J.K. Rowling owns this universe. I'm just playing in her sandbox.
The next morning, the Great Hall was awash in whispers and rumors at breakfast. The headline on the front page of Lily's Daily Prophet confirmed her worst fears. Halloween night hadn't been quiet everywhere.
MYSTERIOUS ATTACK AT HOGSMEADE VILLAGE LEAVES AURORS BAFFLED
Ministry keeping mum over series of break-ins. Magical Law Enforcement has no comment.
Wordlessly, she stood up and walked to where James sat with his friends. They were laughing about something Sirius had just said. Peter noticed her first. He coughed loudly and shot a significant look at James.
"What's up, Lily?" Peter asked.
James turned around, eyes shining, a lopsided grin in place. She hesitated, knowing that what she was about to show him would wipe that look right off his face. Then she handed him the paper.
The effect was instantaneous. Quickly, he spread the paper out in front of him and began to read.
"I knew it was too good to be true," he muttered, racing to get through the article.
According to the Prophet, a group of masked wizards had attacked three of the businesses on High Street in Hogsmeade in the hours before midnight. No one had been killed, but at least ten people had been taken to St. Mungo's. Four were listed in critical condition.
"Those bastards. I knew it. I just—"
He looked up at Lily, and his heart ached at the frozen, horrified look in her eyes. Without thinking, he stood up and took her into his arms. She sank into him, gripping the back of his robes tightly in both fists. Her face pressed into his chest and she let out a deep, shuddering sigh. He could feel wet, warm pinpricks as her tears sank into his robes. She pulled away too soon, eyes red but dry.
"I'm sorry," he said quietly, not sure what, exactly, he was apologizing for. She shook her head quickly and sniffed.
"No, I'm sorry. Don't know what came over me." She blinked rapidly and cleared her throat. "Anyway, I just thought you should know. I have to go...get my school bag. Left it in the dorm. Right. See you in class."
She hurried away, her arms wrapped tightly across her chest, schoolbag dangling off one shoulder.
Remus, who had taken the Prophet and begun reading the article while James and Lily were talking, looked up. "I'd wager that this is why Dumbledore isn't at breakfast. Ministry probably got him involved first thing, this happening on Hogwarts doorstep and all."
Sirius and Peter crowded around Remus, scanning the article with uncharacteristically solemn expressions on their faces.
James' stomach felt like lead. Why hadn't he bothered to make sure all the Slytherins were accounted for? How many times had he and the boys snuck out to Hogsmeade and made it back without rousing anyone's concerns? He knew better than anyone how easy it could be with the proper planning. And now all those people had been hurt, and some could even die.
And yet.
A small part of him buzzed with the memory of Lily Evans' arms wrapped around him, the subtle, flowery scent of her perfume tickling his nostrils, her cheek on his chest.
:o:o:o:o:o:o:
Lily hurried through the hallways, not quite sure where she was going. Her heart was heavy, weighted down with the knowledge that someone she used to care about could do something so horrible. The irony was too much. James Potter, the boy she had once hated with an unmatched, fiery passion, had been the one to console her when Snape went on a homicidal rampage.
Well, no, not homicidal. Yet.
She wandered in the direction of the office she shared with James, wondering how much he would mind if she took his Cloak out for a spin. The idea of being able to sit somewhere and not be seen or worried over was terribly tempting.
In the end, though, she decided that the quiet of the Library was what she wanted. To sit in the back of the long, silent room surrounded by the smell of old parchment and leather, staring at the ink spots left by students of a hundred wizarding generations... that sounded perfect.
She found her favorite table, nestled behind the wizarding law statute books that were only unearthed once every few decades by particular ambitious upper form students. No one ever went back there, and she could always count on remaining undisturbed for as long as she wanted. Despite the early hour, that corner of the Library was dim and warm. She settled down into her favorite chair and wrapped her robes tighter around herself, thinking that it would have been better if she had just stayed in bed that morning.
A soft creak startled her from sleep some time later. Her head ached dully and her eyes were puffy. She barely had time to register sharp hunger pains in her stomach when a hand slipped over her mouth. She shrieked and struggled, but an arm anchored her against her chair.
"Shhhh, Lily, it's me. Shhh."
At the sound of Snape's voice, she struggled harder, trying to work open her mouth so she could bite his hand. She heard him sigh.
"Fine, have it your way."
Then she was frozen, her eyelids stuck wide open and arms pinned to her sides. He came around into view and sat next to her, wand drawn.
"I just want to talk."
She couldn't respond, but her eyes stayed fixed on the tip of his wand. Maybe there was some kind of nonverbal spell she could do that would undo the body bind curse and allow her to disarm him. Her stomach turned just thinking about what that wand had done in the previous twenty-four hours.
"I warned you, Lily. I warned you! And still you went out. A part of me knew you wouldn't listen. Still, at least Potter was the one who found us. I'm not sure things wouldn't have gone another way if it had been you."
He stared at her pensively, anguish written all over his face.
"Do you know that I rearranged everything for you? I talked them down from the kind of over-the-top childish display they wanted to put on at school. Hogsmeade was my idea. We had to prove ourselves, you see. It had to be big."
There was a desperate edge to his voice, and he reached out to touch her cheek. She wanted to recoil, spit, do anything to show him how disgusting she thought he was. He sighed again.
"I didn't want to, Lily, but some sacrifices have to be made for the greater good. People need to be scared in order to open their eyes to how the world really works. If you would only listen to me, talk to me, I know I could show you..."
Someone shuffled through the shelves nearby, and Snape stopped talking for a moment, just listening. He raised his wand, ready to strike.
Please, don't hurt anyone else, she thought at him. Don't make this worse.
As if he heard her, he turned his sunken, black eyes back to her. Slowly, he dropped his wand arm to his side.
"I didn't want it to be this way," he said again. He stopped, clearly frustrated by how this was going.
"We all make choices, Lily. We do what we have to in order to get the lives we deserve, and sometimes that requires sacrifices. I can still take care of you. I can protect your family from what's coming. Protect you. He'd see, he'd have to, how important you are, how talented. And if He didn't...well, I'd figure something out. I promise, Lily. You may not like our methods. Sometimes I don't like our methods, either. But the world is changing, and you'd be a fool not to know that. I can save you. All you have to do is let me."
He stood up and leaned in close again, cupping her cheek with a cold, clammy hand. "You don't have to give me your answer now. Think about it. I'll be in touch."
She heard him walk away, and a few minutes after that, the body bind lifted. She fell forward, just managing to catch herself before face-planting into the table. Her heart was racing, and her face flushed with anger. If he thought for one second she would save herself by turning her back on everything she believed in, then he didn't know her at all.
He'd see, he'd have to, how important you are, how talented.
Sev had been talking about Lord Voldemort; that was the only real possibility. What did he think he was playing at, palling around with someone like that? They were saying the dark wizard was responsible for at least fifty deaths so far, and he was only operating on the fringes of the pureblood mania that had always existed in the wizarding world. With attacks like the one in Hogsmeade becoming more and more common, it was only a matter of time before his body count skyrocketed.
And it was worse, somehow, that her former friend was doing this to get the life he thought he deserved. The boy she had been friends with would never have hurt someone else to get ahead. Or at least she thought he wouldn't. Everything was so confusing; she wasn't sure if that boy had ever really existed.
She looked at her watch. It was nearly noon. She had missed her morning lesson, which she would probably regret in the evening. Still, she thought hopefully, maybe James had notes she could borrow from Transfiguration. The thought was laughable, not because James wouldn't have excellent notes, but because the idea of borrowing notes from Hogwarts' troublemaker in chief would have been preposterous to her six weeks ago.
She grabbed her bag and stumbled out of the Library, trying to ignore the strange looks she got from students who had arrived after her to study during their breaks. A prickling feeling lingered on the back of her neck, as though someone were watching her. But she couldn't see Snape anywhere, so she tried her best to ignore it.
James was sitting in front of the fire in the common room, an open textbook in his lap. He wasn't reading it, though. His eyes were fixed on a spot on the wall, unfocused and dreamy. She sat next to him, and he closed his eyes and smiled.
"Hey, Lily. You weren't in class."
"No."
Something in her voice made him open his eyes and look at her. He took in the guarded, red eyes and the drawn, tired appearance.
"What happened?"
She thought for a moment, and then, with monumental effort, shook her head. It was better if James wasn't involved in the ongoing drama between herself and Snape. He would probably make it worse.
"Nothing. Just upset about Hogsmeade. Has there been any more news?"
He shook his head, fighting the urge to tuck her hair back behind her ear and gather her up in his arms. She looked so worn out. He hoped she had skivved off class for a nap.
"A lot of rumors, mostly. No one seems to have any idea what the real damage is. I've heard everything from the Shrieking Shack being blown up to every patron at the Three Broomsticks being cursed to smithereens. You know how this place is."
"Can I borrow your notes from Transfiguration?"
"Yeah, no problem. I told McGonagall you were sick. She seemed to buy that."
Lily snorted. "McGonagall hasn't ever believed your excuses. Why would she believe this one?"
"I beg your pardon?" James closed his book with a snap and drew himself up tall, looking down at the smiling redhead with a superior sort of frown. "Minerva McGonagall is putty in my hands. She adores me!"
"She tolerates you."
"She thinks I'm funny!"
"She finds your talent in Transfiguration grudgingly acceptable."
He gasped. "You take that back! I have never in my life scored an Acceptable in Transfiguration! I'll have you know I got an 'O' on my O.W.L., and between you and me, Minnie has practically promised me an 'O' on the N.E.W.T.!"
Lily choked on her laughter. "Minnie?"
"That's right. We have a very special bond."
"Merlin, Prongs, are you waxing poetic about McGonagall again? Give it a rest, mate, she's never going to marry you."
Sirius dropped into the empty space next to Lily, forcing her closer to James.
"I bet you didn't know that there was another woman, did you, Lily?" Sirius continued. Her cheeks flushed and James gave his friend a warning glare, but Sirius continued blithely.
"I expect it's because he's always fancied the older women."
"Padfoot."
"There was that time when we were twelve, Karen Digsby. Remember her, Prongs? Legs for days, even at the ripe old age of 14. Turned into a bit of a stunner as I recall."
"Sirius!"
"Donna Elridge, summer after fourth year. She was a sixth year at Beauxbatons, but you'd never know it to talk to her. The girl's French accent was atrocious."
"Lily, this is total bullocks," James said, still glaring at Sirius. "I don't even remember what he's talking about."
Sirius grinned gleefully and opened his mouth to continue, but Lily stood up abruptly, cheeks burning faintly in the firelight.
"I don't know what you're on about, Sirius, but I really have too much to do to figure it out. James, I'll get those notes from you later. I have to finish that Charms essay Flitwick set out for us, and I can't miss Potions this afternoon."
She rushed up the stairs to her dormitory and never looked back.
James reached over and slugged his friend right in the stomach. Sirius swore and swung back, and in a minute, they had wrestled off the couch and onto the stone floor. James got another good punch in before pulling away and rubbing at his eye.
"What was that for?" Sirius raised his eyebrows and frowned innocently. "I was just making conversation."
"You're a git. Making conversation, my arse. We were having a—a moment. I ought to hex you."
"A moment? Sounds like you've already been hexed, mate. Take it from me, that bird isn't worth it. Did you see how high and mighty she got when I mentioned your other girlfriends?"
James stood up, grabbing his book and bag quickly. "Making jokes about McGonagall is one thing. But I kissed Karen on a dare. Your dare, if I remember it right. And Donna is a friend of my parents and stayed with us for the summer with her parents. I only spent time with her when forced and you were there for most of it! Honestly, Padfoot, what is your problem?"
"Problem?" Sirius said airily. "No problem. You're the one with your pants twisted up your bum."
With another weighty glare, James left the common room and headed for his office, hoping to take refuge there and put his head on straight before Potions. Sirius watched him go.
"I'm not the problem here," he muttered quietly, kicking his feet up in front of the fire and leaning his head back against a nearby armchair.
:o:o:o:o:o:o:
Lily collapsed onto her bed, grateful that none of her roommates were present. Her mind was racing, but she wasn't happy with any of the possible subjects at hand. Then her eyes fell upon the rolled up parchment she had taken from James the night before. Tee's letter! An excellent distraction.
She unrolled it with a happy little sigh, sure that Tee was about to impart some awe-inspiring wisdom that would fix her problems and make James easier to deal with.
Dear Future Head Girl,
Welcome to Hell.
Lily frowned. And re-read. No, she had read that correctly. She began again.
Welcome to Hell. As you've no doubt already realized, this job is a constant race against the clock. It requires dedication, determination, and focus like you would not believe. Don't let anything get in your way. The only way you're going to survive this year is by sheer force of will. I don't care if you're top of your class or never had to study before in your life, the responsibilities of being Head will trump all that and leave you spinning.
"Nice one, Tee, don't lay it on thick or anything," Lily muttered.
I hope your Head Boy is just as dedicated as you, and not as handsome as Gideon. Yes, I said handsome.
Lily's pulse began to race.
Don't go getting any romantic notions. I'll tell you right now, it is a Bad Idea, getting involved with your fellow Head. It may seem perfect. You're alone in the office, maybe studying late after patrols. You're always together. He sees you more than his girlfriend, knows you better than his own sister. Why wouldn't you be perfect together?
"Yeah, why not?" Tee was giving voice to the forbidden thoughts Lily had been having for weeks, painting the vivid details she had been trying to ignore every time they were alone together.
I'll tell you why. Because when it all goes sour, you'll have no one to rely on. No matter how perfect you think that romance might be, it is no substitute for a reliable partnership. Remember what I said earlier about this year being Hell? I meant it. And you don't want to go through Hell alone.
A weight settled into Lily's stomach.
I know this probably isn't the advice that you expected, but its the advice I wish that someone had given me.
Don't fall in love with the Head Boy.
Now that I've got that out of the way, let's talk Prefect management.
But Lily couldn't concentrate on the rest of the letter. One thing was for sure: Potter was never going to see Tee's letter. Ever.
Don't fall in love with the Head Boy.
A/N: Thanks for reading!