A/N
I would like to thank MissAlex, (Rebel without a Cause) for basically co-authoring this chapter and being an amazing guest beta when Annabella Laurie had to work and I wanted to get this in before I went out of town. Sam, I heart you!! I was a muddled mess when I wrote this and Alex helped complete me. So thank you so much for being my Hagan to my Das!
I'm a beta to a new fic called To Serve and Protect by Akeim. One word, Deputyward!
S Meyer's owns.
Chapter 10-Doing a Girl a Favor
Alice
I think I'm going to throw up. I mean it. I really think I'm going to upchuck, blow chunks, hurl and spew the contents of my stomach, right here, in this living room, on my mother's fifty-year old Persian carpet that she gave me as a housewarming present. I have never, in my life, been this nervous before. But it was my own stupid fault because I readily agreed to do this when Charlie called me last week asking me for help. Stupid.
"Charlie, I could just kiss you!" I screeched into the phone.
"Really Alice, I just want to see my baby girl happy again. I know she's content with Jake but that light she used to have – that spark that used to be in her eyes – it's gone and I feel that I'm to blame for it. If I hadn't driven her mother away, maybe Bella wouldn't have gotten all those ideas in her head and.....well Edward might...he might of turned out differently." Charlie's voice trailed off and I felt bad for him. The guilt in his tone was pretty obvious.
"I'm not trying to get them back together," he continued. "I only want them to face their problems head on and with my illness, I don't think I'm going to be around long enough or have the strength to help them do that once they get back. They are my only children and I need to see them happy before I go. This might be a long shot but it's the only thing I can think of. Will you help me? Just play along with it and maybe nudge her when she needs a little nudging…"
There was no doubt in my mind that I wanted to help him.
"Sure! Don't worry, you can count on me, Charlie," I promised. I heard him laugh quietly, happy that his plan actually had a hope in working out okay.
Charlie's plan of getting those two knuckleheads together again got me pretty excited because it meant that finally, I would be a free woman. For the past four and a half years, I had been living a lie, so to speak. Granted, they were the best four and a half years of my life, but our relationship lacked the legitimacy that I wanted. After I hung up with Charlie, I called Jasper right away and told him that finally a silver lining was forming on our ill-fated love cloud.
We figured if Edward and Bella got through this trip unscathed then maybe they would be healed enough to understand and accept Jasper and I as a couple. Our love started at such an unhappy point in their lives and we'd felt guilty about that ever since. But really, why should we feel guilty? We didn't do anything wrong. We just fell in love.
The problem was that our best friends turned into mortal enemies just as we got together and Jasper and I knew that eventually fights would break out, lines would be crossed, words would be said, and ultimatums would be set and quite frankly, we didn't want all that stuff to put a strain on our relationship. I didn't want to lose Jasper just because our two closest friends couldn't stand to be in the same room together. So I figured if Jasper and I kept our relationship a secret it would have a better chance at surviving. But now, with Charlie's plan, there was a chance that Edward and Bella could resolve their issues, which meant that Jasper and I would no longer be forced to take sides. We could just all be friends and exist harmoniously.
Jasper heard the news of Bella and Jake's engagement as soon as I found out, but when I talked to him a week ago, I had to tell him to play dumb with Edward because he still didn't know. I was just about to tell him about their impending road trip, but he informed me that he already knew about it because Edward had confided in him that morning. He was about to call me, but I beat him to the punch.
We badly needed Edward and Bella to go on this trip together, that much was sure, so we devised a plan. A simple plan of action. No matter what, we had to get Bella in that moving van with Edward whether she liked it or not. I knew it would be tough and that meant playing dirty. And I was all about playing dirty.
Plan A: Hold a massive Pink Party to get Bella liquored up and loosened up. Also, buy her a Margaritaville Margarita machine as a sort of bribe. Okay, not 'sort of' – it was a bribe. She was going to get snowballed when Edward showed up on her doorstep and I had to do something to butter her up before then. That way if she turned on me, I would have something to remind her of how much of a great friend I was.
Plan B: Get Edward thinking that he needs to go on this trip. Jasper told him he needed to get it done in order to get the old Edward back. We both new how sad Edward was lately so we figured he would like that idea. A little push was all Edward needed at that point. Jaz saw those wheels turning in Edward's head so he didn't need to do much more than that.
Plan C: Try to get Jessica Stanley out of the picture. I nearly fainted when Jasper told me Edward was seeing her again. Not good. As of late, we were still working on the Jess problem.
Off shoot Plan D: Tell Bella about Jake. Seeing him acting very boyfriend-like with that girl last night really threw a monkey wrench into everything. Jasper wanted to stop the whole plan then, thinking that we were now getting too involved in Bella's life and that this was no longer our problem, but I convinced him that maybe if Bella knew the brutal truth she might face her own truth – and of course, getting into the moving van with Edward, which was our ultimate goal.
Truthfully, the main reason for all of this chaos was to be able to 'out' Jasper and I to the public. I didn't want to hide my love for him anymore. It may sound selfish, but believe me when I say that I was also doing this for Bella's benefit. This trip would be the perfect opportunity for her and Edward to get all of their issues out into the open. And quite frankly, anything that got her away from Jake, was a blessing in my books. Edward was much better for her than Jake anyway, so if something more than friendship developed out of this road trip, that would also benefit Bella. See, I told you I'm not selfish.
However, right now, just as I was on the cusp of telling Bella everything, I couldn't help but think of going back outside, pushing Edward into the van and taking off without her.
Let's face it - Bella Swan was one scary bitch when she thought she had to defend herself. But I must give her credit - she really did take seeing Edward better than I thought she would. She was much calmer than I figured she'd be. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that her reaction scared me even more than if she'd completely blew her top. This led me to believe that the inner she-devil I knew existed in her, was hiding beneath the surface, getting ready to pop out when we least expected it.
I wanted to crawl under a very heavy rock the moment Edward whispered, "Good luck" to me just before I followed Bella back into the apartment. This was not how I figured the morning would turn out. I didn't think it was going to be all roses and sunshine, but I didn't expect this. However no matter what happened now, I knew this all had to be done.
Normally, I was not the type of girl that kept things shut in like I had been. I wanted to shout from the roof tops that I, Alice Brandon, was in love with the most gracious, selfless, loving human being on the planet. He was the man of my dreams and the one I was going to marry. Well, I would definitely say 'yes' if he asked me. If I got everything off my chest now and out on the table, there would be no stopping us. No more secrets. Well, okay, one more: Jaz looked way hot in boxers. But that was just my own peep show which no one else was allowed to witness. That secret was still all mine.
Right now, I was prepared for anything. Sure, Bella hadn't thrown a punch at me or tried to strangle me, but as I looked at her now as she darted back and forth looking for her phone that she wasn't going to find, I felt bile rise up into my esophagus. I swear if I looked at myself in a mirror, I would just cringe at my appearance. It was simply unacceptable for me to look anything but exquisite, but I knew that I didn't quite look that way now.
Unfortunately, my usual daintiness hadn't seemed to have rubbed off on Bella, considering the fact that the look she had on her face at this moment scared the poop out of me as she continued to look around the room. Her scowl reflected that of determination and an underlying unhappiness, but it was when she mumbled under her breath that she sounded downright demoniac.
I couldn't make out what exactly what she was saying - or chanting, for use of a better word - but it sounded murderous. I didn't think I really wanted to know what she was saying considering it was probably meant for me or Charlie, but since I was the only one in the room I knew I had to be the one to take the brunt of Bella's abuse. I was ready and I deserved it. I felt guilty as I watched her, knowing that her search was in vain.
I knew I shouldn't have done it, but the deed was done and the results permanent. I had no choice but to do it. There was no other way in my mind to get Bella not to talk to Charlie this morning so I did the first thing that came to mind.
I sent her cell phone to swim with the fishes.
Well, actually, I accidentally let it fall into the kitchen sink when it was full of dirty water. When I say accidentally, I totally mean on purpose, but for her sake and for my own safety, it will remain an accident until the day I die. My goal was to die at a very old age looking absolutely exquisite, not today, looking terrible, and by the hand of Bella Swan. If she talked to Charlie this morning before I got to her - or even Jake for that matter, then everything that Charlie, Jasper and myself had planned would've been shot to hell.
Then Bella would, just out of spite, not go with Edward, and nothing would be resolved. Also, she wouldn't be supportive of me when she found out that I was really moving to Forks to be with Jasper, instead of moving to Portland by myself.
It was a spur of the moment decision for Jasper and I, and when Charlie called last week with his plan, it seemed the cards were finally starting to line up for us. It was perfect timing.
Currently, Jasper was in Forks looking for a place we could rent and I was here, trying to get my hands on a job to sustain me until my party planning business took off. Nether one of us knew how to tell Edward or Bella. Right now this tidbit of information would have to remain a secret. I know I said no more secrets, but for now, there had to be just one more. I figured that admitting our relationship to Bella today, plus tell her about Jake, would be enough to get her into that moving van, so the truth that me and Jasper were moving to Forks, could be revealed after the road trip.
If this trip never happened for Edward and Bella, they would feel even more betrayed when they found out, but if they were happy when they come out of it, then maybe they would be happy for us and it would cushion the blow.
'Baby steps' is what I told myself; I was taking baby steps. Once again, I reminded myself that if Bella got a hold of her cell phone right now, it would make it harder for me to convince her to go with Edward. I had to make sure there was no way she could contact Charlie or Jake before I talked to her.
A breeze blew through my hair as Bella raced past me out of the room. Quickly, I snapped out of my haze of mental mind scramble and followed her as she moved around the room. Her movements were robotic and I found that my own body felt just as stiff and awkward as I followed her. She was like a zombie, just drifting from here to there. She was immersed in her own thoughts and I had to know what she was thinking before I went nuts.
"Bella…." My voice was barely a whisper, but I managed to croak out her name loud enough for her to hear me. Or so I thought.
She paid no attention to me as she frantically searched the kitchen counter, sifting through junk mail and looking in every nook and cranny. As I watched her, I contemplated how I would start this conversation.
For one, I had to convince Bella to take this trip with Edward. Two; I had to confess to her that Jasper and I were together and in love, and three; I had to tell her about Jake. I held all the information in my hands that would seemingly change the course of her life and I really felt like throwing up just thinking about it. Maybe she knew this was coming. Maybe her stiffness was her defense against what she knew was about to happen. I watched as she still searched through everything around her and threw things around like a hot potato.
"Bella, can we please talk?" I asked. But my voice was shakier than I had intended probably because I knew that deep down, I really didn't want to be having this conversation with her. She shot a look in my direction which basically told me, 'Don't mess with me or I will pull your hair out', but I ignored it. I had to do this.
"Please stop looking for your phone and talk to me. This is really important," I pleaded.
Bella slammed down the newspaper she held in her hands and walked briskly into her bedroom. I followed, knowing that it was a good place to trap her. Unless of course she was really mad and wanted to crawl out the window to get away from me.
"Bella, please" I begged while I watched her search the empty room. "Bella," I repeated. But I still received no response from her. Okay, now I was getting frustrated. "Bel-"
"Bella, Bella, Bella! You sound like a broken record!" she interjected with a sneer as she crawled on her hands and knees on the floor of her closet.
"Can we talk, please?" I asked again as I walked up to the closet door. Bella hopped to her feet but made no eye contact with me as she started making her way out of the room. So much for my plan of trapping her. She was flat out ignoring me and being her usual stubborn self.
"FUCK!" I screamed. "Will you just stop for one freakin' minute and listen to me!" My tone was so forceful that I even scared myself. Yay me! Then suddenly, I realized that I'd just said. 'Fuck'. I never say 'fuck'.
Sure, I said 'shit' and 'bitch' all the time, but to say the f-word was a big deal for me. It was one of my most hated words, along with 'cunt', 'hoebag', 'Twitter', 'circus carnies' (okay, that's two words), and 'Walmart'. However, desperate times called for desperate measures and at least it got her attention.
Bella turned on her heel and glared at me. I instantly felt liking hiding, but looking around the empty room, there was nothing around that could possibly shelter me. Her eyes never left mine as she studied my face. She tilted her to the side and squinted, "You just said 'fuck'!"
"Ya, I did, and I will say it again if I have to." I straightened my posture in an attempt to look more intimidating. I tapped my foot and waited. Bella lifted her head and huffed.
"Edward came all this way. What does that mean? Why would he do that?" she asked. Actually, it was more like she demanded to know.
I sucked in a deep breath and tried to explain. "He's here because Charlie asked him. You know Edward would do anything for Charlie…"
"I can guess why Charlie would send Edward, but I still don't understand why Edward would...." She bit her lip and her chin quivered. And just like that, my hard shell broke and fell to the ground.
I walked towards her and held out my hand as some sort of peace offering. She looked at my hand for a minute before sighing and taking it. I folded my hand into hers and we both slid our backs down the wall to sit down on the floor. I stretched my legs out in front of me and inspected my shoes, while Bella brought her knees into her chest. Our hands remained clasped and I realized that her skin was hot to the touch. She was stressed and I couldn't really blame her. We sat for a long time before I finally broke our silence.
"Jas-" But before I could say any more, she interrupted me.
"I don't think I want to hear it, Alice. I've been hit with too much already today." She rested her head against the wall and closed her eyes.
I held my mouth shut for about five seconds before my back bone grew again.
"Tough," I said bluntly, my voice void of all emotion. My back bone was back and strong as steel.
Bella kept her eyes closed as a smirk formed upon her lips. As her eyes fluttered open, I realized she'd given up the fight of ignorance. She moved her free hand to my shoulder which was a good sign.
"Tell me about Jasper, Alice. I want to know everything," she sighed into my arm as I let my head rest against hers. The anger of the morning was forgotten for the moment and we were sisters again. Relief washed over me as I realized that I'd managed to keep my appendages and I still had both my eyes. I wanted to keep it that way so I decided to start off simple.
"Well, Jasper is talented." I said with much conviction.
Bella chuckled and I felt my shoulder shake under her laughter, which made me smile in return.
"Please elaborate, Alice. That statement can be interpreted many ways," she joked as he turned to look at me.
"Well…he is an incredible man. But you know that already. Jasper makes me want to be a better person. He is funny, smart, compassionate, and he knows who he is and what he wants to do with his life. There is never a dull moment when I'm with him, it's like we can communicate without even speaking."
Bella smiled bigger and brought her other hand to rest on our linked hands.
"Plus, he's good in bed." I admitted, giving Bella my best sex face. "He can do wonders with whip cream and his hands...I mean, his mind is full of endless amounts of knowledge."
Bella gave me a light squeeze and we both giggled.
"Alice, you know Jasper is like a brother to me so I really don't need to know about your whip cream fetish."
"Hell, forget whip cream! Have you taken a look at what's outside our door? Edward is better than Cool Whip and Redi-Whip mixed together. He's Hagan Das! Damn! I would lick that! " I nudged her with my shoulder and she rolled her eyes at me.
"I don't know if I should think that's funny or if I should agree with you, Al." She let go of my hand and wrapped her arms around her knees but still rested her tired head on my shoulder. Bella was shielding herself. She was starting to close off again. Any mention of Edward sent her into cocoon mode.
We fell into another uncomfortable silence. We were both thinking too much. I could tell by the way Bella played with the hole in the leg of her jeans and because I was once again, studying my shoes. The quiet engulfed us as Bella continued to rest her head on my shoulder. During our time of silence, I'd determined that I needed to go shopping for a new pair of shoes - maybe ballet flats. Suddenly, I heard soft sniffles beside me, breaking our silence, followed by heavy breathing. I never expected Bella to cry.
"Why did you not tell me, Alice? Why did you not tell me about Jasper? I don't understand," she cried into my arm. I really didn't know where to start to make her feel better, but I knew this day couldn't possibly get worse. Therefore, telling her the truth was the best medicine.
"Bella, it was one of the hardest decisions we've had to make. I know you will never understand, but Jasper and I made the decision a long time ago, not to parade ourselves in front of you and Edward. Looking back on it now, I realize that it might not have been the best thing to do, but you have to understand that when we made our 'pact', it was during your worst time with Edward. Jasper said that Edward couldn't even say your name, so if he knew that one of his best friends was in love with your best friend, how do you think he would have reacted. Do you really think that Jasper and I would have survived? We both knew you two would make us chose sides and at that time, with our relationship so new, I didn't know if Jasper and I would be strong enough to pull through. And you were with Jake not too long afterward, so bringing up Jasper would have caused even more tension, especially considering that you just wanted to move on." It felt good to get that all off my chest after all these years and I let out a sigh of relief.
"It probably would have put a huge strain on your relationship," Bella agreed as she rubbed my arm, comforting me.
"I know it was selfish not telling you, and believe me when I say I really wanted to come clean. I mean, who wouldn't want to shout to their best friend that they are madly in love with the most brilliant fire fighter in Forks history?" Saying that last part out loud made me smile.
"Plus, it was kind of sexy sneaking around." I added. I didn't want Bella to think that I blamed her for having to keep my relationship a secret – it was just uncontrollable circumstances that prevented me from speaking up sooner. "You have no idea how many times you almost caught us. Remember that time when you went with Jake to New Orleans and came back and found a pair of boxers in the bathroom? Well, let's just say they didn't belong to a guy from Sigma Pi like I told you." I gave her knee a slap as I smiled proudly.
I continued to explain. "When you got back, Jasper was still in the apartment, hiding under my bed. I allowed him to come out only after you and Jake went to bed. He wasn't too happy about that," I admitted, laughing at the memory of Jasper waiting for hours under my bed. I had to sneak him food and a plastic bottle so he could pee!
"I can't believe you, Alice! That whole time he was under your bed?! That had to be like four hours or something!"
"It was six and believe me, he was counting!" We both laughed at this.
"I bet he was counting! Poor Jaz!" Bella giggled, before letting the euphoria of her smile fade. "So you love him? You're sure you do?" she asked, looking me directly in the eyes.
"Bella, I loved him before I met him! He's everything to me and I knew it the first time I saw him. It's unexplainable. I can't sum up four and a half years today, but trust me when I say that he's the one for me and I know he feels the same way."
I brushed the hair from my eyes while trying to swallow the lump that had formed in my throat. Up until now, I'd only ever admitted my feelings for Jasper to Jasper, never to anyone else. I couldn't tell my parents or any other friends because I feared it would ruin what we were trying to protect. The less people that knew, the less chance of Bella or Edward finding out. But now that the roadblock seemed to be lifting, it felt amazing not having to worry about getting caught.
"When you met, it was at the funeral for Edward's parents. I never saw it happening. I guess I was too wrapped up in what I was going through to notice. I'm sorry Alice, I was the selfish one. I should have paid more attention to others beside myself. That way I would've recognized it myself and you two wouldn't have had to go through this." She was such a great friend. Even after everything I'd admitted to her, she still didn't blame me. But that didn't mean I was happy that she put the blame on herself instead.
Bella moved to get up and I followed her with my eyes. I still wasn't sure if this was the calm before the storm or if I truly did make her feel a little better with my confessions.
She just stood staring blankly around the room, arms crossed, while she held her mouth tightly shut. I watched as the telltale frown appeared on her face as the sun seeped in through the window. I knew she wanted to talk more but she seemed to be fighting some sort of inner debate. Then I had an idea. I wasn't sure if it was going to work, but I was in desperate need to make Bella feel something other than guilt and sadness right now. No girl deserved to wear the look that Bella wore on her face right now. It caused premature wrinkles and I was going to tell her so.
I got up and went into the living room and knelt down in front of the stereo I got for my twelfth birthday. Every pre-teen girl deserved a boom box. It was a rite of passage. That stereo was one of my most prized possessions and I managed to keep it in pretty good shape. I still used it all the time because I had an extensive collection of CDs that I just couldn't part with, no matter how many songs you could put on an Ipod.
I scanned my collection and found exactly what I was looking for. Opening up the jewel case, I handled the disc with care. This was the collector's edition and I, in no way, wanted it scratched. I placed it in the tray and let it slide in the machine, hoping that this would help cure Bella Swan of the uglies.
I pressed play and turned the volume up to an ear splitting level. As the music boomed from the speakers, I was satisfied with my accomplishment. Perfect.
I smile to myself and fluffed my hair as I entered Bella's empty bedroom to find her with her mouth hanging open in shook as she shook her head vehemently.
"No Alice, I'm not going to do it!" she shouted over the music
"Yes, you are!" I yelled back.
"I'm leaving, Alice! There is no way in the world you're gonna make me do that stupid dance!"
"Good, go! I don't care. Say hi to Edward on your way out," I shouted while moving my hands around my face rhythmically.
This made Bella stop in her tracks. She'd forgotten all too quickly that Edward was still outside waiting.
"That is low, Al! But I'm still not doing it. It's not going to make me feel any better!"
"Madonna makes everyone feel better! Beyonce too, but Madonna is classic. Now shut up and Vogue!" I yelled at the top of my lungs as I reached for Bella's arms and moved them, vogue style. She felt like a limp noodle but when I started to sing the words to her, I could tell that she was starting to crumble.
"Greta Garbo, and Monroe, Dietrich and DiMaggio, Marlon Brando, Jimmy Dean, on the cover of a magazine…"
Bella tried hard not to crack a smile as I danced her around the room. It was hard for me to keep a straight face as I sang happily. This was exactly what we both needed - a release – a way to vent what we'd both built up for the last four and a half years. We were going to sing and dance it out like it was nobody's business. I grabbed Bella by the waist and moved her body around in circles. She let out a surprisingly loud laugh and I felt her body start to move with my hands.
"Grace Kelly, Harlow, Jean, picture of a beauty queen, Gene Kelly, Fred Astaire, Ginger Rogers, dance on air…"
I led us into the living room where the music was louder, and instead of voguing, we threw our bodies around and just got everything off our chest. Bella shook her head to the music and I wiggled my hips seductively, doing a terrible impression of a hula girl. We both jumped up and down and I ran around the couch as Bella did a nasty version of the Macarena.
"They had style, they had grace, Rita Hayworth gave good face, Lauren, Katherine, Lana too, Bette Davis, we love you…"
By now we are both screaming the lyrics at the tops of our lungs and voguing like Madonna's gay brigade. I felt a rush of excitement run through me because I knew that I was getting to Bella the best way I knew how. I was tired of the seriousness of everything. Dancing and singing like this was the perfect way to get a case of the funk. I knew I couldn't be forgiven for all my lies and deceit, but Bella letting me do this for her was her way of telling me she understood.
"Ladies with an attitude, Fellows that were in the mood -don't just stand there, let's get to it, strike a pose, there's nothing to it…"
"Vogue"
We both fell hard onto the couch, laughing our heads off as happy tears swam in our eyes. I got up and turned down the stereo. Our breathing was labored. Voguing was good exercise!
"I told you Madonna makes you feel better!" I sat back down next to Bella as we both tried to catch our breath.
"Yes, it does, Al, temporarily. But looking at the big picture, it still doesn't change anything. Edward is still outside, Charlie still is a meddling jerk, and I'm still an idiot for making you feel that you had to keep so much of yourself from me for so long."
She sat up straight and took both of my hands. Her eyes widened and I looked at her apologetically.
"Al, never, ever, feel that you have to keep anything as important as your love for Jasper from me, okay? Because no matter what happened between Edward and me, you're still my friend and I support you in everything you do and anyone you do." She reached for my shoulders and embraced me in the biggest hug possible.
I hugged her back with all my might because I was truly relived that I told Bella about Jasper. But there was an even bigger thing to discuss. The thought of telling her about Jake suddenly made me want to drink some magic kool-aid from a dirty, Swine Flu infested cup, handed over to me by a SARS infected patient.
But just as I was about to say something, my stereo changed discs and my other favorite singer of all time started singing. Bella released me and I giddily looked at the stereo. Perfect timing for the disc to change!
"Ugh! My ears! Turn it off, Al, it's killing me!" Bella held her hand over her ears as she scrunched up her face, giving me the pout. I rolled my eyes.
"For the last time, Britney Spears does not make your ears bleed! " I argued. "You should listen to this song, it might tell you something." It was the perfect song to listen to right now.
Stronger was my most favorite song by Ms. Spears, with the exception of You Drive Me Crazy, Oops I Did it Again, and I'm a Slave for You, all of which seemed to fit Bella right now. Edward drove her crazy, yet she might do him again, and, um, I'm a Slave for You was just plain hot.
"I'm not Britney and I'm nowhere near as strong like this song mentions."
"You are too, Bella! Just listen." We both sat back on the couch, listening carefully to the words.
Than I ever thought that I could be, baby
I used to go with the flow
Didn't really care 'bout me
You might think that I can't take it, but you're wrong
'Cause now I'm
Stronger than yesterday
Now it's nothing but my way
My loneliness ain't killing me no more
I am stronger
"You see, Bella, you're just like Britney. You're stronger than you think and you're only going to get even more so if you get your ass into that moving truck." I patted her arm as she shot me a worried look and bit her lower lip, immersed in her own thoughts.
"I'm not strong, Alice. Look at me, I'm a wreck. I just found out my father and best friend lied-" She stopped abruptly and looked at me apologetically. "Sorry."
I waved my hand. "I understand, continue."
"My father and best friend lied to me in order to get me to go back to Forks with my ex –boyfriend, who looks unbelievably hot in his cap and glasses…." She smacked her lips looking like she needed a stiff drink.
"I feel like I'm going to let myself down every mile I'm with Edward. Jake would never allow this even if I wanted to go with him. I'm not strong enough Al, there is no way. I wasn't even strong enough to hold onto Edward. I let him push me away. Then, I couldn't resist him when he surprised me on New Years. What good can possibly come of this trip? I need closure but this is not what I had in mind. This is like a tidal wave of closure and I'm going to drown."
"Bella, you were strong for Edward. He pushed you away. He pushed everyone away. Jasper told me how bad he was after his parent's funeral. He shut himself off to everyone and it took him a long time to come around to Emmett and Jasper. You were strong enough, don't ever doubt yourself. I've never seen such miscommunication like I've seen between you and Edward. You have to go on this trip and make Edward see the truth. This is your test to see if you really can get over him or not."
Bella moved her hands back to her lap, huffed, and then looked up at me. "This is not how I pictured closure. This was an ambush," she said through clenched teeth.
"Jeez Bella, do you think closure is throwing away every picture you ever owned of Edward?" I asked, calling her out on the discovery I made in her trash can.
She folded her arms across her chest and narrowed her eyes. "Hey, you sneak! Give me a break! I didn't want Jake to see them, okay? Speaking of Jake, I have to call him and tell him what's going on. It's only fair. He's going to be pissed that Edward is here, but I have to tell him."
"How did you think your 'closure' would go when you got back home? Did you think that you and Edward would just sit down in the same room together like two civilized people, and talk things out? Ha! Look at you two outside a while ago. You both couldn't contain your anger and that weird passion thing I saw."
Bella furrowed her brow and opened her mouth to speak but I interrupted, "If you go with Edward now, you can hash out everything on the road. That way there is no tension or anger left when you get home to your dad. You wouldn't want him having to deal with the two of you at your worst, would you? Especially in his current state! Plus, this road trip will allow you to prove to yourself that you're stronger than you think you are. Then after that, if you still want to be with Jake, it will be easier. Besides, Jake will never know that Edward showed up instead of Emmett if you don't tell him." I crossed my arms, satisfied with my statement. However, I was also guarding myself because now that the subject had turned to Jake, I wasn't sure if I had the boobs to tell her about Leah.
"Alice! I have to tell him."
"What Jake doesn't know won't hurt him," I argued as I got up and looked out the window at the moving truck. Edward sat on the back bumper with his head down to his chest. He looked like he was sleeping, but from this distance, I couldn't be sure. I tapped loudly on the window to get his attention and he immediately sat up straight and looked around until he found me waving at him through the glass. He shrugged his shoulders and mouthed to me, "What's going on?" I just smiled and turned back to Bella.
"It's obvious that he wants to get something out of this too and I don't think it's your hooch." At least that's what I was hoping. You never could tell with Edward because he was too passionate for his own good. The last thing Bella needed was Edward throwing her against the wall of another dirty bar. I made it clear to Jasper that he told Edward to keep his dick in his pants.
"Funny, Al!" she said with a roll of her eyes.
"Like I said, Jake will never know." I walked over to the stereo and messed with the controls, shielding my face from Bella because I could feel her glare burning holes into my back. She was getting suspicious as I avoided the discussion of Jake's infidelity.
"What is going on with you and Jake?" she asked. "Why are you so adamant that I keep all this from him? What do you have against him?" Bella stood up and walked to my side, studying my face intently. I thought if I tried hard enough to imagine something else in my head, like Jasper playing with my hair, or getting lost in his game of Warcraft, then I could keep her from getting even more suspicious. But as I stood there in silence with her watching me, my conscience gave me shit.
Suck it up woman! Do this for her, she has to know. She would tell you…
"There is nothing going with me and Jake per se." I said vaguely as I sized up her reaction. She focused on me even more intently and I knew my expression gave away my true feelings of utter terror. My mouth was dry and I was in desperate need of one of Bella's margaritas, but it wouldn't do us both any good for me to wallow in self pity and booze now.
"Spill it, Al. I know that look and it's a look of guilt. What is wrong with you? Do you have a problem with Jake? I can talk to him, you know. Whatever it is, we can all fix it together." It was important to her for me to get along with Jake. That meant she really cared about him. I couldn't believe I was going to crush her whole world – again. Why did this have to happen to me? I'm a nice girl and nice girls don't ruin people's lives. They bring out the best in people, right? But I had to realize that I wasn't ruining her life. In the long run, I was doing her a favor and once she got over her hurt, she would be happy that I told her. I had to believe that or else there was no way I could tell her the truth right now.
I pulled in a deep breath and fanned myself with my hand. Bella glared at me as I paced back in forth. I didn't know how to start.
Should I say, "Hey Bella, Jake is a massive tool and I caught him sucking face with that bitch." or maybe, "Jake is an effing dweeb because he's lying to you behind your back."
Ah, they both sounded stupid. I'd come to the conclusion that there wasn't a nice, easy way to tell your best friend that her fiancée was not who she thought he was. But I knew Bella wasn't who Jake thought she was either. This was the predicament I found myself in. They were both in the same boat. Neither one should be more mad than the other. Bella cheated on Jake and now Jake cheated on Bella. Both of them deserved to know and I was the only person besides Edward that knew. But for the sake of things, I would only tell Bella about Jake because I needed her to go with Edward. I had no obligation to tell Jake about Edward and Bella's affair.
I looked at Bella and placed my hands on her shoulders, "Sweetie, last night I saw something that I really wasn't meant to see." I closed my eyes because looking at her face was already painful enough. She knew right away what I was going to tell her. I could tell from the blanket of tension that suddenly enveloped the room.
"What did you see?" she asked in a low voice.
"I saw Leah and Jake outside…together…close…touching…too much." I said hesitantly as I brought my hands up to cover my face. Wiping away the mental images I had from last night was going to be futile. They were burned into my memory forever. I just knew that hooker, Leah, was up to no good. She had shifty eyes. You can never trust anyone with shifty eyes.
Although I hid my face from her, after a few moments of silence, I got curious. I peaked through my fingers to look at her and gauge to reaction, to see how well she was handling the news that Jake had touched another girl. I still chided myself for not giving him up fully yet. Baby steps.
Inadvertently, I was allowing Bella to come up with her own assumptions and if she happened to ask me point black, then I wouldn't deny it. Her mouth hung open and she looked like a statue. I swear I thought she'd stopped breathing.
I figured I had to say a bit more. "I saw him with Leah and it didn't look good." I decided to leave Edward out of it.
Removing my hands completely from my face, I brushed my hand on her arm, "Bella?"
Her mouth snapped shut in an instant and it scared to heck out of me, causing me to jump a couple of inches into the air. To my complete shock, she went from completely void of emotion to fearful and angry in a matter of microseconds.
"When you mean touching? Do you mean like friends, or more than that?" she hissed looking towards the window in Edward's direction.
"Morethan that." I whispered.
"Okay, that's great. I think I'm going to go wash my face and go outside." She jutted her chin towards the window, "He's been waiting for a while and I'm sure he's bored out of his skull."
Wait, what's going on here?! "Um…Bel?" I was seriously confused.
Correcting her posture, Bella puffed out her chest and stuck her nose in the air.
"I'm going with Edward. Do you know where my cell phone is, Alice? I can't find it."
Oh shit! It slipped my mind completely!
"To tell you the truth…you know, since a lot of truths have come out today..." I chewed on the inside of my cheek as I tried to think of a good way to put it that wouldn't make me seem like the bad guy. Got it! "Um, Jake dropped your phone in the sink and I swear I saw him do it," I lied as I crossed my fingers behind my back.
Bella broke out in a gust of laughter that bordered on hysteria, but I laughed right along with her, playing along, feeling terrible about lying to her. After all, today had been about truths, not lies, and now I'd just broken my own 'truth' streak.
I'd never openly given someone up to the wolves like that before. I had to admit that it felt quite liberating since I knew Jake deserved it. However, my thoughts were conflicted because up until last night, I didn't think he was that bad for her. I mean, he wasn't as good for her as Edward, but still, not bad. After everything I'd seen of him from last night, it made me wonder what the hell was going on in his head and why would he be messing around with that skank? It just didn't make any sense.
"Well, that's my luck. It just figures that that is my only way of communicating with him and he destroyed it. Maybe it's a sign…" I just nodded and gave a weak, fake smile.
"I'm sure Edward has all the numbers you need to get you home. And I can cover with Jake," I offered.
She nodded slowly and left for the bathroom. I hurried towards the front door, wanting to talk to Edward before she emerged.
However, Edward was nowhere to be found. I looked down the street to see if that ugly car was still here and it was. It looked like he had moved it up closer to the apartment. Also, I noticed that the rear view mirror was missing. Strange, it was there last night. I sighed. Oh well, at least he's still here.
"Minute one hundred and thirteen." A voice spoke up behind me. I turned around and found Edward sitting under the living room window.
"What?"
"I've been counting. One hundred and thirteen minutes so far. I was beginning to think that you two were going to start your own Janet Reno Dance Party." He winked at me as I rolled my eyes.
"We needed to vent."
"Oh, is that what you call that?" he smirked.
"Why are you sitting on the ground under the window?" I asked, looking him over. He looked more tired than he did an hour a half ago when he arrived. "You look terrible, are you out of your liquid upper?" I smirked right back.
"Caffeine just doesn't do it for me anymore. I just drink it out of habit now. These day, I'm running on trace amounts of cocaine and half a speedball that I took from evidence," he joked. "Anyway, I'm sitting here because I could hear better," he smiled knowingly, looking unbearably cute with his hat on his head and his jacket draped over one shoulder. I really didn't know how Bella was going to make it through the trip if Edward made me all hot and bothered with just a simple smile.
"So I guess you heard that I told her about Jake?"
"Loud and clear," he beamed.
"She doesn't know we both saw Jake so let her tell you on her own if she wants to. She's a little weirded out right now." I put my hand on my hip and eased my way back towards the front door.
"Ha! Aren't we all weirded out? I'm just as put off as she is. She's not the only person who was lied to." He focused his eyes mine as he got up from the ground and brushed off his pants.
He reached into his pocket and took out his keys, "Here, take these," he instructed. "The rental car jackoffs will be here in an hour to pick up the car."
I reached out and took the keys, feeling the hard, cold metal in my palm. "I'm sure you'll miss that beautiful piece of machinery," I smirked as I looked over at the car.
"Is the review mirror missing? I mean, it was there last night, right?" I asked, looking back at Edward warily.
"Um, ya, it was there last night. I tore it down earlier." He looked around, visibly embarrassed.
"Why would you do that?"
"Retaliation," he stated matter-of-factly. Just as I was about to inquire further, Bella rushed out of the door with her face freshly scrubbed, carrying her own duffle bag and suitcase.
"Alice, we're leaving." She gave Edward a nod. "You have Edward's number in case something happens. I mean it, if anything happens, call him, no matter what time it is."
"Hey, what the hell? Use your own phone!" Edward grunted as he fisted his phone in his hand, protecting it.
"Just shut up and get in before I change my mind," she sneered at him.
Bella stood in front of me, with red rimmed eyes and pulled me into a hug so strong that I almost felt my eyes pop out of my head. But I didn't care because it was a genuine hug and I knew things would be okay between us. It was forgiveness and appreciation all wrapped into one and she let me know in her own way without using any words, that our friendship meant more to her than anything.
I gave back just as much as she gave me, letting her know that I felt the same way. She released me and backed up, holding her duffle bag on her shoulder. Her suitcase was at her feet. Edward came up next to me and carefully planted a kiss on my cheek.
It lingered there for a moment after his removed his lips from my skin, as I watched him take her bags. She gave them up begrudgingly as she looked over her shoulder and waved at me. I watched as Bella got into the passenger seat and Edward into the driver's seat.
The engine roared to life and I saw the dark smoke from the exhaust penetrate the air. Edward released the brake and I heard the pop of the gear shift, then they accelerated down the street.
I watched as they disappeared from sight and I let out a deep sigh. I didn't get to say everything I wanted to today, but I'd done pretty well. There was still the fact that Bella and Edward didn't know I was moving to Forks to be with Jasper.
But I couldn't worry about that now. Currently, all I could do was hope that Edward and Bella would get everything out into the open during their trip so they could be happy and Jasper and I could share our moving in together with them, without it causing a rift between the four of us. I wasn't lying when I said that I had a feeling about those two. Things were going to change for them and whether it was for bad or good, I knew in the end, that I'd done my best for Bella.
As I told Jasper, I was doing a girl a favor.
A/N
And so the trip officially begins!! WOOT!! Tell me what you think. Did you like APOV? Tell me to keep writing her because I want too...LOL!
Special thanks to MissAlex, Punkfarie, Vamp-sessed, LittleLea05 and L is a Dreamer for being my coolest buds and Bfff'ers. Also three-barrels aka Lindsay made me a new banner in my profile, check it out along with a link to a new FB page that MissAlex and I created and admin, called The Official BFFF'ers of Twlight Fanfiction, it's a great place that ficsters gather and talk all things FF. We have teasers for stories, Robobession, fic rec's, gossip and much more. We're nice, you'll like us.
I would like to rec two fics,
A Constant in the Darkness by Camoozle and The Fallen Swan by SallyJupiter.
Both are very worth fics you should check out and I'm sure love.
So who's hopping in the back of the truck with me and going on this road trip? Review and I'll let you come along!