Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in the Sound of Music. Maybe someday I will, who knows? Fat chance! Lol.
Author's Note: Well, here is the next chapter as I promised you would read this Week-end. Thanks so much to DragonHuntress, foreverliesl28, Alwayshappy, murieann, 9999 and Kristine for their reviews on chapter 9. What can I say? Without your support, I would never be able to continue writing this! Now the next chapter should be what you are hopping for (at least what I'm hoping for). So please, review, and I will try to update very very soon.
Now read and enjoy!
Edward had been standing in front of the door for ten whole minutes, not really knowing what to do.
For God's sakes! He was supposed to be getting married in a day! What had happened?! Something like an hour ago, everything was fine, he was feeling like the luckiest person on earth; he was finally going to marry his wonderful and beautiful Maria! But what now?
He felt sick to his stomach. He was lost. Completely and utterly lost.
Deep inside, in his heart, he had had to admit to himself that he had seen it coming. He had known since the first day he had met Georg, that something deeper than friendship existed between the captain and Maria. Each time they looked at each other, their eyes sparkled with happiness and hidden love . They didn't need to speak to know exactly what the other one felt. He couldn't do that with Maria, he couldn't really understand her fully. He couldn't detect straight away how she felt, or what she wanted. Georg could, he thought bitterly
Raged surged through his body. Why could Georg do it and not him?! He was sure he loved Maria as much as the captain did! Then why could she not respond to him as she did to the captain?!
One simple answer: she was in love with Georg. His heart was bleeding upon thinking those words in his head. He put his hand on his heart; he could almost feel the pain through his fingers.
He was so angry against the captain, so enraged he started to hit the hard walls surrounding him. He only stopped when his fists were bleeding.
He sat on the floor, panting. He had to do it. He had to break up with Maria, because he knew she would not break off the engagement with him, not to hurt him. He let out a bitter laugh. His heart was already broken anyway.
He loved her, more than he would ever love any other women, he was sure of that. He had dated before Maria, and had enjoyed the company of charming, beautiful, and wealthy women, who had cared for him a lot. But he had waited all his life to meet someone like Maria; to meet his true love.
Now if he could not have Maria's heart, then the one last thing he wanted, was for her be happy, even if it meant being with somebody else. He would not have thought it possible for him to say that, but Maria was worth it.
Slowly, he got up from the floor, and opened the door. It was dark, he couldn't see much. He heard a soft voice coming from the sitting room, and followed the sweet sound.
Maria was cuddle up on the couch. Her arms encircling her legs, she was singing my "favourite sings", while gently rocking herself back and forth, tears streaming down her face. He knew what this song meant for her. She had told him that whenever she felt sad, or discouraged, she sang a song she had made up about all her favourite things. Only Maria would think about such a thing to do in a moment of crises. He had always admired her for that. She said it always made her feel better. But it didn't seem to be working right now.
He was heart broken to see her looking like that. He walked towards her, needing to do something, to wash away the pain he could see so clearly in her eyes and hear in her voice.
She didn't seem to hear him approach, or if she did, she didn't show it. She looked miles away.
He walked next to her, and whispered; "Maria, it's me."
She snapped back to reality, and turned her face to look at him.
"Oh, Edward!" she cried out.
"Maria, darling Maria, it's all right, I'm here now." He said gently while gathering her in his strong arms and hugging her tightly, while she cried her heart out, her face against his comforting chest.
After a while, she stopped crying, it seemed she had no more tears left in her to shed. He kept her in his arms, enjoying the last night he was going to be able to do that.
"Maria, I need to talk to you", he said, reluctantly letting her go of his arms.
She lifted her head up to look at him, fear clearly written in her eyes.
"Maria", he stopped to take a big breath, and then continued. "Maria, I can't marry you."
She looked at him, astonishment and sadness filling her. She opened her mouth to say something, and then closed it again. She too, felt lost and confused, as much as he did.
"I heard everything tonight. I was in the corridor, when I heard you and the captain shouting through the door", he explained, his voice not sounding angry, just sad and resigned.
She stared at him in horror. What must he be thinking of her?! That she was some kind of whore,that she had been cheating on him all along! Well, she had in a way, but until tonight, she had never been intimate with the captain. Oh god, she felt so ashamed of her! She disgusted herself! She didn't deserve his love, she didn't deserve the captain's love, she didn't deserve anything!
She didn't even deserve to sit next to him! She started to get up, not wanting to contaminate him by their closeness. But he stopped her by grabbing her hand.
"No, stay! Maria, you are not in the least to blame. It is my fault."he simply told her.
"Edward!" She started to protest.
How could he think for one moment that he had anything to blame himself for?!
"No, please, let me finish, he begged. She fell silent. "It's my fault in the sense that I knew all along your feelings for the Captain. Well, at least I guessed them the night we met him at the restaurant. The night I saw him for the first time.
She was too astonished to speak. How could he have known then? Could her feelings have shown so clearly on her face? She felt horrid! He had known for ages that she was not being honest with him!
"No don't!" He could clearly see what she was thinking. "Don't blame yourself for it! I know you tried to avoid having those feelings, I know you tried to battle against this love."
"How do you know?!" she said bitterly. "How can you still trust me after tonight?! How can you bare to sit next to me while I haven't been honest with you for months!" she cried.
"I know Maria! I know it because I know you better than you give me credit for!"
"I…"
But he didn't let her finish her sentence. "You are a good person Maria, you are sweet, gentle, considerate, and I know you would never try not to hurt me if you could avoid it."
"Edward! If I really was a good person, I would not have been dishonest with you! I will never forgive myself for it! Never!" Tears were shining in her eyes, making them look like precious stones.
"Maria, listen to me! He urged her. He took her hand in his again. She tried to back away, but he held her tighter.
"I love you! I always have, since the first day I set my eyes on you. But love is not a one way street. I've been selfish to want to keep you for myself when I knew that you didn't feel the same way about me. Don't get me wrong, I know you loved me, but I also know that you were not in love with me, at least not the way I was."
"Edward, I'm so sorry! So sorry!"
"Maria, it's all right. Somehow, as much as it hurts me to tell you all this, I feel lighter. I think we would not have been completely happy together. You, because you would always have had remorses and regrets, and me for not being able to give you all you deserve, and from preventing you to be truly happy. Now, I want you to promise me something."
"Anything! Anything at all!"
"I want you to go find Georg, and tell him that you love him."
"What!"
"That's right! I want you to be happy Maria, even if it's with another man. I couldn't live knowing you were sad. Will you do that for me, Maria?" he was looking at her intently, and what he saw warmed his heart.
She was staring at him, astonishment and hope filling her eyes. Hope. He had not seen this feeling in her for so long!
"Edward, what can I say?" Tears were streaming down her face, but they weren't tears of sadness, but tears of hope and gratitude.
"Say you will, that's all", he stroke her cheek gently.
"Oh Edward! She hugged him tightly. He buried his face in her hair. Oh, how he was going to miss her!
"How can I ever thank you enough?"
"By being happy."
"But what about you?"she asked breaking the hug to look at him, looking concerned.
"Don't worry about me! I'll survive. Maybe I'll find another Maria in this world. Even though I think I will have trouble finding someone who sings "My favourite things" or who says she has rheumatism at 21 years of age, when she sits on a pinecone! He said with a twinkle in his eyes.
"How do you know about that? She asked embarrassed.
"I have my sources."
They both laughed, feeling relieved to have said what was weighting so heavy in their hearts.
"Edward," Maria said after a few minutes of silence, "can we still be friends?" she asked scared to hear his answer.
"How can you ask me a question like that?"
Her lips trembled.
"Of course we can!", he added quickly upon seeing her distress. "I would feel so lost if I couldn't see you again! And it makes me feel better to know you will come to me whenever you're in trouble, that I will be your confident when you are in need of comfort. I would not give this up for the world!"
Her eyes started to water again. How could he be so wonderful? She was so glad not to have lost his friendship! She would never have been completely happy if she had.
He took her again in his arms, and kissed the top of her head. She let herself relax in his embrace, all the stress, the fears, the doubts she had held inside of her for so long had worn her out. She felt happy, but exhausted. She closed her eyes.
He held her tight for a long time, never wanting to let go. She had fallen peacefully asleep in his arms. Now was the time for him to go. He had done what he had to, and even though he still felt a sharp pain in his heart, it would eventually heal. Maybe not straight away, but at least, he would see Maria happy. And that was a comforting feeling.
He took her gently in his arms, and carried her to her bedroom. She didn't wake up. He laid her carefully on her bed, and pulled the covers on top of her. She looked so beautiful in her sleep, so peaceful, like an angel. He brushed a few hairs off her forehead. He could still see the traces of her earlier tears on her cheeks. He bent down and kissed her lips lightly for the last time.
"Goodbye my darling Maria, and be happy." He whispered.
He quietly left the room, but before he shut the door he heard Maria whisper: "Thank you."
He smiled and shut the door quietly behind him.
So, what do you think?