Tomorrow at breakfast, Mafala, after minutes of being frantically whispered to by Nabulungi, finally reaches his breaking point.
"I am tired of discussing this!"
"I am not!" Nabulungi shouts back. From the shock on both of their faces, Nabulungi has rarely, if ever, raised her voice to her father. Arnold hurries to Nabulungi's side; Kevin approaches more liesurely.
Nabulungi glances about, sees most of her friends and fellow villagers watching and muttering among themselves, and falls silent.
"Child," says Sister Damisi, "what is this about?"
Her hand finds Arnold's. "It is nothing," she says shyly. "I am sorry to disturb every—"
"Oh, enough bullshit," says Gotswana. "What is wrong?"
Nabulungi shares a look with Arnold, who gulps but, slowly, nods. She takes a deep, shaky breath. "Ah, Baba will not let me and Elder Cunningham get married."
Some villagers shake their heads; a few shrug and turn back to their meals. Kevin's heart soars. Maybe if more people let them know how wrong they are, she and Arnold will see the light.
"I just...I really love her," Arnold says. Kevin heard every possible variation on that theme last night and just manages not to roll his eyes.
"Mafala," says Sister Damisi, "stop being such an asshole."
Mafala stares at her. "What?"
"Let the child be happy! Heavenly Father knows, we have all known our share of sadness." Gotswana says, "Amen!", and many other villagers nod.
Mafala gestures to Nabulungi, who frowns at him, and Arnold, who flinches. "Look at them! Too young, from two different worlds, and too in love to think. Prophet," he nods to Arnold, "how will you bring my daughter to America?"
Woah, thinks Kevin, I didn't even think of that one.
Arnold blinks. "Um. I've got money saved up!"
"Enough for a plane ticket to the other side of the world?" Oh, he's good.
"Yes!" Liar.
"And Nabulungi," Mafala says, "tell me what you will do when you get there. How you will live?" Yes! Score one for Mafala!
Nabulungi shrugs. "It is America, Baba. There are always jobs."
"Jobs in a recession? And will those jobs go to white girls, or the black girl fresh out of the jungle? That is what you will be in America." Well, jeez, that's pretty mean... But whatever works.
Nabulungi sets her chin. "Let them. Elder Cunningham—Arnold—does not see me that way, and that is all I need to know. Even the lowest job in America is still better than starving here." Darn, that's a good point.
"And our president's black!" Arnold adds. "We don't have racism anymore!"
Mafala snorts, and Kevin has to admit that maybe white people don't get to make that call.
Mutumbo speaks up. "Pretty fucking arrogant, Mafala, to think you know how the future will go. As chapter 12 verse 19 of the book says, 'The good things do not always soften the bad things, but the bad things do not necessarily spoil the good things and make them unimportant.' Jesus Christ said this to Amy Pond, mother of the Great River, and I believe it. Will you say your daughter cannot have this good thing because bad things may happen?"
Gotswana claps and some of the villagers shout, "Praise Christ!" and "LL&P!"
But look at them! Kevin opens his mouth to set them straight. They probably won't even last our mission! It's just...lust! She doesn't even really understand him, not the way I do!
He shuts his mouth. Kevin wills his strength into Mafala, who looks like he's doubting himself. Then he shakes his head and glowers at everyone who stands against him.
"Oh, fuck off to hell, all of you. She is not your daughter, she is mine, and that means she has to respect my wishes."
"I do, Baba!" She wipes at her eyes. "I know you only say these things because you love me so much. And I love you!" She drops Arnold's hand and approaches her father. "I always will, even if I love Elder Cunningham."
Mafala softens, and Kevin remembers that his daughter is all he has left in this world. Kevin's heart slams against his chest. Come on, be strong...
Nabulungi reaches out to him, grabbing his hand. "Baba, please, I beg you to give us your blessing."
No!
Mafala frowns slightly, then sighs. "We will talk about this later tonight, my dove."
"Oh, come on!" Gotswana complains, but Mafala ignores the harangues of the villagers and gets back in line for breakfast.
"LL&P, Nabulungi," says Sister Damisi, kissing her forehead.
"We will pray for you," says Effu Kimbay. She doesn't even glance at Kevin, though he's standing not too far from Nabulungi. Kevin opens his mouth to say something to her, but can't think of anything before she leaves to take her seat.
When only Arnold and Kevin are nearby, Nabulungi mutters, "If he says no, we will take one of the General's jeeps and go to Kampala ourselves. Elder Price and Gotswana will be our witnesses."
Kevin's skin prickles. "Um, wouldn't that be stealing from the General?" His ass cheeks clench. He can just imagine the General's punishment for stealing...
"The jeeps are for the church, he said so himself." Kevin's breath gusts out of him. Right—the General's one of us now. "Not," she adds quickly, "that you have to come if it would make you uncomfortable."
"Let's just hope it doesn't come to Plan B."
Rob and Eric are making their way through the dining hall toward their group. From the way Rob is smiling, Kevin isn't optimistic that their district leader is going to shut this bad idea down.
"Well!" Rob says. "Congratulations, both of you!"
"We meant to tell you as well," Nabulungi says apologetically. "Only...we were distracted."
Rob offers to rearrange companions for today if that would make her feel easier; Nabulungi reluctantly declines. As they talk, Kevin notes the reactions of the other ex-Mormons. Elder Church is shaking his head and speaking intently to Elder Neeley; Elders Davis and Michaels are looking at their group uneasily. It's a lot to take. Kevin sympathizes.
Kevin throws himself too much into the day's proselytizing. He doesn't let people ask questions, breaking one of the first rules he learned at the missionary training centre, and he doesn't listen—the death-knell of any missionary.
"Tomorrow is a latter day," Arnold mumbles, with the day not even half-over.
"Yeah."
As they always do at noon, they take a break, gulping down bottled water and eating energy bars. The street is deserted except for stray dogs sleeping in the shade of buildings. The nearest stray dog is a black, jackal-sized creature with white paws and the biggest, saddest brown eyes Kevin has ever seen. It has no swollen growths or runny eyes or open wounds like some of the other dogs. Kevin crouches down and pours some water into his cupped hand, offering it to the little guy.
"She can't love the prophet and not me," Arnold says out of the blue. "I mean, she knows we didn't get eaten by lions and come back to life."
Kevin feels more alert than he has all day. "You have to admit, your story isn't the average 'boy-meets-girl' story. I mean, you gave her hope, faith, a new life. That's a pretty powerful bond. Can it survive a relationship—a marriage? It's probably what Elder Hatimbi is thinking." To the dog, he croons, "Heeeere boy, hey boy..."
The dog sniffs at him but doesn't move as Arnold says, "But maybe it's a good kind of powerful? I mean, look how she stood up for us in front of her dad earlier! She's such a Gryffindor."
"What's that?" The water is spilling from his hand. He pours more in. "Hey, pup. You want some water?" The dog's tail thumps.
"One of the Houses from Harry Potter—I've been thinking about that orphan verse." Arnold sounds relaxed and excited as he continues, which makes Kevin smile. "They're the house of the brave. I think you're a Slytherin. They're driven and ambitious. And that's you all over! Only you're ambitious for Jesus, not worldly stuff. Sure, in the books, Slytherins are kind of evil—and yeah, their symbol is a snake—but you'd be one of the good ones. If you were a British wizard."
"Nice fresh water, little guy, come ooooon... And, gee, thanks for thinking I'm not evil..."
Arnold pats his shoulder in commiseration. "I'm a Hufflepuff! They get put down a bit in the books, too. The books are so pro-Gryffindor it gets a little silly at times."
The dog puts its head down, unenticed. "Maybe I'll bring a bowl next time," Kevin decides, pulling a Kleenex from his pocket and drying off his wet hand. Instinctively, he checks their placement list. It's blank. They should have placements. Heck, they should've had two or three follow-up sessions by now. He runs his hands through his hair with a sigh.
Arnold takes a long sip of bottled water. "Oh, hey, listen, about the conversation you might've heard between me and Nabulungi the other day..."
Kevin feels a sudden tightening in the skin over his temples. "Mmhm?" How is the church doing in Yunna anyway?
"It really wasn't right, to gossip about you like that, and I'm sorry."
Kevin manages a brief smile. "Thanks." Mafala and Nabulungi must be having a follow-up with their placement... Rob and Eric mentioned they had a follow-up today, the General was particularly proud of his two placements yesterday, his first ever...
"I didn't, you know, tell her anything. About you."
Kevin keeps calculating how the church is doing. Anything to avoid the nasty little thought hissing, Sexless freak. "Ohhhh-kay, pal, I think we've had enough of a break. We're set to be dead last when it comes to converts and," he thumps Arnold's shoulder, "Kevin Price and the prophet of the world's newest, hottest religion do not come in dead last!"
Arnold puts his half-eaten energy bar into his backpack with a sigh, muttering something that sounds like, "So Slytherin."
They actually do get a placement after this, from a very unexpected source: the cashier at the Internet café.
As they pay for their bottled water, the young man in an old Guns N Roses T-shirt says, "Okay, I have to ask: what on earth do you guys actually do?"
The question is so unexpected that Kevin loses a few seconds as he switches gears. "We're spreading the word of the Book of Arnold."
"You're selling a book?"
"Not selling—it's free!"
The young man looks amused. "Can't be that good if it's free."
"I think you'll find a few of your neighbours in Kigali who say otherwise."
"Hah! Kigali people know how to read?"
"YES THEY DO—" Arnold snaps. Kevin steps neatly between the cashier and him. This isn't the first time he's had to do this; Kigali seems synonymous with "hick" in Yunna. Some Yunna-ites seem surprised to hear that the village is still around; they just assume that General Butt-Fucking Naked or some other warlord wiped them out years ago.
"I'd love to give you a little taste of what they're reading about, if you've got the time."
The cashier glances around. His only other customers are Brian Church and Elder Neeley; Brian is pacing, while Neeley sits in front of a computer, drumming his fingers on the keyboard anxiously. Just as Kevin feels like he should go talk to the two, the cashier says, "Eh, I'm not going anywhere. Why not?"
He gets the speech. He doesn't ask any questions, but when Arnold offers him a book, he accepts. Kevin is surprised when he agrees to have a follow-up session with them next week at the same time, though his reasoning becomes clear when he says, "Sure, it's pretty dead here then." Grinning, Kevin marks his name—Zulu Abeni—and the time of his appointment on their placement sheet.
With good news comes bad: Brian Church and Elder Neeley line up behind them to pay what they owe the café, and neither of them look happy. Brian stares ahead blankly. Neeley is a surprise: the anxious, shy missionary looks flat out angry.
"What's up, Elders?" Kevin asks.
"Nothing," says Brian.
"It's not nothing!" snaps Elder Neeley. "Elder Church tried what you said, Elder Cunningham, and his bishop called him a liar!"
"Oh no," whispers Arnold. Kevin instinctively puts a hand on his shoulder.
"He called us a cult!" Elder Neeley rages. "Said we'd been brainwashed!"
"He said," Brian says heavily as he pays the cashier, "that we were sons of perdition."
Kevin sucks in his breath, suddenly very grateful for his bishop and his parents, who haven't expressed anything so harsh.
"And we are," Brian continues, gaze going to Kevin, once a shining example of the Mormon faith. "Aren't we?"
Kevin knows he should say no. He's not a Mormon anymore. But everything his rational mind knows is blocked by the bone-deep chill on hearing "sons of perdition." We knew God and turned our backs—we denied the sun while it shone! For us the outer darkness and Satan's angels, not the kingdoms of glory!
"No, we're not," says Arnold firmly, stepping toward Brian and Elder Neeley, snapping Kevin out of his paralysis. "That's the old doctrine. We're the new." His confidence falters. "I'm—I'm sorry about your bishop and what he said. If you want, we can all pray—"
Brian animates enough to laugh bitterly. Up close, Kevin can see just how tired he looks. "Sure. That's been helpful. Hey, maybe Jesus will send Spider-Man to help us out." With a snort, he turns and walks to the door.
Elder Neeley grinds his teeth. "That stupid bishop!" He looks pleadingly at Arnold. "Can we post the video now?"
Arnold gulps. "Uh, I don't think that's a good—"
"Mason," snaps Brian.
Mason Neeley frowns in disappointment at Kevin and Arnold before he leaves.
"Tell you what," Zulu Abeni says, chuckling, "you can come by tomorrow if you explain what that was all about."
Arnold wheels on the cashier. "GIVE ME THAT BOOK BACK!"
Startled, Zulu looks to Kevin, who's just as surprised. After a moment, he hands it over.
"IF you want to learn more about the Church of Arnold, THEN YOU CAN HAVE IT BACK, BUT NOT IF YOU JUST WANT SOME DRAMA!"
Arnold storms off.
"I'll talk to him," Kevin says, as smoothly as he can—which isn't very. Zulu looks wary. Kevin gives him a confident smile and follows Arnold out. As he leaves, he can just hear Zulu mutter, "Crazy Americans."
"Don't say it," Arnold grumbles when Kevin approaches. "The guy wasn't really interested and you know it."
Kevin sighs. "You're right. Doesn't mean he deserved to be shouted at, though, does it?" He realizes only after he's done speaking that he's using his older-brother-lecture voice.
"Yes it does. You heard what he said about Kigali!"
"If he tells two people about the crazy shouting Americans and they tell two people and they tell two people..."
Arnold sighs. "Fine." They return to the café and apologize. Zulu accepts, but doesn't ask them for another Book of Arnold. Reluctantly, Kevin crosses him off their list.
Kevin asks if he could buy a bowl from him. Zulu agrees, charging him more than Kevin suspects any plastic bowl is worth, and Kevin fills it with water and leaves it by the side of the street. Maybe when the day gets cooler, the little black dog will drink from it.
Kevin gets set straight when Arnold mentions on the jeep-ride back, "Elder Price tried to get this dog to drink water from his hand—"
Shock and concern or teasing from the villagers follows. "You might not want to use shaving cream, or we will think you are foaming at the mouth!" from Effu. "Oh, Elder Price, that thing did not touch you, did it?" from Sister Damisi. "Why would you waste water? The dog is just going to get killed during the next cull anyway," from Mutumbo.
"Yeah," he admits readily, "it was pretty dumb of me." Inside, he feels hollow.
When they get back, Nabulungi immediately seeks out Arnold, her expression troubled. Rain is pouring down; she huddles under his umbrella.
"Persuading Baba is not going very well," she reports. "Now Baba says that I would be a good choice to help shepherd the church in Uganda when you leave. He makes too much of me, as he always has," she says fondly, though she can't even smile. Her gaze falls to the wet dirt at her feet.
"I should go help get dinner started," Kevin says quickly. He helps Elders Church and Davis peel yams and strip the meat off their lone, tiny chicken, which they all throw in a boiling pot with some rice.
Arnold pushes his food about his plate moodily. Rob McKinley and Eric Thomas have a conversation about the Transformers movies, which, from the glances they send Arnold's way, they hope he'll join in on. They share a worried look when he doesn't.
Nabulungi sits quietly beside her father. Her friends talk to her and she gives brief, one-word answers. Mafala catches Kevin looking at him and gives him a tiny nod. Kevin has to work to keep a smile off his face. Perfect. He lets his thoughts turn to other matters that cropped up during the day, and leaves dinner early for a little religious study.
Arnold joins him an hour later, talking as he enters. Kevin, busy writing in his journal and reading the book in front of him, doesn't even look up. "I kept trying to get a sec alone with Nabulungi, but her dad was always there and...woah." Kevin finally looks up and realizes just how many books he has spread out on his bed.
"Wow, buddy." Arnold tries to smile but doesn't quite make it. "You haven't touched your journal in forever. Or...or the Book of Mormon. Um, how are things?"
Kevin grins reassuringly. "Great—they're great. I think I've pegged us in the terrestrial kingdom of heaven."
"Oh. Okay." Arnold's face scrunches up as if he's trying to remember.
Kevin flips to the right page in his journal. "Doctrines and Covenants 76:75—'These are they who are a honorable men of the earth, who were blinded by the craftiness of men.' And 76: 'These are they who receive of his glory, but not of his fulness.' We're serving God here, in our way. Pretty sure that's what the book means by 'honorable'. Sure, it's not the celestial kingdom—no new name and white stone for us—but it's not the outer darkness! Ha!"
Arnold looks completely lost. "And this is about...?"
"Elder Church! If he believes he's a son of perdition, of course he's going to leave us. But if I can show him we're part of the terrestrial kingdom, maybe he'll think twice. You've told me before, it's all in what kind of stories you believe. He believes the Book of Mormon's stories?" Kevin slaps his journal triumphantly, feeling very much Elder Kevin Price, member of the Aaronic and Melchizedek priesthoods. "Even the Book of Mormon says we're still good!"
Arnold sags against the doorframe, hands covering his face as he moans.
Kevin is up from his bed and at his side so quickly he can't remember moving. "Buddy?" He licks at dry lips. "What's up?"
"I completely forgot," Arnold whispers, horrified. His voice rises in panic: "I FORGOT!" Kevin pulls him inside and shuts the door.
"I forgot," Arnold repeats in a moan. "All about Elder Church. Even you—with that cute dog—I could've helped you give it water! I didn't! I just...I can't think, I can't think..."
Kevin grips him by the shoulders and stares into his eyes, steady and soothing. "Elder Cunningham, we almost got a placement today because of your help."
"No, we lost a placement because of me..."
"Because you realized he probably would have done more harm than good in our organization. That was smart. Clever."
His face is so miserable that Kevin expects a few tears or some sniffling, but there's none. After a moment, Arnold whispers, "She doesn't want to leave Uganda."
Kevin winces in sympathetic pain. He's found something so terrible that he's beyond tears.
"I'm so sorry, Elder Cunningham. Are you...still engaged?"
"I—I guess?" He shrugs helplessly. "This is like the third Matrix movie all over again...I just can't figure it out!"
Kevin mentally sighs—Brian Church will have to wait until tomorrow. He gestures to Arnold's bed and they sit side by side. "Why don't we go over exactly what she said."
As Kevin suspected, it's not as bad as Arnold thinks. Nabulungi simply admitted that she worries about how Mafala will adjust to living without her. What if he succumbs to AIDS while she's in the U.S.? How would she feel if she couldn't see her father's last days? There's nothing in there about her staying in Uganda—not really.
When Arnold finishes recounting, Kevin sighs heavily.
"Pretty bad, isn't it?" Arnold says bleakly.
"I'm," Kevin pauses, "well, I'm...I'm sure you'll work through it." He gives Arnold a tiny smile, quickly extinguished by concern.
With a moan, Arnold slumps against him, resting his cheek on Kevin's shoulder. Arnold needs some form of physical contact on a good day; now, he must be desperate. Kevin slings his arm around Arnold's shoulders, squeezing softly, as if he might break apart.
After a deep sigh, Arnold murmurs, "I can't can't can't thank you enough. Poor Elder Church. I don't deserve him in my church if I can't even do anything for him."
We prayed for him just last night! Kevin wants to protest. No one person can solve another person's problems—only God can, and sometimes He needs time to work. Kevin just manages to keep his lips closed. Love has to hurt sometimes.
"And, yesterday...remember when Nabulungi asked Mafala to go to her mom's and brothers' grave, and he said no? I thought exactly what Mafala said I was thinking: that maybe I could put a verse about visiting graves into the Book of Arnold. The Book is bigger than just what I want. I know that but...I still wanted to.
"You're my Riker, Elder Price—my number one. I need you, and I'm gonna keep needing you until...whatever happens between me and Nabulungi works itself..."
There's the sound of a commotion from the living-room, and footsteps approaching the dormitories at a run.
"...out," Arnold finishes, either not hearing it or not caring enough to lift his head from Kevin's shoulder.
Their door suddenly bursts open. It's Nabulungi, sopping wet, panting and smiling. Kevin's heart sinks. Arnold leaps up—pushing Kevin away in his eagerness, which hurts—and kisses her on the mouth.
Kevin looks aside. Some of his books fell off his bed when he moved to help Arnold, so he starts picking them up, keeping his back to Arnold and Nabulungi.
"NBA—" Arnold clears his throat, "—uh, Nabulungi!—I love you so mu—"
"I hope so, or we are marrying under very false pretenses!"
"S—so, we're still...?"
"Why, of course!" She sounds shocked. "How could you think—?"
"I don't know, it was just—"
"It is my fault. I re-read the Book! It told me I was worrying too much about the future. 'Consider the lilies of the field. They do not labour or spin, but not even Galadriel was clothed so finely.'"
That verse—except for the Lord of the Rings reference—was one of Kevin's contributions.
Kevin grips The Biblical Roots of Mormonism so hard his knuckles turn white. Nabulungi keeps talking, but he can't hear her over the howl trapped inside him. He can't recall the last time he felt this angry. The closest he came was anger at God and the Mormon faith after the incident with the General. It feels like rage is in the air he breathes, in his bloodstream.
I really need to start drinking coffee again. On the heels of that thought comes, This isn't because of coffee. Something is wrong with me.
He hears Nabulungi's voice suddenly cut off. Glancing behind, he sees her gaze dart away from him, back to Arnold, and her voice picks up again. She had a clear view of his clenched hand.
And now Nabulungi knows it, too.
"...if I can borrow a towel?" she finishes, looking sheepish, rubbing her upper arms.
"Let me," Kevin says. He avoids looking at Nabulungi as he passes her, afraid of what will show on his face.
From the living room, all the Elders are listening in, though only Rob is watching them, looking concerned. The rest look embarrassed, judging by their blushes and staring anywhere other than at Nabulungi. Kevin understands: it's a rather intimate conversation to have overheard.
He hands Nabulungi her towel and she quickly wraps it around herself. She turns to Rob and shyly says, "I also wanted to ask if I might stay on the mission's couch for the night. Baba and I fought, and...some time apart would be welcome."
"Say no more," says Rob. "Of course, you're welcome to stay." The other ex-Mormons look much more normal than they did a moment ago. They meet her gaze easily. What's up with everyone...?
Replaying the moment, Kevin realizes that Nabulungi is covered up now and she wasn't a moment ago. Wet fabric clinging to a girl's body is something a normal, red-blooded American guy notices. And Kevin didn't.
It bothers him, but after the day he's had, not very much.