Asuka: You know Water-Star, I don't think you'll EVER finish this fanfic!
Water-Star: Yes I will, damnit! You know that I have difficulty trying to keep everyone in character, but everyone isn't so I have to make a situation of why it is so!
Shinji: Water-Star, you are aware some people do not like the Author's notes in script form! Let alone, the Author's Notes themselves!
Water-Star sighed: I know but it's fun! It makes the story seem more lighthearted! I'll let the readers decide! You want more interesting Author's Notes and know why I've written the way I have. Or make it like another fanfiction which only focuses on the story! I know what I want! Cast your votes in viewers!
Touji: Well while we're doing this episode of Author's notes, I believe there is something else you want to add!
Water-Star: Oh yeah! I am not going to further continue with this story until I get more reviews for my other fanfiction which is titled "Just reality for me"! Reason for that, is because I've put a lot of effort into that story and what I consider to be one of the best things I've ever written and I only have about 15 reviews! So no more "A chance" until my other story has been given more reviews!
Kensuke: Wow Water-Star, that's so bitchy!
Water-Star: I don't care! I won't continue until I at least get 10 more reviews for it! Besides, it's an Asuka/Shinji romance with a Cinderella theme! So who could ask for more?
Hikari: Set after Third Impact, right?
Water-Star: You got it! So that's my deal, readers. Anyway, onto the chapter!
Asuka: Wait! What about Disclaimer?
Kensuke: I'll do it!
Water-Star: How nice of you to volunteer! It's so unlike you!
Kensuke: I'm in a good mood! Water-Star does not own Evangelion and is merely using the characters for closure as she did not feel satisfied with the way things ended with the show.
Water-Star: You got that right! Now, onto the chapter for real this time.
Chapter 10: Midnight musings
That night Asuka tossed and turned in her bed as she struggled to fall asleep. She didn't have dinner that night because she refused to be anywhere near Shinji. This had sparked curiousity from Misato but she knew it would be best for everyone if she didn't say anything about it. Asuka knew she should let Shinji know that she forgave him, but the stubborn side in her said that if she let Shinji off then he'll end up betraying her again. And there were only so many times Asuka could forgive before enough was enough.
Knowing that sleep would be impossible for her tonight, Asuka slipped out of her bed sheets and decided to go out. She changed into some pants and a white tank top. She thought about bringing her red jacket with her but she dismissed the idea. Asuka did however, remember to attach her red nerve-clips again and placed her mobile phone in the back pocket of her green baggy pants. She then slipped her feet into her same white & gold tennis shoes and left the apartment.
Of course it was not difficult to believe that Shinji too, was having problems with falling asleep. Knowing that sleep would be impossible him tonight, Shinji got out from underneath the bed sheets and decided to get a glass of water. He slid the bedroom door open and was about to step out when he quickly noticed shadow movement and realised Asuka was the source. Shinji would've gone back into his room and waited for Asuka to go back into her room if he hadn't noticed her in her clothing.
'This is the second time Asuka's gone out at midnight! Isn't she aware of what could happen to her!' He thought, groaning mentally. Concerned for her safety, Shinji quickly changed into his jeans and a blue t-shirt before putting on his sneakers and running after Asuka.
Night time had always been a bizarre time for Asuka, at one point she considered it to be quite beautiful. It was a time for mischief and romance, yet misery at the same time, it also reminded Asuka of that night when she tried to seduce Kaji. That was the most humiliating & degrading moment of her life and Asuka would forever be eternally grateful that Kaji never mentioned that incident again.
'Kaji...' A small tear escaped from Asuka's eye and carefully slivered down her cheek. Kaji was the only man, let alone person, Asuka had ever really cried for after hearing that the person was unfortunate enough to have lost their life.
"I wish you were still here, Kaji." She whispered, looking up to the stars. Another part of Asuka also wondered if that was truly where her mother's spirit was resting. 'I guess I'll never know until I die!' The thought made her sigh, she desperately wished she could go see her Evangelion but the two remaining Evangelion Units had been destroyed shortly after the death of the seventeenth angel.
'Not that there was a lot left to destroy anyway!' She thought bitterly, remembering the emotions that conflicted inside her heart during that time. She could still feel the hate, anger & resentment bubble like acid inside her when Shinji told her what happened to Unit 02.
"You bastard! You killed her! You killed the only thing that was ever important to her! I HATE YOU, SHINJI! I HATE EVERYTHING!" She yelled to him, screaming at him to leave the hospital room with the fear that if he stayed any longer, Asuka would've broke down in front of him. He left as she hoped but after that Shinji changed, he worked harder to improve himself and became the man that he was today. While others were surprised at Shinji's new attitude, thinking it was his "hormones", Asuka knew that what she had said to Shinji had his motivation.
She wished it hadn't been so, thinking back now, Asuka knew that her words were harsh but they were true. Because of Shinji, Asuka lost the only thing that brought a connection between her and Kyoko.
'Did you ever love me, mama? Or was I simply a burden to you?' Had been a question that had been overly repeated inside her mind since she was four and Asuka wondered if she would ever receive an answer, but so far all she's only been rewarded with was even more questions.
Asuka stopped dead in her tracks, looked at the sky once more and yelled, "WILL I EVER GET AN ANSWER?!" The only response she received was the howling of dogs and silence. Fear flooded into Asuka when she realised how truly alone she was and how no one was there to protect her if anything should occur. Suddenly she wished Shinji was with her.
'Shinji, why him?! I know we've become friends but can I truly feel safe with him? That he won't hurt me as he already has? He knows everything about me now and our mothers introduced us years ago, but-'
"Can I truly feel depend on Shinji?"
"Yes you can," came the answer from behind her. Asuka gave a small yelp in surprise, quickly turning around in a fighting stance to face the threat but was relieved (yet annoyed) to see the person be none other than Shinji Ikari. "Shinji what the fuck were you thinking sneaking up on me like that!"
He cringed at the tone of her voice. "Sorry but- wait! Why should I apologise? You're the one who decided to go out for a walk during the middle of the night!"
Asuka was a little surprised at his response before being fueled by her own annoyance. "Well you didn't have to follow me! That was your decision, not mine!"
'Damn it she's right!' He thought knowing that things would definitely get messy if he did not think of a good reason of following her. "I wanted... to apologise to you. To say that... that I'm sorry for reading your letter." That was true, Shinji did want to apologise for invading her privacy.
Asuka suddenly found the ground to be incredibly interesting while gently bouncing the tip of her right foot onto the concrete before sliding it back firmly on the ground. "I forgive you, Shinji. The only reason why I was pissed off at you was because the idea of letting someone know me and I mean actually knowing, is a terrifying prospect!"
"Look Shinji, when my mother," for Asuka it was so difficult to talk about it with another human being as she had never done it before. But this was Shinji, he was a good man and he deserved to know. "When mama hung herself, it hurt a lot. But when I saw that she had hung that fucking doll, that killed me. It made me believe that if I can't trust the woman who was meant to love me unconditionally, why should I trust anyone else? I don't like getting close to people Shinji and you know that. Why else do you think I'm not interested getting involved in a relationship of any kind?"
Shinji looked at her with disappointment, but Asuka failed to notice. "Look, you're a good man, Shinji. Even though people have betrayed you through your life, you've still found it in your heart to be kind and accept them. Me? That's another story. Already it has taken four years for us to have a friendship and for me to admit all this. Imagine how it would take if I were romantically involved with someone? It would take six months before I'd let them on Second base!"
Both Shinji and Asuka chuckled at the small joke. It felt good to lighten the situation a bit but Asuka continued. "I'm not really making much sense as I'm lacking sleep but what I mean to say is, that it's hard for both the person and I to gain my trust. And I trust you, Shinji."
Shinji looked at her with astonishment and the feeling of hope dramatically rose inside his chest. 'Although she's not interested in a relationship now, maybe one day she will be. Maybe there is a chance between us if she trusts me enough to say this. I'll wait for you, Asuka. No matter how long it takes.'
"You still there Shinji?"
"Huh?" He asked, only just leaving his state of daze.
"Did you even listen to everything I just said?" Her sapphire eyes sharpened making Shinji mentally smack himself for his slow reaction.
"Yes! I'm just surprised, that's all!"
Her eyes softened. "I suppose it is a bit surprising to hear it from me, Asuka Langley Sorhyu, to reveal her heart to you of all people! Not even to Hikari or Rei, but you Shinji. Sort of like Holden Caufield when he revealed his heart to Sally, except she rejected him!"
"Yeah, it's a bit like that isn't it?" Shinji agreed with what she meant, not feeling offended at all.
The former Eva pilots looked at each with a comfortable silence before Shinji remembered something. "Hey Asuka?"
"Yeah Shinji?"
"What's the time?"
Asuka pulled her phone out and her eyes slightly widened before slapping herself on the forehead. "Verdammt! I forgot, we have school today! It's fifteen minutes since midnight!"
"Crap!" He exclaimed and the two teenagers ran all the way back to their apartment before it got any later. They arrived back at 12:37 a.m. and were careful not to disturb either Pen Pen or Misato.
"I'll see you in the morning," Shinji whispered when they reached to Asuka's bedroom.
"Sweet dreams, Shinji," Asuka whispered back.
"You too," Asuka smiled and closed the door behind her.
Both teenagers cold not be bothered changing into their pajamas and instead instantly fell asleep in their clothing. For the rest of the night, neither Shinji or Asuka had any problems sleeping.
End of Chapter 10.
Water-Star: And that's the end of that chapter!
Asuka: Pretty good if I say so myself!
Water-Star: Thank you, Asuka. I've finally gotten back into the groove of things! Actually, I've begun a new fanfiction but I need a beta so I was wondering to any of the authors reading this story, does anyone want to volunteer?
Touji: What's it about?
Water-Star: It just another Shinji/Asuka romance, five years of unrequited love, Touji & Hikari getting married. All the good stuff!
Rei: Sounds interesting but shouldn't you finish this fic and "Just reality for me" before you start another?
Water-Star: Well to be honest Rei, I probably have another three or four chapters left of this story and a epilogue, then I'm done with this story!
Pen Pen: AR RARW' WAR! (NO FREAKIN' WAY!)
Water-Star: I know it's so weird, this story has been here since my writing career so it'll be a bit sad when it's finished!
Shinji: And there'll be no more Author's Notes!
Everyone gasps.
Kensuke: Woah, I think I just figured something out!
Water-Star: What?
Kensuke: This sucks!
Water-Star: Yeah! This REALLY sucks!
Hikari: Oh well at least we have a few more sessions before the story is completed! We'll just have to make the best of it!
Water-Star: I suppose you're right, Hikari! I still have to write the gang finishing the rest of their senior year, graduating and then FINALLY getting Shinji & Asuka together! That part will follow on with my first descriptive sex scene! LOL!
Touji: Really? Aw sweet man! Be looking forward to that chapter!
Asuka: See I knew you were a pervert! Pervert to the MAX!
Kensuke: Yeah even I have to admit, that sounds fucked!
Rei: Now we've got Kensuke agreeing with Asuka?! Now this is officially fucked!
Water-Star: You're telling me and I'm the friggin' author!
Hikari: May we all live interesting times!
Pen Pen: Aaara wrwar rw! Wra Wawa Rar, wa waawr arr awarkr rkr krkraka wkakw wk ak Kawak Wawar? (You said it! Hey Water-Star, are you ready for our shoot down with the White Cobras?)
Water-Star: Yep! Let me just get my gun then we can head off!
Water-Star pulls out her machine gun from underneath her bed and grabs all the ammunition.
Water-Star: Let's go!
Kensuke: Hey can Hikari, Rei & I join? Pleeeeeeeeeeeassssssse?
Pen Pen: Awr, ara rarar kakakaka kqrrarwkwkrwawkwkw! K akw ka awwwwwwwww rara k, K'rk wawkra karr awawa kwak kwkwk-kaw ka wkwkwk aaa arrrrrrr rar, kr wak! (Alright, but bring your own firearms! If the cops catch us, I'd rather not have my finger-paw or whatever the fuck prints, on it!)
Rei: Sweet!
Hikari: Awe-some!
Kensuke: FUCK YEAH! WOO!
Then the trio too, pull out their favourite weapons and they all leave.
Shinji: Hey where'd everyone go?
Asuka: They probably couldn't stand being around you two any longer! Why must it always be me whose stuck with the losers?