Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin or any character and plot present in the tv show. I only own my main OC Asah, the plot surrounding her, as well as some other minor characters.

Chapter 10

There was some time again before Asah's life changed drastically again.

After the King's feast, she was brought a pile of books along with a leather bound notebook and quill and ink. Asah stared at the pointy end of the quill, thinking the Queen to be stupid to give her a weapon she could escape with, and then pondered.

Since her arrival at Camelot, she had not been tortured. She had not been overly underfed; she'd been given fresh clothes and water to clean herself; and she had been brought something to entertain herself with. The King had been nothing but indulgent to her since he permitted her small self to live and it began to puzzle her more and more now that her stay reached nigh on six months.

The visits were few in-between, and even the traitor Mordred did not come to survey her as he once did; but she found herself longing for the still-eluding serving-boy. The one she had been meant to kill, the one who beat her so easily. Merlin.

She also knew why he was avoiding her. She was a druid, she now knew who he was, and if she ever escaped, she'd surely tell Morgana what she'd learnt. But she wouldn't tell a soul. Because Emrys, for all his cowardice and his treachery, was the most powerful sorcerer in the world, and he'd crush her in his palm.

So she found herself reaching out the way only druids could, were they blessed with magic or not. Her powers might have been harnessed, but she could still converse mentally with her kind. She felt Mordred's pure power nearby – surely training – and kept searching until she found the pulsing fire erupting from her target.

She kept silently whispering "Emrys… Emrys… Talk to me…" but no one answered, leaving her disappointed and tired. She'd try again from time to time, but he'd never answer.

Until one day, the King himself came back to see her, an escort with him.

Mordred was there, as was the Queen and the handsome brown-haired Knight she did not know the name of. Arthur Pendragon was carrying a large coin in his hand, and he showed it to her in lieu of a greeting.

"Do you know what this is?" he asked, not harshly but not nicely either.

Asah smirked. "Good day to you too, Your Majesty." There was a look of surprise between Mordred and the other Knight, and she quickly realised she had been addressing Pendragon with an almost-deference he did not deserve. She got back to her cold composure in no time. "This is the Disir's judgement. You have to answer it."

"So you know of it."

Asah stole a glance to Mordred, who imperceptibly shook his head. "Every druid knows of it. When you receive it, you're as good as dead. If you do not answer it, magic will make sure you die. If you answer it, there's a good chance you'll die even then." Her smirk widened. "I can only guess what your judgement would be, Arthur Pendragon."

"And what would it be?" he asked, a hint of sarcasm in his voice.

She gestured around her. "You imprison the Disir's people. You kill them," she added in a growl. "The Triple Goddess will not be pleased." And she turned around, her way of dismissing those who could not be dismissed.

The King sighed, and moved to leave. "Thank you for explaining." And they all left.

Asah only then realised that not once since Mordred had visited her the first time, had someone said her name. Meaning they still did not know it. He hadn't said. She felt lighter for it; and at the same time, she longed to hear her given name again.

And she longed even more for the warmth of the sun on her ever-pale skin…

"Emrys…" she tried again. No answer.

And then Asah also realised that she hadn't once tried to contact she whom she gave allegiance to. She could have. And she hadn't.

And she had no wish to try even then…