Chapter ten – Wonder
Hermione did not tell anyone of her newfound source of happiness as she was trying to come to terms with it herself. It had come so out of the blue, there he was in all his vulnerability and she realized how she really felt. Was it something that had always been there, an underlying tension both emotional and sexual that had existed since the day they met? A magnetism that just drove them together through all the fighting until there was no anger left, no hate, no misery just love. And as she marvelled at the way they had come together finally she found herself smiling to herself when she walked the halls receiving odd stares from everyone around her. They all believed that she was truly insane. The change in Hermione Granger had been noticed and people began spreading rumours that she was on drugs and such. Questions were asked yet no answers were given.
By the time of the NEWTs exams the hot gossip of Hermione Granger returning to her old busy self had died down. Hermione smiled more and she liked it. As she sat down to her first exam she felt confident and ready to go until…
"Miss Granger, may I please steal Miss Granger it is a matter of urgency," Professor McGonagall called loudly from the back of the Great Hall. All the Arithmacy students turned from McGonagall to Hermione wondering what was wrong. Hermione shook her head and quickly made her way out of the hall. Instantly she began to worry that something was wrong with Draco.
"Professor what is wrong?" she asked quickly as they began walking to the headmistresses office.
"You have been called into London, it appears Miss Weasley is in labour and demands you by her side," McGonagall said with a hint of disapproval. Hermione beamed. Ginny was having her baby and asked for Hermione to be there. After all the drama and angst that had surrounded Hermione the past few months she was surprised that Ginny or any of the Weasley's would want her anywhere near them.
"Quickly Miss Granger, you are to travel by Floo that has been set up especially for this occasion," McGonagall said inviting Hermione into the ornate fireplace. Hermione could not stop grinning, "Tell Miss Weasley the school sends her our best wishes," McGonagall added with a warm smile on her worn face.
"I will," Hermione said and in a flash of green she was gone. The sensation of whizzing through the Floo Network and the excitement creating butterflies in Hermione's stomach was almost too much to handle. She cried out in joy as she flew past fireplace after fireplace. When she got to the hospital she instantly saw the crowd of red hair pacing up and down in the waiting room. Stepping out of the fireplace Ron was the first one to notice her, she saw the look of resentment on his face and she knew she should be disappointed in him yet her excitement could not be contained and she ran over and embraced him.
"Hermione…wha…wha…?" He was stumped for words she just smiled at him.
"Shhh. We have both been boneheads this year," she said giggling at her choice of words, "Today is for Ginny," and with that she ran around the room and embraced all those she knew; the entire Weasley clan, including Fleur, and a few add ons – Remus and Tonks (her own pregnant belly protruding). Suddenly Molly Weasley opened the doors a worried look on her face. Everyone ran forward in anticipation.
"It Hermione here? Come on dear you are needed immediately," she said frantically Hermione did as she was told.
"Is there any news?" Arthur asked quickly. Molly gravely shook her head and dragged Hermione deep into the maternity ward.
"Mrs. Weasley, what's happened?" Hermione asked suddenly worried.
"The baby is early and there are some complications," Molly said rushing through the linoleum corridors. Hermione had to jog slightly to keep her pace.
"What do you mean? How early? I thought she was due in late June that is what the test said when we got it done," Hermione said worried.
"Well they were wrong," Molly simply said.
"But that doesn't make sense how could they be wrong, it was an ultrasound, and didn't she have ones after that to – " Hermione started but was cut off as they came to the operating room door.
"They were done by muggles, clearly they were wrong, she is two months premature and terrified," Molly said dangerously low, Hermione didn't even dare retort yet was cleaned up and thrown into the chaotic world of the operating theatre.
Some hours later Hermione sat by Ginny's bed with Ron, saying nothing just waiting for her to wake. A caesarean had been successfully administered and a little baby boy was born yet he was in intensive care and would be for some time. The tiny little boy had breathing problems, one of his lungs on the verge of collapsing. Hermione had seen him come out all covered in blood, he was the smallest thing she had ever seen in her life not much bigger than her two hands put together. How she wished she could do something but she was powerless in this world.
Ginny woke with a start and looked frantically around the room despite being drowsy. Hermione and Ron leaped up to her and took her hands as she began to sob.
"Where is my baby? Where is he?" she cried. Hermione squeezed on the bed beside her and cradled Ginny in her arms.
"The doctors are looking after him Ginny, he is having problems breathing. But they say he should be ok. They are running other tests to make sure he is all ok that nothing else is wrong," Ron said soothingly. Yet Ginny continued to weep wanting to see her child.
"Why isn't Harry here, he should be here going through this with me," Ginny said angrily pushing Hermione away, "Its his baby he should be here making sure my son is ok!" she cried Ron and Hermione almost tackled her in two massive hugs trying to subdue her as she continued to call out that she wanted to see her baby, and cursing Harry for his absence.
After Ginny had calmed down and fallen back asleep Hermione went and stood at the window of the intensive care unit and saw the tiny little boy tubes coming out of him in such an unnatural way. It was such a sorrowful sight to see that tiny baby holding on for dear life. She could already see the tiny black hairs sprouting from his head. The little tag on his little box read, James. She smiled Harry would have liked that.
"Look it's a baby in a box," Remus said half-heartedly coming to stand beside her. She looked at him slightly put off by the fact that he was joking about a baby who was essentially on life support.
"Remus, it isn't funny," she said quietly.
"I know Hermione, but it is true," he said not looking at her, "You know he is like a little gift, James the baby in a box. Don't worry, he will be ok, I know," Remus added.
"I hope so, he is the most beautiful thing I have seen, look at his little toes it is hard to believe something so small and precious could ever exist," Hermione said wistfully.
"Life is a gift, and I think most of us take it for granted," Remus said looking down and the eighteen year old. She felt a sudden pang of guilt realizing how ridiculous she had been all year. There was a long pause as they watched the nurse change the infant's sheets.
"I am guessing you haven't read the letter yet," Remus said. Hermione didn't respond yet imagined the yellowing envelope crumpled and tear stained sitting in her little china box stuffed at the bottom of her trunk. She hadn't even thought of it recently, it was remarkable about how a thing so small caused her such grief, when really it was the ticket to setting her free.
"It is little wonder's like these that make me thankful to be alive" Hermione said taking a long look at little James and turned away from Remus.
When she finally returned to Hogwarts Hermione faced the thing she feared the most and was surprised at how small a thing it was, to read a letter.
Dear Hermione.
You, Ron and Ginny are the world to me that is why I have to do this. I have to protect you, please forgive me.
You are the most brilliant, interesting, loyal, amazing friend I could have ever asked for. You taught me everything I know, without you I would be able to do this.
I want you to keep living all over you, keep going for me work through it all because at the end of the day I am always with you. Please don't do anything stupid but move forward, not backwards and remember me.
Remember those days that Ron and I would beg for you to do our homework, those times we had at the Burrow, those days the four of us would wander through the school stealing moments we never should have had. Remember the good times, because you know I take you with me, so take me with you.
Go and live Hermione, make sure Ron doesn't make a git of himself and make sure Ginny is happy. And make sure you are happy and never forget that I love you and you were one of those amazing things that make life worth living.
I love you forever and always,
Harry
"Looks like you figured everything out all by yourself," Eirene said smoothly in her handsome warm voice close to Hermione's ear. Looking up startled Hermione saw the woman sitting at the end of the bed glowing in the dark room. Hermione had lost track of how long she had been there reading the letter over and over tears smudging the ink. She rubbed her eyes at the change of focus and realised how tired she was.
"What are you doing here? Why did you never come back?" Hermione whispered slightly frustrated with the goddess who bowed her head in shame.
"I am sorry, I kinda got in trouble with my sisters, they told me I shouldn't meddle with your future. But as it turns out you found your way back, took a little longer than I would have liked but you are alive and well, congratulations," she said smiling. Hermione was too tired to question her. "You deserve to be happy Hermione, and remember no matter what happens in life you can always find your way back to happiness," she added placing one soft hand on Hermione's. They smiled at each other and Hermione realised it was going to be ok.
"I think I can finally let him go now," she said folding up the letter. Eirene nodded.
"I think you can too,"
ANRa ra ok 2 chapters left I think almost over I want to finish a story for once. Sorry it has gotten so shit, slight writers block and in any case I have another life which involves lots of drinking, smoking and staying out all night!