"Whoa," said Dirk Speedblood. "Is that the tree of wisdom?"

"That tree is garbage," replied Snow. "It doesn't work at all. Charming and I tried it a while ago. Supposedly it didn't work because my baby had potential to turn evil."

Hook grimaced and used his hook to itch his back. "Aye, but evil skips a generation. It was really Henry the tree was speaking foul of."

Robin Hood still looked a bit worried. "None of that matters. The tree can make up its own mind. Right, Marion?"

And with Robin's words, the tree turned around and revealed its old, wrinkly face. "Oooh, well hello all of you. It's good to see you after these billion years!"

"Marion?" Regina asked, her eyes bulging.

"Yes, Regina. Thanks again for sending me back in time. It gave me a lot of time to listen to my heart. To pick up folksy wisdom and share it with the local tribes."

"A talking tree, you don't see that every day!" said Dirk Speedblood. "It's a bummer you can't ride in a car while you're a tree, though. Driving is living for me!"

"That's ok," said Tree-Marion. "As long as some hooligan doesn't come along and carve his initials into me with his hook!" She glared at Hook who hid the hook behind his back.

"Ok, so Marion's a tree. I think this further solidifies that she's out of the picture and that Robin belongs to me," said Regina. "Let's get back to town and get these races on the road."

"Wait!" said Tree-Marion. "I have valuable information."

Snow White shook her head. "I don't trust trees. I fell out of one once."

Hook threw his hook like a boomerang and caught it with his other hand. "It's your call, lad. Do you want to listen to the words of a tree?"

Dirk Speedblood nodded. "Trees are important. They give the planet its air. To think, Marion may have been the very first tree, and the air she provided made life on Earth possible!"

Tree-Marion nodded, and a bunch of leaves fell from the movement. "Very well, Dirk Speedblood. I can tell you how to fix the gingerbread curse which is slowly turning you into a cookie."

"Score!" shouted Dirk Speedblood. Robin Hood high fived Hook, which proved to be a bad idea as he cut his hand.

"Yes," continued Tree-Marion. "You need the five gems of power from five mystical realms."

"That's it?" asked Regina. "I could have figured that out myself! Now make like a TREE and leave!"

"One more thing…" continued Tree-Marion. "You will also need the power of Aladdin…"

Tree-Marion was interrupted by the sound of a chainsaw. The sound of wood tearing echoed off all the other trees in the forest, and with a crack, Tree-Marion fell to the ground, face down.

"Tee hee hee, her BARK was worse than her bite!" said Rumpelstiltskin. "Henry, make sure you keep the face intact when you cut her apart. I want to use it to scare people! Such a WOODEN expression!"

Henry took off his goggles and dropped his chainsaw. "Yes, Grandpa. Don't worry, I'm good at this kind of thing."

Robin Hood was angry. "You monsters! I was married to that tree!"

"Don't worry, dearie," said Rumpelstiltskin with an eccentric finger waggle. "She'll grow back in another billion years or so. I wonder, if the face we have keeps talking, and another grows back, which is the real Marion?"

"Rrhhrarhhg" Dirk Speedblood roared. "You'll pay for that. Marion was a good tree."

Rumpelstiltskin snapped off one of Dirk Speedblood's cookie fingers. "Well dearie, that's just the way the cookie crumbles." He crumbled the cookie piece between his fingers and watched the crumbs float away.

"See you on the road," said Dirk Speedblood, and he walked away. Robin Hood cut off a piece of the tree to keep as a memento. As Dirk Speedblood's Honda Civic roared to life, a muffled voice came from Tree-Marion. "Mmmmmph… A Honda Civic… The prophecy is fulfilled."