving me?" The dark blue soldier was very sad.
The light blue soldier rolled his eyes. "Right. Well I'm going to go find Tex."
"Of course you are." The Turquoise soldier replied as he got up.
-
And so the three little soldiers went their separate ways and went to find places to live. The littlest soldier wasn't very smart, he found a haystack and discovered it was comfortable. He named it his house, well he named it Donna but that's getting off topic.
Now what the little soldier didn't know was that a crazy, split personalitied madman was on the loose!
–
"Wait, wait wait." Simmons interrupted Donut's tale. "A crazy madman...isn't that redundant?"
Donut frowned. "Simmons, stop ruining my story. I'm just getting to the good part!"
"I don't think that's possible at this point." Grif muttered.
"Anyway..."
–
"I don't think this is a very nice idea."
"Oh, do be quiet. Of course it isn't a nice idea. We're going to kill people!"
"I'm just saying...."
The crazy split personalitied mad man was in the middle of an argu-
"Hey! It's not nice to call people names you know!"
"Besides personalitied isn't a real world, you imbecile."
I SAID, The crazy man was in the middle of an argument! Stop ruining the story guys!
"Oh, whatever.."
And so, while the crazy man was in the middle of an argument with himself, he noticed a strange looking house.
"That's the most pathetic looking house I have ever seen."
And so the mad man yelled out.
"Um...excuse me. I don't mean to be rude, but we'd really like it if you could come out of your house...to talk to us..."
"And so we can kill you!"
The littlest soldier poked his head out of the pile. "Um....no thanks...I think I'll pass on that....thank you."
"Oh well, we tried."
"Yes, and now we'll try harder." The crazy man pulled out a rocket launcher and shot near the pile of hay. This sent both the hay and soldier flying into the air.
"Hey, that's mean!"
However the littlest soldier didn't seemed to be hurt as he got to his feet and stared at the remains of his house.
"Donna! Noooooooo"
"What the bloody hell is he talking about?"
The soldier glanced over, realizing he was not along. "Uh...hello...." Noting the rocket launcher that was now pointed at him he quickly started running away. "Running time!"
-
The second little soldier also couldn't be bothered to build a house. However he did manage to locate a rather rundown house made out of sticks. He was sure that was good enough!
"Well if he's that stupid he deserves to be killed." The madman muttered to himself as he reached the house made of sticks that the littlest soldier had run to.
"Hello, is anyone home?"
"Uh...no!" The first soldier yelled out and was then told to shut up by the other soldier.
And so the madman took out his rocket launcher again and shot near the house...again. And the house fell down!
---
"Ugh....I hate this story." Grif moaned. "Why can't we leave."
"Come on Grif!" Donut grinned. "I'm just getting to the good part."
"Didn't you say that last time?" Simmons asked.
"Yeah, but this is the really good part."
"Do they all die?" Grif put in. "Because if not then..."
"Anyway!-the
--
two soldiers ran away from the crazy madman towards the house of the light blue soldier. It was made out of brick.
"Wait..." The turquoise soldier questioned as they ran. "How do we even know where he is? He never said."
You just do alright!
"Fine, but I'm just saying it's kinda a big plot hole."
And once they reached the house the soldier let them in.
"Church!--I mean light blue soldier!" The littlest soldier yelled out. "Did you miss me?|"
"Ugh, I hate this story." The light blue solider muttered as he reluctantly let them into the house. "Why couldn't I just let you guys die."
"Nice to see you too." The turquoise soldier replied sarcastically. "Hey is-"
He was cut off as the voice of the mad man rang out!
"Let us in guys."
"How about no." The light blue soldier yelled out. "Go bother some other people. Maybe that stupid narrator or something."
Hey!
"We'll get to him next. But first we will destroy all three of you pathetic soldiers!"
"Not so fast O'Malley." A voice came out from behind the mad man. "Put the rocket launcher down."
"Hey it's Tex!" The littlest soldier felt the need to yell out.
"No shit."
"Alright. Drop the gun and start walking."
In a few minuted the mad man was disarmed and running away.
The End
–
"So guys!" Donut closed the book. "What did you think of story time?"
"That was the worst thing I have ever heard in my life." Grif moaned from the floor.
"Why were you arguing with yourself?" Simmons asked with a raised eyebrow. "That was really weird..."
"Never do that again."
Donut pouted as he put the book to the side."Fine, no more story time."
"Oh thank god!"
"Now it's interpretative dance time!"
"…I hate life."