Authors Note

Thank you for all the reviews ^-^

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the vampire academy or bloodlines series characters. They all belongs to Richelle Mead.

Chapter 8

I opened my eyes, but I couldn't see anything.

My breathing quickened in fear. I started touching the ground with my hands, and I found that it was hard, cold and familiar.

I also felt a familiar pain in my arms, and when I touched the painful places with my hands, there was something warm and sticky on them.

Blood.

Desperately trying to calm myself, I tried to get up, but as soon as I did it, a dizzy feeling overcame my whole body and I was forced to sit back down.

And then I suddenly realized it.

I was… I was back there, in the dark, in the pain and the coldness. Was the whole rescuing just a dream? Was I here the whole time? Did I imagine everything – Adrian, Abe, blue sky, shower, food? Was my mind just torturing me further?

Or was I so high from the bite that I ended up in a different universe in my head?

"No, no, no," I couldn't stop myself from frantically saying. "This can't be true."

And then the opening door proved quite the opposite.

"Ready for today's game, sweetheart?" the familiar voice said.

I hated the blonde, blue-eyed Strigoi. Mostly because he was so tall, and so strong. He had to be old at least a few centuries.

"No," I sobbed. Tears were already streaming down my face and I backed away, into the farthest corner of the room, wrapping my arms around myself.

This wasn't fair. I was finally going crazy, I was finally losing my mind, and perhaps it was a good thing. I'd never get out of this room, anyway, so would it be better if I spent my remaining time in that dream?

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, an image of Adrian appearing in my mind. It managed to calm me, because he was so harmless, so honest, and so, so beautiful… Did I imagine him, too? Or was he a real person? I'd never know.

My thoughts were shattered by the cold, playful voice of the Strigoi. "No? I thought we were already done with playing that game, honey."

I knew what was coming next, so I again imagined I was with Adrian in that field. We were running and I could feel the sun on my skin-

"You say 'No,'" the Strigoi continued, his voice too close, "And then I do this…"

His hands were suddenly on my upper arms, forcing me to get up, violently shaking me. I tried to struggle, but his palm connected with my face, and I cried out in pain.

You're in the field with Adrian, I repeated to myself. You can see the blue sky and feel the wind on your face-

"And then I do this…" the Strigoi continued, shoving me against the wall.

This was also a part of the routine. I shook my head wildly, desperately trying to get away, but I was trapped behind the Strigoi's body and the wall. My back was already hurting, and he had a death grip on my arms, so I knew there was no escape.

"No," I whispered, hating the part of me which was excited.

The Sydney I know was disgusted by the idea alone, and I know she's in there somewhere, Adrian's voice echoed in my mind. If she was in here somewhere, then why did my heart start beating faster? And why was I so excited?

"Stop struggling, baby," the Strigoi said in a sweet voice. I could feel his breath on my neck, but I still tried to get away. "You know you want it."

Then I felt his fangs pierce my skin and I screamed and screamed as loud as I could-

"Sydney!" I heard a different, but still familiar, voice say. "Sydney, wake up!"

I could still feel the hard, cold wall behind my back, and the pain in my neck…

"Breathe," the voice said again. "Just breathe slowly. In and out."

I tried to do what the voice said, but I was still gasping for air. After a few seconds of listening to the soothing sound, though, my breathing finally normalized itself.

"That's it," the voice said gently, and the pain slowly disappeared as a new feeling started overwhelming me.

Someone was gently touching my left cheek with his fingers, and I liked the feeling of those fingers on my face, no matter who they belonged to. It calmed me.

"Now try to slowly open your eyes," the voice gently said. How could I not comply?

My lids were heavy, but I slowly started to lift them. Everything was blurry, and my eyes felt strange, but I could see a silhouette in front of me.

"Adrian," I whispered instinctually. It was the first thought in my mind.

Emerald eyes came into focus. "It's okay," he whispered back, still gently moving his fingers on my cheek. "It was just a dream, and now you're awake."

My vision was still blurry, and I tried to lift my hands to clean whatever was in my eyes, but a gentle pain stopped me from doing it.

"Don't try to move," Adrian said gently, his eyes full of worry and uncertainty. "You might move the tubes if you try to."

"Tubes?" I echoed, furrowing my eyebrows in confusion. If only I could see properly… "Adrian, what's wrong with my eyes?"

"Oh," he answered immediately. "That. You've been crying and I guess the light's not helping either… just wait for a second. And don't move, please."

I still had no idea what tubes he was referring to, so I tried to move my arms again, and the pain was there again. Was I still attached to IVs?

That revelation proved to be shocking for me. Was my state that bad? Perhaps Abe wasn't exaggerating, after all.

After a few seconds, Adrian turned off the light and I could actually see in front of me.

And after a few more seconds, I felt him sit down on the bed, next to me. He put his hand under my chin and raised it so that I was looking at him. Then he started pulling something over my eyes…

And then his face finally came to focus, in all its glory. I still remembered the dream, and all the thoughts that ran through my head. Including the one where I thought that Adrian was handsome.

His eyebrows were lowered in focus, and he kept cleaning my face from the tears. "Your eyes will probably feel a bit strange for a few more minutes," he said casually. "You've been asleep for a day, after all."

I nodded, and said, "Thank you," after he was done.

I expected him to move away from the bed, but he just sat there, not as close to me as my body would like him to be, but close enough.

He looked at me with a serious look. "What were you dreaming?" he asked gently.

I averted my gaze to my arms and, just as I feared, tubes and needles were in my arms. I noticed that the scars weren't so fresh anymore, which was a good thing.

"You can tell me, Sydney," Adrian said when he realized I wasn't going to answer his question. "Your screams woke me up. If I'd been awake, I would've noticed it in your aura and woke you up in time, but…"

"Why were you sleeping here?" I asked in a near-whisper. The room had yellow walls, which managed to make me smile. After years spent in a black room, this change seemed like the best one.

"Abe said you asked for me to be here when you woke up," Adrian said in an uncertain voice. "Did you?"

I nodded. "I don't know why, but… your presence calms me. Without you here, these needles would be on the floor, I'd cut myself with something and just like Abe said, I'd eventually die."

"He said you'd die?" Adrian asked in disbelief. "You know I'd never allow for something like that to happen. After failing you four years ago, I'd never fail you again."

I finally found the courage to turn towards the fire in his eyes. He was breathing hard, and I suddenly had the urge to touch him.

I tried to ignore it. "Thank you," was the only rational response I was able to give.

He smiled. "You could thank my by telling me about your dream," he said, raising an eyebrow.

And that was it. My body had a mind of its own, and my face was suddenly in his chest, his arms were around me and after a moment, his muscles relaxed and he started pulling his fingers through my hair. My arms hurt from moving, I was probably going to rip the tubes from my body, but I didn't care. I needed to be in his embrace. I needed to feel safe. And he didn't react, anyway, so it meant I wasn't going to bleed to death. I simply closed my eyes and forgot about everything.

"I was back there," I whispered after a few moments, knowing he could hear me. "I was living through it again. I… I thought I was going crazy, and that the rescue was just a dream. And then the Strigoi… he was going to…"

Adrian's arms tightened around me. It was as if he thought that he could protect me from these memories by physically protecting me. A moment later, I realized it was working.

His presence gave me the strength to find my voice. "He was going to bite me. When his fangs pierced my skin, I screamed and… and then I heard you."

"Thank God I woke up," he whispered. "Thank God I managed to pull you out of that dream. If you want me to, I'll pull you into spirit dreams or watch over you every night to prevent the nightmares from happening."

I rolled my eyes and smiled. "Thank you, but you shouldn't do that. You have a life, and you shouldn't waste your time on me. It's just a nightmare, after all and I think I can handle-"

"Watching over you isn't wasting time," he said fiercely. "And even if it was, I'd do it anyway."

I pulled away to look at him. His arms were still around me, and he was so close. God, he was so close, and he was so handsome. I remembered the dream and the way his lips felt on mine. Would it feel the same in reality?

A small part of my brain was telling me he was a vampire, he had fangs, he'd bite me and hurt me, but I'd have to blind and stupid to believe in something like that. Adrian would never hurt me - that much I knew for sure.

I leaned in slowly, needles in my skin the only thing reminding me of reality, and I could feel Adrian's grip on me tighten. His eyes were wide, which made them look even more beautiful, and I lost myself in them. I could feel his breath on my mouth, which meant I needed to lean just a little bit more-

"Did she wake-" somebody suddenly said from the door, and we both suddenly stopped. I couldn't move, I couldn't tear my gaze from Adrian's eyes – all I could do was try to breathe and try to realize what the hell was happening. Why was I so close to him? What was I trying to do? Why was he looking surprised? Why did my heart keep telling me I had to lean in and kiss him already? Why was I a second from actually doing it?

"Is everything okay here?" the voice continued.

Adrian suddenly blinked and shook his head, releasing me. "Yes, everything is fine," he said after clearing his throat. He pulled his hand through his hair, and I realized he was upset.

After a moment, though, I tore my gaze away from him and moved it to the person that interrupted… whatever this was.

Rose Hathaway was standing by the door, her eyebrows raised and her hands on her hips. She was dressed in black, and my eyes immediately focused on the silver stake on her belt. Seeing it calmed me down a bit, but my heart was still beating fast.

"I see Sydney finally woke up," she said, eyeing Adrian strangely. "And I see she still hadn't tried to kill herself."

I flinched after hearing that. Did she really think that low of me? It wasn't that recognition that stung, but the fact that she was right. I said the same to Adrian a few minutes ago, after all.

"You're being an amazing help, Rose," Adrian said in an exasperated voice, "Now do us all a favor and go back to your dear Russian. I'm sure he needs you more than we."

"Are you kidding me?" Rose said, stepping forward. Great, now they were going to do this back and forth until we my brain exploded from it. All I could do was sit back and watch it.

"Sydney's been gone for four years, and now that she's back, you're asking me to go away?" Rose continued. "Remember this, Ivashkov – she doesn't belong only to you. She has other friends, other people who love her, and we'd all like a chance to talk with her. So give me a favor and get out of this room before I knock you out."

It was comical how such a short person could make such a tall man shut up. Adrian turned towards me, but I rolled my eyes and said, "Perhaps it'll help me with my memory."

"If you need me to kick her out of here, just call," he answered. "I'll be right in front."

I nodded, flashed him a reassuring smile, and after a short staring contest with Rose, Adrian left from the room, closing the door behind him.

As soon as he was out, Rose sat down on my bed, flashing me a crazy smile.

"So, you and Adrian, huh?" she said in a sweet voice, and I immediately had the urge to call Adrian.

Explaining what she saw was going to be hard. Not just to her, but to myself, too.

The only thing calming me down was the fact that all my memories of Rose were back, which meant parts of me were slowly returning. I knew there was still a large gap in my mind, and all I could do was hope that Adrian would want to fill it.

But in the meantime, I'd have to face Rose, her grinning face, and her embarrassing questions.