Chapter Nine: To Be

BPOV

I was quite shook by Ares' impromptu visit. It shocked me to say the least. I wasn't planning for him to come over. It was pretty stupid for why I was sick in the first place. I had simply had fallen asleep while my window was wide open. I caught a chill and I had ended up sick because of it.

My mind felt like it had constant headache. I was plagued with the idea of becoming a vampire. It would make me strong Bella. Not weak Bella. I'll finally be able to slap Edward across the face and not break my wrist in the progress. Although it was Ares and his family that made me to make this decision, it was nice for Ares to come over. I really did appreciate his company. He made me feel complete.

After our conversation about Edward, I finally felt free. There was no reason for me to continuously pain myself over him. We just weren't meant to be. As simple as that. It left me wondering if there was someone out there who will love me and never leave me. Like how Ares had put it, a soulmate. I smiled at the thought of someone who will love me unconditionally and who will never leave me. I looked down at the essay that I was supposed to be writing about Macbeth. There was a bit of work that I needed to catch up on, but nothing serious. I had simply sat in the library and worked on the things that I needed to catch up on.

To the left of me laid a pad of paper. The paper had a list of the pros and cons about being a vampire. I had to really think about this. Ambrogio had came over the other day and fully explained what was to happen if I chose to be a vampire or die. If I had chosen the latter, they would let me finish high school, then they will kill me in the most quickest and humane way possible, they'll snap my neck. It didn't sound pleasing. If I had chosen to be a vampire, they would change me just before I graduate and they will teach me the ways of the vampire. But the thought of killing another human almost sickened me. Ambrogio had said there were alternatives that I could choose. I could survive of animal blood like the Cullens, drink from blood bags, which Ares and his family did often, drink from only the scum of society, or just kill unsuspecting humans.

The first two options were what I was leaning towards if I was changed. But even then, in my immortal life, I wanted to distance myself from the Cullens. So drinking from blood bags seemed like the logical option. I had wondered if anyone was suffering due to less blood bags, but Ambrogio assured me that they didn't cause anyone any harm when they did use the blood bags and always left sizable amounts of money as donations to the local hospitals in the area.

With blood put aside, there were many things in the world that I wanted to experience with my human life. One of the big factors was, I might decide to have children one day, but I wouldn't be able to have a baby. Although I wasn't the maternal type. But to have that option taken away from me, kinda shook me a little.

I looked over at my laptop and saw the time, it was nearing midnight. So I packed up all of my homework as books and placed them on a neat pile on my desk, closed my laptop lid and mayde my way over to my bed. I quickly tied my hair in a bun and rolled over and went to sleep.

It was now nearing the end of November. It was cold and the snow was starting to come in. With it being cold all the time, I thought of a pro vampire point, I will never feel the cold, I will be durable and strong. At school Ares has been spending more time with me. It comforts me. Although he has been flirting with some other girls, and I'm not sure why, but my heart breaks a little when I see it happening, I just wish it could be me that he was flirting with. Not that I would be able to say anything cute in turn. Because my best pick up line is: "Did you fart? Because you are blowing me away." And I don't like looking like some lovesick puppy.

I really wanted to get to know him better and maybe a relationship with him, but I was scared. Scared, that he was doing to drop me like a sack of potatoes once his father's age was being questioned. I never wanted to be left vulnerable like that again. Although I suspect the reason why Ares was with me more often in the past week was that my deadline was closing in.

I just hope whichever one I chose would be the right one. If I were to die, their would be people that would mourn me and miss me. But the same would happen if I were to be turned into a vampire. There would be no mourning, but my family would miss me. And though I'm not close with most of my family, it's would be hard to leave them and potentially never see them ever again. Not to mention that I would easily out live them all.

I was sitting in the library, rereading my old copy of Romeo and Juliet when Ares walked in.

"Mon amour!" He called out as he took a seat next to me. He scooted over and leant down to my ear. "Ambrogio wants you to come over tonight after school."

Ares promptly stood up and left the room. My eyes followed him out of the room and he walked away. Through the small window, I could see a small trail of girls following him. They all made me jealous. Some part inside of me wanted Ares for myself. But I shook the petty idea out of my mind and focused on what Ares told me. If Ambrogio wanted to see me, then he must want my reply. And then again my mind was sent into another battle.

School had finished and I hopped into my truck and starting to drive to Ares house. When I pulled up, the house looked scarier than I remembered, perhaps it was due to my nervousness about choose ultimately between life or death. The idea alone sent chills down my back. I got out of my truck and slammed the door loudly behind me.

The sun was behind the house which casted a shadow over the front of the house. It made the house seem very unwelcoming and it made me very unsettled. I walked up to the door and was about to knock on the door when it opened. Ares poked his head from around the door.

"I heard you coming mon amour." He said.

I walked into the house and he closed the door behind me and rested his hand in the small of my back. It was comforting. I loved the feeling of it. It felt like he was supporting me. Little sparks went through my body when he first made contact with my back. I was used to it now. The sparks didn't bother me anymore when he touched me. But it was like a kaleidoscope of butterflies were fluttering in my tummy. I did get this feeling with Edward, but it was never this intense. There have been a few times where Ares' has left me weak at the knees.

We walked through the house. I have been here a little more often since Halloween, and Elizabeth and Selene always make a point to have the cupboards fully stacked with food for me. I found it quite touching. Ares opened the door into the living room and only Ambrogio and Perseus were the only ones in the room. Both Ares and I took the couch opposite them. Ares still had his hand resting on my back, and I didn't mind.

"I'm glad you came Bella." Ambrogio smiled at me. It was an inviting smile and made me feel less tense about the questions that were to come. "You probably know why we asked you here." I knew. They wanted my answer. I attempted to keep my face blank of any emotion. "Which one have you chosen?"

"I want to be a vampire." I say without hesitation. I almost knew from the start that was what I wanted. It was basically living over death, and I wanted to live. I want to try a new life and completely forget about Edward and his family. I could have a new family that will take me in and teach me their ways.

Ares until now was ridgered, like he was expecting something bad to happen. But the moment I spoke those words, he became relax and fully allowed himself to sink into the couch.

Ambrogio and Perseus smiled at me. "Now we have already notified the Volturi about the decision that has been made. With much convincing on our behalf, you'll be turned into a vampire after you graduate school. This should give you time to. . ." Ambrogio trailed off trying to find the right words.

"Say goodbye, and we can tie up any loose ends that might occur." Perseus stepped in and told me. I nodded at all of this information.

"Also, in March, myself, Ares and you will be going over to Volterra. The Kings would like to personally meet you." Ambrogio said as he finished up the conversation.

I once again nodded at this information. Ambrogio and Perseus both stood up and went off to somewhere else in the house.

"Why are you relieved that I've decided to become a vampire?" I turned to question Ares and his strange actions about myself being changed.

"Um. . . Uh. . . Well you see. . ." I could see that Ares was startled by the question and was trying to figure out a way out of it. "In the past few months of knowing each other, I've realised that I like you. And for you not to be in my life anymore, I couldn't imagine it."

"Really?" I asked.

"Truly. And to clarify, I like you more than a friend should." He smirked at me as we came in closer to each other.

In the briefest moment our lips meet. It was the best feeling in the world. It was like the cliche moments in books when fireworks erupted from one single kiss. His lips move in sync with my own. It felt like we were two puzzle pieces finally connecting together and being solved. Although his lips should have felt stone cold, they felt completely warm against my own. This was different from went Edward kissed me. Edward held back a lot and I don't know why, but when my lips touched Ares' it was like a caged beast had finally came out. He kissed me with what felt like all the passion in the world. Like I was the only girl for him. He pulled away all to soon. His forehead rested against my own. It felt nice. I was very flustered by the events that had just happened seconds ago. His cold forehead felt great against my own hot forehead.

"Well I feel the same about you chéri." I whispered to him.

His eyes lit up and he pulled away from our embrace. "My, my mon amour, when did you start learning French?" He laughed.

"I just know a few words." I laughed back at him. It was true. Rene went through a phase of trying to learn French. I'm not sure how, but I was roped into it and we sat listening to instructional tapes about how to speak French. I never thought that I would ever use it.

"Well I can change that." Ares gently pulled me in for another kiss.

I apologise for the very late chapter. Last week was a bit all over the place for me, but I got there in the end. Some may have noticed that the rating on the story has gone up, its gone up for later chapters.

But was this chapter worth waiting for? Please let me know!

I figured that Bella could have been more reluctant to become a vampire, as the main reason why she wanted to be a vampire in the actual story was so she could be with Edward, but Edward isn't in this story, and (until recently) she wasn't really going anywhere with Ares.

In terms of personalities, I've tried to have Ambrogio kinda like Carlisle in the fact that they both want to keep the peace and they are bloody good diplomats. Perseus on the other hand I wanted him more hot-headed and quite temperamental. So scentually they cancel eachother out.

I've just upgraded my laptop so I'm going to try and write more chapters in advance. Also a little bit of shameless promotion, I do have an Instagram account and I have started to post on it more regularly. The username is pewterpotter. So yeah.

I have been loving all of your feedback and reviews on this story!

Ps - Just responding to a review that I only just got. Bella is not a Mary Sue character. Mary Sue by defenintion is "seemingly perfect fictional character, [whom] usually perform better at tasks than should be possible given the amount of training or experience." Bella is neither of these. If I had turned her into a vampire and then gave her all the power in the world, then yes, she will be a Mary Sue. The Cullen's did break the 'law' when they left Bella and didn't change her. The Volturi are purely just checking up on the situation. Besides that visit has greater plot importance. It has slightly angered me. And as for the two books recommended from me to read, though they might be good reads, I'm not going to read to in an attempt to maybe get inspiration. I find that a bit wrong and it's not how I like doing things. I prefer to have my own ideas in the story. Yes this story loosely does follow the storyline of NM. And just to finish off this rant, if you don't like my book then don't read. I'm sorry for that. I was just a little triggered because I have had a shit week, that's all.