"Chat, watch your nine!"
Chat Noir ducked under the flame that threatened to singe his hair. "What did we even do? We tipped the lady!"
"I think someone insulted her—"
"That scallop was perfect! I will not be compared to stupid Rene!"
"—scallops."
"Well, I'm a pretty good cat-erer if I do say so myself."
"Chat."
He laughed and deflected a lid with his baton. "Well, I know who we're not asking for Nino's wedding."
"I thought her scallops were pretty good. You know, for scallops."
"Trust in the scallops!"
"You know what they say: if you can't take the heat, get outta the kitchen!" Ladybug blocked another lid.
"LB, she's not in the kitchen. She's the Caterer. She's literally out of the kitchen."
"Shut up, Chat. I tried."
They screamed as a car got flung their way by the flames, dodging in opposite directions.
"It's in the tongs, Chat!" Ladybug ignored the pain in her back; she was almost certain that she'd been burned, but now was not the time to deal with it.
"On it!" He ducked between a few cars, eventually tackling the Caterer from behind. "LB, on your five!"
She caught the tongs and broke them. "Chat, it's not the tongs!"
"I've noticed that!"
"Dammit, Chat!"
The Caterer trapped him under a large lid despite his trying to prevent it.
"Now that's what I call french fries!"
"You're worse at puns than I am!" Ladybug hit her with the yoyo and yelled, "Let my boyfriend go!" I'm so gonna regret that later.
"Cataclysm!" Chat released himself from his prison. "Let's get her, LB."
"It's the spatula. Think we can get it?"
"Sure thing. I'll watch your six."
"Lucky Charm! A fire extinguisher?"
"Gotta go, Lady!"
"I'm—aah!" She pulled it on instinct, praying it would last long enough to get close. "We're almost there, Chat!"
"I have it!"
Ladybug caught it and broke it, purifying the butterfly as quickly as possible. "Miraculous Ladybug!"
They hugged each other again; it was quickly becoming the norm instead of the fist-bump.
"Ladybug, you said that Chat Noir was your boyfriend! How long has this been a thing? Is that why you were gone from Paris for so long?"
"Whoops! Look at the time! Gotta go!" The duo clung to each other as Ladybug swung them away and out of the reach of the reporters.
A/N: I hope you liked it! I'm really having fun writing this thing even though it was supposed to be a one shot. Yeah, it's a little plotless…oh well. I'm just one woman; there's only so much I can do! -wwot