Jonquil- desire

Most days the ground was still wet with spring but Erza preferred the garden over any other place. Even when the clouds hovered just to the west of the sun she could be found watching the jonquils bloom. They always showed their faces first in the beds kept carefully cultivated all winter. She was supposed to be studying for end of term exams but her eyes would often stray from the pages of her books.

"Aren't you cold?" Jellal asked poking her bare knee with his finger as he joined her on the bench.

"Not at all. The sun will be out a little while longer and I want to absorb as much as possible." Erza readjusted her skirt before quickly turning to kiss him on the cheek. "I wondered if you'd be by. Your dad keeps you busy these days."

"He wants to retire knowing I am completely capable, I think. The new lambs will be born soon, too. You remember how that is."

"I do. It's been a while since I've seen something like that." She closed the book on her lap and grimaced. "I'm going to miss you this coming summer but father is insisting."

"It's okay, Erza. I've always known you'd go to a university far away sometime. I'll always be here when you come home. And if you decide to stay –"

"Stop." Erza set the book aside and placed a hand on his cheek to guide his eyes back to her. "I'm not like him. I don't leave what I love behind."

"You don't think a scholar would suit you better than a sheep farmer?"

"Jellal, I swear if you don't stop taking swipes at yourself I'm going to slap you."

"I just want you to be happy," he whispered.

Erza sighed and stood. She tugged Jellal to his feet and wrapped her arms around his middle.

"Why is it so hard to believe it's you that makes me happy? There's things I need to do before I can have what I want."

His fingers picked apart the braid she'd clumsily woven before settling down in the garden. The methodical way he straightened out all the tangles and fly-aways seemed to be a metaphor of everything he meant to her.

"And the same can be said for you," she continued softly. "Despite what you say, I know you love the farm and the animals. You love the air here and the open sky. Everything that makes you happy will always be here."

"Except you this summer."

"This coming summer and probably two years after that," she reminded him. Erza felt his chest inflate with a reply but she cut him off before he could begin. "But it doesn't matter. Nothing is going to change how I feel about you. I'm more worried about coming home to find you've married one of the Agria sisters and started populating the countryside."

Jellal laughed and Erza frowned up at him.

"What? Why are you laughing? Don't think I haven't noticed their mother sidling up to yours at every social function since your birthday this last year. Apparently eighteen is marrying age. By the time I finish school I'll practically be an old maid." Erza's nose wrinkled in disgust. "I half expect one of them to sneak into your house at night clad in nothing but lily-white lace to –"

"Please stop. My mother isn't trying to marry me off, Erza. I thinks she knows better than that." Jellal kissed her nose and grinned. "The only girl for me is you. I'd wait forever."

"You know..." Erza slipped two fingers between the row of buttons on the front of his shirt. "My parents are still in the city until this evening, and Simon has gone home for the week."

Jellal's eyebrows flew up. "Okay..."

"Why don't we take this discussion inside and upstairs before it rains."

It took him until Erza was half way across the garden to understand that she didn't want to have a discussion at all.

Over the years Jellal had expressed his love for her in various ways. Flowers, the squeeze of a hand, a playful nudge of his shoulder, spoken words – and sometimes words left unsaid – but when he whispered it into her naked shoulder, the hair at the base of her neck, and the palms of her hands he felt like it somehow meant more.