I'm sorry this is all so slow and kind of crappy. I'm un-beta'd and busy with my senior year of high school, but this is really going where I want it to plotwise. Thank you guys very much! Happy New Years! Love you all!
"Is that my niece, Lady Darcy?" Loki repeated himself more insistently, clearly determined to accomplish… something.

Crap. No running now.

Twirling a finger in Lucy's downy curls and gritting her teeth, Darcy forced herself to turn around and face the brothers.

"Lucy Jane Thordottir, I would like to introduce you to your uncle, Loki, God of Mischief. Loki, this is your niece, Lucy. She likes baths and being carried around like the princess she is, don't you honey?"

Darcy glanced at Thor, who was obviously confused but overjoyed by the exchange. She hadn't realized how heavily Loki's problems had weighed on Thor's mind, considering how jovial and happy go lucky her large friend was. It made sense, she supposed, but seeing Thor despair saddened her.

"Lady Darcy, Thor- may I join you at the table?" Loki's voice was normally modulated, with a BBC tone and inflection, but Darcy could hear a new, pleading note to his words. Without a word, Darcy gestured towards the breakfast table and returned to her spot next to Thor, who was positively beaming from ear to ear.

Lucy at this point was tired of the boring adult conversation and small talk, and made her presence known by shrieking a series of unknown baby words out to the captive audience.

Thor and Darcy were very used to the diva-like antics of the little princess, but Loki was startled, and asked, "Is she alright? Is the child ill?!" He rushed towards Darcy, unsure of what to do.
Darcy and Thor burst into laughter as Lucy stuffed her fingers into her mouth and kicked her feet. Loki realized his mistake and looked sheepish, and made his way to a seat across from Thor. Darcy sat to the side, away from either brother.

Silently, Thor handed Loki a plate. Loki looked at its contents, uttering a quiet "Thank you" before he dug into the food. Darcy discreetly examined Loki's plate- you could tell a lot about a man from his breakfast. Loki's plate was surprisingly full, with a pile of oaten cakes and ham, along with several peeled oranges and rolls.

Watching him eat was also strange. Despite his slender frame, Loki ate a LOT. Darcy was distracted from her observation by a quiet snoring- Lucy had dropped off to sleep. Grateful, Darcy moved the sleeping baby so she was cradled in her arms more comfortably.

Thor was also eating again; the god ate twice as much as an Olympic athlete, consuming more than 20,000 calories in a day if possible. Jane had once confided in Darcy that Thor's appetites had been frightening at first- the man was voraciously hungry for everything, in the kitchen and the bedroom. Darcy had laughed then, but now she wistfully wished she could have that complaint.

She supposed Thor had to eat, though. He was trying to repair a hopelessly mangled and torn relationship with his brother and what better way to mend it than with food? Shifting a bit, Darcy shut her eyes and rested, absentmindedly wishing she could feel Lucy's solid weight on her lower half.

He never meant to listen to her thoughts, but somehow he couldn't avoid it. At some point he had mentally connected with Darcy, probably subconsciously on both their parts. Mostly she was a dormant presence in his mind, something he could ignore unless she was concentrating on him.

The idea of her spending so much thought on him was disconcerting at times, but he felt he could understand the mortal's motives. He had, after all, crippled her and changed her life forever. Besides, after the previous evening, he was willing to allow the girl anything, to be honest. Somehow she had triggered an emotional response which had eluded him for years, and freed him from a madness he could not bear to endure.

She was really rather extraordinary for a mortal. It didn't truly hurt his pride to concede that a Midgardian could be special, but most of his people wouldn't approve of a notion like that. Loki knew that by normal standards, Darcy's tolerance of his presence was unusual. The fact that she could sit there, playing with a child despite her own barren state, watching the god who broke her back eat breakfast without batting an eyelash was beyond his comprehension.

Actually, she was asleep. Loki was a bit surprised at her comfort level with his niece, and as a slight wave of envy washed over him, he rejoiced. He wasn't sure how she had managed to force his mind to reknit itself into one, but he could never repay her. It was when his knife cut nothing that he realized that his plate was empty. Thor had filled it with his favorite foods; they had grown up together- played together, fought together. Thor's words from Germany, so long ago it seemed- they rang in his mind like a bell tolling.

Suddenly, she was in his mind once more. It wasn't a coherent sentence or even a thought- all Loki could sense was an overwhelming sadness over Lucy's weight on Darcy's legs. He couldn't understand it, so he gently probed her sleeping mind. It wasn't a fully formed idea at all- all Darcy was projecting was a desire for… normalcy.

She wanted to have a baby of her own clearly. The way she curled her arms protectively around her friend's sleeping child, even clung to her. Loki could scarcely bear the longing emanating from Darcy, and as she once again focused on Lucy and her legs, he supposed that maybe Darcy was mourning.

She could feel him staring, so she opened her eyes. Darcy was highly uncomfortable with the situation, and was surprised to see a strangely soft expression on Loki's face. It was unsettling, enough so that Darcy abruptly handed Lucy to her father and exited the room.

Thor turned to Loki, puzzled, and moved on. He had much to discuss with his little brother, and the first topic of discussion would have to be the nature of Loki's relationship with the frazzled brunette.

Darcy, in the meantime, had escaped to see Jane, her voice and literal Goddess of Reason. Jane was alone in her room, reading a scroll and sipping tea. Seeing her best friend look so pristine and calm was irritating to Darcy, but she pushed it aside to get to the real issue.

"Jane… I think I romantically like Loki."
The tea fell to the ground with a clatter.

"WHAT?!"

Darcy had expected that, considering the bombshell it really was. To be quite honest, she wasn't sure how or when it had happened- all she knew was that the look on Loki's face had made her happy.

Happy.

He, who had ruined it all, was able to overcome Darcy's crippling depression in an instant with a misty frown and eyes the color of the sea- he, who had broken Darcy, was able to cut through the emotional turmoil with a single look.

It was infuriating.

Jane was pretty mad too, and when Darcy explained her inexplicable feelings, she nearly screamed. Darcy had to listen to a long lecture on emotional responsibility and irrationality, and after a while Jane started sounding like a repetitive harpy, and Darcy had to get out.

By the time she had made it to her bedroom, a massive migraine was pounding behind Darcy's eyes, and the pain was almost impossibly intense.

Sipping on cool water, she got into bed, easing her aching back on top of a pillow. Lately her lower back had begun to throb whenever she was stressed, and although it wasn't intense, she was starting to get worried. In fact, Darcy was generally fatigued, all the time.

It used to be the depression, but now that had all but dissipated into an overwhelming confusion of guilt, attraction, and grief. She was tired, bone deep, and she wanted nothing more than a man to love her and for her legs to work again.

Closing her eyes to nap, Darcy allowed herself to drift and relax.

Loki had retired to his room after an arduous, endless talk with Thor, who had begged to understand what had gone so wrong.

It was incredibly difficult to articulate the sorrows of Loki's childhood compounded with the revelation that he, previously Odinson, was now Laufeyson- a Jotunn. Thor actually took that part well- it was the bargaining with the Chitauri that truly grieved his brother. Add to that his humiliating defeat on Earth, as well as Thanos, the mysterious force which had originally controlled his mind.

Thor had been overjoyed to find that Loki was not entirely in control of his actions and decisions while he had been on Earth, and had immediately ran to report to Odin.

Loki had stripped to his under armor clothing, simple breeches and a linen tunic that did not over heat him. As he reclined on his bed, his old bed of his childhood, a sudden wave of sleep enveloped him. Soon he succumbed to the grogginess and fell into a deep sleep.

Darcy didn't know where the fuck she was. Her legs were working, so she knew it wasn't reality, but she definitely wasn't dreaming. It was a room similar to the library where she had met Loki two nights ago, which led her to assume that the situation had something to do with said God.

"Loki? You here?"

Darcy roamed the room, enjoying the rare mobility. After waiting a few beats, she broke into a run, feeling a freedom she had never before experienced. She ran and jumped and danced for what felt like hours, but could only have been ten minutes at most. Out of breath and exhilarated, Darcy took a moment to catch her breath.

Bent at the waist, she meditated in her own way, by touching her toes and clearing her mind. That concept went to hell when the sound of clapping approached her, joined with the heavy thud of a leather boot meaning he had finally decided to show up.

"You put on quite a show, you know." He was Mischievous Loki right now, and she wasn't sure if she liked it. Darcy knew she was vulnerable to his charms at the moment, and was scared of giving any indication of liking Loki.

In response, she flipped him the bird and asked, "Where are we?"

Laughing, Loki gestured about him expansively.
"This is where we meet when our bodies slumber and our minds awaken."

"You mean, we're dreaming and somehow we're in each other's dreams?"
Loki sighed heavily and shook his head at that, clearly annoyed at her logic.
"Did I say dream? If I was dreaming right now, you would be unaware of it when you awakened, and vice versa. This is a connection akin to an astral projection- it seems you've taken residence in my thoughts, Darcy of Midgard."
His playful, teasing tone was getting difficult to bear, and the revelation that she was somehow connected to Loki was unnerving.

"Does that mean you can read my thoughts?" Her concern was quite palpable, as was the obvious horror written all over her face.

Loki laughed again and shook his head. "No, Lady Darcy. You merely tend to show up in thoughts when you subconsciously wish it- or so it seems. You have yet to make a conscious effort to reach out to me."

Her inner scientist's interest was piqued, but Darcy controlled it by asking, "Can we sever this bond?"

Loki's buoyant mood seemed to flicker at her inquiry, and Darcy could feel a twinge of guilt, but she forged on.

"I know not, my lady."

With that, Darcy could feel herself returning to her own, separate, lonely consciousness.

As she awakened, she found tearstains on her face and pillows.

OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo OoOoOoOoO

She spent some weeks awkwardly avoiding him. It wasn't blatant, but it was obvious to all who knew Darcy that something had occurred between her and Loki.

Jane approved of Darcy's avoidant, ambivalent behavior, and was openly supportive of her at all times. Thor, on the other hand, was not as pleased. He had hoped Darcy would help him rehabilitate his brother, who was now under a sort of godly probation under Odin's supervision.

SHIELD had also been debriefed on Loki's mental breakdowns, as well as the involvement of Thanos in his decision making. Although Fury was less than pleased to hear of a new threat, he was glad to remove Loki from his list of people to kill/torture/punish.

Odin had shown little signs of approval for his son's apparent recovery, and instead continued his preferred ignoring of Loki. Darcy wasn't exactly thrilled, considering that it had been an original cause of Loki's issues, but she had her own problems to worry about.

SHIELD had also informed her that she was no longer a psychiatrist for their agency, citing reasons of "great service" and offering her an early, honorable retirement.

It really meant that they wanted her to stay on Asgard as a minimum risk witness to Thor and his fellow Avengers, and that infuriated her.

Although she was initially upset, Darcy hadn't actively felt any anger or loss at the time. She was only made aware of her feelings through a series of midnight mental liaisons with a certain green-eyed monster.

"We have to stop meeting like this, Lady Darcy."
"Shut up Loki, I don't know how to shut off our stupid dream-connection."

He was irritated at this. "It's not a dream; it's your very being reaching out to me of its own volition."
This made her angrier.

And that was when she began to cry.

"What's the matter?!" Loki was terrified of a crying Darcy, as he was usually the cause of the tears. This time, however, she was upset about her pink slip.

"I don't know why they couldn't just let me stay and be useful!"

He wasn't sure who she referred to, although he had his suspicions. He wasn't close to Darcy at all, since of late she had been out of his sight due to his sister-in-law.

"SHIELD. Fucking SHIELD and stupid Fury fired me because they didn't wanna deal with my shit anymore. As though I haven't dealt with shit because of them, right? I first lost my ability to live my life, because Thor came into our lives in New Mexico; and then the fiasco with you in New York and my legs… and then I got all depressed and fuck it all if SHIELD isn't the reason for all of this?!"

She was openly upset now, so Loki awkwardly attempted to comfort her. He laid a hand on her arm, hoping she would stop crying, but instead she shot him a murderous look.

"What, may I ask, are you doing?"
He panicked.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! I'll just go away, I'll… I'll try to end this connection right now, sorry!"

She shocked him for the millionth time when she shook her head and laughed.

"You know what? Don't. I like this. I like being able to walk, I like talking to you. Or, arguing really. It's escapism, but it's totally necessary."

He wasn't sure why, but he was glad she hadn't let him close their connection.

So it went.

Darcy stayed in Asgard, unofficially as the girl who fixed the unwanted Frost Giant. She was totally isolated, shunned by most Asgardians as unworthy of their attention. She had no contact to Earth, no friends besides Jane and Thor who were both very busy, and no access to the internet. This led Darcy to two things.

First, she replaced Lucy's nanny as her caretaker.

Second, she made a truce with Loki.

The former was obvious- she loved the girl and knew how to play with her and put her down for naps just as well as her mom and dad.

The latter though… it involved two weeks of sleepless nights without any astral psycho-shit.

Darcy decided that she liked talking to the dude, even if it meant emotional trauma and hormonal fluctuations of the horny sort. Somehow, she had gone from absolute hatred to a manic attraction coupled with disgust and mistrust.
Darcy was afraid she would get in over her head, but then she figured, Why not?
So she would read books and discuss them with Loki in the library, if he happened to be there. (He always was after 2.)

So she would experiment in the kitchens and make chocolate chip cookies for Lucy (and Loki, and Thor, and Jane, but mostly Loki).

So she would visit with the god on a nightly basis, bickering and walking and exploring the stretches of the human/godly mind.

It was okay, better than before but mostly just alright. Darcy knew that desolation could come at any time, so she made the most of the moderate happiness she was experiencing.

Sometimes, in her real, non-connected dreams, Loki would be present… except he would be her husband, holding a baby, or holding her in his arms….

And that was the most dangerous threat to her happiness, wasn't it? But conversely, they were the sweetest dreams of Darcy's life, and she would wake up to a smile on her lips.

I'm so tired of not shoving Loki/Darcy together into a loving, healthy relationship.

Damn this stupid plot. Really though, thank you all. Please read, review, and tell me how to improve. If anyone is interested in beta'ing, PM me please, I'd love the help. Also, look for a real step in the romantic part of Darcy's life next chapter.