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Chapter 10.
Emma woke up in the same position she had dozed off in. She looked at the clock and 5 hours had passed since Rumple had left. She wiggled in her chair to adjust her back. Henry was fast asleep in Regina's hospital bed with his arms still wrapped around his mother's head. The sight pulled a small grin on Emma's lips. She glanced at her watch again and decided it was time to call Rumple. Before she could pull out her phone a voice filled the room.
"Can't rush perfection deary". Rumple said as he entered the room.
"I wasn't trying to rush you, I was simply going to ask how it was going." Emma said slightly embarrassed.
"Well here it is, I went through all the possibilities and I think it should work, it won't have an immediate effect in fact we can't be sure how long it will take but I worked hard on it and I'm confident".
As Emma stood she noticed a gauze covering a small portion of Rumples neck. She realized he too had given a piece of himself to Reginas awakening spell, she said nothing, she knew it would only embarrass him and make him defensive but she knew a piece of him loved her too.
He laid his cane down on the chair and walked over to Regina. He opened a small silver box exposing a vile that held a small purple liquid. He leaned over Regina and opened her mouth, and poured the liquid into it. Henry woke up and glanced at Rumple with a smile on his face.
"Now we wait, we wait for a sign that it's working". Rumple said.
Before he could finish his thought Henrys eyes widened.
"Look the cut on her neck is healing".
Emma ran over and looked at Reginas neck, the once red bruised cuts surrounding her neck turned a light shade of pink and looked almost as if they had never been there. A smile hit all 3 faces as they knew the potion was doing what they had hoped.
"Did it work is she awake" the voice belonging to Snow fulfilled the silence.
"Not yet but look it's working" a jittery Henry spoke as he bounced lightly on the bed.
Snow walked over to Regina and smiled at the sight of her healing wounds. She smiled at the group before her and gave a reassuring nod.
Hours passed and all four had fallen asleep. Henry still in Regina's bed nuzzled in her neck. While Rumple had taken a comfortable chair from the hallway and slept in a seated position. Snow sat on the edge of Regina's bed with her head placed on the swiveling food tray, while Emma took her normal position with her feet on Regina's bed. A slumber captivating everything rose, as night fell upon the group of hopeful souls.
Darkness use to be my soothing pleasure and now an uncontrollable fear is filling every cave in my body. I'm awake but I'm not alive. My wounds may have healed and my mind may have been awaken but my soul has disappeared. It's no longer a part of me, merely a distant memory of the control I once possessed over it. A body without a soul, a mind without a will, a life without a breath is the broken shell he has left of me. And for this; , now fear is all I know and breathing is but a desolate trait I once upon a time use to own.
Regina lay awake remembering everything that had happened, everything that had led her to the bed she now occupied. But she also remembered every sentence, every word, along with every syllable that Emma and Henry had uttered over the past months. She didn't want to move having Henry laying on her was a joy she needed to take in, she knew the worse was coming so she needed to absorb this as much as she could. She looked around the room and a small grin formed on her face Emma looked exhausted but she was there, Rumple was out into a sea of sleep but his presence made her feel comfortable, she never believed he'd do so much for her. Her eyes peered to the end of her bed where Snow slept. She was immediately suprised, she felt no hate towards the women that had done this. Somehow watching her sleep gave her piece. She new what had occured, wasn't really Snows fault she had never told her of her father's horrors, therefore it just wasn't Snows fault she thought to herself.
"Your awake". Emmas voice whispered as she stood face to face with Regina. Tears flooded her face as she put her mouth to Reginas forehead.
"I am, don't wake up Henry, he must be exhausted".
"Don't wake up Henry? Regina all he wants is for you to wake up, he's been sleeping like that for days, we have to wake up Henry".
Regina looked down at her sleeping son, his proximity calming her.
"Henry, wake up honey" Regina whispered into Henrys ear while cupping his face with her hand.
"Mom? Moooommmmm!, I knew it would work I knew it". He threw himself over Regina who cried a little in pain.
" Oh my god! Mom I'm sorry, did I hurt you?".
"No, sweety you didn't hurt me, I'm happy your here".
"Of course, I'm here I'm always here, I only left to go to school and to sleep sometimes, and we'll occasionally to shower, but only when it was absolutely necessary".
Regina smiled at him holding him tight.
"I know henry, I could hear you the whole time, I'm very proud of your grades".
"I told you she could hear us Emma I told you".
Emma nodded at him with a huge smile.
Snow got up from the bed and made her way over to the corner of the room She grabbed her face with both hands and slid down the wall and began to sob.
"Can everyone give me and Snow a minute alone. " Regina asked politely.
"Um... Regina she didn't mean...". Emma got cut off
"A minute with Snow please, I promise everything will be fime, I ask for a minute". Regina said calmly
Emma nodded and motioned over to Henry, he got off the bed and exited behind Emma.
"Glad your awake deary". Rumple uttered as he walked out.
Sobs flew out of Snows throat as she continued kneeled on the floor.
"Well dear, I'm not sure I can get up so maybe you can come sob a bit closer".
Snow slid back up the wall as slowly as she had gone down. She walked over to the chair next to Reginas bed as slowly as she could. She used the palm of her hand to wipe the tears from her face.
"Why are you crying Snow? I think I'm owed at least an explanation for your tears".
"I'm crying because your awake! ".
"So the fact that I've woken up, is so saddening that your in tears, because somewhere deep down inside you wished you never had to confront this? ".
"Regina no... I'm crying because your awake and I was beginning to lose hope that I'd ever be able to tell you how sorry I am, how much I regret what I did, and how unintentionally wrong I was. I'm crying because I'm happy your alive, I'm crying because... because until this happened I hadn't realized how much I care about you, somehow I always hurt you even though it's the last thing I'd ever want. Regina...I am sooo sorry. I really didn't know I didn't know anything, I am simply an ignorant child who's love for her father blinded her from reality.. I'm so s..." Her rambling began to sounds unclear.
Regina cut her off.
"I know that you didn't know Snow, I know that if you really wanted to hurt me or even kill me you would have found a much easier way. I know that you had no idea, I do know that, but I need you to know, that this changes nothing. I still love Emma. I don't love her as a punishment towards you, I would never hurt her. I genuinely and truly love her, I need you to understand that falling in love with my arch nemesis daughter was never something I could have planned for nor something I would have chosen. The truth is I tried to escape it for a long time, but I love her and theres no way in hell that you or your father or anyone can stop that. She loves me and if you love her as much as I know you do, then you'll accept it".
Snows eyes widened as she took a long deep breath.
"Regina.. I was waiting for you to pull my heart out and crush it, or for a fireball to pin me to the wall behind me. Why are you not plotting my death, why are you speaking to me like I deserve any kind of kindness from you?".
Regina paused for a moment and then swallowed.
"Because this...This fued we've held on to for so long has to end somewhere. It seems that we got too caught up in defeating eachother that we never realized we were only defeating ourselves. I know you wouldn't have been able to live with yourself if I had died, which made me realize you dying would hurt me not to mention if it was by my hand. I love Emma and Henry and they need you, and I think it's time for us to put the past behind us and start again...you didn't know Snow and that's why I can forgive you".
The tears welling in Reginas eyes tugged at Snows insides. A vulnerable Regina was a sight that had never been demonstrated to Snow in her lifetime. She had to admit that this women had changed. Three months of her life had been lost at Snows hand and she didn't even blink red. Snow stood up and locked eyes with Regina. Both women had eyes filled by tears, tears of years of torment and pain, tears of years filled of hatred and anger, but ultimately tears of years filled and fueled by love. Snow lowered her hand to hold Reginas. She lowered her head and placed it on Reginas hand to kiss it. A smile on her face led her to kiss Reginas forehead.
"I guess we were always meant to be family, I'm just so sorry that it took this for me to realize something so apparently obvious".
"It's time to forget Snow, today we reach a new platform, it wasn't your fault it was his, forgive yourself, as I have".
"Regina, I only know what Rumple has told me, but somehow I need to hear from you, I know that it's hard for you to ever relive what happened all those years ago and you've already had to, but how will I ever confront him without knowing the truth?".
Regina turned her head away from Snow and looked at the machine that was hooked up to her chest. She bit the inside of her mouth and closed her eyes.
"There's nothing that I could say that could change who you believed your father to be, I don't think that it is necessary to go back to that, I don't need you to hate him Snow I hate him enough for the both of us".
Snow reached over and grabbed Reginas face and turned Reginas eyes to face her own.
"There's nothing you couldn't say that would make me hate him any less. I know enough to want him to regret everything, some how still there's things I can't believe, things I can't believe I didn't notice. Things that I can't remember if they are memories or simply memories of self imagined memories. I can recall many things but not piece them truly together. Like the week after he...forced you to marry him, I came to your door and asked you to go horse back riding with me, and you yelled for me to go away, and I didn't see you for a week. Should I have known?".
Reginas skin turned a pale shade of grey. Her eyes widened at the memory of that week. She took her face out of Snows grasp and looked away.
"You were a little girl, how could you possibly remember that, how...how could you possibly...". Reginas voice cracked as she asked the question.
"Be cause I hated you, that was the first time you went from being Regina to my evil step mother, to the women who treated me like I was less then a princess to the women who made me feel unworthy of her".
Reginas face turned slowly and reached Snows gaze. The tears left a trail on her cheek as they disappeared into her hospital gown.
" You were never unworthy of my love Snow. I was unworthy of your presence. I lost myself in the life that had been chosen for me and I neglected the only person who truly loved me, and for that I am sorry, evil overcame the person I once was and it wasn't your fault. My demise was at the hand of your father and my mother".
"I should have known, it's just that you were so beautiful you were everything I wanted to be, I couldn't have my queens perfect imagine shattered. I saw what I wanted to see".
"You saw what you should have seen, you were a child, knowing the truth would have destroyed you, and as much as I wanted someone to know someone to help me, as much as I wanted you to walk in on it, I'm glad you never did. I'm glad Snow, you would have never survived it, and today I'm nothing but glad".
Snow gasped when she realized how serious Regina was. All these years they had wanted eachother dead, and finally all they wanted was to spare the others feelings.
"So your never going to tell me, I'm just going to have to believe whoever I want?".
The truth was that Regina couldn't talk about it for so many years she wanted to throw it in Snows face, and now that she could her voice was failing.
"I'll make you a deal, help me get out of this gown, and into something clean, you can see for yourself, I never want to talk about it...ever.. I can't talk about it Snow, but I think you can help me change".
Snow looked at Regina confusion flooding her face but she nodded in agreement unsure of what Regina was doing. She knew that Leopold had hurt her she could see the scars on her neck. Nonetheless she agreed, she helped Regina out of bed slowly helping her maintain her composure. This would be the first time that Regina needed Snow. It was unlike any other feeling Snow had ever experienced she wasn't sure how she felt about it, the women who she has always viewed as the most powerful women alive, was about to reveal a weakness, she wasn't sure she could fathom such a thing.
Regina got to her feet and looked directly into Snows eyes. Without being able to stop it tears rolled down her face like a solemn river. Snow could see the pain in her eyes, but struggled to understand. As Regina turned her back towards Snow she handed her a clean gown. Snow reached Reginas shoulders and began to unfasten the clips that held the gown on her. Every snap made Reginas knees buckle underneath her as she held on tightly to the bed infront of her. As the gown dropped to the floor. Snow gasped for air at the site infront of her. She froze.. She stood behind Regina like time wasn't moving. Regina closed her eyes knowing exactly what Snow was feeling. She looked up at the ceiling hoping that time would once again begin, and that she would never have to think of this in her future.
Snow stood in silence, she didn't move, she wouldn't cry, she couldn't speak. The site of Reginas back took her breath away, there was no use in trying to grasp it the air had dissipated along with every memory of her father she had ever held dear. Scars surrounded every inch of Reginas back, years of pain recorded in hundreds of marks scattered abundantly and mercilessly across her once evil queens body.
Regina couldn't take it anymore. She let out a small cough hoping it would pull Snow back into the room. Snow lowered her head and closed her eyes trying to regain some kind of composure. She reached for the gown she had placed beside her and placed it over Regina, still gapping at what she had seen.
"I wanted to make sure you guys were ok". Emmas voice spoke from the doorway.
Regina turned quickly petrified that Emma would see her. She smiled covering her fear.
"Yes dear we are perfectly fine, we aren't quite finished give us one more minute we are almost done here".
Snow still looked directly at the floor in front of her holding the gown up covering Reginas back. Emma nodded and headed out. Snow clipped the gown back on Reginas back and couldn't move her hands from her shoulders. Silence once again overcame them. Snow turned Regina to face her and didn't even look at her she just pulled her in for an embrace.
"I won't talk about it, but I need to know something, how is it Emma hasn't seen this, it's obvious she hasn't by your reaction to her presence".
"No she doesn't know, and she won't because in all these years you are the only person that has ever seen that, because I had to tell someone and because after all these years someone finally asked".
"She loves you Regina you can't hide it from Emma".
"Listen Snow don't think for a second that because you know something about me you hold any power, this is my cross to bare".
"Emma...Henry you guys can come back in now".
Emma walked in followed by a enthusiastic Henry who climbed back on to Reginas bed.
"What happened to your neck Henry? , And Emma what happened to yours? ". Regina exclaimed in fear of what Leopold had done".
" Well it was part of Rumples awakening potion, the people that love you had to give a piece of themselves, so we did". Emma explained
"You let our son cut himself Emma?".
"No she didn't it was my decision and it worked and it was worth it".
Regina pulled the bandage off her sons neck and widened her eyes.
"I can't believe the only available adult made such poor choices".
Regina lifted her hands to Henry s neck and a white light resonated from her hands, within seconds the cut was gone not even a scar showing that it had ever existed. She turned to Emma and did the same.
"Henry it's getting late, why don't you go home with Snow, you do have school tomorrow". Regina reasoned.
"You just woke up and your already so bossy". Henry teased.
He gave his mother a kiss on the cheek and then another on the forehead, then after a short pause kissed her cheek again finishing off with a light hug.
"I love you so much, I thought I had lost you, and would never be able to tell you how much a love you mom". Henry whispered lightly into Reginas ear.
He sat up and leaned towards Emma giving her a big hug and kiss.
"I'll see you guys tomorrow after school, love you guys".
He grabbed his backpack and walked out the door. Snow said her goodbyes never taking her eyes off Regina. She walked over to her and leaned in while fusing her into a hug. She made her way out the door leaving a room occupied by Emma and Regina.
Before Regina could speak Emmas lips touched hers momentarily taking her breath soaring through the sky. A smile formed on the corner of Reginas mouth realizing she had invisioned for months this very scenario. Regina moved over in her bed and patted the space left next to her motioning for Emma to lay beside her. Emma did as she was prompted and immediately was embraced by Reginas arms around her neck. A passionate kiss filled the space between them. Tears formed in both faces, smiles appeared on both expressions, while love was captured in both beating hearts.