Tsunade and Jiraiya have a conversation in Tsunade's office.
Tsunade Jiraiya, we have a serious problem…
Jiraiya What is it?
Tsunade Well, Orochimaru is still at large… and blah blah blah… blah blah… blah… JIRAIYAH!!
Jiraiya Wha… huh? What is it?
Tsunade You were staring at my boobies, weren't you?
Jiraiya No, I was looking at your tits. Big difference, and I do mean BIG. So… big… holy shit… (bloody nose).
Tsunade You want to see… it up close?
Jiraiya Damn right!
Tsunade (punches his face) STFU!
Later… outside in the leaf village…
Jiraiya How can I find something that… large?
Naruto Hey pervy sage!
Jiraiya Naruto, just the guy I wanted to see… can you do the sexy jutsu?
Naruto If you teach me something…
(Does sexy jutsu) (Jiraiya drools)
Jiraiya Now do Tsunade.
(Transforms into Tsunade) (Jiraiya gets nosebleed)
Jiraiya Now do me!
(Returns to normal)
Jiraiya NO! As a woman, not a guy!
Naruto Shut up perv! (walks away)
Jiraiya Oh… I guess I'll just find some hookers. I hope they don't have aids.