Bella recalled the first time she had been on a stage to dance in front of strangers. She'd been nineteen, she was young, naïve and desperate. It was her last chance or else she was most likely going to die in a ditch by the time she turned twenty.
It took her two nights before she could take off all her clothes, before she could let strangers see her naked skin. The loud music made the stage vibrate, the drumming base pulsing through the wooden boards of the stage, coupled with her nerves, would shake her legs and force all coherent thought from her brain, which in hindsight, was probably a good thing.
The first time Bella stood on a stage, she couldn't dance for shit. She copied a couple of the moves that some of the other girls had done, feigned confidence, spun around the pole a couple of times but she made no tips.
As she dipped lower, using the pole to keep her upright, her eyes would sometimes meet those of the men staring at her, watching her. Some smiled, some smirked… But mostly they just stared.
The first time she removed her top, she'd done it with trembling fingers, her breath was trapped in her lungs and as the fabric dropped to the stage Bella had waited, expecting to hear the cries of pure outrage that some pathetic little girl would try and attempt to woo their lustful affections with her tits. She'd felt pathetic.
But not cries of contempt had come, no testosterone, guttural groan of pleasure had spewed forth either. The crowd was calm and collected, almost as if nothing at all had happened. As if this was the show that they were watching the entire time. Only the name of the girl changed.
And so Bella had danced, with her eyes half closed as she tried to picture that she was in her living room instead, and that she was only dancing for the pure pleasure of finding an awesome beat to move her hips to.
Riley had been the first person that Bella had become friends with way back then. She had been lonely, sad and insecure. He'd been the first man to ever smile her way while she hadn't been half naked. He'd befriended her, had bought her drinks and had flirted with her as though he actually liked her. Riley had exposed her to a new world and he was fun, he was charming, he was funny and he was really good looking. Bella couldn't believe that a guy like him would even look twice at her, let alone want to spend time with her.
The man had been a bouncer at the time; he'd promised her that he would protect her from the guys that touched her inappropriately. He assured her that she looked amazing and that she was sure to rake in hundreds if not thousands of dollars each night. He had made her feel as though she were the most attractive girl there!
Bella had fallen for him. And she'd fallen hard. It had been something that had slowly crept up on her.
She'd never been in love before, had found men to be generally repulsive and unappealing, but only because she spent day after day removing clothing for them, and sending coy, admonishing glances their way that would warn them that they'd gone too far. Each time a man's hand slid to grip her ass, her skin would crawl, breaking out in horrendous goose bumps and sending a tremor of fear through her body but instead of recoiling she would merely dance away from their groping hands.
Bella had been the one to approach Riley. He'd recently been promoted to the role of manager of the club that meant he had his own office. Bella had closed the door behind her, locking it as she looked up at Riley between thick, fake eyelashes.
"What are you doing, Bella?" He'd asked her. Back then; she'd been naïve enough to use her real name.
"I think you know…" she murmured as she crossed the room. Bella had been nineteen at the time. She was certainly legal, but Riley had been ten years her senior and hadn't been sure if fucking a teenager was the right thing to do. It was nice to see a man who still had a semblance of morale.
She'd kissed him. Hard. And he hadn't pushed her away, well not immediately. When he finally did, Bella persisted. Her hands, found the zipper of his jeans and pulled them down, finding his cock, stroking it until he was hard. And then Riley had pushed her against the wall.
She found the sensation of his hard body pressed against him to be hot. But then he'd slapped her. Across the face.
It didn't hurt. Not at first, it shocked her more. She certainly hadn't expected it. "Why are you acting like such a little whore?" He'd hissed at her. Hurting her. He slapped her again and then kissed her. Not knowing what to say or do, she kissed him back.
And then he was pushing her across the room, bending her over the table of his office desk and yanking her underpants down so that they were around her thighs. She hadn't even had time to process what was happening when he was inside of her.
And she found herself enjoying it. He fucked her like he hated her and when he was done, he rubbed her back, stroked her cheek in a silent apology as though he loved her. And Bella craved more.
From there things spiraled out of control.
One year later, with an addiction to an opiate drug, no money and nothing to call her own. Bella decided that enough was enough and that if she didn't want to fall deeper into this trap then she needed to get out.
Riley gave her the money she needed, even after she already owed him so much. He told her to get out, make something of herself and that he'd find her again in the future.
And he'd kept his word.
Five years later, Riley had found Bella. A little too easily as well, he'd shown up on the doorstep of her apartment demanding the money that she owed him. And it was certainly more than the ten grand that he'd initially lent her. "Interest." He'd said after dropping the bombshell that she owed him fifty grand and that she had eight months to pay it back or else he would pay for someone to kidnap her, kill her and toss her body in the bay.
When put like that, Bella had found it easy to walk back down that path again that led to her removing her clothes and dancing in front of strangers.
But she wasn't going back to a world of drugs. And she wasn't going to give sexual favors. Not this time. Bella might have returned to her past, but she wasn't going to stay there.
She'd done her very best to keep her secret from her friends. Rosalie and Alice and mostly everyone at the magazine that she worked for stayed clear of strip clubs and even still, Bella was very careful. If anyone walked in that she was familiar with, she'd avoid them. The club was big enough that it afforded that luxury.
Except she hadn't expected Edward to walk in and recognize her. Edward must have stuck to the shadows upon first seeing her, because she herself had never seen him, the realization was disconcerting. Who else had recognized her?
Bella had purchase a blonde wig to wear in replacement of her own hair. When Clara had questioned it, she'd shrugged and said that it was time for a change. She wanted to be a blonde.
She'd only seen him once during the week after meeting him at the club. Bella had done her very best to avoid him at all costs, she'd checked the hallway outside of their apartments after leaving each time to ensure that he wasn't standing out there.
The one time that she had seen him, she'd been with Rosalie and Alice, which meant that Edward hadn't had an opportunity to confront her about her night time job, again. He'd talked pleasantly with Rosalie and Alice. Bella had refused to make eye contact with him.
"What's your problem with him?" Alice had asked. "He's really nice!" Bella had snorted. "The only nice thing about Edward is watching him walk away."
"He does have a nice ass,"Rosalie had conceded.
"That's not what I meant." Bella frowned, turned her head and looked away.
Her friends had dropped the issue of Edward after that and they'd carried on doing and talking about what they normally talked about. Work, fashion, Emmett and Jasper.
Friday night had rolled around and Bella was getting ready for another night at the club. She wondered briefly if Edward would pay her another visit. She knew he was off, he shared the same shift as both Emmett and Jasper, and Alice had mentioned that she was going out to spend time with her new boyfriend. And so that meant that Edward wasn't working his shift at the fire station.
"What are you looking for, Bella?" She'd admonished herself as she picked up her bag and left her bedroom. It would be better if Edward wasn't there.
Rosalie and Alice had already gone out and so she had no one to lie to about where she was going, for which Bella was grateful.
Thanks for the helpful people that pointed out a few errors. I'm Australian and so when I write, I use British spelling. I usually go through each chapter and check for that sort of thing, but I rushed when I put this chapter up.
Please review and let me know what you're thinking of the story! :)