Hello my Loves! I decided to update AGAIN, because I can't tell those of who you keep Reviewing no LOL. I do want to take the time to thank you all so much for all the support. It's truly humbling!
Just FYI, I have somehow joined the Hayffie bandwagon, so I have posted two completely unrelated-to-this-story fan fics in regards to Haymitch and Effie. I'd LOVE for you all to read it and tell me what you all think in a Review, and if I should write a story about them (AFTER this one, of course), since I do ship them now.
The stories are called Not a Fairytale, and Let Me See the Best of You. I hope you all enjoy them as much as you enjoy this! And they're short one-shots, so they're quick and to the point. No suspense and drawing out story lines like in this one haha. FOR EVERY REVIEW I GET FOR THOSE STORIES, I'LL UPDATE THIS STORY!
Once again, thanks for all the support. Don't forget to Review ALL stories!
-thamockingjayandpeeta
I don't get nightmares as much as I used to. Not like Katniss does. I think because I live through my battles, while I'm awake. My flashbacks are my nightmares. The dreams that used to haunt me, of Katniss being a mutt, or me wanting to kill her, or her trying to kill me, those dreams don't haunt me when my eyes are closed and the moon is high.
No, they captivate me at random, for no reason at all, or for every reason. Who knows? All I know is one minute everything could be great, could be incredible, and the next, I could be far away, in another place, in another time.
I think I could live with the flashbacks, if they didn't hurt Katniss so badly.
I always shut her out afterwards. I didn't mean to. It just happened.
We were doing well. After we had agreed to do a small Interview for the grand opening, the "first major Interview from the face of the Rebellion," we were doing great. Caesar was the same as always, and the three of us still had great chemistry on camera. The grand opening of the bakery was fantastic, off to a great start thanks to the publicity.
But the flashbacks never went away.
They were less frequent now, which was fine, except that meant when they did come, they lasted longer, and they were brutal.
How long it took me to talk to Katniss afterwards normally depended on how bad the flashbacks were.
But we were getting better.
We'd finally grown into a routine.
The only problem is… we hated being away from each other.
Now that we were… what? Dating? Together? Now that we were whatever we were, it was difficult, really difficult, to go about our day, out of each other's sights.
When we weren't with each other, bad things tended to happen. Like I'd be taken to the Capitol.
We couldn't deny the overwhelming relief we had every single time one of us came into view.
I stayed with her most of the time, and it took us months for us to close the door while the other showered. At first we had to go downstairs at the same time, because we'd be so scared that something would happen to the other if we were apart. So I'd sit on the bed while she showered, and she'd do the same for me, then we'd make our way downstairs for breakfast.
Eventually, slowly but surely, we realized we couldn't live like this. I had a bakery to run, and she had to hunt. Having her at the bakery was a distraction I couldn't afford, because I tended to focus on her rather than the customers, and depending on what she was wearing, sometimes I'd forget about the bread I had in the oven and it'd burn.
I was nineteen, and despite having been a survivor of the Gamees twice, in spite having been hijacked by the Capitol, besides the fact that'd I'd killed before, I was still a hormonal teenager, and it didn't matter if she was wearing a skirt or pants, she was still Katniss Everdeen, and I still remembered the way she had touched me all those months ago.
Needless to say, the sexual tension was high.
So when I told her she couldn't stay at the bakery all day, because she was the most distracting thing in the world, she stopped coming.
She'd been amused, and I'd been embarrassed.
Still, it took some getting used to, not having her around, and we agreed that we had to always be home by sun down.
When she was late one day, walking through the door without a care in the world, I wasn't sure if I was pissed or relieved.
"You're late," I had said, walking out of the living room and following her as she made her way upstairs. Buttercup followed us.
"I know. I was talking with Greasy Sae and lost track of time."
I clenched my jaw together to get control of my rage. "If I'd known you were so close to the bakery, I'd have walked you home."
"I meant to stop in, wait for you, but like I said, I lost track of time." Why was she so damn nonchalant? I followed her to the bedroom and watched as she made her way to the bathroom. I turned and stared out the window, seething.
She came up behind me and pressed herself into me. I stiffened, but not like I would when I was about to have a flashback.
She knew this, so she turned me around to get a good look at me. "Peeta, what's wrong?"
"You're late," I repeated, and finally she got it.
"I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking, Peeta."
When did she ever?
I scowled and walked away from her, heading back downstairs to start on dinner.
I heard the shower running a few minutes later.
When she came down, Buttercup at her heels, in one of my shirts, that I knew now were hers, because I'd never get them back, she had her hair down.
Clever little fox.
She knew how to get to me.
"I've gotten comfortable, Peeta," she said without preamble, and I ignored her as I placed her food onto the table. "I know you're at the bakery all day, and then you come home. I forget it's not the same for me."
"No, it's not," I snapped. "You hunt, Katniss, and I don't know how long that takes you, but you're around animals, and traps, and bows, and… won't ever know if you got hurt until you're in front of me, whole, so when you aren't home by nightfall, I'm apprehensive. If Haymitch hadn't told me he'd seen you coming back from the woods, I would have been blind with worry."
"I just get so bored, Peeta. After I hunt there's literally nothing else for me to do."
"You could start a hunting class," and honestly I had no idea where that came from, but I just knew I loved baking, which I had no problem doing all day, and that Katniss loved hunting, so it'd give her something to do.
And I'd know where she was.
She cocked her head at me as I sat down. "A hunting class?"
"Yah. You could teach kids of a certain age group how to hunt." I spooned some soup into my mouth.
"Survive," she whispered, and I noticed a distant look in her eyes as she spoke.
"What?"
She spaced out for another moment. "Survive. I'd teach them how to survive, not hunt."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
I was handing Greasy Sae's daughter a cookie one day in August when I heard the bell chime as the bakery door opened. I glanced up and nearly dropped the cookie.
"Holy shit," was all I could say, taking one of Haymith's phrases.
The girl—woman—standing before me smiled brilliantly.
"Delly?"
She threw back her head and laughed at my astonishment, and then ran to hug me. I embraced her, tightly. After letting her go I ushered Greasy Sae's granddaughter back to the Hob, hung up the 'Lunch' sign to the door, and headed towards my office.
"What are you doing here?"
"I'm back," she told me. "I… I saw you and Katniss on TV a couple of months ago, when this place had it's grand opening. I had to come back. It took a few months to get my affairs in order, but I'm here."
"And your brother?"
"He'll probably come back in a few more weeks. His job asked him to stay a little longer."
"Where have you guys been? In 13?"
"Yah. We never left. I didn't think I had anything to go back to, even though I missed it. When I saw you on TV, I knew I had to come home." We made it to my office and Delly stopped. "Wow," was all she said.
"It's something, isn't it?" We stared at the painting for a few moments.
"I'm glad you guys ended up working out," Delly said softly.
We caught up, and by the time I remembered that I actually had a business to run, it was closing time.
"Why don't you come by for dinner?" I asked her as I closed up the shop.
"I can't tonight, but I'm free tomorrow night."
"I'll let Katniss know."
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
I ran home, smiling the whole way. I found Katniss in the kitchen, with Greasy Sae, and spilled the news.
"Delly's back!" They both looked at me. Greasy Sae dropped her spoon and Katniss just gaped.
"Back where?" asked Katniss.
"Here! In12. I just saw her. Spent the past few hours with her, actually. She came back to work her father's shoe shop since she saw the District was being rebuilt." I told Katniss all about our conversation over dinner, and told Katniss that I had invited her to dinner.
"Where's she staying?" Katniss asked.
"I'm not sure," I shrugged, taking a bite. "I never asked. I did tell her we had rebuilt the shoe shop, and she should talk to Captain Lao since she's the rightful owner. I'm supposed to meet her tomorrow during my lunch to go with her." I looked up at Katniss, who had a look on her face that I couldn't quite place. "Do you wanna come? She'd love to see you." A look that could only described as relief washed over Katniss' face, and for the briefest moment I got the feeling that she had been jealous.
"Yah. Sure. I'd love to," said Katniss, and after that she was a lot more engaged in the conversation.
Later on that night, while we were working on the book, Katniss stopped writing and looked at me.
"You seem happy that Delly's back." Her voice was borderline accusatory, and once again I found myself wondering if she was jealous. At her words Buttercup's head poked up, as if he was listening. He stared at me accusingly.
"I am. She's an ally." I frowned, turning away from the cat. "I don't know why I used that choice of words. She's a friend, a familiar face, someone-"
"Someone who doesn't remind you of the Games," whispered Katniss.
I reached out and touched Katniss. "I was going to say someone who remembers me before the Games."
"I remember you before the Games," Katniss said, and I held in a smile, because I figured if she caught me smiling, she'd get defensive. Instead I kissed her.
"You and Delly aren't in competition. She's not my Gale."
Now she did scowl, and I laughed, bringing her to me and kissing her again.
God it felt good to laugh.
I must have assured Katniss that there was nothing between Delly and I, because she decided not to meet Delly with me during lunch, and she was pleasant and cordial at dinner, and if Katniss had proven anything over the years, it's that when she didn't like someone, she could be downright nasty. Hell, even when she did like someone she could still be nasty.
But I loved her.
She did seem upset when she saw all the trouble I was going through to make Delly's favorite dessert of cinnamon raisins cookies, but she shut up when I opened the oven and she saw the cheese bread baking.
When she went upstairs to change I smiled in victory.
Towards the end of dinner Delly turned to Katniss. "How's your mom?" I'd forgotten that Mrs. Everdeen had gotten close to everybody while I'd been in the Capitol.
"She's fine. She lives in 4 now, but we talk about once a week. We're probably closer than we've been since my dad died."
"Why'd she move to 4?"
Katniss didn't immediately answer, and she glanced at me briefly, her eyes clearly reading 'Help!' Somehow saying, "Because she couldn't face Prim's death anymore than I could" seemed like a buzz kill.
"Mrs. Everdeen was just better suited for 4," I told Delly. "They have a brand new hospital she's working in. She's head nurse. She serves a better purpose there than here."
"Well when you talk to her, send her my love," said Delly. Katniss nodded. "So how's 12 been? The town looks so different."
"It's great," I responded.
"The bakery looks amazing. You still hunt Katniss?"
"You're eating game now," said Katniss.
"You still put it right through the eye?"
"Every time," I told Delly, and Katniss blushed. I wondered if she'd ever be able to take a compliment from me.
"Do you still trade?"
Katniss nodded. "I sell it for way less than it's worth, like Peeta does his bread, but we don't need the money."
"What else do you do?"
"I teach a survivor's class, teaching kids how to hunt. It's only been a few weeks, but it keeps my mind preoccupied. I couldn't believe how many people showed up."
"You're always so modest," laughed Delly. "You're the Mockingjay, Katniss. I'm surprised adults didn't show up."
"They did, but I made them leave."
Delly laughed again. "I'd take your class in a second."
"I can't risk the competition," joked Katniss. "If I taught adults how to hunt game, I'd lose my ability to trade."
Delly left a little while later, and when she was gone I wrapped my arms around Katniss from behind, burying my face in her hair. She relaxed against me.
"That was fun," she told me. "I needed that. I didn't even know I needed that."
"We have kind of shut ourselves away, haven't we?" She turned to face me and kissed me, and I felt that hunger stir. I had to pull away, because one day I'm afraid I'm gonna push her too far.
"Let's not do the book tonight," said Katniss. "Let's take a break, just for the hell of it. We shouldn't have to stop only because you have a flashback, or because I'm having nightmares."
"Okay," I agreed. "Wanna come to my place? There's something I want to show you."
FYI, that chapter you've all been waiting for, (the reason this story is rated M) will be posted next! Tell me how much you love it! ONCE AGAIN, THIS STORY IS RATED M FOR A REASON! This is your final warning! I can't wait to hear your reactions to this chapter, and the next. PROMISE me you'll Review!
XOXOX
-thamockingjayandpeeta