A/N: Hola people~

Possible warnings: The usual.

Disclaimer: I do not own South Park. :c

Reviews:

MonkeysUncle: I'm glad you like it. And I like Candy, actually. It's probably the only het couple in the show I do like.

xEmerald Isle: Ah. I could suggest two Kenric fics if you want. They made me fall in love with the couple, they might work for you.

Angelic Guardian: Aw, thank you. And...xD Kenny wouldn't be Kenny to me unless he was a pervert. And speaking of perverts....yeah, there's gonna be a sex scene. Possibly soon. Oh, and The Lovely Bones was a good movie. If you enjoyed the book, you should watch it.

B-pod: No promises, but I'll try to fit some Cryde in there. I'm pretty sure for a fact that Clyde will come back. Thank you for the review. And...Pimp Cartman? He'd totally be a BAMF.

OffiKennyMcCormick: Aw, glad to know I can write the type of fic that people think about.

Thank all of you.

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

Dougie was sitting on Butters' bed, in the blond's room. Even after all these years, they were still friends. Dougie was smarter than Butters, even if the redhead was younger than the blond, and Butters went to Dougie for advice occasionally. This was one time the Stotch boy wouldn't listen to his friend though.

Butters, after witnessing Kenny hold onto Cartman in the theater, something he had only seen himself and Wendy do, had decided what to do to move along getting Eric. He couldn't wait any longer. Kenny was braver and more forward than him. He might try something if Butters didn't act soon.

"Y-yeah, I'm sure. Now come help be zip this up."

Butters was sitting down in his chair by his desk with his back turned towards his friend. He was hunching over so Dougie could zip up the dress he was wearing.

"Well, if you say so. It won't be my fault if this goes wrong and blows up in your face."

Dougie walked over to his friend, still unsure about the whole idea, and zipped up Butters' dress. Butters was dressed in a light yellow dress that went down past his knees; Dougie wasn't shocked to see that his best friend had shaved his legs. The dress had bright butterflies on it as a pattern; it was the kind of dress that would have been in when they were kids, but it wasn't slutty enough for the girls to consider it cool now. The blond had a wig on that was like the one he wore when he was a kid and the boys made him dress up as Marjorine. Under the dress, he had a bra on, which was stuffed with paper to give off the impression that he had breasts.

"I still don't see the point of this. They're going to know it's you."

Butters' was getting slightly agitated with his friend. Why couldn't Dougie just listen to him? He listened to him all of the time. Besides, Professor Chaos was the boss, not General Disarray.

"N-now, listen to me. E-Eric might not realize it's me. I-I'm a lot prettier than when I was y-younger." Butters had applied light make up, including lip gloss to his face. "A-and even if he does, it do-doesn't matter, just a-as long as Wendy gets jealous and they f-fight."

Butters didn't like it when people fought, but if it helped break Wendy and Cartman up, he'd do it. Besides, Dougie thought, Butters was prettier than half the girls in the high school, whether he was dressed up as one or not. If Dougie liked boys, which he certainly did not, he would have asked his friend out. They had already practiced kissing on each other when Butters was in the middle school.

'Ah,' Dougie thought. 'If only I was gay. It's so hard getting a girlfriend in this town. I wonder if I could make a type of cologne or something that would make girls sexually aroused around me when I sprayed it on...'

He would think about that later. Right now, he needed to focus on Butters.

"Why don't you just go out with that Bradley guy that keeps calling?"

Bradley, Butters' friend at camp years ago, had found the blond's number and been calling him for weeks now. It was driving Butters and his parents crazy; the Stotch's would ground their son if this kept happening. Butters had told Bradley this, and the boy had stopped calling him nonstop, but he still heard from every few weeks.

"N-now dang it! I-I told you, I don't like Bradley! H-he's not my ty-type!" Meaning that he wasn't Eric Cartman.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Come on. We're gonna be late for school."

When Butters walked into the school, he caught the attention of both boy's and girls. Years ago when he had dressed as a girl, the other girls didn't recognize him. He doubted they would this time either. The only people he thought really would recognize him were Stan, Kyle, Kenny, and Eric. Speaking of Eric...

Spotting the brunet, Butters mustered all of his confidence and walked up to him. He would need to be brave for this.

"W-well, how-howdy there."

Eric was digging something out of his locker so he didn't bother to look at the blond, though the people still around him were still staring; Dougie had been right-Butters was prettier than half the girls in their school, if not more. Eric hadn't looked over at Butters though, so he hadn't seen what everyone else was seeing yet.

"Good morning Butters." Eric must have recognized his voice, which the blond hadn't even thought to try to change. "Do you happen to have the Algebra homework fini-..." Eric had turned to look at Butters before his sentence could be finished. "...Butters, what the hell are you doing?"

"A-ah, jee wiz, I don't, uh, know who this Butters is. I-I'm just a new girl."

The Cartman boy didn't look like be believed his friend. Butters had been sloppy. Not only had he forgot to change his voice, but he had also forgot that his locker was right by Eric's. How was he supposed to get his stuff?

"...Right." Eric's voice was skeptical, but at least he wasn't walking away from Butters. The bell chose that moment to ring though, startling them both. "Meet me out by my car at the end of the day. It's the one in the front parking lot closest to the exit. You can't miss it."

Eric walked away, leaving Butters feeling triumphant.

'It worked! Eric fell for it!'

Of course, Wendy hadn't seen them, so her and her boyfriend wouldn't be fighting right about now, but Eric had invited who he believed to be a girl back to his house. What would happen? Butters walked to his first block, wondering if Eric took home girls he didn't know-or at least he thought he didn't know-often. He sure hoped not.

A/N: And in the next chapter, we're going to find out why it's rated M.