Levy never realized how many tears she could cry. She'd always thought that after a few moments, they would just stop, but the flood that had opened the minute she approached Gajeel did not slow down in the slightest as she tore through the gardens at the resort. She'd keep things pent up for so long that once the gates were open, there was no shutting them. Her eyes were red and swollen. Her nose burned from the raw skin that she'd rubbed until it almost bled around her nose. The only thing that was soothing to her was the darkness that surrounded her.

Locked behind a deadbolt and a few magical spells that kept everyone else out and the room dark and cool, Levy sat in silence – alone. Had Gajeel really been worth wasting her energy on? Levy's heart had been ripped out of her chest. Gajeel had been nakama – he was family. But after this? Did he even want her to be his nakama again? Levy didn't even care about her feelings toward him. Romance was hardly on her mind at this time. But the friendship that she had worked so hard to develop with him; the friendship that she had invested so much time into….it was all gone because he didn't want her to be near him. All because of something stupid. All because she couldn't get him to listen to her so that she could tell him that he wasn't her biggest fear.

It was the way he made her feel that was her biggest fear – the unknown behind it that truly was frightening. Levy had never felt like this toward someone before. Every day that she worked with Gajeel, she got to know him a little better. She thought he was interesting with his weird quirks, his identifiable laugh, and his strong personality. She wanted to learn more, but now that was going to be impossible. Sure, there were deeper feelings than she was admitting to – even Levy knew that. But it would hurt too much for her to tap into that and bring those feelings to the surface. She'd told him that she could have loved him, but she knew that wasn't quite the truth. Levy did love Gajeel. She just didn't know how to say it.

The logic in her mind told her that it was impossible to love someone that you barely knew, but Levy had felt a kinship with Gajeel since the moment he saved her from the attack Laxus had through her way years ago. She'd been hesitant at first – stepping lightly when he was involved. However, things had changed when he offered to be her partner on Tenrou. He'd made her promises then. Lots of promises. And Levy had thought that he would keep those promises. When they had returned from their frozen state, Levy found herself staying close to Gajeel. No one knew what they had experienced on the island except for themselves. No one knew what life had been like returning from that disaster only to find that their friends and families had gone on to live life without them. Levy had experienced her own form of heartbreak, but Gajeel had been there to comfort her, even if it was in his own way.

"Aye, Shortstack! You okay?"

It had been on particularly rough afternoon for Levy. She'd reached out to old friends, only to find that they were now living the life that she had only dreamt of living herself. They were married, had children, and were expecting another. They were happy and Levy had missed out on experiencing those things with them. She'd only ever wanted to be a mom one day and she'd only ever wanted to experience those things with the people she considered her family.

"Gajeel? Yeah…I'm okay. I just have a heavy heart today, that's all."

Levy watched as Gajeel took a seat next to her, sitting outside under the cool spring breeze as they adjusted to life again. "I can't believe we were gone for such a long time. I feel….I feel so lost, you know?"

That day had been the first day that she realized Gajeel was her friend. He placed his arm around her shoulder, nudging her and giving her a place to rest her head as they talked. He listened to her for what seemed like hours, providing advice to her when he could. But Gajeel didn't make one snide comment about what she had been feeling at that moment. He was her silent wall.

They'd started going on jobs together then, with Jet, Droy, and Lily too, of course. It wasn't all the time, but Gajeel and Lily were unofficial members of Team Shadowgear, even if they didn't want to admit it. Levy and Gajeel had latched onto one another. They'd learned so much about one another. Grew so goddamn close! It was only natural that Levy decided that she had feelings for him. She'd always wondered about Gajeel and the dark promises that he held.

But all of those hopes were long gone. Gajeel had made himself completely clear with his determination and now Levy was sitting in a dark hotel room, on HER vacation, sobbing and looking like a drowned rat. This had been the worst decision of her entire life.

"Stupid. Gajeel." Levy sniffed loudly before more sobs wracked her. "Can't believe I…I….I….trusted him to…to…keep his promises!" Her fists clenched next to her as she grabbed at the blankets on her bed. "Stupid…stupid me. I can't believe I let him make me so weak!"

Hours later, Levy awoke from her fitful slumber. She yawned and rubbed at her swollen eyes. She must have fallen asleep without meaning to. Her sleep had been dreamless and peaceful – a welcoming experience for someone so devastated and torn. But the sleep she had received had provided her with a touch of clarity. It was time to head back to the guild and throw herself into her work.

Levy turned on the light for the first time since she blockaded herself into her room. She silently wondered to herself if any of the other guild members had been looking for her. With a shrug, she brushed those thoughts off and grabbed her clothes. She'd shove everything back into her bags and hit the road as soon as she could.

It didn't take long for her to pack, but her heart was beating rapidly in her chest and her breathing was rushed and shallow as if she had just run a marathon. Anxiety crept up the back of her neck. She had to leave. She had to get out of here as soon as possible! Thoughts of Gajeel were going to start working their way back into her mind and Levy didn't want anything to do with that. Once she was certain she had everything, Levy took one last look around the room before she left.

It was a good thing she paused to double check herself. The orange lacrima shimmered out to her from a crack between the bed and the nightstand.

"Oh my god! I can't believe I almost left this!" Levy rushed over to the necklace, clutching it to her chest. She hadn't realized just how important the piece of silly jewelry had become to her in the few short days she'd had it. But Levy thought it was pretty and it soothed her anxiety almost immediately. There was something about the lacrima that had been used – it wasn't exactly just for decoration, was it? Curiosity struck her as she turned it over and over in her hands. Her fingers ran across the words that were inscribed in the metal setting, stopping over the design at the bottom.

"Levy, Loke wanted me to tell you something."

She still hadn't the slightest clue as to who the necklace was from. Maybe it was time to throw herself into some mindless jobs and do some research into the necklace. There was something special about it – Levy was positive about that fact. With a quick scribble on a blank sheet of paper, explaining to her guildmates where she went, Levy sighed and left the hotel room. Her destination – Magnolia.

Gajeel knew that he had been wrong. He'd watched Levy disappear in a river of tears that he knew wouldn't slow down. He'd tried to follow her and apologize, but he hadn't been successful in finding her. His nose told him that she was in her room, but when he busted in the door, there hadn't been a single soul in there. The room had been dark and Gajeel had wondered if maybe there was a magical concealment spell that had been cast on the room. Levy wouldn't have done that though – she probably ran to Lucy and Erza for comfort.

Gajeel walked along in the darkness toward the flickering bonfire his guildmates were gathered around. Their voices were hushed and everyone went effectively quiet when Gajeel sat down on one of the benches.

"Hiya Gajeel."

He grunted in response as everyone looked at him. If they hadn't known better, they all could have sworn they saw sadness in his eyes. But Gajeel wasn't going to let them see that he was vulnerable. No, he wasn't that kind of person.

"Sorry Levy bailed on you." This time, it was Jet who spoke to him. The other two members of Shadowgear gave him weak smiles. "I guess she got an emergency message from the guild and had to go for some official script mage business. She does that from time to time."

"Yeah, don't take the loss as being too personal. Duty calls, ya know?"

The chatter started up around them again as everyone assessed the dragon slayers anger at losing the scavenger hunt to be next to nothing. That was what had concerned them – his disappointment at losing, not the fact that he had pushed Levy out of his life except in a professional sense. There was only one person who didn't joke with him about losing the event. One person who only looked at him like he was still the enemy.

"Bunny girl." Gajeel nodded as he walked over to the drink station some time later. Lucy was standing there as he approached, getting a drink for herself and Natsu.

"Gajeel." Her voice was steely and it made Gajeel pause as he poured his beer.

"Is there something wrong or are you just in a pissy mood because Flamebrain hasn't realized you have the hots for him yet?"

Gajeel should have expected the slap her received from her, but he hadn't been. He probably should have known better than to antagonize someone that was close with Levy like that.

"You care to say that again, metal head?" Lucy's eyes narrowed at Gajeel. "Don't pretend like you aren't the one to blame for this. We're nakama, Gajeel. You don't treat family like that. You don't treat someone like Levy like that especially. She was nothing but nice to you. She has always been your friend and you….you….you hurt her, goddamn it!"

"You don't know the whole story, blondie, so why don't you just go back to brushing your hair or whatever it is you like to do in your free time? I'm not playing these games with any of you tonight. The whole guild probably knows what's going on by now anyway, and I just don't have the patience to deal with it."

As irritated as Lucy was, she was determined to protect Levy and her reputation. "Levy would never tell someone she didn't trust about the conversation you two had. The only reason that I know is because I'm the one who made sure she got on the right train to Magnolia a few hours ago." And Levy had spilled her guts to Lucy. It surprised the celestial mage that Levy had taken things so bravely. No tears spill from her eyes as the bluenette spoke about Gajeel. She stood tall and strong, even smiling and laughing as she said goodbye to Lucy. But the blonde had seen the pain in her friend's eyes. Gajeel was going to get his ass kicked – by a girl, nonetheless.

"How can you tell someone that you don't care for them like that, Gajeel? She was the only one in the guild who stood up for you when no one else would. If it wasn't for Levy McGarden, you'd be stuck in a state of loneliness, regardless of your guild status or not. She's good people, Gajeel – she doesn't deserve this. Not when she was only trying to help you."

Gajeel set his glass down on the table before he turned to look at Lucy fully. "Listen you – don't start talking to me about Levy. I know her better than you think I do. I've worked with her on more jobs than you can even imagine. I know her favorite color is orange, how she snores when she sleeps, that she doesn't like to step on spiders because she thinks they have feelings too. I know that she feels like she's been left behind by her other friends that weren't stuck on the island, how she fears that she's not strong enough to protect her friends and family. You have no right to lecture me on what I've done to her or what I haven't done to her, because you don't know anything."

Gajeel swallowed hard, doing his best to not raise his voice and attract attention. He really didn't need to air his dirty laundry out for the entire guild to entertain themselves with. Gajeel picked up his glass and attempted to take a drink of his beverage, but he just couldn't before he spilled the last of his thoughts.

"You have never seen pain in her eyes the way I have, Bunny Girl. You've never felt how fragile she is. You've never watched as her bones had cracked or how her skin bruises with just the slightest pressure. You've never been the cause of the disappointment that lurks in the back of her mind or the doom that hangs over her when something reminds her of what you used to be. You don't know the first thing about anything, so you'd be wise to keep your nose out of our business."

Gajeel put his glass down on the table, turning to walk off into the night alone.

Lucy stood there, gaping in the darkness, tears hanging in the back of her eyes unable to be shed at the pure shock of what had just happened.

"Hey, Lu, hurry up with those drinks will ya?" It was only when Natsu's voice caught her ears that Lucy had realized she was standing alone. Levy and Gajeel had some deep feelings to address. Their story was a sad one, but Lucy had hope for a happy ending yet.

"Ugh, this is so frustrating!"

It was day two in the library for Levy. She'd poured over dozens of books on every topic she could think of that had to do with lacrimas (bright orange or other colors) and she hadn't been able to find anything that fit what she was looking for.

"There has to be something out there on this!"

Maybe she could ask Lucy to summon Loke to help her. Levy's friends were returning from Akane Beach today – it was only a matter of time before they arrived in the guild hall. News had gotten back at that Gray and Lisanna had won the scavenger hunt. Levy was glad for them – at least her departure hadn't really ruined anything for the other guild members.

"Levy-chan! I've brought you tea!" Kinana appeared next to the script mage with some minor refreshments.

"Oh thank you so much!" Her stomach rumbled in appreciation. "I guess I've been down here longer than I thought. Has anyone else returned yet, Kinana?"

"Actually, yes –kina! Some of them are in the main hall, others have gone back to their quarters to rest. Would you like me to pass along a message to any of them?"

"No…thank you so much for the food and information though!"

"Don't work yourself too hard, Levy-chan!"

Levy smiled as Kinana walked away. Her eyes closed as she inhaled a few pieces of finger food that sat on a plate in front of her. "Mmhmm. That hit just the spot."

"I know what else could hit just the spot."

Surprise caused Levy's eyes to fly open, widening as she took in the looming form before her.

"…..Loke?"

"It is I, Loke, here to help you, the lovely Levy, figure out what it is you are looking for."

"Okay, stop being so flashy. You forget that I've seen you half naked and saved you from a pack of raging women back in the day."

"Er…well…okay, fine. I wanted to help you…in exchange for a favor."

"What favor?"

"I feel so silly asking you this." Loke flashed Levy an uncertain smile. "But I need you to get that dragon slayer away from Lucy before he makes her forget all about me."

"You…wait, what? You want me to help you get Lucy's attention?"

"No, I want you to get rid of Natsu."

"Can you do that yourself, Loke?"

"Huh. Good point, Levy. Thanks for your insight."

"You're welcome, I guess? I really don't know why you'd bother with that mess though, Loke. You'd be impacting Lucy's happiness. You know how she's attached to Natsu."

Their conversation continued for what seemed like eternity. Levy went back and forth with Loke, helping him weigh the pros and cons of terminating Lucy's relationship with Natsu. Eventually, Loke decided that it probably wasn't in his best interest to pull the plug on that – instead, he decided to look into pursuing other ventures….like Erza.

"Whatever floats your boat, Loke….." Levy couldn't help but grin at the situation. It was so ironic. "But wait, before you leave, you said you'd help me?"

"Oh yes! I almost forgot my original purpose for coming to see you. That necklace you're wearing?"

Levy nodded and grabbed the orange jewel hanging around her neck.

"I think you're looking in all the wrong places. Why don't you try looking into gifts of love? All I see are books on lacrimas. Think about why it was given and when it was given. I know you're smart, Levy, but sometimes, thinking outside the box helps." Loke shrugged then. "I wish I could just tell you, but where's the fun in that? Besides, I'm a big fan of love and I've always wanted to see what happens with your life. You're a fascinating individual, Levy McGarden. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise."

Loke gave Levy a small wave before he started to walk out of the library. She barely registered his voice as he called one last time. "OH, and don't overlook the inscription! You know what I'm talking about!"

The inscription? Did he mean the "Will you be my Valentine?" proposal? There was nothing strange about that. It was just plain words without any special meaning. Maybe Loke had it all wrong. Maybe he didn't really know what Levy had in her hands.

Loke was well informed, however. He was a celestial spirit. An important celestial spirit.

With a sigh, Levy pushed herself up from the table, grabbing a handful of books to place back in the shelves. "Love it is then. Gifts….hmm…what about – ah ha! 'Love: Potions, Artifacts, Spells, and Curses.' This might be a good place to start."

Her snore was so loud that it made her jump out of the chair with a yelp. She had been all alone in the library - a usual experience for the script mage who was almost the sole guild member who utilized the books located here. She had been so stuck on this lacrima stuff that she hadn't realized that it had gotten quite late. Not even the coffee she had shoved down her throat could keep her awake. She'd done whatever she could over the last few days to throw herself into her research. It didn't register that maybe a little bit of sleep every now and then would help her think clearer. It was obvious that her body needed it – the yawns continued to come as she grabbed her bag and shoved the remaining books on the table into it. Levy would return them when she could – this was turning out to be an extensive process.

A book tumbled from her grasp and landed on her foot. The brightness from the orange lacrima caught her eye – was it shining brighter than normal? It had to be her imagination. Bending down to grab the book, something caught her eye within the dark ink.

The art of love – a crafting spell. This was unique – a gift was made by the hands of true love. The power of protection when into it, a special piece of the creator's soul would always glisten inside. It was a gift of protection, meaning that the bearer would always feel the calming, soothing touch of their partner when they were in need. Gifts ranged from trinkets to umbrellas and even…pieces of jewelry. Was this what she had around her neck?

Something told Gajeel that he needed to watch the library doors. He'd done his best to stay out of Levy's way since he had returned to the guild, but he really hadn't needed to. Rumor had it she had locked herself in the library for three days straight – only appearing to grab a bite to eat and use the bathroom. Gajeel had no right to be concerned about her wellbeing. Hadn't he just told her that he wanted nothing to do with her? But Gajeel, although afraid of his feelings, still had them and they wouldn't let him ignore the fact that Levy was all alone in the library. If something bad were to happen to her….Gajeel didn't even want to think about that. A world without Levy McGarden was not a world he wanted to be a part of.

Panic washed through him as something told him that Levy was in trouble. He'd felt a pain in his foot – a throbbing as if something had fallen onto it. But the sense of urgency quickly dissipated. He'd felt that before – when he was waiting outside the building in Hargeon as Team Shadowgear tried to take on that mage all alone. But unlike that time, relief washed through him and moments later, Levy appeared on the side walk with a bag full of books.

"So…whoever gave this to me…" He could hear her mutter on her way home. "Cares for me a lot." Her hand touched the necklace he had made for her and he felt warmth flood through his body. "I just don't know who would make something like this for me. Jet and Droy would have been my first thought – but they both looked so confused when I asked them about it. They even admitted that it was too pretty of a gift to have come from them. Think, Levy! Think!"

Gajeel trailed behind her, making sure to say far enough away that she wouldn't hear him. He'd done this countless times, protecting her from the shadows, making sure that no one and nothing harmed his little script mage.

"Maybe Gajeel…..but no. He wouldn't have done that for me, would he?" Hope swelled in her chest momentarily at the thought. Prior to the other day, she might have thought it possible. But now? She sighed, disappointed.

"No. I need to stop thinking like that."

Levy was quiet for the remainder of the walk home. Just as she was about to take the first step up to her front door when a movement out of the corner of her eye forced her attention to turn from her task.

"Hello?"

Levy called, looking for a sign as to who was there. Something told her that she needed to find them. It frightened Levy that there was someone out there with her this late at night. It had to be near 3 in the morning at the earliest!

"Please don't hide from me."

She had looked so hopeful when she'd thought about him, but then that look of hope had crumbled into nothingness as she finished her walk home. Gajeel felt guilt rip through him. He had been SO close to telling Levy how he felt about her, and now he couldn't face her. He was too afraid of causing her pain.

But there was something about the way she said 'please don't hide from me' that tugged at him. He really should go home. He really shouldn't be here. Hadn't he already made up his mind about being near Levy? After all, he'd done quite a bit of damage at the resort. How much more did he want to hurt the poor girl? Hadn't he done enough?

Levy sighed heavily again, her tired eyes making her see things in the dark that weren't really there apparently. She turned her back to the night and pulled her keys out of her pocket.

Just as she put her house key into the door, her reality took a nose dive into the unbelievable as she heard his voice behind her.

"You shouldn't really be walking home alone at night, Shrimp."

Author's Note:

He can't stay away, guys. He CANNOT stay away.

Let's see if they can kiss and make up in the next post.

I hope you enjoy!

R&R always appreciated - don't hate me for more of these feel heavy words! I love that you guys are all enjoying this so far! Your comments have been so motivating and wonderful!