Hello lovlies!

Here is another chapter! Sorry for the lateness of it... I had a bit of writers block and had to do some research. I tried to make it accurate but I'm not sure. If anyone knows anything about Broadway Rehearsals once a show opens officially, please tell me lol. I could use the insight.

I also had some difficulties with some issues that I have. I have something called Borderline Personality Disorder and I have pretty much decided to stay on my own the last year or so after having a marriage, a serious relationship and what could have been a good thing blow up in my face because of how I handle things. I recently realized that I have a good friend I have fallen for and the whole concept of being with them terrifies me because now that I am on my own, I have an idea of how to handle things and I'm afraid of losing that again... I'm rambling lol sorry. But yeah... it distracted me from writing so I apologize.

The gang is back in New York and Rachel & Jesse deal with matters the way they know best. There's a few lighter moments in here. I wanted to keep things a little happier since everything has been so serious lately in the story.

Thank you for all the reviews, favorites and follows. You guys keep me motivated to write! I don't think I've held onto a story this long so yay!

I will TRY to have something by Friday but the Tribute episode is probably gonna make me sob for a while lol. Maybe it will inspire me. I do know that tissue will be handy!

I own nothing but the story.

Chapter 10
Total Eclipse of the Heart

New York City, NY

It had been a grueling day for the cast of Funny Girl. They had been doing run-throughs for the last eight hours. Rachel was exhausted and her throat was beginning to feel the strain. She focused on the fact that opening night was tomorrow and that this was everything she could have ever hoped for.

Backstage, however, head of wardrobe stood with the producers with a grim look on her face. They had Vern concerned with Rachel's obvious weight loss since the summer. They were concerned that she wasn't managing as well as they had hoped, which was understandable under the circumstances. Jesse was quickly brought into the conversation, knowing that the two co-stars were close. Jesse suggested that perhaps she was taking on too much and should consider taking a sabbatical from NYADA; however, he knew Rachel. She would do what she had too in order to keep on top of everything. He knew her grades had slipped at school. The weight loss was obvious. It didn't matter how much of a show face he had going, she wasn't doing well. Jesse sighed as the conversation ended. He and Rachel still hasn't talked much since the whole ordeal; and somehow, Rachel had dodged any kissing during the run-throughs as she had during the rehearsals prior to the incident. He knew she would be professional come show time but he was genuinely concerned. It was time for the rest of the apartment's residences to become aware of the situation at hand with her well-being. Her fathers were there for the week- maybe now was the perfect time or maybe it wasn't. He would talk to Kurt, Blaine and Santana as soon as he could. He went over to his bag and pulled out his phone. He wrote a text to them quickly asking them to meet him in Kurt's walk in closet at 10 that night. He threw the phone back into the bag and walked into the staff kitchenette. He prepared Rachel a tea with honey; knowing her voice needed it. He could hear the strain while she sang Don't Rain on my Parade. To most people, it would sound pristine but he knew better.

With the tea finished, he walked out to where Rachel settled after her run through DROMP and handed her the tea. She smiled at him in appreciation, he simply nodded to her in response and headed towards the wardrobe area.

"Jesse?" She called softly. He turned around and looked at her. ". I think we need to..."

"There's nothing to talk about, Rachel," he said flatly. She flinched. He didn't call her Rach anymore. "I have to get back to rehearsals, excuse me."

Rachel watched as Jesse disappeared from her sighed. She slumped back into her seat and leaned her head back. She needed him badly right now. How could he not see that? There had to be a way to get through to him.

Within seconds of being out of sight, Jesse cursed himself. He knew she wasn't dealing well and he wasn't helping matters. The woman had the world on her shoulders and he was acting like a child. He was 21 now; he had to start acting like it and let go of the Miva attitude. At least when it came to personal relationships. He half screamed in frustration, running his hands through his hair.

It was another three hours before they were finally let go by the directors; Jesse glanced at his cell phone – all parties confirmed. It was now nine-thirty. He had a half hour to make his way home to meet with the others. Living near the theatre district had its advantages. The roads were decent this hour and he knew he would probably be home within the next fifteen minutes or so. Rachel had plans to meet up with her dads, so he knew the risk of her walking in on their conversations – still, they could never be too careful. The closet was the best place for them, without a doubt.

He made it to the apartment with a solid ten minutes to spare. He popped a coffee into his Tassimo and stirred in some coffee creamer. He grabbed his mug and walked through the penthouse and into Kurt`s walk-in. Blaine and Santana were already there, sitting on the floor in the centre talking about something. Jesse nodded a hello at the pair and sat down on the floor with them. Turns out they had been discussing the matter at hand with Rachel.

"Where's Kurt?" Jesse asked as he made himself comfortable on the floor

"I'm right here," Kurt said as he rushed into the room, throwing his work bag down and practically threw himself onto the floor beside Blaine, leaning in to give him a kiss. "Isabella had a bit of an issue at the office so I had to handle that. So, Rachel."

Santana nodded, her eyes boring into Jesse. "Why don't you start by telling us what happened between the two of you? Don't tell me nothing happened, you two went from being attached to the hip to barely even talking. Something happened in Lima."

"Yeah, something did," Jesse sighed, running his hand through his hair, "We were at her place and she was obviously upset by everything going on. I did what I always did to calm her down and she started kissing me. At first, I was shocked. I didn't know what to think. Obviously instinct and carnal desire won out and I kissed her back."

"Oh my god!" Kurt exclaimed, "You two slept together, didn't you? Oh my god, Jesse! How –"

"No, we didn't," Jesse stated forcefully, giving Kurt slight cut eye, "I think that's the problem or maybe not. I don't know. My avoiding her on the topic is probably not helping matters."

"She turned you down and now feels stupid," Santana concluded, leaning back on her elbows, "its Rachel, she might just be doing her drama queen thing."

"I turned her down," Jesse said flatly, looking at the floor. "She was more than willing. She wanted me to make the pain stop and… when she said that… I just couldn't do it."

"Well I'll be damned," Santana piped, "Jesse St. James got a chance to bang his dream girl and he walked away because he didn't want to be used. I'm shocked. I am actually shocked."

Blaine patted Jesse on the back, ignoring the Latina, "She will talk to you when she's not feeling so ashamed. I can imagine how she feels right now."

Kurt studied Jesse's guilty face and shot him daggers. "Really Jesse? You're giving her the cold shoulder? When did she try talking to you?"

Jesse flinched and Santana sat up, staring at the boy in disbelief. "Today at the theatre. I gave her some tea because her voice was straining and she tried getting me to talk. I dismissed her, telling her there was nothing for us to talk about."

"Jesse!" the trio shouted in unison

"Oh I'm about to go all Lima Heights on you," Santana said standing up, pacing the room while swearing in Spanish.

"I know, alright? I regretted it almost immediately," Jesse groaned in frustration and threw himself onto the floor. "I have been trying to carry the world for her and I suppose I got selfish. In retrospect, I am in the right, however, considering what she has been through, I should have given her an opportunity to speak her mind on the matter. I was selfish in doing so, I know."

"I don't think so," Blaine stated, only to receive a look from his Fiancé, "Hear me out before you give me that look. You have done so much for Rachel, for all of us, and you are human. You are allowed to be hurt and what happened with Rachel hurt. You don't have to push those feelings aside just because of everything. While it is most unfortunate, life doesn't just stop. Do I think you should have dismissed her? No, of course not. However, to call yourself selfish for feeling is unfair to yourself."

Kurt rolled his eyes and Santana sat down on one of the luxury bean bag chairs. "I agree with Blaine. Simple solution, talk to her tonight when she gets back from spending time with her dads. Clear the air with her. Even if it a simple 'I'm not mad at you yada yada' speech."

Jesse nodded. "What do we do about how she is doing? Obviously she isn't doing as well as we all had thought, even the wardrobe personale at the Theatre are concerned. We have all heard the vomiting that follow crying episodes, the mood swings…"

"The pacing around the apartment at three and four in the morning, sometimes even humming 'Faithfully' or 'Make You Feel My Love'." Kurt added

"The big thing, though, and I agree with Jesse is the lack of eating and her apparent weight loss," Blaine stated, "She was thin to begin with. I don't, however, think this is only Finn's death that's causing this."

Jesse shook his head. "No, of course not. I think maybe she has taken on far too much. Funny Girl is demanding nearly every free minute we have. We are still in rehearsals, technically speaking. The official opening isn't for two weeks. We are just doing previews starting tomorrow. This director, while brilliant in his own way, is notorious for coming down even harder on the cast once previews open."

"Things calm down though, on the rehearsal side of things don't they? Once it's opened…" Santana inquired

The men nodded. "During previews, they do a sliced rehearsal schedule, however, once it officially opens I think there's a limit to how often they can enforce rehearsals?"

Jesse nodded at Blaine's statement/question. "Eight hours a week maximum once the show begins previews. We will still be running roughly eight shows a week, I believe, more around Christmas as per usual."

"I do suppose that will make things easier on her, will it not?"

Jesse shrugged. "Yeah, I mean if she would have taken time off school rehearsals would have been the time to do it. I took a decline in my classes. I only personally have half of what any of you have. I go back up to full in January."

"So maybe we just got to keep on her about eating and getting some down time until things get a little saner?" Santana suggested

Kurt nodded. "I agree."

Blaine pulls out his phone and opens up an app where he can take some notes. "Previews start on the 16th of November. How long do they run?"

"Two weeks," Jesse noted, looking at his iPhone. "Seven shows a week."

Santana looked perplexed, "And how long are rehearsals during these two weeks?"

Jesse laughed at Santana's reaction. "Depends on what they think needs to be worked on. It could be little or we could be hounded, we just don't know."

"You people are insane!" Santana exclaimed in mockness. "Kurt, did she change her schedule, do you know?"

"I know she saw Carmen last week," he stated. "What about, I have absolutely no idea. I am going to assume as much. I know Carmen was pushing for it."

Jesse nodded, "Carmen had asked me how she was holding up. I think a few faculty members have noticed her struggling. She mentioned she may enforce a reduced schedule. They want to see their students succeed. She has been a force to be reckoned with since she walked in the door. From winning the Winter Showcase as a freshman and getting a lead in a revival of a major Broadway production. They are going to do anything they can for her."

"I say we plan a movie time or something," Kurt suggested, "Help us all relax and what not. Monday's are dark aren't they?"

Jesse nodded. "Yeah, that sounds like a good idea Kurt."

"So it's settled," Santana stated standing up. "We keep an eye on Rachel, we have movie nights as a group and we keep going. I like it."

"You're in a hurry," Blaine noted with a grin. "Seeing Dani tonight?"

Santana smiled brightly. "Yes! We are heading to some concert at Central Park. You guys can come."

Kurt and Blaine nodded enthusiastically. "Rachel's out, you should come with us. Could be a lot of fun."

Jesse shook his head. "I'm alright. I think I am going to take the time and write some music or something to take my mind of things. But thanks for the invite, Kurt."

The group disappeared fairly quickly leaving Jesse alone in the closet. He stood there for a moment listening to a faint music coming from his bedroom. Rachel was home, though he was confused as to why. The conversation took maybe twenty minutes and was mostly uneventful. His phone vibrated in his hand. It was a text from Kurt.

Rachel's dads are running late from a show. Go talk to her.

He pocketed his phone. He came to the door of the closet and stopped. The music was all too familiar. He closed his eyes and sang..

Turn around...

Rachel was in the bedroom, staring out one of the windows when the music began to play a gentle melody. It was the opening notes for a song she once used to apologize to Jesse. She smiled as she remembered that day. A time when life was a little simpler. She often wondered what would have happened if Jesse would have forgiven her for it all. She leaned against the wall and allowed the music to take over. Then she heard Jesse's voice from across the apartment. How she heard it, she wasn't sure. The music wasn't on that loud. Maybe the acoustics were just that good. She didn't even notice when her voice took over to join Jesse.

Every now and then I get a little bit lonely and you're never coming around.

Jesse, who was still standing in the doorway of the closet, smiled. He responded in perfect timing.

Turn around...

Rachel didn't open her eyes. Her mind was imagining her kneeling on Finn's grave as she laid roses on his grave.

Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears

Jesse slowly ventured out of the doorway of the closet and slowly walked into the living room area.

Turn around

Rachel's mind was still wrapped up in memories. This time she imagined leaning against the bridge in New York with Finn.

Every now and then I get a little bit nervous that the best of all the years have gone by

Every now and then I get a little bit terrified and then I see the look in your eyes

Rachel opened her eyes. Jesse was now half walking and half dancing around the living room, dramatically making his way towards the bedroom.

Turn around bright eyes

Rachel closed her eyes again and let a tear fall from her eyes, remembering a time when Finn sang those words.

Every now and then I fall apart

Jesse vocals filled the space as he leaned against the piano in the living room.

Turn around bright eyes

Rachel pulled away from the wall dramatically and rested both of her hands against the glass.

Every now and then I fall apart...
And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever
And if you'll only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever...

Rachel turned around and leaned against the glass, the palm of her hands against the glass at her sides. Jesse was still leaning on the piano, debating his next move.

And we'll only be making it right
'Cause we'll never be wrong
Together we can take it to the end of the line
Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks

Rachel's eyes became fixated on the door to the bedroom. Almost as if she was contemplating her next move.

I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight

She slowly pulled herself away from the glass and slowly made her way towards the door, grasping the TV stand as she walked.

Once upon a time I was falling in love
But now I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart

Jesse looked up from the piano and noticed Rachel standing in the entrance of the living room leading from the bedroom area. She was dressed in her favorite yoga pants and a black tank top, her hair loosely over her shoulders. The outfit was a match of Jesse's very low riding sweat pants (they sat just above the pelvic line) and no shirt. He had torn it off in Kurt's closet, originally intending to shower before the music started. Rachel slowly began to walk towards Jesse as he walked around the piano.

Once upon a time there was light in my life
But now there's only love in the dark
Nothing I can say
A total eclipse of the heart

Jesse and Rachel met in the middle of the living room where they began a contemporary dance to the music break of the song. Their body's moving as one, they utilized the space around them. Their moved a fluid and flawless, as if the part had been choreographed and practiced for hours on end. As the musical break came to an end, Jesse pulled Rachel towards him so her body was pressed to his as they sang.

Turn around bright eyes

Rachel kept her body against Jesse's and moved them over a few steps to the right.

Every now and then I fall apart

The two bodies took a few fluid steps towards the left. Both grateful they took ballet growing up.

Turn around bright eyes

Rachel spun around, keeping her body against his and looked in his eyes as they repeated the motions. Their eyes never unlocking.

Every now and then I fall apart
And I need you now tonight
And I need you more than ever

Rachel broke the grasp and grabbed onto the piano, her eyes remaining locked with Jesse's.

And if you'll only hold me tight
We'll be holding on forever
And we'll only be making it right
'Cause we'll never be wrong
Together we can take it to the end of the line

Rachel looked away from Jesse and walked over to the window, opening the invisible door to the terrace. She leaned against the rail. Jesse came up behind her but didn't touch her.

Your love is like a shadow on me all of the time (all of the time)
I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark
We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks

Rachel turned around and looked at Jesse with pleading, sad eyes.

I really need you tonight
Forever's gonna start tonight

Rachel rested her head against Jesse, he wrapped his arms around her. The music was silenced by the door closing but Rachel's soft voice broke the cool evening wind.

Once upon a time I was falling in love

Jesse lifted her head and looked in her eyes as they sang together.

But now I'm only falling apart
There's nothing I can do
A total eclipse of the heart
A total eclipse of the heart

Rachel pulled away and turned her back to Jesse as a tear rolled down her cheek.

A total eclipse of the heart

Jesse walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her. He rested his head against her shoulders as the final words rolled off his tongue.

Turn around bright eyes

Inside the Penthouse

A silence fell between them. Although Rachel had once used the song as a way to apologize to him, he understood the context to her life now. Everything was clearer. Music had given her the strength to say the words she didn't dare to speak.

Inside, Rachel's dads appeared with Rosalie. The trio stood in the living room, watching the pair with smiles on their faces.

"Is she alright with him?" LeRoy asked concerned. "I remember those horrid nightmares he caused her. Our baby couldn't sleep well for weeks."

Rosalie snickered. "Yes. He regretted it, I hope you know."

"Oh?" Hiram inquired as Rosalie threw her bag onto the sofa and sat down.

The men followed suit. "He came home that night and locked himself up. He only came out for anything related to vocal adrenaline. He was hurt from the video and did the rash thing. He regretted leaving her at that school. He knew in his heart that he should have stayed there with her."

LeRoy watched as Jesse placed a kiss on his daughter's forehead and his daughter smile in return. "Kurt mentioned that he talked to Madame Tibideaux in Chicago in regards to her admission. Is this true?"

Rosalie nodded with a smile. "Yes. He only ever wanted to make her dreams come true. Now they are and he couldn't be prouder. He just wishes she wasn't going through what she is."

Hiram pursed his lips, "Yes, none of us wish this madness on Rachel. She loved that boy very much. I just hope she can overcome it all and live a happy life. She deserves to find love again someday. Maybe not now - let her take her time."

Rosalie smiled, giving LeRoy the same knowing look he gave to her.

"I don't think you need to worry about that, Mr. Berry."

Outside, the pair were oblivious to the adults talking about them from the sofa. They were lost in their own St. Berry world. Rachel felt safe. The two days she wasn't able to do exactly this, she felt lost and afraid. Jesse made her feel like she was strong enough to survive the pain she was in. She looked up at Jesse, afraid of what she may find hidden in his eyes. She spent a solid minute or two searching them, looking for some sign of anger or hatred and there was none. There was love and… understanding? Did he truly understand what she was trying to tell him?

"Are we okay now?" Rachel asked, her voice quivering.

Jesse smiled at the girl, "There was never anything wrong. You know how we are… we are both drama queens. I thought we established that a few years ago. If I remember correctly, we were standing on the Vocal Adrenaline stage."

Rachel smirked. "I thought we established that I was the bigger drama queen…"

"Oh, you are, however, in order for us to establish that you are the bigger drama queen I have to admit to the fact that I am also a drama queen. I believe my exact words were 'you're a bigger drama queen than I am.'"

Rachel gave him a look. "Are we seriously having this as a discussion right now?"

Jesse laughed and kissed her forehead. "We are fine. We both just had to stew and deal with things our own way. We do need to start talking about stuff though. We usually don't and it ends badly."

Rachel pouted. "You mean with eggs on my head?"

"I was thinking watermelon this time but then I figured it would have been painful so I considered grapes… or tomatoes…."

Rachel tightened her grip around Jesse's waist and thought. "I would have to say grapes. The green ones though. They won't stain."

"Okay, so you're going to wait here while I grab some from the fridge," Jesse pretended to pull away from Rachel only to have Rachel put dead weight down in attempt to keep him from leaving. "You know this has to happen. Don't make me use brute force, missy."

Rachel gave him a challenging look, "You wouldn't dare."

Jesse smirked and scooped the girl up, throwing her over his shoulder. Rachel protested rather loudly. She was far from amused by Jesse's actions and made it clear. Jesse ventured into the penthouse and had a full intention of bringing Rachel into the kitchen this way when he heard a deliberate cough coming from the living room. He turned around, a squealing Rachel on his shoulder and came face to face with Rosalie and Rachel's dads.

"Hi Dad, daddy," Rachel squeaked out, "How was the show?"

Jesse was standing in the bathroom him and Rachel shared, finishing up his night time routine when Rachel walked in to finish off her own. She was wrapped up in bright pink robe with a gold star on the left side of her chest and her name written under it, a gift from Jesse after the group moved in officially. She had her moisturizing bag clutched in her hand when she walked over to him and smacked him playfully in the gut.

"What was that for?" Jesse exclaimed, glancing over at her with his face half covered with shaving cream.

"Carrying me inside the penthouse while you're half naked," she snipped with humor to her voice. "I can't believe my dad's saw that."

Jesse looked flabbergasted. "It's not we were naked."

Rachel raised her eyebrow, "You might as well have been. I think my dad's saw more of you than they ever intended too in their life."

"What's with that smirk then?" Jesse stood straight and puffed out his chest, "Admit it, I am the perfect male specimen."

Rachel looked up at him through the mirror and laughed, "You're so hard to take seriously with that stuff all over your face."

Jesse looked at her with an evil grin on his face, "You mean this stuff?"

In a swift movement, Jesse took some of the shaving cream from the can and wiped it on Rachel's cheek causing her to squeal.

"Jesse St. James!"

He kissed her cheek, shaving cream still covering his face, leaving a mark on her cheek. "That's my name, don't wear it out."

With that, he grabbed the towel he had lying on the counter and sprinted to the other side of the bathroom, armed with his can of shaving cream. Rachel wiped her face off with a towel and glared at him. She reached into her cabinet and pulled out her shaving cream. The two of them spent the next ten minutes or so, chasing one another around the bathroom and Jesse's room, laughing, squealing and acting pretty much like kids. They paid no attention to the fact that it was nearly midnight and her fathers were asleep at the moment. Or at least had been. From the guest room, her dads were startled awake by the commotion, however, they said nothing. They laid in bed with one another and simply relished the fact that their daughter was happy and laughing. There was no way they were going to interrupt that; the moments didn't happen often.

Rachel was cornered in the bedroom by Jesse who had somehow come into possession of a second can of shaving cream. Both of them were covered from head to toe though neither of them seemed to mind. Rachel gave him a mistevious grin and went to slide under his arm but slipped through the slickness of the shaving cream and began what would have been a sure face plant when Jesse grabbed her and managed to break her fall by sending them both toppling onto the bed with him landing on top of her. The two of them burst out laughing yet never changed their positioning on the bed. Rachel looked up at him and took some of the shaving cream off his cheek and put it on his nose. He leaned forward and gave her an Eskimo kiss, causing her nose to get covered as well. Their eyes locked and they both froze. Jesse wanted nothing more than to kiss her, however, he knew she probably wouldn't react well to it. Rachel laughed awkwardly and pushed him to the side as she sat up. She felt her hair and groaned in annoyance.

"I already showered," she sighed. "Now I'm going to have to do it again."

Jesse sat up and settled in beside her, understanding her reaction. "Go have a bath. Relax. I'll go in bathroomette and have a shower."

"Naw," Rachel responded, resting her head on his shoulder, "A shower is fine. Stay with me tonight? You're still Jesse to me. I didn't sleep well when we were fighting. When you're in here with me, I don't have nightmares."

Jesse smiled and nodded. "Of course, whatever you need Rachel."

There was silence between them before Jesse went to stand up. Rachel grabbed his hand, causing him to turn around. He looked at her curiously as she stared at the floor, her face riddled with mixed emotions.

"Jesse, I…" she took a deep breath. "You know it will happen someday, right? I'm just…"

His face softened and his eyes began to shimmer, "I know, Rach. Don't worry, alright?"

She nodded sadly, "Meet here in say… twenty?"

"Alright," he said as he kissed the top of her head, "Enjoy your shower."

Rachel nodded and watched as Jesse left the room. She threw herself onto the bed and sighed in frustration. There was no denying that she was blessed to have someone like Jesse in her life. Not only had he been there for her and her friends when their apartment went up in smoke, allowing them to stay there permanently free of charge, he had been the most amazing friend she could have ever asked for. She knew how much he loved her, which was more apparent every day. He understood what she was going through and respected that she was going to need time. Rachel had been wrapped up in Finn once before when she and Jesse were together and there was no way she could do that. It hadn't been fair to either of them then and it wasn't fair to Jesse or Finn's memory now. She wasn't ready to be with anyone – yet. She knew though that when she was finally ready where she was going to end up. All roads lead back to Jesse.

And there ya have it. Read and review peeps!