(Set after "Reunion II". I own nothing.)
NOW THAT I AM LEAVING
My beloved Bail,
when I gave you those letters earlier today in my office, I really didn't think I would be writing a letter to you. I said goodbye to you in person, as I'd planned. I couldn't wish you farewell in writing. I knew a letter wouldn't and couldn't capture what I needed to get across to you.
But, now that I've left the task force and I'm preparing to leave you, I find myself compelled to write to you. To express my feelings more than I dared to in person. Please forgive me for my lack of courage.
At that moment in my office, I thought what I felt was simple. Chloe is the most important person in my life, and I need to do what is right by her. I need to take care of her, concentrate on her for the time being.
So I thought that I don't belong in the FBI while I take care of Chloe.
I thought I could leave.
But now, I know that I was wrong, because I already miss you. I probably could leave the FBI.
I can't leave you. See, I thought I didn't belong here, and that's probably true. But I do belong with you.
I love you. I knew I loved you the harrowing moment Newquay lied to me that you were dead.
I almost wish you'd asked me to stay. At the same time, I love that you didn't. I now know the depths of your love for me.
I'd give anything to be able to stay. You know I can't.
You also know that I believe in fate. It was my fate to fall in love with you. I have to believe that fate will also give us a chance to be together in the future.
Forgive my ramblings. It's 4.21 in the morning. I wish I could see you read this letter of mine. For the moment, though, I don't have the strength for that. Leaving you once tore me apart. Leaving you for the second time might kill me.
So, I'm going to count on fate to bring us together somewhere down the road.
After all, you are my fate. I love you.
Yours, Sam.