It was 2am when Kyle heard the truck pull up in the driveway. He hadn't bothered to go to bed, knowing he wouldn't be able to sleep until he saw for himself that his brother and his friend were okay. Now that they were here found he was excited to see them, he'd missed Ash's cheeky grin. But the man who stepped through the door wasn't the one who'd left. Something was different.
"I'm wrecked," Ash announced, heading for the couch. He sounded okay. Maybe Kyle was overthinking it, maybe he was just tired.
"You can take my bed," Kyle offered, sensing that Ash needed it more than he did. He didn't bother asking if they'd found Billie, the answer was clear enough.
"Thanks," Ash said automatically, diverting his course towards the bedroom. Kyle watched him disappear into the hallway, noticed the defeated slump of his shoulders and knew he couldn't leave it at that, so he followed.
Ash had flicked the bedside lamp on and a soft light filled the room. Kyle stopped in the doorway. He leaned against the frame and crossed his arms.
"It didn't go like you'd expected?"
"No," Ash sighed, pulling his shirt off and throwing it aside, "it pretty much did."
"You'll find her," Kyle told him, as Ash lay down on the bed, tucking his hands behind his head. Kyle ventured in and sat on the edge of the bed so he could see Ash's face. He looked worn out.
"What makes you so sure?"
"I remember when I came looking for the boys. It was all I could think about. You'll find her because you'll never stop looking until you do. She's your family."
Ash closed his eyes as he silently mulled that over. Kyle decided it was time to let him sleep. He moved to get up but suddenly a hand clamped around his wrist. Kyle's eyes met Ash's sad blue ones.
"Stay?"
Kyle did.
xxx
When Ash woke he wasn't alone. Kyle lay beside him and for the first time Ash really just wanted to wrap his arms around him and pull him close. He didn't want this space between them anymore. But he didn't act on it, Kyle was a good friend to him, and that was important to Ash too. He wouldn't jeopardise that. He checked his phone and smiled when he saw the time. Kyle was late for work. He sent a quick text to Mackenzie asking her to cover the shift. She was a capable chick, she could handle it.
Beside him Kyle stirred.
"What time is it?" he wondered, reaching for his phone. His reaction was about what Ash expected.
"Shit!" he made to fly out of bed but Ash grabbed his arm to stop him.
"Relax Luke, someone else can cut the sugar cane today." Kyle gave him a baffled look.
"What?" he blinked.
"The Thorn Birds..." Ash supplied. Kyle raised an eyebrow.
"Seriously? Isn't that a show for grandmas? Pretty sure it was around before we were born." Ash shrugged.
"It was one of Gran's favourites." Okay now he was in bed with Kyle talking about his grandma. "I texted Mackenzie."
"Okay," Kyle nodded, finally relaxing. Ash let go of his arm and sat up. Kyle fixed him with a thoughtful look, as they sat facing each other. "How are you this morning?"
"I'm okay. I'd say Brax has got more to worry about. Ricky wasn't very happy with us." Ash wasn't proud of the trouble he'd caused there.
"Brax can handle himself, remember? What about you? Billie's still out there somewhere."
"Yeah..." Ash frowned.
"What happened out there?" Kyle asked.
"We went to Broken Hill, ran into a fella Brax knew, he pointed us to White Cliffs-"
"Wait. Who'd you run into to?"
"A doctor, Sid something..."
"Walker?"
"Yeah, that's it."
"And he knew where Dean and Billie were?"
"He asked the bartender."
"Oh, okay. Sorry, you said he sent you to White Cliffs?"
"Yeah. So we went out there and found Dean's place but she wasn't there. We asked him a few questions but he reckoned he didn't know where she'd gone."
"You believed him?"
"Brax did. Considering the circumstances I don't think he'd lie..." Ash had to believe that, the alternative was too awful to consider. He couldn't think of his baby sister like that. She had to be alive and out there somewhere for him to find. But...
"Ash?" Kyle interrupted his thoughts. Ash looked up at him and when Kyle looked at him like that he could almost believe there was something more between them. That they did share a deeper connection. He trusted Kyle and so he voiced the terrible thought.
"He had her car. I did that car up for her. She either hates me so much she left it behind, or he kept it when he..." killed her. He couldn't say that part out loud.
"She'll be okay Ash," Kyle assured, resting a hand on his shoulder. "She probably saw her chance and took off. She must've known Dean would be able to track down the car." Ash hadn't thought of that.
"You really think so?"
"She's your sister isn't she? That makes her more than a pretty face." Huh? Kyle realised too what he'd said. Neither of them had time to really process it though.
"Hey Kyle," came Josh's voice as he barged into the room. "Can I borrow-" he stopped short when he saw Ash. "Ash, you're back. Did you find your sister?"
"No mate, not yet..." Ash told him, as Kyle pulled his hand away. Josh seemed to realise then that he'd interrupted something.
"Oh well then," he said, backing out of the room, "I'll leave you guys to it..."
xxx
What a dumbass thing to say to a gay bloke Kyle silently berated himself as he walked into Angelo's later that morning. And talk about shitty timing, like Ash needed anything else to worry about. As if he didn't have enough on his plate without thinking that Kyle might be flirting with him too. Not that he supposed it really mattered, he wasn't gay. Anyway, he already had his suspicions about who Ash's secret crush was, but that was a whole other can of worms.
Kyle was at least pleased to see that the place hadn't fallen apart in his absence.
"Thanks Mackenzie," he told the brunette behind the bar.
"No worries Kyle. Any shift you need covered I can do it. I might just need a little more than five minutes notice next time."
"Fair enough. I appreciate your help." He couldn't expect more from his employees than he was willing to do himself.
He got to work but his mind was only half on the job. He wondered what it must be like to be different like Ash. To have to hide how you were feeling all the time. It must be hard, it was no wonder he was so down, if he had this to contend with on top of the whole Billie situation.
It was a few hours later when Ash walked in.
"How did I know I'd find you here?" he sighed. Kyle didn't bother answering that. He knew Ash thought he worked too much but obviously he hadn't come here just to tell him that. "I forgot to ask you about Denny before," Ash continued, "she okay?"
"Yeah..." Kyle hesitated, unsure about what to say. He didn't want to lie but he didn't want to rile Ash up either. "You can't ask her yourself?"
"Things were kinda weird between us before I left. I wanted to talk to you before I saw her." What could he say? There wasn't really anything to tell anyway, but he knew Ash wouldn't see it that way.
Ash tensed.
"What happened?" he asked, obviously sensing Kyle's discomfort.
"She's been hanging out with Andy a bit." Determination stole over Ash's face. "Hang on," Kyle hurried to say, "don't do anything stupid. I talked to her about it and she said she's just giving him a second chance because Case did." Ash was obviously torn by that and Kyle didn't know how to help. He was saved from having to come up with an immediate solution when Brax and Ricky walked in. When Ash saw them his face lit up. The smile he gave Brax was the first one Kyle had seen on his face since they'd come home. And Kyle knew then he was right, he'd have to talk to Brax about this. He didn't know what they'd be able to do but they had to do something. Kyle had thought Ash seemed different and this was why. A crush had turned into something more.
"I'm sorry it didn't work out how you'd hoped," Ricky offered, bringing a hand up to fiddle with her necklace. Ash shrugged.
"At least I know she's not with that loser anymore." They continued to talk but Kyle wasn't really listening. He was too busy trying to figure out how exactly he'd go about telling Brax his best mate had fallen in love with him.