The scene outside looked like something out of a disaster movie. The late Admiral Marcus' unholy warship, the USS Vengeance had been crashed into San Francisco by the equally unholy superhuman, Khan Noonien Singh. Vengeance had apparently been the word and motive of the last few days. Vengeance against Admiral Marcus, vengeance against Khan, the Klingons, and who knew who else, all while innocent bystanders were killed or injured. The news was still replete with updates even two days later as the devastation was slowly being cleaned up and that area of San Francisco underwent the initial stages of rebuilding.

The apartment complex that Sadara lived in had mercifully been spared the carnage. She had been at her other home in Santa Fe, NM when those events unfolded, but had returned to their apartment shortly after hearing about it. The young woman wasn't sure if she could have endured losing all of Pike's belongings so soon after losing him. Still, it was a grizzly sight out her window and her heart hurt for those who had lost loved ones.

A gentle knock at the door drew her out of her reverie and she turned to see Kathy rise from the couch and move to answer it. Kathy had remained at Sadara's side throughout the last few days and Sadara had been thankful for the company. She had been a big help in keeping Sadara positive.

Quietly pulling the door open, Kathy's green eyes lit up with surprise. "Commander Spock, come in."

The Enterprise's first officer entered with a small box tucked under his right arm. "Forgive the intrusion. I… felt the need to ascertain your well being and inquire if you need any assistance. Also, I took the liberty of recovering Admiral Pike's belongings from his office. I assumed you'd want them back."

"Thank you, Commander Spock. I am as well as I can be all things considered."

Kathy took the box and set it down on the dining room table as Spock clasped his hands behind his back in that serene manner he had. "I also came to request a favor."

"If I can. What can I help you with?"

"Captain Kirk would wish to attend Admiral Pike's memorial service, but our intrepid Dr. McCoy has informed me that it could be two weeks before he is well enough to do so. Would you be willing to wait such a time?"

Sadara nodded. "Of course, Mr. Spock. I can certainly do that."

Spock looked about to say something else, but he stopped himself and simply raised an eyebrow. In his mind meld with Pike as the admiral lay dying, Spock felt and saw things in the human's mind that he felt his widow deserved to know; things that might help bring her closure, but before making the offer he needed advice first. And that meant another call to New Vulcan.

"Thank you, ladies," he nodded, then departed.

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Calling up his older/alternate universe self was getting to be a habit, Spock reflected as he tried to reach the older Spock via subspace. He had returned to his quarters aboard the Enterprise and was sitting at his comm terminal with a mug of hot Vulcan tea. After a few moments, the wizened elder Vulcan's face appeared on his screen and greeted him.

"Please forgive my disturbing you, but I am faced with a situation that I am uncertain as to the wiser choice. Admiral Pike was killed by Khan and just moments before his passing, I melded with him. He left behind a wife and unborn child and I am uncertain if sharing his last thoughts with her would be comforting or harmful."

A small sigh escaped the elder Spock and his warm brown eyes held sadness. In the timeline he came from, he had held much respect for Captain Christopher Pike; so much so that Spock had risked his career to help his severely crippled former captain. That Captain Pike had a slightly happier ending to his story than the murdered version in this timeline.

"I know of his marriage to Cadet Lochlan. It is regrettable that tragedy has also struck her so young in this timeline. I have not met her in this timeline so I do not know how similar she is to the Sadara Lochlan I knew. What I can tell you is that a mind meld such as the one you're proposing brought me a great deal of comfort after my father's passing. If she is anything like the Sadara I knew, she would find the sharing to be of great comfort."

The younger Spock pondered that a moment. "I probably shouldn't ask you this, but what was she like? The Sadara you knew?"

"Ambitious, insightful, adventurous; and prone to impulsive decisions based on emotion. She heavily favored her human half. Admittedly, I was not very accepting of her when I first met her."

"I can't say I've experienced any particularly animosity toward her. She simply chose a different way of life. What changed your mind?" Spock said, his brows knitting together in confusion.

"Some commonalities, time, and my best friend cared for her deeply."

"Jim Kirk," Spock confirmed, almost unable to believe it."

"Under no circumstances are you to share with him what I'm telling you now, but he eventually married her and they had a family of their own. Until I was brought here, I still maintained regular contact with their adult children. She had never met Captain Pike in my timeline."

That caused Spock's eyebrows to hit his bangs, but he nodded, giving the matter some more thought. "Thank you. I will consider your advice."

The two Spocks cut the connection, leaving the younger Spock to ponder his next move. The information from his elder counterpart had made the decision somewhat easier. What Spock wasn't certain of now was an appropriate time.

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About three weeks later, Sadara and Kathleen returned to Sadara's apartment following the memorial service for Admiral Christopher Pike. In her arms, the young widow carried the perfectly folded flag of the United Federation of Planets and set it down next to a triangular glass flag case that was waiting on the dining room table. Spock had bought the glass case for Sadara as opposed to adding to the collection of sympathy bouquets accumulating around the apartment. It made sense coming from a Vulcan of course. The flag case was far more practical than a floral arrangement that wouldn't last more than a week.

The memorial service had brought fresh tears to Sadara's sapphire eyes, but after three weeks since Pike's death, she was finally starting to reach a point where the constant crying had lessened. It was still taking time for her to get used to her husband not being there. It had been amazing how much she had become used to his daily routine. It still felt surreal to wake up alone in their bed and some mornings it still took her a moment to process the reality of the situation. As Sadara carefully placed the folded flag into the glass case, she wondered if now that the memorial service was over, that surreal feeling would finally abate.

Lifting the glass case, she cradled it gently in her arms and walked over to the fireplace to place the flag on the mantle. She gazed at it for a long moment reflecting on how much Pike had loved just sitting on the couch in front of the fireplace. On more than one occasion, their cuddling in front of the fireplace had led to lovemaking which were now bittersweet memories for Sadara. She gazed down at her wedding ring and touched it gently. The diamonds glittered in the firelight; and having had it for just two months, the ring had still not lost that brand new luster. The white gold was still perfectly polished. For a moment she wondered if it was time to take it off and put it in her jewelry box along with Pike's, but she couldn't bring herself to do that just yet. It still felt too soon and she needed time before she'd be able to open up to anyone new.

Entering into a new relationship was something she had pondered curiously. It still felt too early to think of such things, but the brunette knew that at some point the time would come for her to move on. The Vulcan part of her recoiled protectively from the possibility as if it would be illogical to allow herself to be so vulnerable again. Her human half knew that eventually she would wish for companionship once more. But she'd be a woman with a young child at that point; and that meant that the playing field would be narrowed some. Not all men were game to take on another's man's child. Perhaps that was for the best though as it would weed out most of the guys who weren't serious.

Sadara shook her head sternly to banish those thoughts. It irritated her that her focus had already turned so fully to the unpredictable variables of her future. She blamed her practical Vulcan half for that while her human half lingered behind in bittersweet memory. There was no way to predict how long Pike would have lived had he not been murdered, but Sadara had anticipated at least twenty years of marriage, hopefully more than that.

Not wishing to fall behind, Sadara had gutted out the last three weeks of school; and had managed to endure her classes with composure despite the prying and sympathetic eyes of her instructors and classmates. One of the most difficult aspects of the entire experience of the last three weeks was her OB appointments. For couples joyously anticipating the arrival of a child, obstetric appointments were filled with excitement. Where it hadn't felt that way before, the waiting room now had that ominous foreboding one felt when entering into a potentially awkward situation. Humans came from all kinds of cultures and upbringings. What was considered rude and unacceptable to one human might be considered perfectly fine by another. And humans were known for trying to initiate small talk in places like waiting rooms.

One woman the week before last asked the young hybrid where her husband was. Sadara realized the woman was simply trying to make conversation, erroneously assuming that his status was something harmless like he was on his way or was unable to get away from work this time. Even though Sadara felt that it was none of this woman's business, she didn't want to embarrass the lady so she simply replied that he was unable to make it. It was sufficiently vague, but seemed enough to satisfy her or she got the hint that it wasn't any of her business.

Part of Sadara wondered if perhaps the harsh truth was still better. She wasn't fishing for sympathy or attention by any means, but she wondered how many of these same women she might see in this very waiting room in the near future waiting for their next appointments. She'd still be sitting there alone, her husband still unable to make it. Perhaps it didn't matter, but part of her did feel self conscious sitting there, wondering if they were silently speculating if she even knew who her baby's father was or if she'd been abandoned by him. She tried to remind herself that it didn't matter what other people thought, but she was fiercely protective of her late husband's memory and was at the moment sensitive about others speculating untrue things about him.

Still those types of worries paled in comparison to the fact that her baby would be growing up without a father. And no place on Earth drove that fact home more harshly than sitting in that damned waiting room without Pike. Kathy had offered to try and be excused from classes so Sadara would have some company, but Sadara felt she'd done so much as it was that she couldn't ask her best friend to risk falling behind for doctor's appointments. Sadara was just going to have get used to going to these types of activities alone.

Her heart hurt mostly for her coming son or daughter. She herself had lost her father, Brian at a very young age; she knew the pain of explaining to friends and peers why her father never came to school functions, why he missed out on every important event of her life. She couldn't believe her baby was going to have to grow up that way as well. And worse, he or she would have absolutely no memories of Pike. Sadara at least had her father the first six years of her life.

"Sadara?" Kathy's voice was laced with concern and curiosity. "Are you okay?"

Sadara shook her head. "I'm sorry. Just lost in my thoughts. Let's order takeout. I don't feel like cooking tonight."

"Sounds good to me. I don't feel like cooking either. How does Chinese sound?" Kathy sat down at the comm unit and proceeded to look up the nearest Chinese restaurant that delivered.

The door chime chirped as Sadara was pouring drinks for the both of them. "I'll get it. Sometimes I think I should have that door changed out into a revolving door as often as I have visitors these days."

She chuckled and made her way to the door, pulling it open for her visitor. "Captain Kirk, Commander Spock, this is a surprise! Come in. We're about to order Chinese food. Would you care to stay for supper?"

Spock's mouth opened, about to decline and suggest they return at a more convenient time, but Kirk beat him to it, deciding to accept and see if they could bring the two ladies some cheer. Spock sighed in resignation and followed Kirk in.

"Kathy has the menu up on the screen if you need to look at it," she inclined her head at her redheaded best friend and returned to the kitchen to finish pouring drinks, bringing them out for everyone. Kirk drifted over to Kathy's position and peered at the menu, picking something out for him as well as something suitable for Spock.

Spock took his glass and decided to get down to business, pulling Sadara aside in the spare bedroom. "It was not our intention to interrupt your meal, but I do require a few moments of your time. I… mind melded with Admiral Pike moments before his passing. If you are interested, I would be willing to share the experience with you whenever you are ready."

Sadara knew that mind melds were deeply personal. She had only been involved in a few mind melds with her mother and grandfather; never with someone not of her own family. She was deeply grateful that Spock was willing to share such a private experience with her. She had no idea what he had seen in Pike's mind, but she was certain if there was no chance she would get peace from the experience, Spock would not have offered. She was confident she would gain much from allowing the meld.

"I would appreciate that, Spock. Thank you. Perhaps after the evening meal?"

"That would be acceptable," Spock nodded and they returned to the living room to await delivery of their supper.

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The conversation over dinner had been pleasant enough. Kathy had been rather surprised that Sadara had welcomed the company as eagerly as she had, but she couldn't deny that Kirk and Spock had been a welcome distraction from the horrors of the last three weeks. Despite the elephant in the room, not one of them chose to embrace the dismal, but obvious topics of the attack at Daystrom and the crash landing of the USS Vengeance. Spock was particularly puzzled by the lack of attention those topics were receiving at the dinner table though from what he knew of humans such avoidance was often normal. Instead they chatted about recent movies seen, favorite restaurants, and other "get to know you" topics. Small talk wasn't exactly Spock's forte so he remained mostly silent as they ate. As a result, he was the first one finished eating and simply sat quietly as the others continued chatting.

Glancing over at Spock, Sadara noted that he appeared ready to get the evening moving along and she rose to gather the empty plates and set them in the sink for washing later. Kathy joined her in the kitchen, gently placing a hand on her close friend's arm to let her know that she'd clean up while Sadara and Spock went about the business of the mind meld.

Nodding silently, Sadara glanced up at Spock again who had retreated to the living room near the doorway to the spare bedroom, arms clasped behind his back. Despite the relaxed pose, he appeared rather tense. The brunette hybrid couldn't blame him as she was rather nervous as well. She'd experienced mind melds before, but never anything on this scale. Tonight she'd learn about, even to some extent experience her late husband's final moments. Her throat constricted and she swallowed hard as her heart thumped nervously against her ribs. All at once she felt impatient for the meld and yet apprehensive. She couldn't even begin to speculate how this meld would affect her and once done she would have to live with whatever those effects were.

Leading the way into the spare bedroom for the second time that evening, Sadara lowered herself gently to sit on the edge of the queen size bed. In the corner of the room near the closet Pike's electric guitars were propped up. Music had been a mutual love of theirs and they both played, though Sadara enjoyed singing a little bit more. Memories of quiet weekends together in this very room playing their guitars came unbidden, but she turned her focus to quieting her mind in preparation for the meld. Fortunately the clinking of dishes being washed in the kitchen was muffled enough that Sadara and Spock weren't disturbed by the noise despite their superior Vulcan hearing. They could just make out the hushed voices of their friends in the background.

After a long moment, Spock joined Sadara on the edge of the bed. The added weight depressed the mattress slightly and Sadara adjusted her position to get comfortable again. Vulcan/Human hybrid regarded Vulcan/Human hybrid. Spock's warm brown eyes held compassion and concern, relaxing Sadara somewhat. She knew she could trust him not to hurt her and she let out the deep breath she'd barely realized she'd been holding.

Long fingers searched out the meld points on Sadara's ivory face. The young male's right eyebrow lifted slightly as he took in her facial features as if for the first time. The upswept eyebrows and the delicately pointed ears marked her as part Vulcan, but her coloring was more reminiscent of his own mother's race. Her large blue eyes, though not unheard of among Vulcans, were the deep blue of sapphires; and her dark brown hair was unusually curly for a Vulcan as well. She lacked the desert hued, exotic beauty of a Vulcan woman, though she wasn't unattractive.

Shifting his focus away from the physical, Spock isolated his memories from the meld he'd shared with the late Admiral Pike. The experience coalesced into perfect, stark clarity once again and Spock lowered his mental shields so that Sadara could experience the thoughts, feelings, and images from her husband's last moments.

Sadara's dark eyebrows furrowed as she experienced Pike's difficulty breathing; the deep, labored breaths becoming increasingly futile gasps for air. Panic threatened to take over his entire being as it became ever more difficult to breathe and the realization that he was dying took hold. He fought for calm, but it eluded him as anger, fear, and sadness overwhelmed him.

The dying admiral had encouraged his young wife to be strong earlier that night, but could never have imagined that she would have to face this. At least not already. He would never see Sadara again. And he'd never see his son or daughter ever. That thought was the most damning and upsetting of all. He'd waited until he was finished captaining starships to start a family and now he'd die in Starfleet HQ before his firstborn even joined the world. Remorse, guilt, and anger filled him along with worry for his young wife. The last thing he'd ever wanted was to abandon her with a young child or leave that child without a father; and fury filled him for the man who had done this to his family. The longtime Starfleet officer continued fighting for air and just barely noted the surprise widening Spock's deep brown eyes as Spock registered the uncharacteristic fury welling up in his commanding officer.

As Pike stared at Spock he could feel the calm and comfort that the young Vulcan man was projecting. The admiral was grateful for the Vulcan's consideration and he tried to put his final moments to good use, focusing on what he wanted for his wife and their coming baby instead of the unproductive anger he'd been feeling. He knew that he could count on Spock to at least deliver a message, if not try to do more if possible so Pike focused on wanting Sadara to move on soon and find someone new; someone she loved and would love her and who would be happy to be a father to another man's child.

His eyesight fading, Pike could no longer focus on Spock's face. The last thing he felt as the darkness claimed him was the single tear tracking down his cheek.

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Sadara gasped as Spock's hand lifted from her now tear stained cheeks. Until that moment, she hadn't realized she'd been crying, but mind melds could be extremely absorbing to the exclusion of external stimuli. The spots where Spock's warm fingers had been were now cold. Spock regarded her silently with concern.

"I wish he hadn't felt so much guilt. None of this was his fault," she murmured softly.

Spock's eyebrow lifted once more. "I have noted that it appears to be a human characteristic to experience unwarranted emotions. I concur that Admiral Pike's guilt was unnecessary though it does not change the fact that that was what he felt. As you just learned, his most pressing concern was for you and your child. I understand that healing will require time; however, I encourage you to attempt to honor his last wishes and move on. Lingering in the past and over his death will not allow either one of you to be free."

Sadara pondered his words for a moment. "Vulcans have katras, Spock. I'm not certain humans experience anything save for oblivion after death. It does pain me to say that."

"Perhaps humans do not have katras; however it is possible that there is some form of life after death for them as well. In any event, you and your son or daughter are still among the living and at the very least, you should move on for your sakes."

"I understand," Sadara nodded.

She and Spock regarded each other for a long moment, both still pondering Pike's last wishes.