A/N: Thank you all for your amazing reviews, I'm even more inspired to keep writing when I see how much you all are enjoying this fic.

This chapter is really long, I felt I should be nice after the last few chapters.

"Hey Baby." He smiled sighing, his voice breaking, as if he was about to cry.

Erin launched herself into Jay. Holding him a sight as she could. He winced, her grip was too strong.

As she pulled back from him he stared at his girlfriend, looking her up and down. She had changed even more in the last two weeks since he had last seen her on their video chat.

Her bump was more than noticeable now, she was still tiny, her perfectly rounded stomach made Jay's heart swell. Her cheeks had filled out a little more since they had last seen each other too.

Was it possible that she was even more gorgeous than before he had left, her smile and happiness radiated out of her. The navy blue dress she wore clung to her body in all the right places, highlighting where their baby grew within her.

"What're you doing here!?" Erin squealed, her eyes filling with tears. Her hands cupping his bruised cheeks.

"I got discharged. Medical discharge." He announced, he knew her heart would break when he told her.

Erin have him a quick once over. He seemed fine physically, despite the dark circles under his eyes, and and the bruises that had almost disappeared from his face. And how he had winced when she had hugged him. She looked up at him waiting for an explanation.

"The-There." He looked like a haunted man, his eyes somehow changing from that piercing blue green she fell in love with to this dark disturbed look that glazed them over. "There was an accident. An attack. And everything around me was destroyed." He seemed to leave wherever he was just now in his head. Like he had been transported back there to that day.

Noticing his change in demeanour, Erin took his hand in hers and made their way out to the balcony of the venue, that overlooked the skyline.

They sat a the small set of chairs and table outside, Jay quickly removing his suit jacket and hanging it around Erin's shoulders. Taking her hands in his he began to tell her of what exactly had gone down for him to be sitting in front of her now.

She never commented or asked questions as he recounted what had happened, just listened to the terror that filled her boyfriends voice. "There was an accident. And my team was transporting all these families to another location. A safer location. All I remember is watching Jesse, one of my guys, loading the last of the women and children into this big bus. And the men of these families waving goodbye to their loved ones as they left. And then-then." He tried to continue, his face falling into Erin's shoulder.

"Baby. It's okay. You're okay. You don't have to talk about it." She soothed him, her hands rubbing up and down his shoulders. "No. I need to. I didn't want to talk to anyone there. All I could think of is being here with you, and telling you everything."

Erin sighed, as he squeezed her hands. "Then out of nowhere came this deafening noise. And cloud of smoke and sand and dust. And everything around me just exploded, the buses, our base camp, the shelter. Everything. And all I remember is waking up. Everything hurt. One of the cement columns in the shelter had collapsed and pinned me underneath it. I was lucky, only my shoulder was dislocated. And a few ribs cracked."

Erin looked at him in disbelief. It had only been two weeks since she had seen him last during their Skype chats, and so much had happened.

Words couldn't describe how Erin felt at the moment, she was so relieved that Jay was okay, but distraught at how the families of all of those lost in the blast must be feeling right now. All she wanted to do was hold Jay and take away his pain.

But she couldn't. As hard as she wished. She couldn't. All she could do was be there for him, whatever he needed. She would walk through fire for him if it meant he would be okay in the end.

Lindsay held Jays face in her hands, then pressed her lips against his. She had no idea how much she had missed this, that feeling that came from within her when they kissed.

"Can we get out of here?" He sighed, almost begging. Erin smiled weakly, and without speaking. He knew she wanted to as well.

The cab ride back to their apartment was long, a few traffic accidents had all of the main streets leading to their place blocked off. But they didn't mind.

Erin closed her eyes, her head resting against the window of the cab, listening to the sound of Jay's breathing and the rain patter down outside the car.

Jay sat with his head on Erin's shoulder, his hand resting gently on top of her bump. "I can't believe how big he's gotten since I've been gone. I was only gone a month." His smile had returned since rehashing the details of the attack. He was infatuated with touching his girlfriends stomach, it made him so happy to be home. He was overjoyed that he would be able to here to experience this. With Erin. His Erin. His girl. "You don't even know if it's a boy. I don't even know." She teased.

"I have the fatherly instinct." He continued. Halstead brought his hand up from her belly to her face, brushing a stray hair from her eyes. "God I missed you. The two of you. I love you so much Er."

"Ahh" Erin winced, holding the side of her stomach. "What's wrong!?" Jay panicked.

Erin started to giggle, placing both of her hands on the side of her stomach. Jay smiled as he watched her laugh, she had made him go into panic overdrive for a split second. "Feel this." She placed his left hand on the left side of her bump.

"I don't feel any-." He stopped, as he felt it, for the first time. The first kick. Jay looked up at Erin from under his eyelashes. "Oh wow. That is incredible. That's our boy." Erin put her hand next to his. "Today has been the most perfect day. Thank you."

"I'm so glad I got to come back to be here for this. To feel this."

After they had arrived home, Erin immediately took off her heels and started to take off her dress, changing into her pyjamas, Jay's 'The Clash' t-shirt.

"Jay. I need to ask you something." Erin began, taking a seat on the edge of the bed. "Why wasn't I notified after the attack." Her tone had changed immensely from when they were in the cab.

It had been on her mind ever since hey had sat out on the rooftop balcony at the engagement party, but she had never found the right moment to ask him.

"Because I asked them not to." He confessed, pulling on his sweats. His torso still a tad purple and blue from his broken ribs. He took a seat on the bed beside Erin, pulling her closer to him, his hand resting on her leg. "After it happened and I woke up in the infirmary, they asked me who I would like contacted as they had tried to call here and no one answered. And they don't leave messages, they prefer to actually speak with the families."

Erin nodded, as he told her the truth. "So they called the District and Hank answered the phone. You had already left the bullpen, so he took the call. And asked to speak with me. I told him not to tell you, because I know you would worry, and stress and I knew it wouldn't be good for the baby if you were all worked up. I told him that I would be home by today, and I wanted to surprise you."

Deep down, Erin wanted to be mad. She would have wanted to know as soon as possible if he was hurt. But she knew he was right, she would freak out and stress herself and the baby out.

"Well you definitely did. And as much as I hate to admit it, you're right. I would have been a mess and it wouldn't have been good for this little guy." She admitted to him.

Erin collapsed back onto the bed, Jay followed, his head on her chest. Erin kissed the top of his head. His hand lay next to his on to top of her protruding stomach.

Lindsay had been dreaming about this moment for so long, but she had pictured it differently. Her waiting at the airport for Jay with their newborn son or daughter. But this, was even better than she could have ever imagined.

"Hey there little one. It's your Dad." He kissed her stomach gently. "And your Mum and I love you, so much. We can't wait to meet you." The two detectives faces lit up as their baby started to kick profusely.

As they lay there in each other's presence, thoughts drifted through Jays mind, he was still so disturbed from what had happened in he last week with the attack, but his thoughts and worries were taken away as soon as he had laid eyes on his partner, best friend and girlfriend and felt their baby move and kick about.

Erin flipped Jay on his back carefully, and straddled him, her body hanging above his own, and began to pepper kisses all over his body and neck, she had craved him, just as he did her. "You have no idea how sexy you are Erin Lindsay." He cheekily grinned, his hands snaking up and down his body, grabbing her butt in the process.

"Detective Halstead, how dare you." She joked between rough kisses.

Erin lifted her shirt off exposing her naked body, it was the first time Jay had seen her like this since he had returned, his eyes took in every inch of Erin's tiny frame and her now protruding bump. "You have no idea how beautiful you look Er. I have craved this for so long." He said as he kissed her body.

"Oh I think I do baby. I've been craving this moment since you left that day." Lindsay sighed heavily, she hadn't been this turned on in her whole life, maybe the whole crazy-sex-pregnancy hormones thing Nat had told her about had finally kicked in.

She didn't care either way, if it was the hormones or not, she wanted Jay so badly. No, she needed him. As he needed her.

The scene from that day last week replayed in Jay's head. Just as it had every night since it happened.

Only this time, he could see the faces if the people getting on the bus, Erin, and their baby, Will, his Mum and Dad, and his entire team from Intelligence.

He knew how this scene ended, like it did every night. He couldn't scream, he would open his mouth to tell them to run, and not get on the bus, but no words ever escaped his lips. Just as his legs would never carry him towards what was about to unfold, time and time again.

The bus drove off into the sun, leaving a haze of sand behind it. And then it happened, again. And again and again. And all he could do was watch, as everyone he loved and cared for was blown into oblivion.

"ERIN!ERIN!" Jay yelled at the top of his lungs, waking himself up. He shot up in bed, shaking, covered in a cold sweat.

Erin immediately woke to the sound of Jays voice filling the apartment. "Jay. Baby." She took him in her arms, his whole body collapsed into her, as he burst into tears, he heaved and sobbed, as Erin tried to soothe him. "It's just a dream. I'm right here, okay?"

She held for what felt like hours, he had lost it completely, he was mentally and emotionally distraught. After some time, his sobs finally subsided. "What happened baby?" Erin whispered, running her fingers through his hair.

"It was the same nightmare I keep having ever since the attack. But this time, you and everyone else I love was on the bus. And then it-" Jay faltered. He couldn't speak those words.

"It's going to be okay. You're going to get through this. We will. Together. Okay?"

A/N: I hope you all loved this. Please keep the reviews coming. It means a lot to read and see much this story is enjoyed by you all