Disclaimer: Nothing belongs to me...except The Body Swap Experience and Chinolilia. :D
Ok, this chapter is completely bonkers...well I think so anyway. I hope you enjoy. And thank you to all the reviews so far! You're all so kind and just generally fantastic! :)
Chapter Ten:
"I know I've said it before," Donna muttered to the Doctor as they followed the others to the boardroom for discussion, "But, really why does it always have to be the good looking ones."
"Sorry?" The Doctor was oblivious and out of it, as always in situations like this.
"Jack and Ianto!" she whispered back. She would have nodded pointedly at the pair, but had already forgotten which bodies they were in.
"Oh." the Doctor said, tugging on his earlobe, "Well, I don't think you should worry."
"Why? Is he bi?" Donna asked, her voice hopeful. "Jack, I mean."
"What?" he replied, shocked, "Ah, well," he regained his composure, "Jack's more..." he paused to think of the correct word, "Pansexual...omnisexual..."
"Omnisexual?" Donna's eyes widened.
"I'll explain later." he muttered, as they came through the boardroom door.
"Right..." Donna trailed off and sat beside the Doctor at one end of the large table.
Ianto handed around coffees a moment later and the discussion of the situation began.
"So, what's the plan, Doc?" Jack asked, placing Owen's hands on the table.
"Come on, Jack," the Doctor sipped his coffee, "Ooh, nice coffee, Ianto. Just what I needed, thank you!" he smiled at the body of Jack, deciding not to admit he actually preferred tea.
Donna rolled her eyes and shook her head. How was it possible for him to remember everyone?
"Sorry, where was I?" the Doctor turned back to Jack, "Oh yes, that's right. As I recall, Jack, you're plans were always the best. Why are you asking me?"
Jack nodded, in agreement. "I'm asking you, because you're better at this alien stuff that I am."
Tosh, Gwen, Owen and Ianto all gasped in shock. They'd never met anyone, as yet, who could get Jack to admit to something like that, let along admit anything. Ianto was considering taking down notes. Getting Jack to admit something could prove a handy skill...
The Doctor smiled. "Right, well if I'm going to be on any help, you'll have to tell me exactly what happened."
Donna and the Doctor sat back and listened for about 5 minutes as all four members of Torchwood, Jack and Martha explain what had happened and how.
"And then Martha suggested we call you, so we did, and here we are." Jack finished.
The Doctor nodded, thoughtfully.
"So is there any chance you can reverse it?" Gwen asked, desperately.
"Not sure."
"Do you know if this Chinolilia place makes something to put us back in our own bodies?" Owen asked.
"I can't remember," the Doctor admitted, "It's been a while since I went there. Although I may have a catalogue in the TARDIS."
"A catalogue?" Tosh exclaimed.
"Yup. Just like you get in department stores." he grinned and heard Jack chuckle, most likely at his colleagues expressions. "But it would be a bit out of date now. Do you know what year this model of the Body Swap Experience was made in?"
"Model?" Gwen mouthed to Jack, before shaking her head at the incredulousness of it.
"Uh... not sure." Ianto said, "The actual sphere was destroyed and we saw no other inscriptions on it, beside the name and place of production."
"But we didn't give a thorough looking over using microscope equipment." Tosh said, "We easily could have missed something."
"We didn't think it was of any danger, so we didn't bother." Ianto admitted.
"Why don't you just look or do a scan or whatever on the broken pieces?" Donna suggested. "You might find some more information on the pieces."
"Good idea," the Doctor agreed, looked around at the Torchwood team to see if it was possible.
Owen was shaking Gwen's head. "Nah, the sphere shattered into too small pieces. There'd be no way of reading anything."
"Oh."
"Can you get me the fragments of the sphere?" the Doctor asked.
"I put them down in the archives, yesterday," Ianto said, "But I can easily retrieve them for you."
"Good man." the Doctor nodded as the young Welshman immediately left the room to retrieve them.
When Ianto returned a few minutes later, the Doctor eagerly took the fragments and took out his sonic screwdriver to examine them.
"Hmm," he muttered to himself; the blue light from the screwdriver flashing around the room. "Definitely Chinolilian and not a copy, which is good. Material looks like..." he paused and licked the largest of the pieces and shuddered. "Ok, material definitely copper based. Could be traces of..."
"Try not to listen too carefully," Donna recommended to the Torchwood team, who were looking rather shocked at the Doctor, "Most of it's just gobbledegook."
"It's best to just nod, when he stops for breath." Martha added, smiling to herself as though enjoying an inside joke.
"Ok." Gwen said, tearing her eyes away from the Doctor who was now sniffing a large piece of the broken sphere.
They sat in silence, the Doctor muttering away as he prodded the pieces with his sonic screwdriver. Tosh reminded herself to ask him about it, if she got the chance. If not, she'd definitely ask Jack. Surely he'd know a thing or two about the sonic device the Doctor was using.
"Ah ha!" the Doctor exclaimed and Gwen nearly jumped in fright.
"The perfect symmetry of it and it's electromagnetic field level means it's a Model K52 Orb, possible the Zero Gravity version."
"You what?" Owen asked, making it clear he thought the Doctor was talking complete crap.
"Of course, these babies are usually only meant for the Body Swap of two beings. It only extended itself to all of you guys, because of the confined space you're in here. Plus if it is the Zero Gravity version, the obvious Gravity here, would have increased its power."
"So you can reverse it, then?" Jack asked, ignoring the fact that the remainder of his team had their mouths gaping open so wide you could fly a plane through the gap.
"Easily. You normally buy these in pairs. One Body Swap Experience and one Anti Body Swap, to reverse it."
"So, only the Body Swap Experience part came through the Rift?" Martha said.
"Yup. All I have to do is go and buy the Anti Body Swap, and you'll all be back to normal." the Doctor grinned around at the Torchwood team, who all struggled to quickly close their mouths.
"Thank you, Doctor." Ianto finally managed to say and the rest murmured their thanks after him.
"Anytime." the Doctor grinned cheerfully. "So, we'll be off." He and Donna stood up and lead the way over to the cog door.
"You'll come back soon?" Gwen asked.
"He has a time machine," Owen said, "He'll be back in ten seconds."
"Sure will." the Doctor replied. "See you all then, so we don't bother with long goodbyes. And don't worry, we can find our own way out." He waved cheerily goodbye and stepped through the cog door.
"Bye!" Donna said, following the Doctor. The six remaining people watched as the cog door rolled closed and the Doctor and Donna disappeared from view.
Jack sighed and at that exact moment the Rift monitor went off.