Dancing in the rain

by Linneagb

Years after the New Directions were discharged Blaine Hummel- Anderson is back. In searching for a new job he gets one at the library at wmhis and decides to get the glee club back. He knows that even with Sue gone it won't be easy but shame on the one who gives up because after all- life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass but learning how to dance in the rain. SYOC closed

10. I hate my life!

IMPORTANT NOTE DOWN BELOW

In this chapter there is a quite… racist word so to say used. I have used it for a character though, it's none of your characters so you won't have to worry about that. And it was to suit the character and storylines, I AM NOT A RACIST. To me it doesn't matter if you're white, black, mixed, Asian, green, blue or purple, I don't care if you're homo, bi, straight or whatever, and neither whatever religion you have. You could be a freaking dinosaur or glow in the dark if you wanted to but I wouldn't care just as long as you don't go on on the fact that I am not. So please no hate about it or any reports or anything. And if you've got a problem with it, PM or leave it in a review and I'll write it in another way.

THERE IS AN IMPORTANT NOTE ABOUT A COMPETITON AT THE BOTTOM.

Christie POV

On Wednesday afternoons I always had dialysis. It had been like that in West Bridgewater and somehow Carole had fixed so I would have the same times at Lima memorial. Hurray! I love my life! It didn't feel exactly great to do Monday's and Wednesday's homework- usually half an hour's work or something like that. And the Friday night movie in a hospital bad with hoses and chords and needles and… yep! I officially had the greatest life ever!

Sitting in the bus I looked to my left and saw a guy- about three decimeters taller than me and at least a hundred kilos heavier. Looking to the right I saw out the window and saw grey concrete buildings and trees that have been placed on the side of the sidewalk. Sidewalks and people walking towards wherever.

I hated this town! And I didn't want anyone to get me wrong on that- I loved my aunt, her husband and his son and his husband were alright. The nurses at the hospital were nice- because I had already been there three times since I came here not even a week ago. But so were they at West Bridgewater memorial too.

I hated my dad too. Hated the way he just kicked me out, I hated my mum for letting him do it and my brother Toby for just sitting around and watching it all happen. In fact- I hated everything about my miserable life that was with very high possibility become not very much longer than what it was right now.

I hated being ill, I hated everything about it, the meds, the side effects, the dialysis… and I hated the reason my dad had kicked me out. The fact that I was… "Miss!" The bus driver woke me up from my thoughts and I looked up and saw that except from me and him the bus was empty and we were by the hospital parking lot. "This is the end stop you need to get off if you don't want to go back."

I nodded and felt my cheeks go bright red before I stood up, grabbed my backpack and hurried out of the bus. Carole worked in the ER and I could see the sign hanging over the doors and that was practically the only thing that helped me find through the turns in the parking lot's asphalt to get to the freaking hospital.

"Hello honey." Carole stood right by the reception when I came in. "How did school go today?" I shrugged and climbed up on the chair behind the desk. Carole sighed but I could see that she was trying to hide it. "I'll go get your clothes from my locker. Wait here." I usually switched clothes from a heavy hoodie- about five sizes too big and jeans or sweatpants when I finished school for the day. So also when I came to the hospital, and Carole kept it in her locker in the staff's lounge during the day.

"Here you go" Carole handed me the plastic bag I had packed with things I'd need for this session of dialysis along with a box with a piece of hard bred, an apple and a small pack of juice so I wouldn't like die of blood sugar fall before we had come home and could eat dinner. I guess many would say it wasn't much- but hey! Try eating when your body can only take twenty grams of protein a day- and we'll see how much you'll eat for every meal.

"The nurses upstairs recognize you so you could go there right away. Oh… if you want to I can hold that while you go change, but I won't be able to come with you for yet a while. I'll come up as soon as my shift is over though." I didn't listen much to what Carole said. I had heard it all before, both from her and my mum who would always have something to do before she came to the hospital.

I gave Carole the box again and sneaked into the bathroom to change. What I had brought was a pair of the usual knitted socks and a onesie that my brother had saved all of his money to buy for me last Christmas. Say what you want about Toby- but he was sweet- and he was funny. And maybe that was why he had wanted to give me a onesie printed like a strawberry

"I can take that now." When I came back to Carole I grabbed the box with my food. "I'll see you later." Turning around and walking towards the elevators I could see people pointing and laughing at my onesie but I just glared at them and let it go. It wasn't up to them if I was going to wear something comfortable or something nice and fashionable.

"Well hello!" When I sat in the bed upstairs and looked out the window down at the parking lot outside suddenly someone came into the room and I flinched and then turned around to see an old woman coming in and sitting down on the other bed in the room. And a nurse who came with her and started fixing with the dialysis machine.

"My name is June. What is your name sweetie?"

"Christie. Nice to meet you." My voice was cold and monotone, I didn't want to actually tell her but mostly I just wanted to tell her to shut up so I hoped that my tone would just have her let go by it speaking its own language. But even I knew that saying nice to meet you was just common sense and was more about needing to do it than about wanting to do it or not.

"Christie? Is that short for something? Christine? Christina? Kristen?" I sighed… this must be the millionth time I was answering this question. About a girls' name that my dad had decided they would give me after a boys' name of a man I had never even met- Christopher Hudson, who had apparently been very good friends with my dad.

"No it's just Christie" I answered callously.

"I like your… dress." At last I turned my head to look at her again. "You look like a strawberry! You look so sweet I could just eat you up." June laughed while the nurse put the needle in. "Oh, ow. I felt that." She looked down towards her arm where the nurse had put her needle in and I reached for my book to try and get some peace.

"It's not often we see so young people here" June started talking again. "But I can see you're here for dialysis too." I nodded and sighed. "How old are you?" I answered her fourteen. "Wow. Do you want to know how old I am? I am eighty four. So I'm seventy years old older than you!" I for sure didn't give a damn about any of what she said. But I couldn't concentrate anyway so I laid my book to the side and decided to listen more to what she said.

"Hello" That night when I and Carole came home Carole shouted her usual hello's while I just stood there with my hands in my pockets and the zipper on my anorak pulled up as far as possible. "Oh… hey Ali" Carole's Portuguese waterdog came up and greeted us with licking and whisking tail. Staying extra-long by me when I sat down to untie my shoelaces with a toy in her mouth.

"Burt." Carole said in a moaning tone. "Did you buy one of those squeaky toys for Alice again? You know we will have wool and pieces of fabric from it all over the house before the day is over." Burt came out in the hallway looking mostly like a sad puppy himself as he said sorry like a little kid to Carole who pushed down his cap over his eyes.

"I went by feet and paws to buy food and I brought her inside with me and then she was biting onto that toy and I… you know I don't have the heart to have her let go of it" Burt explained himself. "And she… she just looked at me like that with the toy in her mouth and damn it… It would be easier telling no to Kurt than what it is to say no to her." He smirked just as Blaine came running through the living room door.

"Guys, guys, guys. I have come up with the perfect name for the glee club and Kurt says it's just totally me and I was thinking that you know we now have thirteen pieces of this club, and fourteen with me and the thing is that without one of these people the whole thing would just fall apart and then I heard this song and then I just had it, I just had it…"

"So what is your idea Blaine?" Carole seemed curious and eager to know.

"Every bit of glee" That was the last thing I heard before everything was suddenly just spinning around, I felt the color- or well- the little color there usually was on my face disappear as I reached out and tried to catch the others' attention without having to speak. Because I was afraid that with all of the spinning I was afraid I would throw up if I opened my mouth.

It felt like ages as usual, but probably only lasted for a second or maybe two at the most before my eyelids just got too heavy for me to keep my eyes open and I felt myself falling. But I did cross the thought that this wasn't supposed to happen, not now, not today, not right after dialysis but some other day when I hadn't had it for a while.

And then there was that last thought that always hit me when the symptoms got worse than other times.

"I hate my life!"

Martina POV

"MARTI" I woke up when my dad's shouting echoed through or house. "YOU NEED TO WAKE UP NOW. YOU OVER SLEPT" I swore out loud and kicked the covers off- not bothering about folding the covers for the day before I ran over to the wardrobe and pushed the door to it open, quickly choosing clothes for the day before I headed for the bathroom.

I hated over- sleeping, I knew I should have bought a new alarm clock because I knew that the one on my phone wasn't working! "MARTI" Dad shouted again and I, that was already stressed enough got caught in one of the holes in my ripped tights and was more or less thrown down onto the bathroom floor. "Are you alright?"

"I'm fine." I fizzled and tried to pull the tights on from sitting instead. Well this was a great way to get the day started in a bad mood. Dad was usually my best friend, which was a good thing because since my mum died in a car three years ago it was only me and him. But there came times when I just wanted to rip his head of- like when he was trying to hurry me and I fell and hit my head in the toilet bowl- Ew!

Or just make him try and put on ripped tights as fast as possible- with it being very important to actually get the feet through the right holes and not some other hole during the way! I sighed, I didn't in any ways regret the style of clothing I had decided to start wearing, but sometimes I wondered if it wouldn't be easier if I just started wearing jeans, T- shirts, dresses or whatever it was normal people would wear.

I'm done now" I jumped on one leg out of the bathroom pulling a ruffle skirt on over the tights almost making myself fall once again. This time dad caught me before I had lost my balance fully and helped me find the balance again before I grabbed my bag and a banana from the kitchen and ran outside to my car.

School started at half past eight, when I woke up it was ten minutes past eight and driving at a safe paste to McKinley since we lived in the middle of freaking nowhere would take fifteen minutes. So don't me ask me how I managed… but just as Mrs. Montague unlocked the door to the French classroom I ran up and got in the back of the crowd making their way through the door.

"Oh… Miss Kessler." Mrs. Montague smiled. "How nice that you want to join us today." I nodded- after running with everything I had through the hallways I was too out of breath to speak. "Well… no harm done." I walked before her into the classroom and threw my bag on the desk to sit by Esme Montague to get a chance to work together with her.

When I first moved here, six years ago, I and my dad had lived neighbors with the Montague's. I and Katrina- Esme's twin sister had used to spend much time together. Because even though I had taken pretty much every chance there was to spend time with Esme, she had mostly spent her time together with her best friend Sharon Fischer.

I hadn't gotten yet then why I was always doing my best to get Esme's attention. But three years later I had finally understood what it actually was turned out to be love, only to one day later lose my mum in an accident, along with my cat in the same accident and then moving to the other side of town to the middle of nowhere and a safer block.

Safer in more than one way. One- most of the people here were either too young or too old to drive, and two- if we would leave the front door wide open every night for a year we wouldn't have to worry a second about someone coming. And so I and Esme hadn't ended up in the same school again until we came to McKinley.

And… even though when I was little I was…. I was a social person, always trying to meet new friends whether it was in Atlanta where I had spent the first ten years of my life with mum, dad and my cat Gro. Or Lima- where we came when dad quit playing Baseball for the Reds and retired before we moved to Lima to be closer to the rest of the family.

In 2011 when we were moving from Atlanta to Lima I had tried to make mum and dad changed their minds and decide that we would stay in Atlanta where I had my whole life. Now, and the last three years back, I would have done anything to just turn back time and if not moving from Atlanta would mean that my mum had lived then I would have found a way for it to happen.

And within everything I had lost count of all of the problems. First of all my plan to come out to my parents had blown up and it had kept on doing so every time I had tried to tell my dad every time since then- he still didn't know I was a Lesbian. Second I just couldn't let people come close because what if I just lost them again and…. Third… I couldn't hear loud bangs or see blood without…

"AH" I was woken from my thoughts when a shout echoed through the classroom and a loud bang was heard behind me. I flew up on my feet and spun around. Spotting that Seth Phillips- Anderson had been sitting rocking his chair again and so lost balance and fallen backwards. That was what had made the sound and now when Seth himself sat up and pulled a hand forward from holding it on the back of his head and now had blood on his fingers.

Mrs. Montague hurried to Seth and sent him off to the nurse. But I barely knew it. I was following it all with my eyes wide open but…. Even with that the pictures from that terrible day almost three years ago kept on playing on and on behind my eyes. Gro jumping out of the grip in my arms and sneaking out the door when mum walked outside, the loud bang, running outside and blood… loads of blood.

I didn't even know what I was doing while I ignored Mrs. Montague speaking my name and just hurrying towards the door and out in the hallway. Since everyone were on their lessons now the hallway was empty but I still continued to hurry and ran down the stairs on shaky legs until I'd reach the bottom floor that was always empty.

I sunk down on the floor behind the stairs, my hair was already glued to my head with sweat and my breaths short and shallow. But I couldn't have noticed it less. The pictures kept on playing inside my head and with how real it was it was a miracle I didn't start shouting the things that I had been shouting then and let the whole school hear about my meltdown

.."MUM" I shouted with the loud bang and ran outside, mum's car was pushed up towards a lamppost and the whole front of the car- including the whole front seat seemed to be in about the same place as the back seat. I ran out of the house with dad right in front of me doing half- hearted attempts to make me go back into the house but didn't listen to him.

"MUM… GRO" In the grass by the road, right by what had been one of mum's car's tires laid my cat. My very, very best friend through my whole childhood, the one who had always been there when no one else was. Her grey fur was more of red than its natural color, spotted with blood, and I looked towards the car not to have to see it.

Dad was just reaching into the car, trying to reach my mum. Or more… what was left of her.

"MUM"…

With a sharp intake of breath I returned to reality. My whole body was shaking but my breaths getting deeper and slower. "You're okay" I said to myself. "You're okay." I had to do this- even though I didn't know.

I hated this, I hated having to be there once again every time there was a loud bang or seeing blood. I hated having to live through it again, and again, and again. It must have been at least a thousand times since it actually happened that once. Just as a constant reminder that it was too late, that everything was too late

I would have to find a way to make an end to it.

And there was that thought that never would never leave me alone when things got worse

"I hate my life!"

Lea- Marie POV

My last lesson for the day was cancelled, so between math class and the first rehearsal with the glee club I had almost two hours were there was nothing certain going on and I decided to just go swimming since I had all for it in my locker anyway. And it seemed to be that with my body just floating through the water the problems seemed to go as smooth and I could just forget about everything for a while.

And usually I could just keep them all away even for a while after I got out of the water. Stepping up, tying a towel around me, shoving my feet in my flip- flops and walking towards the locker room I managed to press the problems sneaking in away. It actually didn't make itself back until I stood in the showers, with way too cold water running over my head and washing myself when I glanced towards the tattoo on my collar bone.

"Caterina" the neat handwriting read. It was made of my mother's own handwriting- like it had been when she was alive. And that was where all of the problems had begun. It being just I and my dad we had moved from my home in Italy- the only home I had ever known as my own, to Lima, Ohio. Which was like the world's smallest town! I had spent one years with forcing myself out of bed some days, some days I was just done trying and didn't care for it. Dad had met Marion- and then everything had gone on from there.

Dad had asked me to come home right after the first glee- rehearsal today. Said he and Marion had something important to tell me. It wasn't hard for me to guess what it was about. I wasn't stupid for Christ's sake- it would take an idiot to not get by now that I would- within the next few months become a big sister!

But even if I already kind of knew what they wanted to tell me that was so important. I wasn't quite sure I was ready to hear the news yet. And I tried to push the thoughts away yet again as I pulled the silver necklace I had with a silver heart with an engraved L for Lea- Marie, tied my shoelaces, grabbed my bag and walked out into the hallway.

Well this was weird! The whole freaking corridor smelled of… plumbing and it for sure hadn't done that before I went to the swimming pool- and it wasn't me because people all down the hall were walking with scarves and shirts and whatever they had pulled up over their mouths and noses to keep the smell out.

I held my breath not to start gagging by the terrible smell and searched through my bag and found a scarf that I held towards my face while looking around for someone to ask. "Mrs. Montague?" I spotted the French teacher and caught her attention before she had continued through the hall- also she with a scarf held over her mouth and nose. "What's going on? What's that smell?"

"I'm not sure." She almost had to shout it- or she'd have to remove the scarf and the reason she wasn't going to choose that was quite obvious. "We think it's something with the school plumping. I'm not sure when it can be fixed. I've got to go now sweetie." She turned around and walked towards the stairs. Wow- well she just waved me off too rudely didn't she?

I couldn't do much else then to leave my things in my locker, and then walk to sit down outside the glee room. Maybe it would have been a better idea to sit outside but there was no way I would be doing that in this rain so I decided to just sit there on the floor and scroll through my phone on Facebook until the others started arriving.

Belle Jolie and a brown haired boy I didn't recognize came right after me. The boy had brown hair and I noticed him on the way he was the only one I had seen for a long while that didn't try to shot that terrible smell out- actually he didn't seem to be bothered by it at all- there must be something wrong with this guy! Like he totally lacked the sense of smell or something!

Right next came the short, scrawny girl I had seen on Monday before I signed up for the glee club. She sat down on the floor across the hall from me a bit away from Belle and the weird boy and glared around her. And then I noticed that she was the second one I had seen today who didn't seem bothered by the smell. Okay-a boy I could understand but her!

Another brown haired boy with the collar of his distance running jacket pulled up over his face came and sat down almost by me. And not until then I recognized him as the boy- yeah- Jazz or whatever his name was. The one who with his sister was supposed to go first at the auditions- as if!

"Hello!" The new one greeted happily and looked to Belle and her friend. "Hmm… Okay… I'm sorry for just going right on it like this but do you have some superpower- sense- of- smell so your nose filters this bad smell because like that you really shouldn't be able to even breathe in this!" He smiled crooked and let hear a short chuckle.

"Ugh," the first brown- haired boy pretended to moan. "No I haven't got any superpower, but I spent the first five years of my life in a town far, far, far away from here. Where I lived right next to a paper factory that smelled so badly that if the wind was in the right direction it smelled monkey in the whole town. So after all, this isn't too bad!"

"Where is it?"

"It's in Sweden." The answered. "A small town in the middle of nowhere kind of!"

"So you're Swedish?" The short girl looked up at the first boy just as everyone else started gathering and Mr. Hummel- Anderson came walking and unlocked the choir room. "But…" the girl tilted her head backwards to be able to look up at the boy. "Aren't Swedes supposed to be blonde?" The boy turned his head and looked at her. "And blue eyed?"

"Aren't Americans supposed to be fat?" The boy answered and grinned so she would get it was a joke. The girl looked down at her short, bony figure- even with too big sweatpants and hoodie on it was clear that she was barely more than skin and bones. And to me it seemed that the boy had gotten that comment before- and also given that answer before.

"So." Mr. Hummel- Anderson begun when we had all sat down in the back of the choir room, just as a tall, brown- haired boy came jogging into the room. "Don't worry, you're not late." The boy sat down by me and smiled slightly, trying to catch his breath after obviously running the whole way here. "So" Mr. Hummel- Anderson begun again. "Because of these terrible circumstances…." He had had to pull his shirt down from his mouth to speak but held a hand on his nose to show what he meant.

"…I'm going to try to keep it short. But I'm going to announce the first assignment for the glee club. But I will tell more about that later. First of all, I'm going to start with saying my name and a fact about myself, then I'll pass it over to you, and you say your name, your age, grade and a random fact. So… My name is Blaine Hummel- Anderson, I'm twenty three years old and I work here as a director for the glee club and in the library. I used to be in the former glee club that used to be at this school. So…" I tried to make him see me to go next. "Do you want to take it next ehrm… Dakota I think it was?"

The Hispanic boy that Mr. Hummel- Anderson had talked to waited for a bit and then spoke. "My name is Dakota Lopez, I'm fourteen and a freshman. I'm the youngest of five boys in my family- well six if you count my dad. Do you want to go next?"

For every time someone was passing it over I was trying to make myself visible for them. But they always looked past me or in another direction, and after it was Dakota's turn, he looked towards Belle Jolie.

"My name is Belle Jolie. I'm seventeen and a junior. I like designing clothes. Do you want to go next Seth?"

"My name is Seth Anderson- Phillips. I'm sixteen and a sophomore. As some of us were talking about earlier I'm from Sweden, but if I hear one more person ask if Swedes aren't supposed to be blonde I'm going to scream out loud." He joke- glared over the group. "Thank you! Do you want to go next Jasper?"

"My name is Jasper Birch, I'm also fourteen and a freshman. I love my sister, we auditioned together but she didn't make it in! Do you want to go next?"

"My name is Christie Kyemohr. I'm fourteen and a freshman" The short girl's sounded low and hoarse. "And no, Christie isn't short for anything." She leaned back in her chair again and I couldn't help but notice that she looked exhausted. "Oh… do you want to go next?"

"My name is Esme Montague, I'm sixteen and a sophomore. And if someone refers my name to the twilight saga or to Romeo and Juliet I'll make your life a living hell" she grinned so everyone would know she was never going to make reality of that. "Do you want to go next?"

"My name is Martina Kessler, I'm sixteen and a sophomore. And vampire diaries and baseball are the two best things existing on this planet! Do you want to go next?"

"My name is Sharon Fischer, I'm fifteen and a sophomore. And I swear I'm not really too addicted to coffee. Do you want to go next?"

"My name is Charlotte Amato, I'm fifteen and a freshman. I like to wear grey and blue clothes." I looked the girl up and down, she was in fact wearing mostly grey and blue with blue cover- all jeans- shorts, a grey sweater printed with panda's, a grey beanie, several thin bracelets in silver and different shades of blue, along with a white, blue and brown backpack and ragged brown ankle boots. "Do you want to go next" I sighed when yet another time someone else was chosen.

"My name is Daniel Vincent, I'm eighteen and I'm a senior." He scratched his neck and seemed to wonder about what to say. "And I'm so bad at cooking I can't even cook oatmeal without messing it up- no, not even in the microwave." There were a few spread laughs in the room- wow- he must be so bad at cooking. "Do you want to go next?"

I was surprised when I realized that out of everyone that could have, Daniel- the Daniel Vincent- like the school's hottest guy had asked me. And it was there and then that I decided that no matter what it would take- I would have to make Daniel Vincent mine! "Hello- o. Do you want to get on?" I woke up from my thoughts.

"My name is Lea- Marie, I'm fifteen and a sophomore. And in a few years, you and everyone else will know my name." I dreamed away for a bit- I would be big, I would be famous, travel all over the world and… well those were just dreams so far, and most of all I just wanted to get away from this nowhere and home to Italy. "Do you want to go next?"

The boy I had asked had stitches on his forehead, he pushed himself up and wondered for a bit. "My name is Bradon Fredericks, I'm sixteen and a sophomore, and I knew that guy on the picture" he pointed to a plaque on the wall with a picture of a boy- maybe in his late teens. "Keags, you're the only one left. He turned his head and looked to his friend who sat right by."

"Well…" Keags or whatever his name was clapped his hands together and stood up turning to us all. "Half the school seems to know already, so I might as well let you know if you don't. My name is Keagan Spencer, I'm sixteen and a junior. And I was born a girl, but I've known since I was little that I actually was a boy. And if anyone's got a problem with that, come to me, and not to anyone else. Thank you."

Keagan sat down again. The room had fallen all silent. "That…" Jasper Birch started at last. "….Is so awesome!" Keagan chuckled. "No I mean it. That is so cool!" Keagan shook his head, not because he didn't agree but because apparently Jasper was a bit silly- I- I didn't know what to think about anything so it was a good thing when Mr. Hummel- Anderson spoke up again.

"Well that's… that's really awesome to know a little fact about you all. Now I just need to remember who has which fact." He smirked. "So well, the first assignment for this glee club is to get in pairs and do each duet, the song can be about anything. But the only rule is that you need to pair up with someone you don't know too well, you can choose yourself." Blaine sighed.

"One of you will have to do with me, because right now we are thirteen, I'm going to try and make it an equal number for assignments like this but I can't promise anything." Okay- no way I was doing it with a teacher- no way! "Okay, you just choose a partner each and I will fix a bit here." Almost before he had finished the sentence I had turned to Daniel. I needed to do this with him.

I tried to get his attention, but he had already turned away and seemed to have found a partner in Christie Kyemohr. Br*t! I turned back and tried to find someone else and everywhere people were pairing up, Seth and Bradon, saying something that I couldn't understand, Keagan and Jasper, Belle and Charlotte. And before I knew it everyone had a partner.

And during circumstances I was still in the world's worst mood when I came home and threw my shoes off in the hallway, just to hear the sound of Marion- once again throwing up in the bathroom and dad trying to calm her down. "Dad." I pushed the door to the bathroom open. "There was something you wanted to tell me!?"

"Sorry, sorry honey." Dad didn't even look at me or stop to stroke Marion's back. "It will have to be a bit later, maybe another day. I'm sorry." He used all of his attention to Marion again and I pushed myself up from leaning against the wall and started walking upstairs, where I threw my bag in a corner, and myself on the bed.

I knew what was going on! There was no doubt about it and there was no other reason dad would all of a sudden care for Marion- his stupid girlfriend more than what he cared for me. It wasn't fair! I had been here long before she was, she had only just come in. And now our whole lives were going to change because of that!

And there was that thought again, the one that I couldn't keep away on days like this.

"I hate my life!"

Daniel POV

I looked around the room when Mr. Hummel- Anderson announced what the first lesson in glee club was. I didn't notice the girl with the olive skin trying to get my attention and turned up to the girl who sat on my left almost behind me. "Hey." I greeted her when I'd gotten her attention, and not until she looked at me I recognized her.

It was the girl that I had seen on the bus three days ago. The one who was so skinny she looked like she was constantly starving, and she was also very short. I noticed the dark spots right under her ear this time too but I shook the weird feeling off and started speaking to her, even though she was mostly glaring at me.

"Hi…. Christie was it right?" She nodded. "Well I'm Daniel, but you might already know that. So maybe… maybe we could do this together since… I don't know you but it would be great getting to know you." Christie shrugged as if she couldn't care less. "Well… is that a yes?" I had to admit that answer confused me.

"Sure if you want." She said callously and I stood up and stepped up so I'd sit right by her just as the others as well started pairing up. I glanced towards Christie and eyed her up and down. I couldn't get where this weird feeling came from. Maybe it was just that she looked like her… yeah that would have to be it!

Most of the others sat with their shirts or scarves pulled up over their mouth and noses, I had pulled the collar up as well but it made it too warm and hard to speak, I wasn't too bothered by smells anyway… But… Christie she didn't do anything like that. And maybe I shouldn't even have noticed, but I still couldn't let the feeling go.

"So… have everyone got a partner because if I've counted this right there should be one person who haven't got one?" He glanced over the group. Well… that was until the girl with the olive skin- I couldn't remember her name spoke up. And Mr. Hummel- Anderson as well as everybody else turned to her.

"Oh come on. I don't care who I'm going to do it with but I am not going to be like some loser and do it with the teacher." The room fell silent again until she spoke up again. "Not a chance, I'm not doing it!" Mr. Hummel- Anderson frowned and scratched his forehead, and then pulled out a paper and a pen from his bag that he laid by him on the piano.

"I'm afraid that if there's no one else for you to do it with so you're stuck with me. So we'll move on." He scratched his neck. "We'll be having two rehearsals a week usual weeks. When sectionals comes closer we'll have more and…" He pulled out another paper and put it next to the other one with another paper. "I want everyone to write the couples they're in on this paper, and their name, cellphone number and e- mail address on that other one. And when everyone's done it I'll just have a few more things to announce and then we will finish for today."

The one in the front line amongst the first stood up first, I waited while Christie walked down and asked Mr. Hummel- Anderson something, he shook his head and then signed to me to come and get our names on the first list. It was when she grabbed the pencil and wrote very slowly I couldn't help but notice that her fingers were all swollen- so swollen it made it hard for her to get a good grip of the pencil.

"Do you need help with that?" I asked, my voice weaker than what I had planned. No, no, no. No it couldn't be it! There would have to be some explanation to everything. I was just being paranoid and saw things that weren't there it couldn't be it- not again! It wouldn't happen twice… there was no way it could!

Christie glared at me, but when Dakota Lopez- who stood by me along with Sharon Fisher made a comment about how slow she was and exclaimed "Get finished sometime this year!" she looked to me and then spelled her name while I wrote it, and right after I wrote mu name right by hers. She didn't sign the other paper and shook her head when I asked if she wanted help with that too, but I noted my name, phone number, and e- mail- address.

"So that's it, I've only got two things more. First of all, our rehearsals will be Tuesday and Thursday, I've checked everyone's teams and everything and most of you have Monday's and late Tuesday's and Thursday's so it should be fine to everyone. And second, as you've probably noticed to call me Mr. Hummel- Anderson is just awfully long!"

"What are we supposed to call you then?" The girl with the olive skin and- as I noticed now, some sort of European accent asked. "You're a teacher?!" Her rude was quite rude, and I wondered how much of Mr… whatever we should call him now's self-control it took to actually just smile at her and continue.

"I was getting to that. And that's actually the thing. I am not your teacher, I am the director of the glee club but I do it for fun and I haven't got any education on being a teacher- I also work in the library. And the thing is- my last name- before I married, was Anderson. And I do not want to be just Mr. Anderson- my dad is Mr. Anderson… So when you guys want to call out for me or whatever…. Just call me Blaine."

"But" Keagan Spencer started. "You're still kind of a teacher… so… well at least to me it would be really weird not calling you mister… so how about Mr. Blaine?" several others- including me nodded agreeing but Mr. Whatever protested. "Mister Blaine, Mister Blaine, Mister Blaine…" Keagan shouted over and over again, stomping both of his feet and hitting his fists towards his knees in the rhythm of the words.

The boy with the stitches on his forehead- I was terrible on remembering names did the same, Mr. Whatever shook his head but then I and the girl in the blue and grey clothes got along too, and when Dakota and Seth did the same afterwards, and soon everyone was doing it. "OKAY, OKAY." Mr. Blaine shouted at last. "Mr. Blaine is okay, but call me just Blaine if you want to and I hear someone say Mr. Hummel- Anderson and they're suspended from the glee club."

Everyone had been voting on Mr. Blaine at last, sitting stomping their feet and hitting their fists towards their knees. But when I turned my head and looked towards the scrawny girl on my left, she was still sitting with the hoodie wrapped around her as if she was cold, just staring emptily in front of her as if she couldn't give a damn about anything around her.

"So that's it for today." Mr. Blaine started talking again and with a growing worried gut- feeling inside of me I had to turn back to him. "I'll e- mail and text- message you all tonight so you've all got my e-mail and cellphone. I want you to answer it all so I know I've gotten the right ones. Ehrm… how many here have got Facebook" everyone except for me raised their hands.

"Daniel… have you been thinking about getting one or so?" I shrugged… I haven't really thought about it but I had nothing against it. "Oh well… I'll start a group for us so it'll be easy to you all at once when I need. Daniel can you at least consider getting one" I nodded. "Thank you. So that's it… off you go. Next rehearsal is Tuesday at four but you will have to rehearse a bit on your own throughout the weekend and so. Bye."

I stood up and walked down onto the floor, but Christie had started talking to Mr. Blaine about something and I didn't want to interrupt. On top of it all my basketball practice started in twenty minutes so I'd have to get changed and everything and I walked down to my locker and got my basketball and my bag just as Mr. Blaine and Christie came walking down the hallway and I couldn't help but hear them.

"This smell is getting really bad… I hope they can fix it soon or I guess they will have to close the school down because everyone gets sick because of the smell." Blaine let hear a short chuckle- I didn't care much for it. But it was Christie's reply that hit me harder than the train, and I just couldn't breathe.

"I can't really feel neither smells nor tastes as I should. I barely smell it. Is this where I'm happy I've got renal?" I tried to seem as if I haven't heard or anything but it felt as if someone had put a belt tightly around my chest and I felt the other symptoms of a full- blown panic attack coming on and didn't really know what to do.

I wasn't sure about how I got there, but it was a miracle I hadn't thrown up, fainted or both until I sat on the bench by the wall in gym and barely noticed Coach Michaelson coming up to me, obviously not noticing my current state- or just didn't care about it. And maybe it was best that way.

"Dan." I woke up from my thoughts. "You'll need to go change, you know I don't let anyone play in jeans and converse etc." I nodded. "Well come on then… you know that new guy right." I nodded. "Yeah Leigh or whatever." I nodded- I had met that guy- Liam Linnel- he was nice, a good guy and good at basketball. "Yeah… if you don't come to practice and everything, you know that guy's going to shine over you. And you can't let a n***er do that can you?"

The word and the tone when coach said it had me looking up. I didn't have anything against either white, black, mixed, Asians or anything else- but obviously coach did. And I'd better do as he said or I would be kicked out of the team any time so I agreed against my will. But even though what he said I knew I couldn't train today.

"Coach" I switched subject. "I'm sorry but… I feel terrible, I think I have a migraine coming on and I'd like to get home while I can still stand on my feet. I've got to go home." I stood up without waiting for an answer and even though I knew the risk I ignored coach's shouts after me- I just had to get home.

Walking through the hallway I barely noticed the music coming from the choir room with Mr. Blaine standing in the doorway. But it didn't hit me that I maybe should have stopped to listen or whatever. I just needed to get home and that as fast as possible.

Well whatever home was! When the wheels of my bike finally rolled up on our driveway and I stumbled up the porch steps and fumbled with the key it was going to an empty house to at last, as the door closed behind me just collapse in the hallway. My knees buckled under me and for a long while I just lied there without having anything to do about it.

And there was that thought, the one that was always there when I was reminded of everything I had tried so hard to suppress.

"I hate my life!"

The song Blaine gets every bit of glee from- with every bit of me- Kevin Borg

June is portrayed by June Squibb. Like I said earlier Alice is portrayed by my Yippie.

And if anyone wonders, no I'm not from the town that Seth is talking about

COMPETITION ABOUT GLEE CLUB NAME DOWN BELOW

So, as you probably saw the name for the glee club is a bit… well it isn't that good. So I've decided that further into the story Blaine will change his mind and decide that "Every bit of glee" will be something else and come up with anything. So I've decided to make it a contest, I want each and every one of you to send in something that could be used as the name of the glee club- like New Directions or Vocal Adrenalines but nothing already taken. The ones that aren't chosen for this glee club will possibly be names of glee club at sectionals etc. There are just a few rules- that will be very easy to follow, read them carefully.

Nothing that's already taken on the show

Send it in a PM in a new conversation, if you want to send in more then use the same conversation

You can send in as many names as you want.

I will keep it open for as long as I need

No hate if I don't choose yours

The most important rules-be creative and have fun.