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A Different Kind Of Love

Danny only left Matt's office once he had fallen asleep, caused by a mixture of exhaustion from the last few days and the alcohol. He glanced at his watch seeing that there was only 40 minutes until the show aired. He was slowly running out of ideas on how to help Matt. Every time he thought that he was making some kind of improvement, something else always happened. He hated how much his friend was hurting and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He was the one that always looked after Matt, no matter what it was. Whether it was when he was working too hard and needed to just go home and get some rest or by standing by him when they worked here before and Matt was fired.

He walked into the NBS box, smiling when he saw Jordan sat holding Nicky.

"Hey." He said, walking over and sitting next to her, stretching out his finger to Nicky and putting his other arm on the back of the couch.

"Hey." She smiled at him.

"How did you like the show?" He asked but his eyes not leaving the baby, who had grabbed hold of his finger.

"It was funny." She replied.

"Good."

She watched him for a moment before speaking again. "Are you going to tell me what's going on?"

"What do you mean?" He looked up at her.

"I saw you going into your office to do the slaughter with Cal."

"Um, yeah...so?"

"Where was Matt?"

"Jordan, you said you were only coming down here to watch." He sighed. "Don't worry about the show..."

"I'm not worrying about the show." She assured him. "I'm worrying about Matt."

"He's fine."

"Danny!" She gave him a look. "Why wasn't he at the slaughter?"

"Trust me, okay."

"I do trust you." She replied. "But I want to know."

"Why?"

"Because in case you haven't noticed, he's your best friend and since we've gotten together I have got to know him too." She stated. "He's like family to you, so that makes him family to me too."

Danny was surprised by what she said but was happy she felt like that.

"So, are you going to tell me?"

"He was drunk."

"So? He had a few drinks..." She shrugged. "Its not that much of a big deal considering everything that has happened."

"This wasn't a few drinks... this was a whole bottle of vodka in a little under an hour." Danny sighed, rubbing his eyes. "He's really messed up."

"Maybe... maybe he should talk to someone." Jordan suggested.

"He won't."

"Why not?"

"Because he hates talking about his feelings." Danny replied. "It won't work. I know it won't."

"Well, he needs to do something."

"I know..."

"Maybe a few weeks of being with Gracie will help."

"I don't know." Danny replied. "Gracie isn't really the problem. He's missing Jess."

"I know but surely with Gracie being around it will help remind him of her."

"I think that's why he doesn't want to bond with her."

"What?"

"He's blaming himself... he think this has all happened because of what he's done."

"What has he done?"

"He kissed Harriet."

"What? When?"

"The day Jess was taken into hospital."

"And it was just a kiss?"

"Yeah but Jess had called him when he was with Harriet to tell him something didn't feel right." Danny explained. "He thinks he should have been there for her."

"That would explain him and Harriet avoiding each other."

"Yeah, I can't believe she never told me about this!"

"It wouldn't have really helped much if she had of done."

"Yes it would have... I could have made him understand that it wasn't his fault." Danny answered. "I could have helped him through this."

"You can still do that."

"But Gracie is coming home tomorrow...and I don't think he can cope with her... not yet."

"Oh." Jordan replied, not thinking of that.

"I don't know what to do." He whispered, looking at her.

In the time that she had known him she had never seen him look so lost before.

"We'll look after them."

"What?"

"They can move into our place for a while...until Matt's ready to do it on his own."

"Are you serious?" he asked.

"Yeah... But I won't be looking after two babies... and you got to remember Matt's her Dad...he's got to take care of Grace." She told him. "We'll just be there to make sure he's okay and if he needs us to help."

"Why are you doing this?" He asked curiously.

"Because I love you...and you love them... And so I do." Jordan smiled slightly.

"You're amazing." He whispered, pressing his lips against hers.

"I know that." She replied, causing him to laugh slightly. "Hey, there's 20 minute till we go on air... shouldn't you be working?"

"Nah, its okay...I'm on good terms with the boss."

She rolled her eyes at him but smiled when he leaned down and kissed the top of Nicky's head.

"Right, I'm going." He stood up. "I'll see you later."

"You will." She grinned at him again as he left.

XxXxX

"Harriet, can I talk to you?" Danny asked, walking over to her as she stood waiting with Tom and Simon to start the show.

"Yeah, what about?"

"Matt."

She sighed. "Danny, we're on in 5 minutes, can't it wait?"

"No." He took hold of her arm gently and led her away from everyone.

Tom looked over at Simon questionably to see if he knew what was going on but he just shrugged, just as confused as he was.

"Why didn't you tell me what happened between you two?" Danny asked.

"What do you mean?"

"You know what I mean!" Danny hissed. "You kissed him!"

"Oh, so he told you about that?" She hung her head slightly.

"Yes! Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because its between me and Matthew..." She started.

"Cut the crap! You've seen the state he's been in!" He exclaimed. "He thinks he's being punished... he thinks Jess is dead because of what happened."

"That's crazy... it was just a kiss."

"Well, he's in a crazy place right now." He replied. "Why the hell did you kiss him? You said you were going to back off!"

"It wasn't like that!" She exclaimed. "It wasn't as if I planned it! It just happened! One minute were talking, the next we were kissing!"

Danny sighed and ran his hands over his eyes. "I'm sorry for shouting but you should have told me."

"I know." She whispered. "He is... he is going to be okay, isn't he?"

"I don't know..." Danny replied. "But he needs his friends... I know that he's probably said some stuff to you but you know he doesn't mean it, right?"

"Yeah..." She nodded. "I was going to talk to him about it but I thought I should wait until everything had calm down."

"Good."

"Danny, you do realise that you can't do all this on your own."

"There's no one else..." He answered.

"I'll try talking to him after the show." She told him.

"You can't."

"Why?"

"Because he's asleep."

"It's Friday night."

"It's not a problem, he hasn't been sleeping a lot lately and he had a few drinks earlier..." He told her. "He's just fallen asleep."

"You mean, he's passed out." She corrected.

"Don't let it get out." Danny told her. "I'm dealing with it."

"Danny, you can't... not on your own." She stated.

"It's fine, listen you need to get going...the show is starting."

"Okay but please...please get some help." She told him as she walked towards the stage.

Danny sighed, knowing she was right but he couldn't give up...not yet.

XxXxX

The next day, Danny stood on the balcony that looked out over the stage. He had been stood there, watching as people crowded around baby Gracie. Matt had gone to pick her up from the hospital that morning and Danny assumed he'd go home but he didn't, he brought her into work with him. Now, he was sat with Andy and Darius whilst Lucy, Jeannie, Suzanne and Sam were playing with Grace.

When he had asked Matt to come and stay with him and Jordan, he thought he'd be grateful but he wasn't really bothered and just shrugged. He saw Jeannie starting to make up a bottle and then handed it to Lucy who was holding Grace and started to feed her.

Danny walked towards the stairs, this wasn't right. It should be Matt feeding her. He was her father... he hadn't even held her yet.

"Aw, man... why do women go all gaa gaa over babies?" Simon asked as he walked in with Harriet and Tom.

"Shut up." Jeannie glared at him.

"You want to hold her?" Lucy asked, Harriet.

"Um ..." Harriet looked over to Matt to see what his reaction was but he hadn't even stopped typing and the next thing she knew, Grace was in her arms. She looked down at her. She was so beautiful...She could see a lot of Jess in her but she could also see Matt. She defiantly had his eyes.

She was surprised when Danny appeared in front of her and took Grace off her. They all watched as he walked over to stand in front of Matt.

"She needs feeding." Danny told him.

"Lucy said she'd do it..." Not looking up from his laptop.

"No, you should be doing it."

"I'm working." He mumbled.

"No, you're not... from now on you're on leave." He told him.

"What?" He looked up.

"You're on leave." Danny repeated. "Take Grace home and be a father!"

"You can't make me go on leave."

"Matt."

"I'm sick of this." Matt stood up. "I'm sick of people telling me what to do...and how to feel."

"Don't you understand?" Danny asked. "You're a father now. Grace needs you."

"No, you don't understand! I don't want to be a father! I never have! You forcing it on me, isn't working!"

"Well, tough because you are! And she is already here! She didn't ask for this!"

"Neither did I!" He shouted. "I only stuck around to do the right thing! I only agreed to keep it because it was what Jess wanted!! And I loved her! She was what I wanted!! But now she's gone!!"

Everyone fell silent and the only sound was Grace's cries.

"And she's not coming back." Matt lowered his voice slightly and then gestured to Grace. "Every time I look at that I remember why she's not here."

They all watched stunned as Matt headed through the door before turning back to look at Danny.

"Shh... Its okay..." Danny whispered, bouncing Grace gently, holding her closely to him. Maybe he really did need help now.