#10 Mile High Lessons

Summary: Turkey is being an annoying brat, so Greece teaches him about the Mile High Club.

Genre: Humor

Rating:T

Warnings: Implied sexual situations, explicit language

Word Count: 864

(8 hours to Japan)

He's bored out of his mind.

The flight from Turkey to Japan is an eleven hour ride, no stops in between, and he thinks that if he sits still for one more minute, he's gonna lose his fucking mind. The fact that Greece is currently sitting next to him, snoring away, isn't helping in the least.

"Oi! Wake up!"

"Wha—" Greece jolts awake, looking around with growing confusion. Then his eyes land on Turkey and the confusion morphs into irritation instead. Turkey suppresses the urge to giggle vindictively. "Why'd you wake me up? I was having a nice dream about being a cat…"

"Cause. I'm bored. Entertain me."

Greece huffs. "You're so selfish." Then he turns away from him and starts sleeping again.

Turkey throws his little pillow at the man and kicks his leg. When that fails, he jams the "call stewardess" button repeatedly, delighting in the loud ding that it makes every time.

"Cut it out." Greece stops trying to sleep and crosses his arms, glaring at Turkey instead. "What do you want me to do? Dance?"

"Sure."

"Screw you. I'm not your slave." Greece gets up, presumably to go use the washroom and get away from the annoying nation sitting next to him. He'd only agreed to this trip because Japan had very insistently invited them both to a party at his house, and Greece had been trapped in Turkey at the time on business. It had seemed logical that they take the same plane. Greece curses himself. He's never listening to his brain again; it makes terrible decisions.

When Greece reluctantly ambles back to his seat, he finds Turkey impatiently kicking the chair in front of him and tapping his fingers noisily on the window. The poor guy having his seat kicked looks like he wants to strangle somebody. Greece really hopes he does.

(7 hours to Japan)

"Goddamit I'm so fucking booorrredd!" Turkey sighs like a drama queen and flings himself against his chair, banging against it impatiently. He shreds one of the magazines the airline had provided, wads up a little piece of paper, pops it in his mouth, and spits it at Greece's sleeping face.

"Wha—" Greece jumps a little, startled out of a peaceful dream. For a second he thinks that they're being hijacked by terrorists, then another spitball hits him right in the eye, and he decides that this is even worse.

"Dammit, you bastard, stop it. What do you want from me?"

"I dunno, entertain me."

"How? Talk to you? Because we have such stimulating conversations?" Greece is surprised at how sarcastic he's being. Turkey always brings out the worst in him.

"How bout you give me a sexy little lapdance?" Turkey waggles his eyebrows suggestively. The man flirts like a whore, even with people he supposedly hates.

"Go screw yourself." Greece squeezes his eyes shut and tries to sleep.

(6 hours to Japan)

Greece is brought back to consciousness by a tingling pain in his scalp. He ignores it and starts drifting back to sleep. Then he feels it again: a sharp, quick pain like a needle prickling his head. He opens his eyes and scratches at the spot.

"Aw damn, only 8." Turkey looks disappointed that Greece is awake, which is strange enough to make Greece curious.

"What are you doing?"

Turkey holds up one hand, and there are several strands of hair in it. Brown hair. Curly, brown hair.

"Is that my hair?"

"Yup. I was testin' to see how many I could pull out 'fore you woke up. I got 8."

"…You bastard."

"You got a better idea for keepin' me entertained? If not, just go back to sleep and lemme try to break my record."

Desperate situations call for desperate measures. Greece remembers Turkey's lewd suggestions earlier, and has an idea. "Want to join the Mile High Club?"

"Whasat?"

Greece smirks evilly. "Come with me. I'll show you." This is going to fun.

(5 hours to Japan)

"Hey, Greece. Hey!"

"What."

"Let's go join that miley club again!"

"…"

(4 hours to Japan)

"Oi! Greece! Wake up!"

"What."

"I'm bored. Let's go do that highy thingy again!"

"…"

(3 hours to Japan)

"Ey! Greece!"

At this point, Greece thinks he's created a monster and is praying to whatever Gods exist to please, please make Turkey's dick fall off from the air pressure or something, so he can finally get some rest. At this point, he's going to show up at Japan's party and limp like an old man, and wouldn't that be both ironic and sad.

Then Turkey's hand closes over his and strokes it with a gentleness that Greece would've appreciated an hour ago, when he'd nearly ended up with his head in the toilet. Greece looks at the other man, and sees the sparkle of excitement there, like a kid in a candy store. The smile brightens up Turkey's whole face, and suddenly he doesn't look so old and haggard as gruffly handsome and sort of charming.

So maybe it wouldn't hurt to renew his membership to the Mile High Club. Again. And again. They have 3 more hours to kill, after all.