Chapter 10: "Thank You"
Michonne stared at Rick sheepishly with embarrassment. He caught her trying to sneak out on their meeting.
"Were you really gonna leave?"
Michonne felt a lump rise in her throat. She tried to make up an excuse.
"You were late."
"No. I'm not and you know that."
She saw that he looked hurt by her actions. She stared at the ground.
"I'm sorry." She said quietly. Rick took two steps in the direction of the coffee shop and held out his hand to her.
"Come on."
She looked at his outstretched hand for a couple seconds and slowly took it. Rick held her hand tightly interlocking his fingers between hers. He pulled her to his side and close to him and they walked across the street and into the shop.***********
Rick and Michonne waited patiently for the waitress to bring their coffee. They looked at each other. Rick had guided them to semi secluded seats in the far corner of the shop.
"So…"
"So…"
"Sydney's awake."
"Hmmm. That's good."
"Yes. It is."
Michonne shifted uncomfortably under Rick's blue gaze.
"What were you doing before I called?"
"A friend of mine just gave birth. I was with her in the hospital."
"Why didn't you tell me?! You didn't have to come!"
"I left her with some other friends. She's in good hands."
"Oh.. What was it?"
"A boy."
"That's good."
"He looks just like his father."
"He's probably thrilled."
"He's dead."
Michonne stared at him. The waitress finally brought their coffee. Michonne gladly accepted her cup to break the awkwardness between them. Rick however kept his eyes on her. Rick knew she was stalling. He knew something was bothering her.
"You're stalling."
"What?"
"I said you are stalling. Something is bothering you. What is it?"
Michonne closed her eyes to try and steady herself
"I don't mean to be rude but I didn't come here to talk about my friend or Sydney. This is about you so talk to me."
Tears began flooding her eyes.
"Michonne?"
Michonne opened her eyes suddenly...her heart was pounding hard in her chest.
"I am sorry! I can't do this!"
She rushed out of her seat. Rick reached out and grabbed her but she pulled away. She ran out the coffee shop under the curious stares of other patrons. Rick went out after her.
"Michonne!"**********
Michonne heard Rick calling out to her from behind as she briskly walked away. She didn't look back. She only clutched her chest..her own words strangling her...dying to come out. She has never spoken to anyone about this. As a psychiatrist she knows how dangerous keeping hurt inside is but she didn't follow her own advice.
"Michonne!"
"Leave me alone! This was a mistake!" She shouted out at him without even looking back.
"Talk to me!"
Michonne wiped away her falling tears as she sobbed into the cold night air. Suddenly Rick grabbed her arm and spun her around. His touch made everything just boiled over and spilled out of her. She couldn't hold it in any longer. She blurted out the words that have been slowly killing her for years.
"He raped me!"************
Rick stared wide eyed as he gaped at Michonne. She was crying….hyperventilating in front of him.
"He raped me!" She screamed again out into the night. Shocked by the words Rick instinctively pulled Michonne close and hugged her tightly.
"Shhhhh." Rick said as he rubbed the small of her back to comfort her.
Michonne buried her face into his neck, clinging unto him and cries. There were persons walking around them, staring. Rick didn't care. Suddenly rain started to fall..light at first but then gradually it became heavier..but neither one of them attempted to move to seek shelter.
Instead, they stood there on the sidewalk in the rain allowing the droplets to wash over them. Ten minutes later the rain stopped but still they didn't move. Rick whispered in her ear softly as she whimpered.
"Who did this to you?"
Initially she didn't answer. It was then he realized that she was shivering. He started rubbing his hands quickly over her back in an effort to warm her up. He looked around and saw that there was a motel couple blocks down. He then looked back to where his car was parked but decided that the walk would be a better, more relaxing idea. He gently turned her in the direction of the motel and slowly they began walking down the street.************
A five minute walk took ten minutes. They walked in silence...each wrapped up in their own thoughts. Rick couldn't believe what he just heard. A silent protective instinct was slowly building inside of him and he barely even knew her. But one thing he does know is that he likes Michonne. He likes her a lot. That was strange for him. It generally takes him awhile to warm up to people… Male or females but with Michonne, it was different. This is different.
Michonne knew she had to get it off her chest but why did she do it with him? He is a stranger to her and she to him but somehow she felt safe with him, comfortable with him. She has never let any man ever come this close to her since Negan's brutal attacks because she was afraid to end up with a Negan 2.0. She just couldn't risk it. She hugged Rick tighter as they walked unto the motel's office.************
The motel manager looked at the two wet people in front of him. After the man paid in cash for a room for the night as well as extra towels and two clean robes, the manager gave them a key. He watched as the man scooped the tired woman in his arms and carried her to their room.************
Rick looked away as Michonne removed her wet clothes. She handed them to him and as he gave her the robe she chuckled slightly.
"You saw me naked already Rick."
"True but you weren't awake. Big difference."
Michonne put on the robe and turned around.
"All done."
It was Rick's turn to shed his wet clothes and he did it quickly. Michonne didn't look away when he did and she saw that he had a great body. That made her blush and she turned away and sat on the bed. Rick sat next to her.
"You didn't answer me before."
Michonne looked at him. Rick repeated the question.
"Who did this to you Michonne? Who raped you?"
Michonne swallowed.
"Sydney's father…..my ex husband." she said quietly.
Michonne didn't even look at him. She kept her eyes down casted. Rick took her cold hands in his. She looked up at him and he squeezed her hands. She knew he was urging her to confide in him.
"I threw him out of the house because he was cheating on me. Then I applied for a divorce. He didn't like that. So one night he came over to see Sydney but she wasn't there. He wanted to talk about us...wanted to reconcile. I refused so he raped me."
Michonne closed her eyes to hide her shame. She can't believe she still felt the shame of getting raped all these years later.
"Did you go to the police?"
"Yeah but they said I need more evidence. I couldn't' get it at the time so they didn't charge him. Then he raped me again...twice after that."
"What?!" Rick said...causing Michonne to flinch away from him. He immediately apologized. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry."
"I bit him...on his prick after the last rape and in response he hit me...cracked my jaw. That's how he didn't attack me again."
"Did you go to the police then? You had evidence now."
"I used the last rape to get what I really wanted out of the divorce...full custody of Sydney."
"Hmmm. That was smart."
"Not smart enough. Two years later he applied for joint custody and he got it. I couldn't legally tell the court about the rape as it was sealed."
Michonne eyes now became moist.
"Now Sydney wants us to get back together. She doesn't know about what he did to me. She must never know. She loves her father very much despite him being a complete bastard and I don't want to ruin that for her...her image of her father."
Rick pulled Michonne to lean into him and she obliged. She chuckled slightly.
"What?"
"I'm the psychiatrist. It suppose to be the other way around."
"Let's make a deal. You help me and I will help you. We help each other."
"Deal. I had planned on killing him if he attacked or try to attack me again."
"Well I for one am glad it didn't come to that because you would have left Sydney all alone while you would have gone to jail and I wouldn't have met you."
There was silence in the room.
"Thank you."
"For what?"
"For listening."
"No...thank you."
Michonne looked at him curiously.
"For what?"
"For confiding in me and allowing me to listen."
Michonne smiled.***********
Rick looked at Michonne as she lay on the bed. He sat on the chair and waited patiently as their clothes dry. Now it was Rick who was struggling. Should he tell her about the surveillance devices he found in her home? Was it her abusive ex husband who had been watching her this whole time? How dangerous is her ex? Rick decided against telling her...at least for now until he gets more information. He is not going to risk telling her and she confronting him and getting hurt in the process. He will not allow that.*************
Half an hour later, Rick checked on their clothes and realized that they were dried. He gently woke Michonne up and they both got dressed. Ten minutes later they were on their way walking back to the cafe. When they reached the spot where they stood in the rain they stopped and looked at each other...smiles on their faces. Rick's car is parked across the street.
"Do you want a lift back to the hospital?"
"Nah.. I think I will walk. I have a lot to think about but thanks for the offer."
They faced each other and suddenly without warning Rick kissed her on her cheeks but very close to the side of her lips. Their faces lingered close to each other...dangerously close but neither of them move. They inhaled each other's air, scent for a full minute. Then slowly Michonne pulled away from him. She could see the disappointment in his eyes and she is sorry. She just can't go there with him...with anybody. She was too damaged emotionally to put that kind of burden on someone else. She wasn't sure she was ready either.
"Michonne."
"I'm sorry Rick." Then he watched painfully as she walked away.*************
When Michonne arrived back at the hospital she saw Negan in the hallway outside Sydney's room.
"I was just about to call you."
Michonne looked into the room and saw their daughter was sleeping. She looked at him.
"Why?"
"We need to talk."
"About?"
"About us..our family."
Michonne scoffed at him and walked off in the direction of the cafeteria. He followed her slightly agitated by her dismissive attitude.
"Sydney wants this...us to be together and we owe it to her."
Michonne turned around stopping him in his tracks.
"Sydney doesn't want this! You're planting all these false hopes on her head! Stop it! She's the one who will get hurt the most in the long run when things doesn't work out the way she wants it!"
Negan glared at her angrily.
"I promised our daughter that I will not fight with you but you keep pushing me! We are done! It's over between us so please stop!"
Negan grabbed Michonne and pulled her in a nearby room. Pushing her up against the wall he punched it.
"You just don't seem to get it Mich! We are a family and whether you like it or not...whether you accept it or not you and me will be together in every way possible. I have joint custody so from now on I will be everywhere where you and Sydney are."
He lifted up left hand and Michonne saw that he still wore his wedding ring. She never noticed that before.
"I will have you again. Its only a matter of time, when and where. Just make it easier on yourself. Submit to me."
Michonne slapped Negan hard across the face twice but he kept on smiling. She tried to leave the room but he blocked the door with his wide frame.
"Damn you Negan! Damn you! Why me?! There are so many other women out there! Pick anyone of them! Why can't you just let me be?! Please!"
Negan only grinned at her he smelt her desperation. He took two steps towards her, closing the gap between them jamming his large frame against hers against the wall and at the same time covered her mouth with his large hands. Michonne dug her nails into the flesh of his arm trying to fight him off. He whispered in her ear.
"Never."
He let her go and walked out of the room.**************
Michonne watched as Negan left the room. She had now come to the full realization that Negan will just not stop. He will attack her again..sooner or later to force her to come back to him. She clenched her fist.
"No Negan..." She whispered to herself. "You will not have me again..ever again. I promise you that."*****************
Rick pulled up in his driveway. Tonight's events weighed heavily on his mind as he drove home. Michonne's confession and him keeping the surveillance of her home from her. He was curious about who the bastard of her ex husband was. Pulling out his phone, he did a quick Google search on Michonne. A few articles came up. He read through them quickly and no mention of her ex came up.
He scrolled down and came upon a folder with some pictures. They were from a Mental Health Luncheon she had attended 7 years ago. He click on the folder and the first image that popped up was one where she was standing next to the man he despised..the man he holds responsible for the death of his best friend. His hand was around Michonne's waist as the other holds a very young child. They were smiling. However, it was the caption below the picture that made his blood run cold.
It read: "Secretary of the Mental Health Association Michonne Greaves-Mc Avoy with her husband Director of the FBI Negan Mc Avoy and their two year old daughter Sydney."
Rick's eyes bulged, jaw dropped. He was speechless. A couple minutes passed as he stared at the caption then regained his composure.
"What the...! What the f*ck?!"