Meow! Chapter Ten
Of Dobes and Wedding Rehearsals
"Heeeere cooomes the briiiide…aaaall dreeeessed in piiiink…"
Glaring, Sasuke took the closest opportunity to punch his best friend to get him to shut up.
"Ow, teme! What the heck?!" complained the blonde.
"Quiet," Sasuke hissed. "You're not supposed to talk during the rehearsal."
Naruto grumbled, but conceded. This particular summer's day was muggy, without a cloud in the sky to shade them from the sun's powerful rays. Both had been slapping at mosquitoes for the past eight-and-a-half minutes, but little red welts had found their way onto their skin despite.
Sasuke prayed it would be nice and overcast on the actual wedding day…standing here with the dobe in a heavy black tuxedo would be absolute torture. Who came up with the idea of the groom and best man standing at the altar together?! And Tsunade, the officiator herself was drunk out of her mind, so today they had Shizune for a temporary replacement.
"Ok people," the Hokage's assistant called after finally finding the right page in her forty-page script. "Let's get this show on the road!"
"Oink!" agreed that stupid pig she carried everywhere. Sasuke assured himself, it would definitely not be sitting on the altar for the actual wedding.
From the small crowd of required people, the bridesmaids and groomsmen found their partners and linked arms before walking as quickly as they could down the aisle between the rows of outdoor benches before retreating to the shade of a large tree. Naruto elbowed Sasuke behind his back, and inclined his head towards that stony Hyuga guy. Sasuke didn't protest, but raised an eyebrow in surprise to see him arm in arm with that weapons fanatic girl…he couldn't for the life of him remember her name. Tintin? Tomtom? Minmin? Penpen? Misamisa?
Once the procession had filed into their coordinated places, that brat that Naruto hung out with and the Hyuga girl's sister trotted down the aisle. The boy held a cheap-looking cushion, the ringbearer probably, and the girl mimed flinging rice and flower petals with a bored, unenthusiastic face. Possibly the gloomiest flower girl he'd ever seen.
A few of the assembled crown began to hum "Here Comes the Bride," and Sakura made her grand entrance.
Well, grand in the sense that she was pretending to be in a flowing dress and high heels while in actuality only clad in a red zippered shirt and her dark blue shorts. But still…Sasuke found her lovely, though he didn't do more than blush out loud.
She soon stood by his side, sneaking sparkly-eyed glances in his direction as Shizune read off the lines of her script with as much enthusiasm as she could muster in this blistering heat. Maybe it would be cloudy when the wedding was taking place…but no, he thought, Sakura would want it to be sunny and happy. As long as it wasn't this hot, he could live with it. What he wouldn't give to erase the sweat coating his tail…now the fur was going to smell funny until he washed it…
"Psst. Pay attention, Sasuke," his for-now-pretend bride whispered. "This is going to be the only rehearsal before the real thing!"
"Hn," he mumbled back, deciding to actually pay attention to the dark-haired woman's stutterings as she squinted at her script. After about twenty minutes of frantic page-flipping, she decided to just skip most of the speech and head straight to the vows at the prompting of the ones stuck standing in the blazing sunlight.
"Hm…ok, uh…oh! Here it is! Do you, insert name here…I mean, do you, Uchiha Sasuke, take this woman, Haruno Sakura, to be your lawfully wedded wife…"
His mind tuned out most of the speech, but he gave a sincere "I do" when the paragraph-long line of his vow was completed. Sakura reciprocated with a sweet smile, her hands squeezing his as she giggled at his vivid blush.
"Ok, um, anybody object to this marriage? Speak now or forever hold your peace."
"I object!" Naruto shouted from his stolen spot in the shade.
"Nobody objects? Ok, um…husband and wife, and stuff…you can kiss now."
As Sakura's arms flung around his neck and her lips crashed onto his, Sasuke sincerely prayed that the real wedding wouldn't be this disjointed. And that Tsunade would actually be sober. And that Naruto wouldn't try anything stupid.
There were a few wolf-whistles from the assembled groups when he kissed her back, but an icy glare in their direction quieted them. Some merely stared dumbfounded, having never seen the Uchiha display affection for another human being before.
"Ok, everyone! That's a wrap! See you all at the dinner tonight!"
Leave it up to Sakura's crazy parents to invite every single guest to a pre-wedding banquet in celebration of their only daughter's marriage. He sighed to himself as Sakura grabbed his hand and led him into the blissfully cool shade.
"Wow…" she whispered so only he could hear. "I think it's kind of lucky, actually…"
Her fingers reached up to gently pat the spots on his bandanna where his ears were hiding, also soaked with sweat.
"It's a good thing these showed up before…" she continued, "Or everyone else would know…"
He flinched, realizing her point and trying not to imagine what would happen if that had been their first kiss, and he had sprouted cat ears and a tail in front of everyone…
"Ugh, it's so hot," she muttered, wiping a layer of sweat from her forehead. "Let's go home, Sasuke. I'm dying out here."
He nodded, taking her hand and cutting through the milling crowd, most of whom were jabbering excitedly about who was wearing what to the real wedding.
"It's almost two, I could go for a nice sandwich. You want some salmon bits on yours?"
She giggled when he showed a hint of a smile. "You know me too well."
"Only because we've known each other for, oh, let's see…fifteen, sixteen years? Anyways, remind me later to go buy some more cress. I remember there's only a bit left."
"Ugh, how can you…eat that stuff?"
"Hey, it's cold, wet, and nutritious. Just the thing for a hot day like this."
"It's disgusting. Like eating clover leaves."
"Oh, and you would know? Oh, snap. We're already arguing like married people! Gah!"
Both allowed the confused mob of people left behind them to wonder what on earth they were doing, allowing spazzes like that to tie the knot in their fragile, breakable village. All hoped that this year, perhaps, the Hokage hadn't already spent the construction insurance on booze. They probably had no such luck.
"…So Mom and Dad are going to give a quick…well, quick for them, speech and we'll have a few toasts, and then we can eat. Ok?"
"…Fine."
She tilted her head. "Come on, Sasuke. What's wrong?"
His nose twitched almost unnoticeably. "You…still smell like cress."
She rolled her eyes, but then remembered his super-senses. If he really hated the stuff as much as he said he did, she was probably torturing him right now.
"Ok, ok, calm down," she murmured, getting up from their chair and stretching her hands up towards the ceiling. "If you want, I can go take a shower and you can prepare yourself for my crazy parents again."
"They are crazy," he mumbled defensively, watching her send him a quick wave before trotting up the stairs. His increased hearing detected footsteps, a pause, and the sound of running water from overhead.
He allowed himself a yawn, as there was no-one else around to see his fangs, and settled down into a more comfortable position. The cushions in the chair still smelled like that nasty cress, but underneath the wet vegetable smell, there was that sweet, sweet scent of cherries and a hint of vanilla.
Mmm…Sakura…
In a moment, he realized he was purring just at the smell of his beloved girlfriend. His guilty side complained that expressions of pleasure were one-hundred percent allowed when it came to Sakura, because after all…she was going to be his wife in a little over twenty-four hours.
His secretly panicky side was already terrified about what her parents would do to him. He tried to tell himself they wouldn't dare to try anything illegal in front of a roomful of people, but then again…they were the looniest pair of oddballs he'd ever had the displeasure of meeting.
No…Sakura wouldn't let them. I'll just sit the two of us as far away as I can from them, and we'll be fine…yeah…that's not a bad idea…
Satisfied with himself and no longer nervous, he wriggled around in the seat until he could curl up with his tail hanging over the seat, its tip just brushing the floor. But for the sound of water upstairs, the big old house was pleasantly quiet. No insects scratched around on the floor, no birds chirped outside…it was perfectly peaceful.
He yawned again, closing his eyes and relaxing for possibly the first time that whole week. Sakura could wake him up later, after she was squeaky-clean…
The thought of her without the smell of that cress lingering around made him purr softly again before his ears slowly drooped, and he was still.
"Come on, here's your chance, don't let it slip right through your hands…" she hummed to herself, toweling off the last of the hot water from her pink tresses before reaching for a hairbrush she had brought from home. She giggled to herself, wondering what Sasuke would say if she told him he left his collection of Axe and Old Spice bottles out in the open. He'd probably bristle, literally.
"Get ready! For the ri-ide of your li-i-ife…"
After unsnarling a particularly stubborn knot, she glanced in the bathroom mirror before thumbing a strand of hair out of her eyes and exiting the steam-filled room.
One hallway and flight of stairs later, and she was wondering why it was so quiet before going to look for her boyfriend.
"Sas-?" she began, but stopped herself when she entered the living room.
He was still in their special seat, but curled up in a ball with his fluffy tail hanging limply to the carpeted floor. His hands were under his head for a pillow, his eyes closed and his mouth hanging open, giving her a glimpse of the very tips of his fangs.
Had he not been liable to wake at the tiniest noise, she would've squealed at the sheer cuteness of his appearance. Every so often his cat ears even flicked, silently assuring the world that he was still alert and ready.
Tiptoeing as softly as the floorboards would allow, she made her way over and knelt down beside him. He didn't stir at all.
Hm… she thought while reaching out to gently scratch behind his ears. He looks so innocent, just lying there like that…I guess in some ways, he's just a harmless little kitty-boy who wants a bit of normalcy in his life…
She smiled as he began to purr in his sleep, his ears unconsciously perking up in anticipation of more scratches. She was surprised he didn't wake when his tail began to sway gently back and forth, its tip brushing along the floor.
I'm glad, Sasuke…that we have chances like this to be together. Even if you'll have to go off on a mission the minute the reception's finished…I know you'll be more than eager to come back home to be with me.
His head tilted upwards an inch or so, which she took as an opportunity to tickle him under the chin, provoking more purrs.
This is seriously unfair. When he changes back, he'd better be ready to give ME some lovin' after all this petting I'm giving him.
She sighed, remembering some last-minute paperwork that had been left in the kitchen. Getting up, she bent down for a quick kiss on his cheek, murmuring, "Bye-bye, Sasuke," before quietly leaving him happily purring away.
As she left the room, he opened one eye no more than a crack, and smirked.
Ok, to clarify. Cress tastes like anus.
And I'm back from a godawful vacation. At least i got me a Deidei plush :3
Up next: More putting up with the in-laws!