Chapter Ten
You were my sweetest downfall
I loved you first, I loved you first,
Beneath the sheets of paper lies my truth
I have to go, I have to go
Your hair was long when we first met.
Regina Spektor - Samson
"Whoa, you're looking rough this morning." Flack's cheery voice pierced the throbbing in my skull. I twisted my head towards him and narrowed my eyes. Laughing he raised his hands in surrender.
"I got hit with a cocktail truck." I whined donning my latex gloves.
"Ah you were with Stella last night?" Mac's voice came from behind me. I gave him a small grin.
"And Lindsey." I confirmed.
"Maybe I need to have a word with Stella about keeping my CSI's out to late."
"You do that and you know what she'll tell you…" Mac gave a knowing smile. As Flack moved into the conversation. He looked down at he jerking his thumb in the direction of the building. Mac shifted back towards the car, to retrieve his kit.
"You had the Kid Rock experience yet?" he asked me. I rolled my eyes at the memory of the thought engaging conversation between me and Kid.
"I pretty much got the once over, and then the dismissive look." I admitted. Flack crossed his arms over his chest frowning.
"And you ok with that?" I shrugged in response.
"He's the arrogant rock star type and I look a little rough today, I live with the knowledge that he's not attractive at all." I told him with the flash of a smile. The sides of Flack's mouth twitched. I heard Mac's footsteps behind us as we moved slowly towards the crime scene.
"Poor Kid…" he teased
"That's the truth!" I protested.
"He's an…" I was cut off as we walked past a patrol car by the crackle of the radio.
"Shots fired, possible officer down…" I felt myself physically stop dead and turn towards the radio.
"Isn't that…" Mac's response was my answer. He took off towards the car, Flack following close behind. Mac tore open the car door, pausing when he caught me trailing behind them.
"Carmen, you need to stay here. Secure the crime scene, I'll send Lindsey along to give you a hand." I let out a deep sigh of expiration nodding. Mac ducked into the car, slamming the door behind him. I grabbed Flack's arm before he could follow suit.
"I know I know, I'll call you when we find out what the situation is." Flack told me rushed. I took a step back as he threw himself into the car. I heard the noise of the car door vibrating from the fact it was slammed so hard shut. I waved them off before returning to limo to process it.
While waiting for Lindsey, I tried to recall anything about last night which may give me a clue to what had happened at Stella's place. I got nothing. As far as I could remember her and Lindsey and pretty much carried me up the stairs to my apartment, changed me into pyjamas and then called another cab after tucking me into bed. Thankfully a few minutes later Lindsey arrived to pull me from my brooding. Her eyes swept up towards me examining my face. She looked as rough as I did.
"You hear the call out?" she asked busying herself by opening her kit and putting on the standard latex gloves. I nodded, swallowing hard, trying not to think about what was going on right now at Stella's apartment. The apprehension on Lindsey's face seemed to be a little more than concern.
"I've told Don to call me when he gets a minute. As soon as I find out anything so will you." I said trying to comfort her. Lindsey gave me a warm smile, the dark look on her face not quite removed.
"So…" Lindsey began. "What do we have?"
I crouched on the ground opening my kit.
"Kid Rock's driver dead in the limo."
The lab was deadly quiet when my phone went off in my pocket. My eyes glued to the microscope, I took it out, flipped it open and put it to my ear.
"Devine."
"Flack." Was all he said, I withdrew from the microscope concerned by the tone of his voice.
"I'm at the hospital…Stella; she's in a bad way. We found her unconscious in her apartment, her boyfriend Frankie was shot three times in the chest. He's dead." Flack sighed. I bit my lip.
"They ran a sexual assault kit on her, she can't remember anything. The kit came back negative. There's bruising on her face, Mac's analysing the scene to see if we can piece together what happened from the evidence." I felt all the air rush out of me, conclusions bursting into my mind.
"Self defence?" I managed to get out.
"It looks like Frankie was killed by Stella. So we're thinking self defence." I felt tears well in my eyes at the thought of Stella being left broken and battered, alone.
"Is…" I choked and then retained control over myself.
"Is there someone going to be there at the hospital? I mean you know…someone should be there." I struggled.
"I'm going to be here."
"If anything comes up…" he cut me off.
"I know call you."
"Yea." I smiled.
"Hey you too." He said before we said our goodbyes. I hung up and went in search of Lindsey.
I leaned against the wall next to Stella's apartment door, keys dangling from my fingers. Hearing footsteps I glanced up, catching sight of Stella walking down the hall, head down, hair tied back. She looked up. Flack had warned me that the side of Stella's face was bruised, a cut above her eye. I held in the gasp that threatened to escape me.
"Carmen?" she said softly. I waved with the opposite hand slipping my keys in the back pocket of my pants.
"I didn't think you'd want to be alone tonight. I know you're too stubborn to ask." Stella stopped, in front of the door and got her keys out.
"Don called you?" she asked. I bowed my head with a dry chuckle.
"I threatened to shred his baseball card collection." I confessed. Stella gave me a small smile before opening the apartment door; I followed her in closing it behind me.
"At least they repaired the lock." I said surveying the hallway. Stella said nothing. I could tell she was processing the rooms, going through everything that had happened in each room.
Samson went back to bed
Not much hair left on his head
He ate a slice of wonder bread and went right back to bed
And the history books forgot about us and the bible didn't mention us
The bible didn't mention us, not even once.
I followed her into the bed room. The bloody rug was still there, spots of blood matted it. Stella ignored it and straightened a chair that had been knocked over in the fight for the gun with Frankie. I watched as she turned stopping in front of the rug, her eyes glued to it. I moved towards her, putting my arm around her shoulders.
"I'll get that. How about you pack an overnight bag and stay at mine tonight, at least until this gets cleaned up?" Stella shook her head. I pursed my lips respecting that.
"I'll stay here then." I said softly.
"Can I use your bathroom?" I asked Stella, whose eyes were still on the carpet, wordlessly she pointed at the door. I treaded carefully into the bathroom, my eyes going instantly to the bath. The blood still pooled in there.
You were my sweetest downfall
I loved you first, I loved you first
Beneath the stars came calling on our heads
But there just soft light, there just soft light
Your hair was long when we first met.
I picked up the shower head I turned on the cold water tap and watched the blood wash away as I doused it. The cord, she'd been tied with and the razor she'd used to free herself had been taken for evidence. Only the thick blood ran down the plug hole. I knew what had happened here. I forced Flack to tell me on the way over in the car, over the phone. After washing my hands I left the bathroom and wandered into Stella's bedroom. I froze surprised to see her packing an overnight bag. I watched form the doorway.
"I cleaned the bathroom." I told her quietly.
"Thanks." Stella looked up after zipping the bag shut, rubbing the back of her head sheepishly.
"Can I…" I cut her off.
"Of course." I said quickly. I moved towards the rug, knelt down in front of it and began to roll it up. When I was finished I placed it behind the dresser.
"In case you wanna get it dry cleaned or something." I told Stella, knowing her eyes were on me. Stella responded with a brief nod. I could see her starting to break.
"Hey come on." I said guiding her towards the door. Stella relented instead of the resistance I expected. I shut the apartment door behind me cursing Frankie for hurting such a wonderful woman.
Samson came to my bed
Told me that my hair was red
He told me I was beautiful and came into my bed
Oh I cut his hair myself one night
A pair of dull scissors and the yellow light
And he told me that I'd done alright
And kissed me till the morning light.
"The bathroom's through there, as well. You can take my room tonight, it's more homily than the spare room, it's still full of stuff, I couldn't be bothered to unpack." I confided. I walked into my bedroom showing Stella what it was like. She dropped her bag on the floor; it made a dull thud, before she sat on the edge of the bed. I could see her exterior breaking.
"I've got a shower and a bath, so help yourself to as much hot water as you want." I told her. Stella's eyes were glistening with tears now.
"Thank you, I mean for all of this." She said as tears ran silently down her face. I sat on the bed next to her and put my arms around her.
"Hey, it's no problem, you've had a really awful experience, I just want you to know that I'm here, and so is everyone else." Stella's defences snapped and a sob escaped her mouth. I turned my body towards her, letting her cry into my shoulder and stroking her hair.
"I keep seeing his face." She murmured. I pulled her closer feeling my own tears beginning to overwhelm me.
"It's ok Stella, I'm here." I told her. "I'm here." She gripped me tightly as she let it all out.
Samson came back to bed
Not much hair left on his head
Ate a slice of wonder bread and went right back to bed
Oh, we couldn't bring the columns down
Yeah we couldn't destroy a single one
And the history books forgot about us
And the bible didn't mention us, not even once.
I don't know how long we sat there, but Stella was the first to pull away, gathering herself, she was a pillar of personal strength again. She dabbed at her eyes with the back of her hand. I gave her a grim smile doing the same.
"I'm going to get a bath is that alright?" she asked. I nodded I followed her from the room and collapsed on the couch while she walked into the bathroom. This whole thing had shaken me up a little. There was an abrupt knock at the door. I stared at it. Images of a dead Frankie standing there. Shaking off my own idiocies I went to the door tearing it open.
You are my sweetest downfall
I loved you first.
Don Flack leaned in the doorway, head bowed. He looked up at me, his expression, tired and worn. The black leather jacket thrown over his shoulders, the top button of his blue shirt open, tie sticking out of his suit pocket.
"Can I come in?" he asked softly. I let out a sigh of relief. The sight of him brought the fresh tears to my eyes again. I opened the door wider, trying to hide them, only to find myself pulled into a warm comforting hug. I breathed in his scent feeling the fear and pain being driven out of me. He squeezed me tighter for a second before pulling away and closing the door behind him.
"Is she here?" he asked quietly. I moved towards the kitchen whilst he took the sofa.
"She's in the bathroom; I think she's going to be ok." I confided. I put the kettle on turning to him as he made himself comfortable.
"How are you doing?" I asked him leaning against the cabinet, eyes intent on him. He was silent for a few minutes as if trying to decide something.
"I can't believe it happened." He said finally. I wrapped my arms around myself.
"I don't think anyone can." I confessed. "Including Stella."
"It made me think anything can happen. I mean Stella's safe, she's careful all the time and this happened to her." He said helpless.
"You wouldn't be human if you didn't worry." I reassured him. I started automatically to make tea for three people in the tea pot. I knew Flack drank tea when he thought he'd had too much caffeine.
"What about you?" his voice was right behind me. I jumped. I turned finding him leaning on the work surface opposite to me. I set the mugs out in front of me.
""I'm doing ok..." I said still unsure of the honesty of that statement.
"I'm kind of worried about Lindsey though; she freaked out a bit about this whole thing." I looked up to see Flack's puzzled expression. I opened my mouth to speak as the bathroom door opened revealing Stella clad, in an elegant silk robe she'd obviously brought with her. She was towel drying her curly hair.
"Hey Don, I didn't realize you were here." Flack grinned in her direction.
"I came to check whether Devine here, was taking good care of you or not?" I snorted throwing a teabag at him. Both Stella and him laughed.
"Be thankful it wasn't a hot one." I said stirring the tea in the pot.
"I've made some tea if you want some." I told her holding up the tea pot. Stella nodded.
"I'm probably going to take the tea to bed if that's ok?" I poured her a cup out and added the milk.
"Of course it is." I said handing it to her and then went back to pouring mine and Flack's.
"Good night." Stella said before retreating to the bed room. I returned the gesture and handed Flack his own. He took it gratefully, and moved towards the couch. I took my usual seat at the end away from the mantle piece, and he took his on the opposite side.
"I let her have my room tonight. I thought she'd be more comfortable than in the spare." He nodded, distantly; I knew what he was thinking about.
"How are you doing really?" I asked. Flack tilted his head as if debated.
"I just keep going through the whole thing in my head. You know about how careful Stella is all the time." He said watching the ripples in his tea. I sipped from my mug.
"Frankie's gone now." I reminded him.
"Yea he is…but there's a million other Frankies out there." He commented. I shrugged.
"There's a million other Stellas too, maybe a whole of a lot more careful." I actually couldn't see how you could get more careful.
"So where do we go from here?" I asked my eyes on him intent. The startling blue eyes were on me suspicious.
"I meant after this incident with Stella." I told him firmly.
"Danny's got Lindsay's back, he was the on that calmed her down after the whole blowing up at the interview thing. We've got Stella. And Mac…Mac's got Mac. I guess the main thing this incident has shown me is that you're not untouchable, anything can happen to anyone." I admitted.
"What are you telling me you thought you were untouchable?" he asked me aghast. I gave him a dirty look.
"Of course not! I had someone else's hands wrapped around my throat last month. I know I'm not invincible." I shivered remembering Costa's eyes boring into me as his hands pressed down on my throat. I snuggled into the couch more.
"OK Scariest experience?" I said cradling my tea firmly in my hands. Flack tipped his head back starring at the ceiling for a minute; he turned his face to look at me.
"When I was a rookie, I got caught up in a shoot out. Bullets flying everywhere. I caught one in the chest. I was wearing a vest, but the shock, winded me, knocked me back straight on to the floor. I thought I dying, I was thinking about how I wouldn't see mom and Pops again, the things I never got to say. It really changed the way I looked on life for a while. I already know yours." His smile was genuine and warm. I rested my head on the couch not saying anything for a few minutes.
"If Elliot's death taught me anything, it's that life is precious." I confessed. I reached out putting my empty cup on the coffee table and then resettled myself into my previous position.
"I keep thinking about what would have happened if she wasn't so resourceful, if she hadn't grabbed that razor." I divulged.
"You think like that and your gonna start driving yourself crazy. She's here now, in your apartment, and she's safe." I bowed my head and stared at my hands.
"I know your right but why do I feel so scared?" I asked him, running a hand through my hair, settling my elbow in a position to prop up my head.
"The things put me on edge." I knew I'd started to ramble, but he said nothing to point that out. I let out a deep yawn. I put my hand over my mouth to cover it.
"I best be getting off, we're both on earlies tomorrow." He stood up, I followed suit.
"Earlies will be the death of me." I warned him darkly. Flack laughed gathering up his jacket and moving towards the door. He stopped before opening it, we feel into a mutual hug. I liked being here with him.
"Thanks for coming to check on us." I said pulling away reluctantly.
"It's my job." He shrugged opening the door. I felt a twinge of hurt run through me. He turned to face me.
"And besides I love you guys." He said ruffling my hair affectionately.
"I was just worried." He added. He crossed his arms over his chest frowning. I leaned in the door way, eyes never off him, a smile curving over my face.
"Well she's safe, we're safe, Frankie's dead, and if it helps I've always got a gun on me." He raised his eyebrows, his gaze going over my attire.
"You got one on you right now?" I rolled my eyes, reaching behind the door and yanking my Glock out of the drawer behind the front door.
"Always close to hand." I showed him it, and then returned it to its usual home.
"Sounds like you don't need me." He stated. I took a chance.
"I wouldn't say that." I pushed my hair out of my eyes.
"What you suddenly decide you need me now?" he asked, his expression unreadable.
"What… Where did this come from? Look I really like you Flack, I'm being honest and forth right about this." I stated.
"I like you a lot, I just… I wanna know where we stand." I said openly.
"Every day's like a yoyo with you, I'm never sure what I'm gonna be seeing each day." He snapped at me. I was taken a back.
"Right back at you. You remember that kiss…" he looked at me open mouthed. "You know the one where your pager went off." I was shouting at him right now.
"You started all this by running out, I didn't know what the hell was going on with you. I mean did it mean something to you because you sure as hell don't act like it. I don't know what the hell your thinking." I growled.
"What do you want me to say?" he asked exasperated. "You want me to tell you I like you? Do you? Because guess what Carmen I do. But we work together. And how do we keep those lives apart huh? Because we're running out of options here. I stared at him speechless.
"The lines are blurring too much. I'm sorry." He shook his head.
"I've gotta go. I can't be here." Suddenly he was gone. Tears pinpricked my eyes as I closed the door quietly assessing everything he'd just said.