Hey you guys! I'm honestly over the moon that you are all enjoying this so much, I'm really enjoying writing it. I'm keeping the drama for now purely because that's what keeps us all glued to the show! If it was all happy families all the time no one would watch. I'm in the process of writing the next update so it should be up shortly. Disclaimer: all credit of the characters goes to Callie Khouri, nothing is my own apart from the story line thus far. ENJOY AND REVIEW!

Deacon didn't want to stop, but he could feel her tears on his cheek. She's crying. Deacon wasn't quite sure what was going on, or how she was feeling at this moment. But Rayna was in no way stopping what was happening as she began to unbutton his shirt. Deacon wanted this. Lord knows he wanted this, he had for such a long time craved Rayna. The touch of her skin. Her kiss. Somehow Deacon couldn't shake the feeling in the pit of his stomach that told him to stop. She's not in the right frame of mind. Don't do something she will regret. Deacon needed to make sure Rayna really wanted this because she loved Deacon. Not because she was hurt or angry. Deacon knew that if Rayna was doing this to take her mind of her actual feelings, she would regret it in the morning. She would hate herself and equally so she would hate Deacon for letting her do it. No, I cant do this without knowing how she really feels.

Rayna didn't want to stop, because stopping meant thinking and thinking meant feelings and feelings meant talking. None of which she wanted to do, however she could feel Deacon's hesitation. He was over thinking it. Again. Every single time him and Rayna ended up like this as a result of a fight, Deacon would over think it. He would run over the possible repercussions and then try to determine the likely hood of them occurring. Rayna didn't want to stop, she wanted to act she didn't want to talk. Rayna needed something to happen to her that felt normal. That felt like home. Deacon, the cabin, her girls. That was what felt like home. The more he pulled away, the more she pressed forward. Rayna was not going to let him stop her, and with that she began unbuttoning his shirt. She didn't even know she was crying until Deacon placed his hands on her wrists, thus stopping her from continuing.

'Ray..'

' Deacon please' He hated when she did that to him. It was hard for him to resist.. Deacon might have caved if she had looked at him but Rayna couldn't even bring herself to look at him.

' Rayna look at me, tell me you want this?'

' I want this!'

' Tell me you want us, like this?'

' Deacon..'

' Tell me your not using me because your hurt? That you wouldn't do that to me? You wouldn't do that to us?'

' You know what Deacon just forget about it, give me my phone.' Rayna's common sense was kicking in as she glanced up and took in her surroundings. I shouldn't be here. This was a bad idea. Pull away now.

' Why?'

' So I can call a cab, I'm going home.' Rayna needed to get out of there, this was the same cycle Tandy had warned her about.

' Rayna speak to me.' Deacon knew something was going on in her head. She's confused. Rayna always fought a battle inside herself about what her head said against what her heart wanted. Deacon recognised the look on her face, she was preparing to flee to avoid the impending conversation. Only this time Deacon had no intent on letting her go. Not this time, we are facing this even if it destroys us.

' I cant! How can I speak to you?'

'How can I tell you that the reason I'm hurting is because of you? How can I tell you I wanted you so badly I fell asleep crying every night since you left me there?' There it was. The months of hurt and despair at his departure laid out on the table for him to see.

' Rayna I told you why I did it! You don't think I was hurting?! You don't think I wanted to be with you! Do you have any idea how devastating it was to watch you and Luke tonight, I mean Luke Wheeler! Jesus, Rayna I don't even understand why we are arguing. I love you , you love me. Its that's simple.' Deacon knew it wasn't simple. Anything but simple, he and Rayna had always be 'complicated' to say the least. But he had to say something to coax a reaction from her. The only way Rayna ever broke her wall of silence was when her buttons got pushed. Deacon knew all the right buttons.

' It's not that simple! Love isn't enough! Sorry isn't enough!'

' Then what do you want?!I get clean, you get married. I say I love you , you walk away-' All Deacon was now recalling was the countless times he had watched Rayna turn her back on him out of fear that he would break her.

' Don't you dare act like this is my fault! You were a drunk! I cant wait for you-

' That what people who are in love do Rayna, they wait for each other.' Deacon was at his wits end, he wanted all cards laid out on the table. If she really wanted to be with him then she would listen and do what he was about to say and if she didn't she would leave and he would let her go this last time. But deep in his heart he believed he knew Rayna, he knew her heart.

'Now I'm going to say this and I'm only going to say it once so listen close. I am in love with you Rayna James. I have always been in love with you and I always will be till the day I die. And I will wait for you. I know we have hurt each other but there ain't nothing we haven't got through babe. I know this is going to take time and so I'm going to wait. Wait until your ready. And when you are, you come and find me.'

'Deacon-

' No, I'm done playing this cat and mouse game Rayna. I want you and you want me. You cant lie about that to me or to you , hell you cant even convince him of it. I know your going to fight this. But eventually your going to see, the way that I have, that Rayna we are meant to be. Me, you and the girls. That's the life we are suppose to have. So you can go and I wont stop you, but you remember where I am and when your ready come back to me.'

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